Labour Planning to Purge Scandal-Ridden Candidates mdi-fullscreen

Not content with clearing the Corbynites out of selection proceedings, Sir Keir is now looking to purge scandal-ridden MPs from his party’s ranks. According to The Times, up to a dozen MPs could be in the firing line as the party looks to clean up its image for government. A party spokesman said “Keir’s changed Labour Party” will deliver the “highest standards” of representatives, with another source saying they would “clear the field” based on “behavioural, reputational issues” – rather than factional or political ones. Amongst the offenders named were Liam “no money” Byrne, catfish Khalid and re-instated bully Neil Coyle.

Other names on the agenda could be those previously suspended, pending investigation, including: Bambos Charalambous, Geraint Davies, Diane Abbott, Conor McGinn, Christina Rees and Nick Brown; whilst some have already been barred from standing again – Jeremy Corbyn and Claudia Webbe will be well known to co-conspirators. Guido is happy to lend Labour HQ a hand by reminding them of more “behavioural and reputational issues” still outstanding in their party ranks:

  • Rupa Huq recently had the whip restored after referring to Kwasi Kwarteng as “superficially black”. This is despite Labour’s “zero tolerance” policy and Starmer’s admission the comments were “racist”…
  • Kim Johnson was forced to apologise for “disturbing language” after calling Israel a “fascist” state.
  • Clive “Get on your knees, b*tch” Lewis has a history of inflammatory remarks and behaviour.
  • Wes Streeting publicly apologised after a series of tweets referring to women as “b*tches”, “cows” and “tarts” resurfaced.
  • Karl Turner admitted to sharing a fake image of Rishi Sunak on social media, he’s also been accused of using abusive language and sexual harassment.
  • Shadow Minister for Mental Health, Rosena Allin-Khan has faced multiple allegations of bullying.

This is ignoring Starmer’s own acid-tripping admissions, Angela Rayner’s affinity for apple products and Rachel Reeves’ register of interests rule breaking. Guido could go on…

mdi-tag-outline Labour Party Standards
mdi-account-multiple-outline Keir Starmer
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