The race for the Tory candidacy in Andrew Bridgen’s seat of North West Leicestershire is getting nasty today as two candidates have launched complaints against another for allegedly violating prospective candidate rules. A Tory majority of 20,000 guarantees a hard-fought battle…

Guido can reveal that the complaint relates to a 10-page campaign document that long-list candidate and former Labour council candidate Raaj Shamji supposedly sent to the chairman of the selection council explaining how he would campaign and fundraise for the area. This is against the rules in the sifting period – other candidates will think Shamji had an unfair advantage. Tories are no strangers to drama in the pre-election elections…

UPDATE: Shamji says he hasn’t sent any 10-page document to the chairman, who tells Guido that Shamji acted “appropriately and within the rules” throughout the process. Briefing wars…

The Tories are gearing up to select a candidate to fight Andrew Bridgen for his North West Leicestershire seat. The sifting committee has drawn up its long list and the prospective candidates have been informed. Guido understands that the full list consists of:

• Andy Carter – MP for Warrington South with a Tory majority of 3%. Carter was one quarter of the Kangaroo Court’s “Tory Majority” and has been looking for a safe seat to run to for some time. Association members may have strong opinions on Carter’s treachery…
• Meera Vadher – Formerly Andy Street’s chief of staff and transport SpAd currently at the No 10 Policy Unit.
• Raaj Shamji – Deputy chairman of Andy Street’s campaign, regional deputy Tory chairman, and former Labour council candidate. Stood for the Tories in Birmingham Perry Barr in 2019.
• Craig Smith – Local Tory councillor and deputy chairman of North West Leicestershire Conservatives.
• Samantha George – Deputy chairman of North Derbyshire Conservative association and Tory candidate for Chester in 2019.
• Marc Nykolyszyn – Director at a conservation group and Tory candidate for Nottingham South in 2019.
• Sidney Yankson – Wealth manager and Tory Councillor in Kensington and Chelsea.
• Laila Cunningham – Entrepreneur and Tory Councillor in Westminster.

With Bridgen getting into bust-ups in Parliament, Tory eyes are on North West Leicestershire as a prized safe seat with a majority of 20,000. Expect bitter fighting to secure the candidacy…

Yesterday Andrew Bridgen wrote an article for the Express which argued that the Tory MP Crispin Blunt, a noted Arabist and Palestinian sympathiser, claimed in a debate in 2021 that Hamas had “legitimate targets” in Israel. The article highlighted that Blunt is a paid director of the International Centre of Justice for Palestinians (ICJP), which last week tried to stop publication of accusations that Hamas had beheaded babies on the basis it would increase racism against Palestinians. Bridgen pulled no punches in his article…

Sitting at a table in Portcullis House this afternoon, Bridgen claims Crispin Blunt came out of the Adjournment restaurant after lunch and whacked him from behind on his head and shouted “You’re a bastard” before scarpering off. Bridgen says the karate chop to the head has been reported to the police. He wants an apology.

Guido has been unable to contact Crispin Blunt for comment.

Just to remind MPs of whom to curse for bringing them back to Westminster in the middle of their summer holiday – the Wise Man of the backbenches, Chris Mullin’s name will live in infamy. He made a career in the later 2000s as a ‘parliamentarian’ (one up from being ‘a good constituency MP’) by recommending September sittings in a report, and promptly resigning. Mullins Day looms large over August for every salaried Commons worker. His enormous head is shaped, by happy chance, like a dartboard. At least we have that.

MPs were brave about their dislocated vacations. Keir Starmer got a louder than usual cheer from his reshuffled party – what with the defenestrated, demoted and disappointed absenting themselves. The PM got a louder welcome again, with MPs even below the gangway rattling their order papers. They must be relieved there can’t be much more than six months more of this.

LOTO turned in his seat to shake the hand of the young man sitting behind him. He later explained that Keir Mather had won his seat by overturning the largest majority ever. It was shocking – very shocking for us reactionaries. Shaking hands in Westminster is completely out of order. It is simply not done. No one knows why it is like this, which adds to the potency of the rule. If it is a portent of an incoming Labour administration, we are all in very serious trouble.

Of course, we’re in very serious trouble already. It’s the greatest achievement of the last 13 years of Tory government, conditioning us to be used to it, when the apocalypse arrives.

Keir Starmer takes an irredeemably negative view of their success. He complained today about hospital roofs falling in on patients (it’s the single biggest cause of reduction in cancer deaths). He said children are “cowering” under steel joists in schools (we never had steel joists to cower under). He had harsh words for ‘cowboy builders’ saying that “the cowboys are running the country”. What about the speed at which cowboys work? Their ability to run five jobs at once? Their demands for payments that even lawyers envy? Without cowboy builders nothing in Britain would be built.

Keir concluded by saying that the Prime Minister’s tax rises were “for other families to pay” and “his school cuts are for other families to endure.”

He’s absolutely right. The PM literally only thinks of others.

Rishi’s responses were an object lesson in rapid response. Those who were expecting him to apologise for taking decisive action must have been disappointed by his reply. He said, quite baldly, “We make no apology for acting decisively.” He spoke most decisively, but mainly at great speed.

Two thirds of everything was fine and the 1% that wasn’t actually would be. Because professional advice had evolved over time, Labour had done nothing, and the Tories’ 20% increase in maintenance was the highest in a decade, so Labour should get their facts right instead of being needlessly expensive and excluding 80% of schools solely on the basis of ideology because we had the best readers in the western world, tripling the per pupil spend and that’s why inflation and the cost of living and the arrival of small boats was DOWN!

This was met with joyful incredulity from the benches opposite.

So, we had Sir Keir speaking for the children, a Tory speaking for pregnant dogs illegally shipped with piteously cropped ears, but who will speak for Andrew Bridgen? The squat little scrum-half of an MP has jinked his way across the House and now sits high on the wrong backbenches, having transferred his affections to the For God’s Sake Enough Is Enough wing of the Reclaim, Renew, Rebuild and Reinvent party.

The Speaker uttered the words, that the wee man most loves to hear: “Andrew Bridgen!” he cried.

The smallest party leader asked whether the PM was proud of his achievements. Rishi said he was, rather.

And that was the end of that.

Last week, Guido reported on Andrew Bridgen’s overflowing postbox – expressing concern that his constituents might not be getting the attention they deserve. Andrew, being the keen co-conspirator he is, quickly got in contact to refute the claim, blaming a stitch-up from his former Conservative Association. He also shared the content of some of his letters, which Guido is happy to publish in the interest of balance…

Bridgen has always had a fondness for letters…

With court cases, a party defection and all his campaigning efforts, it’s been a busy few months for Andrew Bridgen. This might explain why he hasn’t had the chance to check on his constituency post box, which is clearly overflowing with messages. No doubt Andrew would say it’s all his anti-vax fan mail…

Guido isn’t so sure. A local co-conspirator got in touch to share the image, expressing concern for Andrew’s constituents, as his Br-igeonhole has been filled for weeks. He claims the Leicestershire MP has “not stepped foot in there [the office] since April this year”. There is another explanation. Now he’s out of the Tory party, perhaps Andrew has just found somewhere else to put all those letters of no confidence…

UPDATE: Bridgen gets in touch to say it is the fault of the local Conservative association, and someone on the team has deliberately set him up: “The Conservative association office is in the same building… Spence has been paid by the taxpayer since April till this week but he clearly has not been collecting the post or done any other work.