May kicked off with the local elections during which Reform paced ahead, taking 30% of the vote share and winning 677 seats along with new mayors. Sarah Pochin was elected MP for Runcorn and Helsby after Mike Amesbury was turfed out for punching a constituent. The highlight of the aftermath was new mayor Andrea Jenkyns’ on-air row with Sky News…
A few days later Commons Leader Lucy Powell lit up everyone’s post-elections weekend by suggesting that discussion of rape gangs was a “dog-whistle.” The most blatant example of Powell’s inherent thickness and one for which she eventually said she was “extremely sorry“…
The UK signed a trade deal with India as a huge row broke out over Labour’s new ‘reset deal’ with the EU which saw British fishing rights sold down the river for 12 years. Also agreed was rejoining Erasmus – now enacted – and scrapping the successful Turing Scheme. Off the back of that the government was accused of pretending new “e-gate” deals across Europe were thanks to its deal. E-gate arrangements are agreed with countries and airports and have been ongoing since before Labour’s ‘reset’ arrangements were even on the horizon. Ongoing EU digitisation of its borders also renders them pointless…
Starmer held a press conference to publicly address the now-signed Chagos Surrender deal which was teeming with factual errors and downright misrepresentations like “Iran, Russia, and China are opposed to this deal.” As Guido revealed China in fact praised Mauritius for securing the deal…
Signs of tension between an extremely stubborn Treasury and panicky No10 came to the fore when Starmer’s team briefed that a U-turn on the disastrous Winter Fuel cut was on the way, a month before it actually happened. Not that it did Labour any good…
Miliband said he worries about losing his seat to Reform. David Lammy sued a French taxi driver for driving off with his and his wife’s luggage. As the government made more noises about cutting migration Emily Maitlis declared on the News Agents: ‘At least it’s Labour doing it.’ A collective groan ensued…
Honourable Mentions
Streeting Boyfriend’s Labour Comms Chief Role Downgraded Wes Streeting
Miliband Spends £33,000 on Business-Class Flights and Five-Star Beijing Hotel
Now Ofcom Launches Draconian Attempt to Ban Politicians From TV Programmes
Headline of the Month
Labour No Longer Concerned That Spending Will Cause ‘Run on the Pound’ in Raft of U-Turns
April opened with Trump’s “liberation day”. His team slapped massive tariffs on countries worldwide, with the UK bagging the lowest rate on offer at 10%. The EU, meanwhile, was whacked with 20%. Downing Street reluctantly conceded this was a Brexit win. Though die-hard Remoaners like Lammy still couldn’t bring themselves to choke out the words…
Even with that Brexit victory, the Brexiteers sent up the bat signal throughout the month as Starmer plodded onwards down his well-worn path back towards Brussels. The government prepared to accept “dynamic alignment” on a range of goods, including agrifood, and to bow to rulings from the European Court of Justice on sanitary and phytosanitary rules under the new deal. Fishing rights were lined up for surrender. May’s EU-UK summit only delivered worse news for anyone still clinging to hope…
Then came the UK steel furnace crisis, as British Steel’s Scunthorpe plant – in the hands of Chinese owner Jingye Group – threatened to shut down the last remaining UK blast furnaces. An emergency Saturday vote in Parliament was held to ram through plans for state control of what’s left of British Steel. Labour MPs congratulated themselves for “working on a Saturday”, while ministers tiptoed around any mention that this could be Chinese sabotage…
A brief glimmer of sanity arrived when the Supreme Court ruled that a woman is, in fact, a biological female – prompting various sporting bodies to ban trans women from competing in women’s sports. Obviously this triggered the usual meltdown on the left, with the BBC even offering “inclusive environment” therapy sessions for distressed staff. Despite Labour welcoming the ruling, Guido reminded co-conspirators of every single time Starmer and his frontbench couldn’t answer the simple question: “What is a woman?”…
Meanwhile, Netflix produced a perfectly watchable mini-series called Adolescence. Most people agreed it was fine, if a bit heavy-handed and preachy. In Downing Street, however, it was decided Adolescence was the best thing since Citizen Kane. Starmer insisted it be shown in schools and claimed everyone in Parliament should watch it. Apparently it would cure endemic misogyny and reboot teenagers’ brains. Weeks later Downing Street still couldn’t confirm whether Cabinet Ministers had bothered pressing play. Predictably Labour used the show to cook up more regulation; Starmer discussed a social media ban with the director, while MPs used the panic to float a new streaming tax. Any excuse for more red tape and higher taxes…
Honourable Mentions:
- Labour Tax Hikes Closing More Nurseries Than Phillipson Is Set to Open
- Rayner Explodes Labour’s Freebie ‘Security’ Excuse With Six Nations Stands Tickets
- Leadership Panic as Jenrick Adds 600 SW1 Insiders to WhatsApp Group
Headline of the Month:
Starmer-Praising Factory ‘Worker’ Is Deputy Labour Council Leader
March opened with a row over two-tier justice. Robert Jenrick spotted that new Sentencing Council guidance would require pre-sentence reports for ethnic minorities. The scandal turned into a blame game: Shabana Mahmood insisted it was all down to former Tories who’d backed the consultation, while Jenrick pointed straight at David Lammy’s own report endorsing the idea. Jenrick warned he’d intervene if Labour wouldn’t, prompting Mahmood to demand the Sentencing Council scrap the policy…
The Council immediately slapped her down. Mahmood was ultimately forced to ram through emergency legislation to kill the guidance entirely. As Guido noted at the time, the measure still managed to be in force for two hours before it was binned…
A full-on Reform row blew up after Rupert Lowe told The Mail that Nigel Farage was a “Messiah” leading a “protest party”. A day later, Reform had withdrawn the whip from Lowe, citing alleged “threats of physical violence”, and referred him to the Met Police – though the CPS later said he would not face charges. Farage vowed Lowe would “never” be allowed back…
Then came Reeves’ Spring Statement – swiftly dubbed an “emergency budget” by the Tories after the carnage of the Autumn one. Ahead of the statement, Reeves unveiled a raft of “welfare reforms” designed to shave £5 billion off the welfare bill: popular enough with voters, though Labour backbenchers were far less keen. On the morning of the statement, the OBR shifted the goalposts again – downgrading growth and dumping yet another fiscal hole in Reeves’ lap. In the Chamber she ploughed on regardless, promising welfare reforms and Whitehall spending cuts. And as co-conspirators will know, those welfare-cutting plans didn’t pan out quite as intended…
It wasn’t a great month for Starmer either. In early March, fawning hacks were still swooning over his Oval Office charm offensive with Trump at the end of February, breathlessly touting his supposed “global leadership” and even murmuring about a Falklands moment. By the end of the month, his “Coalition of the (Un)Willing” had run aground. He’s still touting that coalition as this story goes to pixel…
Honourable Mentions:
- Rayner Spent £20,000 on Flights for Ethiopia Vanity Trip
- Reynolds Finally Corrects Record After Saying He Was a ‘Solicitor’ in Commons
- Reeves Refuses to Apologise for Welfare Cut Pocket Money Analogy
Headline of the Month:
Every KC Hired by Labour to Defend Its VAT Policy Went to Private School
February remained frosty for Starmer, with the month kicking off with VoiceCoachGate. Starmer was revealed to have met his personal voice coach Leonie Mellinger in person on Christmas Eve 2020, during Tier 4 lockdown… despite her claiming she was only working remotely at the time. Guido also revealed that Starmer had founded and run a death-penalty charity with Mellinger’s husband. When asked whether he followed all Covid rules, Starmer refused to say yes…
For Labour, one scandal per month is never enough: Guido exposed yet another Labour cabinet minister whose CV didn’t quite match reality. Then-Business Secretary Jonathan Reynolds wasn’t actually a solicitor, despite having claimed the title in Parliament. He was only ever a trainee. He quietly edited his LinkedIn page and eventually corrected the record a month later…
Then came Rachel Reeves, who found herself in an unflattering BBC story alleging she’d once been caught up in an HBOS expenses probe featuring eyebrow-raising claims like handbags and perfume. Her spokesman denied any controversy. Which always inspires confidence…
Starmer rounded off the month by announcing defence spending would rise to 2.5% of GDP by 2027, funded by slicing foreign aid from 0.5% to 0.3%. Leftie Labour MPs howled accordingly. Anneliese Dodds even resigned as International Development Minister in protest. Guido helpfully provided a long list of where Labour could start cutting wasteful spending…
Speaking of spending, Pat McFadden boldly declared he’d “freeze” all taxpayer credit cards. Co-conspirators will have noticed that didn’t happen “immediately”. Spending actually rose across the Home Office, the Cabinet Office, and most other departments…
In the States, Volodymyr Zelenskyy’s first trip to Washington since Trump returned to power took an ugly turn. Their confrontation in the Oval Office would become one of the most notorious political catfights of the year, with all of it unravelling in front of the world’s press. They’d patch things up, at least publicly, in the months ahead. But with no real progress on the ground…
Over in Toryland, Kemi Badenoch summoned her CCHQ staff for a pep talk after 100 days in LOTO. Her message was clear: “pull your weight or leave”. Staff were reminded they had exactly “two jobs: campaigning and fundraising. If you’re not doing something to make either of those happen, you’re not doing your job right”. The ‘come to Jesus’ moment upset a few staff. Another wave of redundancies rolled in…
Meanwhile Reform hit first place in a YouGov poll for the first time. And they’ve pretty much stayed there since…
Honourable Mentions:
- Full Gwynne Group Chat Leaked: ‘Drag Queen’ Thornberry and Rayner a ‘Waste of Time’
- Starmer Summons Cabinet for Secret Lancaster House Away Day
- Tony Blair Institute Shreds Red Ed’s Net Zero Growth Promises
Headline of the Month:
IN FULL: Labour’s Long List of Sleaze and Scandal Since Coming to Office
The political year opened with a fresh migraine for Starmer: Guido was the first UK outlet to reveal that the Bangladeshi government was investigating Labour’s anti-corruption minister Tulip Siddiq over embezzlement claims following the ousting of her despot aunt. Guido then exposed that Starmer had met the Awami League multiple times, including as recently as December. Tulip was pushed into referring herself to the Standards Commissioner. She promptly resigned…
Guido then sat down with Bobby Hajjaj, the Bangladeshi politician who filed the original complaint against Siddiq. He warned she could be extradited to face the courts. She’s now been sentenced to two years in jail in absentia…
Meanwhile, another crisis detonated under Starmer as Elon Musk weighed in on the rape gangs scandal following forensic reporting by GB News’ Charlie Peters. Labour flat-out refused to open a national inquiry. Guido logged every excuse they deployed, including Starmer claiming it was “jumping on a bandwagon” and “amplifying what the far-right is saying” for attention. Yvette Cooper eventually announced five token “local inquiries” into rape gangs. That row rumbled on throughout the year…
Across the pond, Donald Trump was sworn in as the 47th President of the United States. He signed more than 200 executive orders on his first day as President, including abolishing the Green New Deal policy, suspending DEI hiring practices in the federal government and declaring a state of emergency on the border, with a proclamation to close it. Most of what Starmer managed in 100 days was losing his Chief of Staff Sue Gray…
Mid-January, Starmer hastily called a press conference over the Southport murderer, Axel Rudakubana, the day before he was sentenced to a minimum of 52 years in prison. The PM admitted he was updated on Rudakubana “immediately as information became available,” yet insisted “it was not my personal decision to withhold information.” He still couldn’t explain why the public had been kept in the dark. Nigel Farage branded it the “worst cover-up” ever. Guido reminded co-conspirators of all the times Starmer was remarkably quick to label past incidents “terror” when it suited him…
It wasn’t any better for Rachel Reeves. Long-term borrowing costs reached to their highest levels since 1998. That picture only got uglier as the year rolled on…
Honourable Mentions:
- Rayner Caught Using Civil Servants to Help Move House
- Labour Cuts £17 Million From Maths Support Programme on Same Day as Handing £17 Million to UNRWA
- Taxpayer Forks Out £11,000 an Hour for Starmer’s Private Jet Flights Over First Three Months in Office
Headline of the Month:
More happy news on Guido Fawkes day. More in Common has done some obligatory polling…
Guido is more positively viewed than all party leaders. In fact, he’s the only one with a positive rating. You lot could learn a thing or two…
Remember, remember the Fifth of November – it is 420 years since Guido last attempted to overturn a corrupt, liberty-taking political class. Supporters of the mission can sign up here…
Red Wall Labour backbencher Jonathan Brash told GB News that Starmer should resign:
“I’m completely fed up about it, and I think it’s got to the point now where I genuinely think that, as far as the Prime Minister is concerned, it’s not a case of if, it’s when.”
