February 20th, 2013

Happy Birthday Gordon

Best wishes to the Prime Mentalist as he turns 62 today. Twelve months without speaking in Parliament, £6,000 and more on air fares at our expense, £300,000-a-month in cash that is definitely not paid to him, an attendance record to be ashamed of, landing his successor in it, not to mention the worst of omens for His Holiness.

And that’s forgetting Gordon’s Olympic nightmare and his – shall we say – awkwardness at the Leveson Inquiry. To celebrate, why not enjoy his greatest hits one more time…


  1. 1
    Tuscan Tony says:

    He’s a good socialist.

  2. 2
    Gordon Brown says:

    I Hope I get a Muffin The Mule from mummy Ashton, she did promise.

  3. 3
    Pollytwaddle says:

    Come off it, Guido.

    Be grateful he’s not doing any damage!

  4. 4
    The Fifty Seventh Earl of Perineum says:

    Are we all suffering from a weird mutant form of Munchausen by proxy syndrome, though?

  5. 5
    SP4BS says:

    The whole curse business makes you sound a bit like a medieaval peasant. but then, so does following the pope.

  6. 6
    Brown never existed -- it was merely a nightmare says:

    Unfortunately the U.K. suffered badly because of the incompetence and malevolence of this deluded nutter.

    Instead of giving him endless publicity about his troughing idleness, he should be consigned to oblivion. Air brushed out of existence in the best Soviet tradition.

    Just ignore the fucker completely and move on.

  7. 7
    Paddy Briggs says:

    Not your finest hour Guido. Churlish. Bitter. Wrong

  8. 8
    Gordon McRuin (age 62) says:

    I’ve stuck some candles in my plip-plops but nurse won’t give me any matches. :(

  9. 9
    Owen Jones says:

    Gord did a much better job as Prime Minister than the present”one term” Prime Minister,David Cameron.

    Happy Birthday,Gord.

  10. 10
    Useless Dave says:

    Hi Spaddy. What photo ops. are there today? I’ve done being bowled out, and got the Duchess of Cambridge’s title wrong these last two days. What can I mess up today?

  11. 11
    rebekah aka nellnewman says:

    Indeed he did a much better of trashing the economy, ruining the country, stealing people’s pensions and taxing everything that moved. gordon will never be bettered that is a certainty .

  12. 12
    Confucius says:

    Turds are Brown. Therefore Brown is a turd.

  13. 13
    Anonymous says:

    Unlike Blair or Cameron he is an honest decent man. He made mistakes and he was forced to do thinks he didn’t believe in but he didn’t to that to enrich himself, his family or friends.

  14. 14
    WVM says:

    At least McMental believed in his failed ideology, no matter how warped, retarded & misguided.

    Cameron believes in nothing but “being” Prime Minister – & it ain’t half showing now.

    If Sahmeron could not win against a nutter like Brown last time, how on earth does he think he can win now the country has seen him fail & fail & fail again?

    Vote Ukip.

  15. 15
    Confucius says:

    Mark II for sensitive Moddybot.

    Excrement is Brown. Brown is excrement

  16. 16
    AntiLeftoid says:

    Haha.. look at ickle Owen defending his gweat big hewo.. Brown was an incompetent ass.. go back to writing you Chamsoc drivel Mr Jones.

  17. 17
    Disaster Dave says:

    Be patient. I am am doing my best to continue the ruination of the economy.

  18. 18
    Anonymous says:

    It’s all he has to give.

  19. 19
    Is that you Gordon? says:

    Total bollocks.

  20. 20
    Residing in 96.99% white Merseyside says:

    I prefer to remember him in the days he was like Uncle Joe and not when he was Mr Bean.

  21. 21
    Axe The Telly Tax says:

    If it’s Brown flush it down.

  22. 22
    John O'Farrell M.P. says:

    GiveGideon Gerge Oliver Osborne a break, what does a £1bn shortfall on 4G matter? He already has us borrowing £64bn more than planned

  23. 23
    Ma­qboul says:

    Unlike wishing the IRA to have killed him. That ain’t childish.

  24. 24
    Ma­qboul says:

    Fuck UKIP

  25. 25

    Why do none of the thieving parasites raise this issue of his continued absence , with parliamentary standards or even the fraud squad ?
    Is it because they see this as normal behaviour ?

  26. 26
    Ma­qboul says:

    Shhh, don’t mention half the nation’s gold reserves he gifted to the banksters.

  27. 27
    Brent Fraser says:

    Thanks very much, Guido, for the latest instalment of the Gordon Brown Fan Club newsletter!

  28. 28
    anon. says:

    So there you have it.

  29. 29
    The Fifty Seventh Earl of Perineum says:

    Why gripe about Guido not having his finest hour when Gordon has had tens of thousands of such blatherskite periods?

  30. 30
    Steve Miliband says:

    He was a power crazy, self centred, obsessive maniac who’s whole aim in life was to become PM. When Blair beat him to it he festered in his own world of angst and turmoil, positioning himself to take over. Everything he did was calculated to get him into No10. He spent tax payers money at will to get as many people to vote Labour as possible.

    We will be paying for his narcissism for the next generation. However bad governments are, just remember Gordon Brown’s. Don’t let it happen again.

  31. 31
    aussie rules says:

    I saw McMentalist in Dubai Airporty last Tuesday evening looking like a bag of shit in a tie in searing heat,he had been addressing that bastion of freedom and democracy the Dubai Forum no doubt for a fat fee.The people to blame are the fukcwits in Cowdenbeath who elected him and are unprepared to rid themselves of this loony parasite.Theres a saying that citezens get the politicians they deserve no doub thats why the UK is such a shithole

  32. 32
  33. 33
    Ed and Ed says:

    Wow! Look what we’ve got to look forward to. The pigs walk on their hind legs.

  34. 34
    Ma­qboul says:

    You must believe in the fucking fairies as well. The guy was a bully, a liar and a narcissic twat. The only thing he cared about was Gordon.

    We should not be paying for this parasite’s wages.

  35. 35
    Pappa Ratzburger says:

    Tony. I’ve only a got few days left if you want that beatification job done that you’ve paid for. Don’t forget I have to have your corpse available first.

  36. 36
    Tuscan Tony says:

    He wasn’t decent enough to self-assess though, if he’d been more honest he’d have realised how manifestly unsuited he was to the position to which he aspired.

    As for the enrichment, you do know about his extensive property portfolio I presume? And his MPs salary and generous expenses, received and claimed for a role he really doesn’t seem to be fulfiling?

  37. 37
    Mrs Jones says:

    Surely it’s a school day, Owen. Have you packed your satchel yet?

  38. 38
    Synic says:

    She’s still trying to find some guy to give her the stuffing

  39. 39
    Residing in 96.99% white Merseyside says:

    Don’t blame Gordo, it was the *ankers wot caused it.

  40. 40
    Residing in 96.99% white Merseyside says:

    I don’t remember seeing much of the Rt. Hon. and Noble Lady in the House after she was quite rightly given the heave ho.

  41. 41
    John O'Farrell M.P. says:

    With no mandate, having hidden his health policy, Cameron abolishes NHS, which when he came in had highest ever public satisfaction rating.

  42. 42
    T'Old Fella says:

    Another chancellor aims high and disappoints by missing his G4 auction by over a Billion 4G http://www.guardian.co.uk/business/2013/feb/20/4g-mobile-broadband-auction-treasury, for all Gordy’s faults, and there are many, you cannot blame him for that Geedo

  43. 43
    SP4BS says:

    1st sentence shoud read “he wanted to be PM”.

  44. 44
    Gordon Brown says:

    fuck off while I count my Toblerones

  45. 45
    Liver Bird says:

    At least that’s what the wonderfull Sun newspaper said.

  46. 46
    The Brown Legacy.. says:

    A trashed country; a trashed economy; an impoverished people ; future generations burdened by debt

  47. 47
    Ay Dolt says:

    Err, vote for the LabLibCon party of socialist traitors.

  48. 48
    AntiLeftoid says:

    Oh dear, where do these idiots come from?

  49. 49
    Native says:

    On balance I’d rather fuck UKIP than be fucked by the LibLabCon, but I know that’s not what the ponces from over seas would want.

  50. 50
    WVM says:

    Keep voting for Brownonomic fiscal insanity then you muppet.

  51. 51
    A Doctor says:

    You would, however the delusional fantasy will wear off, if you get urgent psychiatric help.

  52. 52
    WVM says:

    The vast majority of racist attacks in Britain are against white people because they are white. Fact.

  53. 53
    T'Old Fella says:

    You know does anyone know of anyone of note or claim to “fame” other than Farrage, is it a one man leader and a host of assistants?

  54. 54
    A Doctor says:

    You don’t remember full stop.

  55. 55

    I wish him nothing but Pain , Suffering , Misery and a slow painful death

  56. 56
    A Doctor says:

    Around 85% actually.

  57. 57
    T'Old Fella says:

    Well Dodgy Dave went to Oxford didn’t he?

  58. 58
    rebekah aka nellnewman says:

    ++++Laugh+++++ “nhs had highest rates of customer satisfaction” ??!!

    Try using it on a regular basis and then see if you can still say that without feeling an idiot.

    You’re living on another planet from the rest of us who have to fight the nhs to get timely and appropriate treatment.

  59. 59
    Bollocks to getting a pseudonym says:

    “Who’s whole aim” should be “whose whole aim”. Try using a dictionary.

  60. 60
    T'Old Fella says:

    And are still doing it by all accounts

  61. 61
    rebekah aka nellnewman says:

    Well I don’t wish to be an O’Farrell who seems to glory in other peoples death and illness.

    I would much rather he did the honourable thing and resigned his mp’s position so saving us the cost of paying him for doing nothing.

    But I think we’ve all long since learned that gordon does not have a decent honourable bone in his body. Its part of labours dna.

  62. 62
    Bollocks to getting a pseudonym says:

    Not to mention being an Anglophobic racist and an uncontrollable thug.

  63. 63
    Young's beer says:

    Typical socialist, want’s somebody to do the work for him. Go and look them up yourself.

  64. 64

    Osborne is a bigger wanker than Brown

  65. 65
    SP4BS says:

    that guy that likes to smoke in the pub?

  66. 66
    AntiLeftoid says:

    It angers me so much, I bet they never go near the areas where white people are intimidated by gangs of young Asian men shouting racist abuse and threatening violence.

  67. 67
    (I don't need no doctor) says:

    I wish Gordon Brown all the worst for many years to come. The most useless PM ever, a liar, a coward, and a cheat. A truly evil piece of work.

  68. 68
    A Doctor says:

    The ‘hidden health policy’ you yap about John, is not so hidden as well you know.

    The coalition are merely implementing instructions given to them from elsewhere, just as Labour would have, if they had won in 2010.

    Something the cowardly Labour party and it’s useless cowardly MP’s, will not talk about.

  69. 69
    Evil Landlord says:

    It’s half term this week.

  70. 70
    (I don't need no doctor) says:

    Ask the relatives of those that died at Stafford Hospital. O’Farrell is the same has Burnham, a coward with no morals.

  71. 71
    but, but, but says:

    a mountain of coal floating on an ocean of oil surrounded by a sea full of fish so why the energy shortage ?

  72. 72
    T'Old Fella says:

    Paddy tha’s got t’ play t’crowd lad, Geedo’s got his crowd so that is what he does, and gets a pat on the head from Rupy

  73. 73
  74. 74
    Anonymous says:

    Even the Labour upper politburo knew he was a barm pot bully and totally unsuitable to lead their party let alone the nation. The one act that Tony could have done to redeem some of the damage he had done was to have knifed McRuin in the back and made the Labour party have a proper leadership contest. That he did not just proves what self serving c_nt he is as well. The Blair/Brown Bubble years will go down as the worst peace time government in living memory

  75. 75
    Labour Treason says:

    Is it possible he could do any more than he already has!!!!!

  76. 76
    Anonymous says:

    Gordon Brown shows all the signs of being on the Autistic spectrum.

  77. 77
    Gordon Brown says:

    I am looking at generating addition revenue with a vending machine

    A vending machine provides access to drinks and snacks 24 hours a day at the push of a button.

    Vending machines can offer a great way to generate additional revenue, or simply to easily keep your staff fuelled throughout their working day.

    Are you interested in a vending machine?

  78. 78
    A Doctor says:

    Not much between them actually. Brown was a deluded maniac who believed his own manufactured story. Osborne is simply an inadequate, who takes his instructions from even less adequate sources, just like his boss.

  79. 79

    Unemployment fell by 14,000 in the three months to December
    What a load of bollocks
    What it means in real terms is that all these companies set up at tax payers expense to get people off the dole , have yet again cooked the books , thus getting their enormous bonuses for hiding the truth from us
    a prime example was reported yesterday
    Costa coffee to open a new shop in Nottingham 1500 people applied for three full time and 5 part time jobs
    way to many people working a few hours and living on big benefits to make up the rest

  80. 80
    SP4BS says:

    rubbish. he’s never even been to a star trek convention.

  81. 81
    Gordon Brown says:

    Owen Jones is a white middle class fuckwitt

  82. 82

    Look at the fuckin state of this , This ******** with eleven kids which she cannot ever have hoped to support to get a £400,000 house built for her


  83. 83
    T'Old Fella says:

    To be fair Gordy was reliant on his advisers, true he made the final decisions, but he is like a computer rubbish in, rubbish out. Gideon seems to have the same sort of problem with advisers, he like Gordy had no first hand economics training, so is reliant on his advisors feeding him with the right information.

  84. 84

    I’d just like to wish the Buffty frae Kirkcaldy a happy birthday.
    May it be his last one!

  85. 85
    T'Old Fella says:

    RC of convenience shall we say.

  86. 86
    AntiLeftoid says:

    The sooner we cut ties with Brusselingrad the better.

  87. 87
    nmj says:

    The only good one is a dead one; he’s still breathing.

  88. 88
    T'Old Fella says:

    Anon, could be, he seemed uncomfortable in company and his single mindedness and obessiveness, austism also shaped Einstien and many other famous people, the trouble with Gordy it just went badly wrong on his watch, he relaxed controls because the bankers said they could make more money by not sticking to well established lending rules besides the US was letting things rip

  89. 89
    Plug says:

    Rupy was Gordo’s friend wasn’t he? Anyway, there is a story yet to be told about when the Labour leadership realised that the man was unstable, and why they allowed him to take power and do the damage that he did.

  90. 90
    My boomerang won't come back says:

    Which has sharper edges – a dictionary or a Nokia ?

  91. 91
    P l e b says:

    Somebody get Gidiot a new fag packet, he’s obviously run out of space on the back of the one he’s using now..

  92. 92
    Dirge says:

    Perhaps Boy George should have asked Gordon Brown how to organise an auction.

    Brown managed to squeeze 10 times the amount of cash from the mobile companies with his great, clunking fist as Boy has managed.

    Boy’s great idea, the Office for Budget Responsibility, has excelled itself again. I have just been listening to John Redwood on Radio 4, beamed in from Pluto or somewhere, opining that the OBR has been an unmitigated disaster having continuously overestimated both economic growth and tax revenues.

    With friends like these…

  93. 93
    My pension won't come back says:

    Air brushed out of existence … ? No, the history books must tell the truth as a warning to future generations.

  94. 94
    Di o'Rhea says:

    Is this a running joke ?

  95. 95
    National Socialist says:

    Oh! Dear Tories, has your chancellor of simple sums let you down again? Never mind come 2015 you won’t have this embarrassment any more

  96. 96
    Di o'Rhea says:

    Our democracy has been totally subverted by crooks like Brown; that’s why the UK is now such a shithole.

  97. 97
    Piano wire says:

    Why this idiiot remains unhung is a mystery to many of us. Selling the gold, for example, was surely an act of treason.

  98. 98
    Sir Mary Flappes says:

    I have seen more capable root vegetables than McMental. Perhaps vivisection might find a use for the incontinent manser?

  99. 99
    Anonymous says:

    The world would have been a better place if he’d never been born.

  100. 100
    Well, you did ask says:

    That’s because, according to what we read yesterday, most of them are still hardly out of nappies. Gideon needs to get people with proper experience of life in his team and get rid of all these still wet behind the ears know-alls.

  101. 101
    Well, you did ask says:

    yes, but only to pick up a pizza

  102. 102
    Well, you did ask says:

    My passport application to visit Tower Hamlets and Luton was refused.

  103. 103
    Happy crappy nappies R Us says:

    Don’t blab so much or we will lose the contract to supply all the spads’ nappy quotas.

  104. 104
    Coffee costa bomb these days says:

    Were you in the queue too?

  105. 105
    Jilted John says:

    Gordon is a moron.

  106. 106
    Catty Comment (Ms) says:

    JR is one of the very few parliamentarians that actually understand what ‘economics’ means…

    … which explains why Dave will never have him as Chancellor.

  107. 107
    Catty Comment (Ms) says:

    “Unhanged” – but we know what you mean.

  108. 108
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Either Rupee lied on oath or Gordo lied on oath or both of them lied on oath … watch the plod follow up the liars the perjurors like wot the did Archer … or will the pair of liars get the old blind eye medicine?

  109. 109
    Catty Comment (Ms) says:

    “Politics” – one of the dirtiest words in the dictionary.

  110. 110
    Residing in 96.99% white Merseyside says:

    Don’t tell me, you practice at the Mid Staffs.

  111. 111
    Postal Votes are Labour Loo Paper says:

    What planet are you on sunshine? The man is total ahole.

  112. 112
    Postal Votes are Labour Loo Paper says:

    Are you off your meds again?

  113. 113
    Residing in 96.99% white Merseyside says:

    At least when Mr Brown was Chancellor we went through a purple patch up our way.

  114. 114
    Pollytwaddle says:

    Good point.

    I fear we’ll find out in 2015…

  115. 115
    Residing in 96.99% white Merseyside says:

    I don’t feel impoverished what with my pensions, benefits and compensation.

  116. 116
    Postal Votes are Labour Loo Paper says:

    Comprehensive schools

  117. 117
    galloping trotts says:

    Not when the khazi is occupied

  118. 118
    Postal Votes are Labour Loo Paper says:

    Been to Mid Staffs lately? No, thought not.

  119. 119
    Postal Votes are Labour Loo Paper says:

    Hard to imagine sonny.

  120. 120
    Next Stop North Korea says:

    Lets hear it for the man who wanted to turn the country into a giant client State !

  121. 121
    Residing in 96.99% white Merseyside says:

    I tried watching him in some film about Alexander the Great but after about 10 mins thought this is absolutely dreadful and switched off.

  122. 122
    Residing in 96.99% white Merseyside says:

    Then he’s in good company in the HOC!

    When he attends that is.

  123. 123
    Residing in 96.99% white Merseyside says:

    Yes, all those billions. I think I associate Mr Brown with that more than anything.

  124. 124
    cat funt says:

    I thought merseyside was 50% red.

    Sorry. 100% Hunt I mean

  125. 125
    Residing in 96.99% white Merseyside says:

    I never remember him selling the gold so I don’t grieve about it.

  126. 126
    AntiLeftoid says:

    You need a Halal passport.

  127. 127
    Residing in 96.99% white Merseyside says:

    Ditto, if you go back 3 PM’s before him!

  128. 128
    timmy tinycock says:

    No, he was right first time

  129. 129
    Fishy says:

    If Earl Perineum #57 posted that as a joke, I don’t think he realised how close he was to the truth.

  130. 130
    Ethel Merman says:

    Whatever happened to logic and common sense?

    These people are nasty, self obsessed and just plain wrong.

    As many psychiatrists are keen to point out – Socialism is a psychological disorder.

    And these idiots like Jones prove this beautifully.

    Idiots shouldn’t be allowed near a computer because it just empowers them.

  131. 131
    Ethel Merman says:

    Couldn’t agree more.

    Sadly, it seems as though the blue marxist Cameron has jumped on the socialist bandwagon and is continuing the destruction started by Blair and Brown.

  132. 132
    Jimmy says:

    Can’t you just be happy about his honest and competent successor?


  133. 133
    Dear "Prudence" says:

    … we want our money back.

  134. 134
    keredybretsa says:

    He’s living a Alzheimer Free Zone!

  135. 135
    Tony Baliar says:

    Does socialist equate to total tosser?.

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