May 9th, 2011

Huhne Redux

We give you the car that is literally full of waste and from the DECC intranet page, advice to Huhne’s civil servants to note:

The Secretary of State’s box closes at 3pm on Monday to Thursday with no box on Friday. We cannot guarantee that submissions received after this time will enter the box. For guidance on submissions, please refer to the relevant intranet page .

Saving energy means no work for Huhne on a Friday, Saturday or Sunday it seems…


262 Comments

  1. 1
    Lord Bowden of Middlesex says:

    Is he the one with a super injuction then ? and does play away?

    • 11
      Anonymous says:

      Or takes a dildo up the harris?

      • 35
        “If you don’t want to be on the front pages then don’t pay spads to stick dildos up your bum.” says:

        • 39
          Lord Bowden of Middlesex says:

          Wow , that has never been posted on here before………..

          • QWERTY says:

            Wow , you’ve never posted that on here before Billy Bumblefuck………..

          • URFunnee says:

            Its u init?
            I luv it wen u post thiz.
            It iz funnee.
            Make me larf much.

            i thinq you should be on the TV coz u are so funee and i could see wat u look lik.

            I hope u will be posying all nite like youshal.
            io will be watching for your funnies.

            ur fan.

          • Mandy says:

            Well, it might not have actually been posted before but…

          • Bowden is a tosser says:

            Bowden, you are a complete and utter tosser. Please please please fuck off and die. You have even taken to making up other names to respond to people complaining about what a tosser you.

          • Lord Wayne of Trombone says:

            i honestly think all those posting above are either of low intelligence or like to play the pink piccolo.

        • 49
          AC1 says:

          You could post that on your blog…

        • 159
          Chris Bryant says:

          My box is always open to anyone who wants it.

          • vote no to av,vote no to sandal wearers says:

            No your too generous chris,please be selfish,please,please

    • 15
      Black Crime says:

      A MAN who violently mugged two women in the borough has been ordered to undergo drug treatment but has escaped a jail sentence.

      Unemployed Darren Robinson, 35, targeted the pedestrians in broad daylight during a weekend in September last year.

      http://www.thisislocallondon.co.uk/whereilive/localheadlines/9016287.WALTHAM_FOREST__Mugger_ordered_to_undergo_drug_treatment

      • 19
        The Guardian says:

        He was exercising his right to lead the life he chooses.

      • 23
        Anonymous 2 says:

        Not one mention of a dildo!!

      • 30
        Ken Clarke, the criminals friend, says:

        He’s just a little scamp! Of course he shouldn’t be in prison! No-one should.

        Chortle Chortle.

      • 84
        Crikey says:

        “Drug treatment” eh? Well that will show him the error of his ways.

        Find yourself before the beak just say you have a drug problem. Most defence solicitors will have the appropriate pro forma for you to complete and if necessary a helpful doc. to lend support.

        • 160
          Anonymous says:

          If you put a drug using criminal in prison you don’t really solve the problem, so it becomes a vicious cycle, or expensive prison, drugs, crime, prison… Perhaps your being a little bit narrow minded.

          • Nail Some Sense Into Them says:

            Three strikes and you’re out – death penalty

            Nice n cheap

            Prison works – if you’ll let it…

          • MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

            That is the problem with this country !
            Too many soft arsed do gooders like you , you twat !
            once one of these fuckers rapes your mother you might be in favour of a short sentence !

          • Titford Hat says:

            If someone is in prison he can’t burgle your house or mug you.

      • 89
        More Black Crime says:

        Man shot dead in Shepherd’s Bush, west London

        It is expected that the force’s Trident unit, which investigates shootings in London’s criminal black communities, will investigate.

        http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-13340420

        • 125
          Ron Atkinson says:

          Fucking lazy thick n*ggers

        • 176
          jgm2 says:

          Love it. ‘A post-mortem will be held…’

          C*unt gets shot and they hold a post-mortem.

          I’m betting he died of gunshot wounds.

        • 197
          ?????? says:

          Nothing wrong with shooting black men, in fact I can recommend it, did it 30 plus years ago in southern Africa, and feel it is missing in my life at present.

          • The Paragnostic says:

            I once had a very ‘right on’ friend who kept a Rhodesian ridgeback as a pet.

            He was crestfallen when I told him they were bred for chasing n*ggers – I still don’t know if that’s true, but it was worth it just for the look on the smug c’unt’s face.

          • Jabba the Cat says:

            Jou doel was nie so goed en dan as daar te veel flip flops nog leef?

          • Titford Hat says:

            Rhodesian Ridgebacks were bred for hunting lions. Not sure what colour lions.

        • 228
          Even More Black Crime says:

          Fifth teenager charged over Peckham 17-year-old murder

          http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-13340507

      • 105
        Ken ( 'pond life' ) Livingscum says:

        CELEBRATE THE RICH MULTICULTURAL DIVERSITY !!!

    • 29
      As fast as shit off a shovel. says:

      Huhne’s shit powered Car seems quite apt for someone so full of shit.

      “The ‘Dung Beetle’ – a converted Volkswagen – can use the gas generated from a year’s worth of human excrement to travel 10,000 miles.

      It is reported that the fart-powered four wheeler can blow the competition off the road – and earn you an automatic ban – by hitting a trouser scorching 114 mph”
      http://www.eastleighnews.org.uk/news/2011/05/08/huhne-in-driving-allegations/

      • 60
        sockpuppet #4 says:

        Strikes me as a bit of a greenwash.

        A methane powered car is useful for various more practical reasons – a bit like LPG its an unusual road fuel that could come in handy. I wonder if british gas paid for the research.

        I’d bet if there were such cars, the fuel would probably come from conventional fossil fuel sources.

        • 66
          The Paragnostic says:

          Wood gas powered vehicles are already feasible – the only problem is the large distillation vessel needed to produce sufficient gas for the car.

          With more efficient xylases and cellulases, a small digester and fermenter set up could produce enough ethanol from fast growing wood like coppiced hazel or willow to run a family car on about 1/2 an acre of land, but we’ve let that many migrants in that there isn’t enough land for us to grow the fuel we need…

          • sockpuppet #4 says:

            Wood gas? I’d not describe that as distillation. but anyway.
            Trouble with a digester and fermenter is you’ve got to distill the 88% water off the 12% alcohol.

            And it sounds a bit like that “make gas from vacant lots” loony that was on youtube many months ago.

            One would be better off burning woody stuff it in a fire.

          • The Paragnostic says:

            If you use a heat pump on the digester, you can get most of the energy for the distillation step for free.

            I’m pretty sure the driving off of wood gas from wood is distillation – just a very crude form.

            No clever retorts, please…

          • “No clever retorts, please…”

            You bastard, I just had a reverse nasal event on the keyboard.

          • Anonymous says:

            Only thing is shit and veggy gas cars were available during WW2. Once oil became widely available again then they went by the wayside as being too expensive.

          • C Lark Sun says:

            How many mile to the poop?

          • sockpuppet #4 says:

            If you use a heat pump on the digester:
            You aren’t going to boil water with a heat pump. They will have an efficiency of sod all with the temperature differences you are suggesting.

            “I’m pretty sure the driving off of wood gas from wood is distillation” Nope, just looked it up. its CO and H2

            Science lesson over.
            You’re sounding a lot more like the “gas from vacant lots” bloke.

          • The Paragnostic says:

            You don’t need to boil the water to get the alcohol out – just heat it to 90°C or so. The digester can reach 70° or more, so could at the very least preheat the fermented liquor to save on energy.

            You’re spot on about the wood gas – it’s a bit more complex than I thought (last time I did it was about 40 years ago in a flour tin, so give an old man a break…). Good job I didn’t do chemistry past O-level really…

        • 67
          P. Doff says:

          One of the motoring mag editors had a test drive in the Dung-Beetle… it went so fast he shit himself… which of course made it go even faster!

        • 232
          That's News says:

          I knew someone who had an LPG powered-taxi. Utterly useless as a taxi. The boot was filled with a bloody huge LPG tank, so no room for any luggage or shopping!

          Also, (o/t) did the government try to blow up the Radio Caroline ship?
          http://thatsbooks.blogspot.com/2011/05/ship-that-rocked-world.html

        • 238
          Call me Infidel says:

          If the digester reaches 70C how do the bacteria survive? Are they some exotic species harvested from “black smokers?”

          • Old fart says:

            All i can say is that i have never had a problem converting solids and liquids into gas

  2. 2
    Anonymous says:

    Could he just be in his consitutency on a Friday and therefore not there to collect box…?

    • 18
      alles ist nicht klar says:

      Not wanting to sound a complete idiot.. but what does this blog mean? Is it good or bad?

    • 26
      Andrew says:

      That’s what weekends are for when you are a Minister. Idle bugger.

    • 33
      The Paragnostic says:

      He’s just getting into practice for when his disastrous ‘Green’ energy plans lead us all to the glorious sunny uplands of a 4 day week.

      I remember the 3 day weeks of the early 70s – power cuts and candles. Luckily we had a coal fire and a coal fuelled kitchen range at the time, but most people use electric these days, so unless Huhne pulls his finger out and builds some new generating plant soon, we’re all fucked.

      • 142
        Accidental Rapist says:

        It’s alright, we’ll start by burning the Welsh, moving onto the filthy Jockos when necessary.

      • 260
        Titford Hat says:

        I’ve got a woodburner you can get five saucepans on. It’d be a bit hot in the summer, though.

    • 243
      Sir William Waad says:

      Has he heard of “e-mail”?

  3. 3
    Marquis De Sade says:

    @No Billy. It is Mickey Handicapcock.

  4. 4
    Lord Bowden of Middlesex says:

    Then again, Am i alone in thinking that ministers doing less is a good thing?

    Lets not forget the hyper-activity that Labour had for passing bills, Most not even getting checked propley by the Commons and it being left up to the Lords(Who done quite a good job), Maybe if minsters took thier time and parliament done its job of holding the executive to account we would not have had so many badly drafted and ill-thought out laws.

    Anyway Hunt is in charge of “Global warming/climate change scam” so if he isnt doing much then he aint taxing us and wasting money.

    Oh i still think he is a first class Hunt tho.

    • 12
      Anonymostly says:

      Dave tells me that he can assist Chris with his work-load ..by sacking him

      • 27
        I want to sodomise Priti Patel says:

        I believe Carina Trimingham regularly helps Chris with whatever load he has ready for her. Work, or whatever else comes to hand.

    • 32

      I assure you that I am doing my utmost to do as little work in government as possible.
      I too find it is much better for the country if MPs don’t try and do or say anything much at all.

      I have found that over the last 25 years this has allowed me to serve the community, get paid bundles, start a property portfolio and improve my golf handicap to 14, all without having to give up my real job.

      • 64
        Grumpy Old Man says:

        Out of interest, as an MP what, exactly, is your real job?

        • 144

          I’m not sure really. Some sort of consultant to something. or maybe a taxi driver.
          All I know is chaps pay me £5k an hour to support their plans in government.

          The beauty is no one takes any notice of backbenchers so it really doesn’t matter what I say.

        • 145
          Accidental Rapist says:

          Spending your cash – lovely

      • 117
        Southern Softy says:

        The trouble with Huhne is that he does very little, but says a lot.
        Oh, and a four day week is essential as he is always worn out from the vacations.
        Three weeks at Easter and another two to take at Whitsun.
        Gawd knows that would tire anyone out.

  5. 5
    Popeye says:

    Idle bastard, and I pay taxes for this bum!

  6. 6
    Carine Trim Ming Ham says:

    He can enter my box anytime.

  7. 7
    Anonymous says:

    I like you Guido, but this is a fucking stupid blog post.

    • 262
      Consumit says:

      Agree. This is how all ministers operate. The box closing time is there for his private office to print off submissions, make any comments, put into order of priority before physically handing him a box (or possibly several boxes). He is also a constituency MP and probably does a lot of constituency work on Friday and Saturday.

  8. 9
    Tommy says:

    Guido’s really got it in for Huhne… you’d almost think he had a reasonable sum of money on him being the next to exit the Cabinet and was worried that Lansley might pip him there first!

    • 119
      Southern Softy says:

      Time for a reshuffle, if Dave’s got the guts.
      Cable first, please.
      He can take himself off to Liebour and snipe from there.

  9. 10
    Bled White Taxpayer says:

    No hurry to meet those rather far-fetched 20% of energy from renewables targets by 2020, then. Clearly, a 4 day week is what it takes, and there’s more than enough time for the Minister to run a mistress and a campaign to undermine his party leader.

    Stupid targets that will never be met, overwhelming ambition, underwhelming talent, a taste for duplicity, and now it appears a willingness to drop his advisors in the doo-doo. I very much hope that he fails in every endeavour.

    • 13
      Bled White Taxpayer says:

      Guido, what is it about your Modbot? Five of the last six posts “awaiting moderation”? Or am I on some blacklist?

      • 17
        Lord Bowden of Middlesex says:

        Anything with P_E_A in gets modded , same with Pr*ce and J*w ,P*ul, St*ins, H*rry , C*le and a few others .

        • 24
          Mike Gatting says:

          What the bloody hell is wrong with p_e_a_s?

          rather fond of ‘em, myself

        • 52
          Anonymous says:

          It’s ridiculous. Everyone knows Guido’s real name. Why does he act like it’s some deep dark secret. He’s a plank!

        • 81
          English Viking says:

          What about C00N?

          • a Hoon by any other name says:

            You mean Cuhne.

          • a Hoon by any other name says:

            You mean Cuhne?

          • war is not a good alternative says:

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          • Infuriated of West Mids says:

            You bell end.

          • Bell End says:

            fnar fnar

          • man with custard in one ear and jelly in the other says:

            Could you repeat that? I am a trifle deaf.

          • nell says:

            You must be labour.

            They just don’t seem to be able to put any coherent thought together anymore do they?!

            Here they were tonight opposing the NHS Reform Bill.

            So what were they proposing to put in its place? Errr Nothing!!!

            They hadn’t got a single idea how they might tackle the problem. They were just like kids throwing a pointless paddy opposing mum’s reasonable rules.

            Very labour. No rhyme no reason!!

          • MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

            TAT seek help you are fuckin sick !

          • TAT says:

            And You Frank are MAD and not Cod’s son

          • trip dickwell III says:

            Fair enough, twatter.

          • Anonymous says:

            What’s on your mind?

          • Eric the Ginger says:

            What about a Cuhne?

        • 157
          testing testing says:

          9345

      • 54
        Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

        You can’t use words like ‘blacklist’. You should ask “Guido am I on a list of non specific racial orientation”

      • 56
        Anonymous says:

        He’s a paranoid plank!

  10. 14
    Anonymous says:

    Guido, this is just stupid.

    You know the reasons for no box on Friday – Sunday, and for no submissions after a certain time of day.

    Huhne has his weaknesses, but none of them are as weak as this post.

    • 22
      Anonymous says:

      Just get rid of this loud mouth hypocrite

    • 36
      The Paragnostic says:

      Go on then, smartarse – please enlighten the rest of us as to the reasons for this c’unt getting paid a Ministerial salary for a 4 day week.

      I’m sure they are valid – why not explain?

      • 68
        Archer Karcher says:

        Doesn’t Clegg have an equally ‘gruelling’ twenty hour working week?

        • 72
          The Paragnostic says:

          Probably – but Huhne’s the idiot in question here, and I have yet to see any justification for his slacking.

          • Gay Slayer says:

            Oh yeah, from The Paraplegic retard who stays at home wanking and psoting all day.

          • The Paragnostic says:

            Some of us have jobs where you can work from home a lot of the time – it’s called programming :-)

          • AC1 says:

            Para,

            Have you annoyed the TwAT? If so, well done.

          • The Paragnostic says:

            Been annoying TaT for ages, AC1 – still, a bit of inter-celtic abuse is often fun…

      • 166
        Anonymous says:

        Because Fridays to weekends are days when they do their constituency work. Standard for all ministers. Guido will know this

        • 209
          The Paragnostic says:

          I would have thought that someone as self-important as Huhne would have a couple of relatives on the payroll to do the constituency stuff – surely there’s enough to sort out with energy policy without having a part-time minister…

  11. 16
    An oldie but a goodie says:

  12. 20
    Mark Oaten says:

    I’ve got something in my box.

  13. 21
    Mark Oaten says:

    Spank me

    • 38
      The Paragnostic says:

      I think you need Mr Schneider for that, and he’s bust writing his new can’t-sit-com.

  14. 25
    Tachybaptus says:

    The car in the picture, which is supposed to run on methane generated from human waste, doesn’t work properly and has to be started with petrol from a tank. See:
    http://www.geekwithlaptop.com/geneco-trials-poo-powered-car

    The car shown in the earlier post is a Tesla, which is electric, but its advanced lithium-ion batteries (same system as the ones in a laptop) are hugely expensive and gravely polluting, and, if you are counting carbon brownie points (about which I don’t give a fart, but IF you are), that and its high consumption of electricity from ordinary power stations make it far less ecologically sound than a small car with an ordinary petrol engine.

    ‘Green’ substitutes for ordinary things — electric and hybrid cars, low-energy lightbulbs, 6-litre lavatory cisterns that have to be flushed several times, etc., etc. — usually don’t work properly and, when all costs are taken into account, often result in a higher use of energy and greater pollution than the things they replace.

    We are being conned, here as elsewhere.

    • 40
      The Paragnostic says:

      The Tesla also does about 20 miles total between recharges if driven “enthusiastically”.

      It’s a load of Green cockwaffle.

    • 43

      I’ve just replaced a 50,000 hour green energy bulb. 1 year it lasted. If it was on 24 hours a day it should still have 6 years left.

      Replaced it with an old one I found.
      How luxurious to have that much light!

      I know its evil and in contravention of numerous EU directives and makes Greens cry, but its my bog and if I want a 100wt bulb I’ll have one.

      • 49
        The Paragnostic says:

        I’ve had decent life out of the expensive compact fluorescents, but I got some cheap ones a while back and they lasted an average of 1,000 hours or so.

        Got some nice LED arrays I made myself out of the LED torches from the pound shop, running off a 4.5 volt transformer, and they’ve lasted over a year so far with no problems – but there’s nothing cheap on the mass market yet.

        • 62
          AC1 says:

          LEDs are the proper future for lighting, not the mercury containing ones phillips bribed the EU to force on us.

          • Anonymous says:

            Managed to get hold of a job lot of 100w incandescents

            Bliss!!

          • Engineer says:

            Industrial grade ones are still available (I gather – don’t quote me on this) from motor factors and the like as spares for the lead-lamps used by mechanics and the like. Being a bit better-made than the old domestic ones, they should last well.

          • Mornington Crescent says:

            Not in my parents’ household, where they have a nice stash of 150W incandescents – 35 of the buggers at the last count.

            I saw an article in the Funny Old World section of the Eye a few weeks back, where someone is selling them as heat bulbs to get around EU diktats. Excellent stuff.

          • Anonymous says:

            Spot on, Engineer – they are indeed “rough use” industrials.

            Nabbed a box of the buggers – should keep me going for a few years

          • Postlethwaite says:

            Degradation of output is the problem with these ‘compact florescence.

            They start off ok at say 11 watts; after 6 months they are down to 8; 6 watts after a year and binned after 18 month. Of course that is cheaper than a long life tungsten bulb but worthless as a light source.

    • 46
      sockpuppet #4 says:

      The Tesla is a wierd one: I’m sure its just some sort of silly demonstrator /advert for the company. If it had been a 60mph ford fiesta it would have been zero news.

      What is gravely polluting about lithium batteries? Seriously. I wasnt aware of any particular problem, and even though NiMH does look more sensible in some ways. Li the element is hugely more abundant and at a guess not a problem.

      • 53
        • 65
          sockpuppet #4 says:

          you didn’t read that at all did you?

          It says lead bad, lithium good.

      • 59
        Tachybaptus says:

        Lithium batteries — it’s not the lithium per se, it’s the costly manufacturing of these complicated h-tech things. The lithium in them often gets recycled, in an odd and illegal way, by producers of methamphetamine. Which, I suppose, makes it quite ‘green’, but not in the way that the government intends.

        • 69
          The Paragnostic says:

          It’s cheaper and quicker to use sodium carbonate when cooking up crystal meth :-)

          • Accidental Rapist says:

            Fuck off paraplegic, you’re boring everyone

          • The Paragnostic says:

            Thankyou for an informative and erudite addition to the discussion, AR.

            Haven’t you got some milk and rusks to eat before bed?

          • Accidental Rapist says:

            Middle of the day where I am. Still, if I can’t sleep later I’ll re-read your posts.

      • 99
        Reality approaches says:

        #4

        Google Tesla; $540+ million dollar grant from US government for development, makes de Lorean look very cheap. Serious performance vehicle, just not for a decent distance.

        • 128
          sockpuppet #4 says:

          Right … so its the american government thats deciding to splurge money on trying to sell the idea to the american public.

          They’ve always had inventive ways of being keynsian.

          • jgm2 says:

            Like bankrolling Boeing and MacDonald Douglas by paying bazillions for their fighter aircraft (gotta be manufactured in the USA – critical defence know-how) so they can practically give away their passenger aircraft.

          • sockpuppet #4 says:

            Oh yes, its my firm belief that the real “Moon hoax” is that it was a marvellous piece of “commie” economics.

        • 231
          Archie says:

          Not a bad-looking car, but bloody expensive!

  15. 31
    Cicero says:

    Well, he has got several houses to run, that must take up a lot of time (when nicknamed ‘Nine Homes Huhne’, he objected that he only had seven).

    He probably also needs loads of time off to think up more anti-British insults (like saying we were all a load of whingers, then telling the Indy the British were too thick to appreciate the ‘obvious’ success of the euro).

    • 37

      Why did he support AV?

      Under FPTP he would have been leader of the Lemons, wouldn’t he?

      • 47
        Cicero says:

        Doesn’t his new girlfriend work for Electoral Reform Services? Weren’t they the ones who stood to make a lot of money out of printing the new AV ballot papers?
        I merely pose the question …

  16. 42
    You can't handle the truth says:

    Censorship on this blog is beyond a fucking joke.

    Your level of rare political insight has been reduced to ho*kers, dil*os and b*m.

    Rapidly going off this site. It isn’t doing what it says on the tin.

  17. 44
    The Paragnostic says:

    “UK ordered virginity tests on migrants”

    Shame it wasn’t sterilisation.

    • 85
      Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

      They’d be fucked in Essex

      • 202
        Roy "Chubby" Hattersley says:

        Q: Why do all Essex girls get prams when they’re 12?

        A: To teach them to walk on their back legs

  18. 51
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    Another jock prat’s classic

    • 77
      labourunionsbbc we are one says:

      Love it, play it every time, people I know when they say a stupid thing like that invariably crack a smile, they can’t help it. But the cowardly gordron is consumed with so much bile and hate that the only efect it has on him is to make him want to hit the next little woman he sees.

      • 101
        A classic says:

        I love the look on Harpic’s face when even she realises what Jonah has said.

  19. 55
    Concrete Pump says:

    Jeremy Clarkson would absolutely love to see photographs of him and Shere Khan together because he loves The Jungle Book

    • 70
      The Paragnostic says:

      Is he the King of the Swingers, then?

      • 129
        Accidental Rapist says:

        There’s a clever Taffy. At this rate you’ll doing basic maths soon

        • 154
          The Paragnostic says:

          Nah – did that when I was about 4. I’m not bad at sums – they even let me into Cambridge to do them…

  20. 58
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    I think the modbot has gone on a rampage.

  21. 73
    Gordon Brown says:

    I am a star in a reasonably priced Khan

  22. 78
    Antoinette Blair says:

    Let them eat cock.

  23. 79
    Down With Brown! says:

    Huhne is a lazy Hunt!

  24. 80
    labourunionsbbc we are one says:

    Just entered my name on a form (not Guido’s), it says: “Given names”.

    See, their not allowed to say Chris *tian name anymore.

    Where is this censorship going?

    • 104
      The Paragnostic says:

      It’s not censorship, just realism.

      When 1 in every 4 births in the UK is to subcontinentals, there are far fewer Christian names being used compared to 15 years ago.

      I’d put bromide in the gram flour.

  25. 82
    BillyBob... No NHS treatment for immigrants, reform reform!! says:

    Chop off ‘is knob, the knob !

  26. 90
    Concrete Pump says:

    Guido Fawkes is the coolest fucker in the world!

    • 120
      concrete sump says:

      Oh Christ, you’re back. If only to wish your hero to fuck you up the arse.

      Haven’t you got a Playstation to get back to?

      • 131
        Concrete Dump says:

        Oh no, not CP’s stalker. Haven’t you got a stash of child porn to get back to?

  27. 92
    Down With Brown! says:

    Twitter killed the Superinjunction:

    http://twitter.com/#!/InjunctionSuper

    • 152
      lord fuckaduck of fuddlesex says:

      Is £195 really the going rate to have a dildo rammed up your arse? I’d want the real thing at those fucking prices.

  28. 93
    Wasted Talent says:

    I was hoping that David Laws expense fiddles really were down to him not wanting it be known that he is a homosexual. Afterall he was a better tory minister than most tory ministers.

    Unfortunately it looks like he was on the expenses fiddle over the long term and sexuality does not really come into it.

    Bloody shame as I am sure he has a lot to offer his country but not now as an MP

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/mps-expenses/liberal-democrat-mps-expenses/8501064/David-Laws-facing-criticism-as-expenses-report-published.html

    • 107
      The Paragnostic says:

      Reading that, I’d suggest he’s toast.

      The change in his pattern of claims following the reduction of the receipt-free limit shows that he was creaming the system for whatever he could get – I’m afraid that makes duck houses and moat cleaning look positively noble.

      Still, a by-election in Yeovil should provide some fun…

      • 178
        Camoron and Clegg, ueber-troughers extraordinaire says:

        Fuck you, you grotty little taxpayers. We really hope David Laws can return to the Cabinet ASAP.

        The ghost of Mandeslcum lives on in the coalition.

        • 208
          Infuriated of West Mids says:

          Ha ha – you gone and did a funny by spelling Cameron “Camoron”. Ha ha ha.

          I don’t personally care what MPs cream off parliamentary expenses as long as they do a decent job. I know that I cream my petrol money for travelling to see clients in my private sector job as much as I possibly can, and I defy anyone to say they’d do differently. I hate the Lib Dems, but I’d still rather see Laws in the cabinet than H*hne.

          • The Paragnostic says:

            I used to claim exactly the correct mileage, but dr*ve carefully so I had a couple of hundred miles a month to spare for weekends.

            Fiddling? Possibly, but not on the scale that Laws is accused of – from the article it seems he claimed 900 quid for utilities, phone bills, cleaning, maintenance, insurance and ‘household items’ – the utilities bills came to a ton and a half, which mysteriously shrank to 37 quid when they tightened the expenses up.

            That’s just taking the piss – as much as I’d like to see those piss-taking abilities deployed in the national interest, the man’s a crook.

  29. 94
    geekparent says:

    Only seen a Tesla once. It was doing 50 mph behind a lorry in the slow lane of the M4

    • 103
      Engineer says:

      Was there a flying lead from the car to the generator in the lorry?

      • 111
        The Paragnostic says:

        The lorry was, in fact, the Tesla’s extended range battery pack.

        They only do about 20 miles flat out…

        • 122
          Engineer says:

          Quite.

          I don’t mind people building electric cars or developing advanced batteries – after all, if you don’t try things you don’t advance – but I do object to the the things being hyped as a direct replacement for IC-engined vehicles.

          It’s significant that nobody has yet come up with an electric white van, or an electric HGV. They both need range – go all day on a tankful – can’t even get close to that with batteries yet.

          • sockpuppet #4 says:

            interesting of course is that many people will be doing 10 or 20 miles per day commuting, and almost all of the time do little else.

            But then, you’d need an entirely different car for the other days.

        • 139
          Accidental Rapist says:

          Eh, you’re dead funny you. Do you sing too like most Welshes. Bet you sound like Charlotte Chruch giving birth – and look like her gash afterwards.

          • Welsh Windbags says:

            Isn’t the fattest teenager in Britain some Welsh bird?
            Paraletic has a cheek talking about deep fried mars bars and all that mythical shit when his own countrymen are the real fat fuckers. Smokescreen it’s what he does best.

          • The Paragnostic says:

            At least our women are fattened up on salt bacon and loads of butter, unlike the typical Jock slag who thinks Bucky and cheesy chips is the height of sophistication…

          • Roy "Chubby" Hattersley says:

            Jock like their birds well battered

    • 108
      Joss Taskin says:

      A tosser in a Tesla ??

  30. 95
    Down With Brown! says:

    The Bliar received £400,000 from a fund for disadvantaged children to set up an office in a five-star hotel.

    Read more: http://www.express.co.uk/posts/view/245508/Tony-Blair-used-children-s-cash-to-set-up-office-Tony-Blair-used-children-s-cash-to-set-up-office-#ixzz1LsdhiobB

  31. 97
    Dodgy coppers says:

    North Yorkshire’s chief c-untstable admits disreputable conduct by helping a relative in recruitment drive.

  32. 102
    Engineer says:

    I don’t fancy owning an electric car. I’m sure the extension lead would end up tangled in the traffic.

    • 114
      RED ED - SON OF BROWN says:

      That car is going too far, too fast.

    • 171
      I know why the Amish don't like wires says:

      You’re on to something there. If it’s anything like my laptop or digital camera or mobile phone or toaster or lawn strimmer, you’d plug your electric car into the mains in the evening and then, the next morning, you’d spend half and hour trying to untangle the unholy mess of cables.

    • 188
      jgm2 says:

      What we need are roads like Scalextric (sp?) tracks. A couple of connectors sticking out of the bottom of the car and, hey-presto you’re charging your battery as you’re driving.

      Bit of a problem for pedestrians mind you. It’d be like a fucking enormous bug-zapper. Old folk, kids, lollipop ladies being vaporized and spattered all over the Queen’s highway. BZZZZZ .

      • 190
        jgm2 says:

        Have you seen those chargers that recharge your ishit or whatever without needing to plug them in? Probably work by induction or somesuch. Maybe we could wire up the roads to charge your car by induction while you’re driving the fucking thing via buried cables or summat.

        • 216
          The Paragnostic says:

          That’s great so far as it goes, but whacking a large induction coil under a steel bodyshell might warm it up a little…

          We’ve got plenty of coal left – just license the SASOL coal to oil process and fuck the Greens.

      • 203
        AC1 says:

        Elect me, and I’ll replace London tube system with bumper cars.

    • 233
      Anonymostly Annoying says:

      The point is that most electric cars on the market only have a range of 100 miles and there are few charging points even in major cities …anywhere else forget it.

      In addition if it takes 7 hours to fully charge the battery after every journey it would make those queues at the pumps look rather good. Another thing occurs to me is if while your car is connected to a charging station(I suppose you will have to pay for charge up)what if someone disconnects your car and connects theirs and to make insult worse uses your connection lead thus getting a free recharge so when you return you have the double insult of your car battery being dead and also someone using the electricity you’ve paid for to charge theirs and drive off.It’s bad enough with petrol siphoning without adding electricity nabbing……

      Electric Cars ….if you’ll forgive the pun..are unlikely to go anywhere in the immediate future and it seems to me that it is a retrograde step rather like going back to the stage-coach after the train(er hang though a stage-coach would probably be quicker…so delete that)

  33. 106
    Gordon Brown says:

    100th!

  34. 112
    Blair makes Charles Manson look decent says:

    I wish I could say I wasn’t surprised given his track record, but this is truly revolting. The c unt has a personal wealth of about £70m and he still raids the coffers of a fund for children in poverty. The man has gone beyond sociopathy and reached a whole new level of evil. And yet even now, even now, there are Labour supporters who’ll say Labour is for ordinary people and blame Thatcher for bad weather. Unlike many here, I’m not a fan of Thatcher but I will say this. She didn’t take the country to war on a lie, she didn’t bully staff with violent outbursts, she didn’t bankrupt the country, and she didn’t line her pockets with money intended for the third world’s poor.

  35. 113
    C. u.n.Trimmingthem says:

    He fills up my box on Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays.

  36. 116
    Don't miss Dispatches on coalition's first year says:

    Dispatches at 8 on channel 4, “A Year Inside No10″, presented by Andrew Rawnsley.

  37. 123

    Ecclestone: Pay-per-view ‘would be suicidal’ for F1: F1 commercial rights-holder Bernie Ecclestone reveals just why he believes a New…

  38. 127
    Dispatches says:

    Entertaining Dispatches on Channel 4 right now with interviews with all the coalition players: Cameron, Clegg, Danny Alexander, Cable etc.

  39. 132
    Down With Brown! says:

    Only one policeman who saw Ian Tomlinson’s fatal push wrote it up in his log.

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-13334642

    • 136
      PC Plod says:

      Listen slags, we’ll kill as many of the public as we facking like. Now fack off.

      • 164
        Police Superintendent Piggy Pigshit says:

        I would like to clarify the point made earlier by PC Plod. We’ll harass and kill as many of the white, non-effnic public as we facking like. We realise the rest of you are merely glorious immigrunts enjoying your rich and diverse cultural identity which we in the Met celebrate and applaud. Carry on!

  40. 133
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    Vince Cable really does come over as a c u n t

  41. 134
    Accidental Rapist says:

    I think gay, slut, whore and Tory all get modded. And Donut.

  42. 137
    Paul Cole & Harry Staines, Gay Lovers says:

    Just seeing if this gets modded.

  43. 140
    Dispatches says:

    Oh dear. Aaron Porter on Dispatches. Fuck off.

  44. 141
    Concrete Pump says:

    I see Bin Ladens Superinjunction got overturned

  45. 150
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    Channel 4 is a hoot, the fucking scum in the north just don’t get it do they? WE HAVEN’T GOT ANY MORE MONEY TO GIVE YOU BENEFITS SO YOU CAN BUY YOUR DRUGS, FAGS AND BOOZE YOU PIG THICK C U N T Z

    • 161
      Thick Northern Parasite says:

      But the South is full of millionaires, like, who are ripe for picking like. Limitless free money for us up North; Labour just gived us all their money, like, by ‘eck. Eee by gum. Get out o’ road.

      Why has that money stopped, like? Vote Labour for more free money, eeh by gum mushy pe*as and pigs’ trotters like.

      • 191
        jgm2 says:

        Not forgetting of course that it’s all Thatcher’s fault that you have been unemployed for 30 years and your kids have no jobs. And neither do their kids.

        The obvious solution – leave the fucking place – being completely invisible to y’all.

    • 236
      Kev says:

      “Daisy cutter”. I paid 95 k in tax and NI last year. I live in Newcastle. Don’t tar all of us with same brush, in my travels have been to plenty of places south of Watford Gap with benefit munching parasites there. Our glorious capital for one, and of course, the lovely Essex ain’t full of pram pushing Chav slags is it?

      • 252
        I Remember You Hoo says:

        Our ‘glorious capital’ is not part of this country anymore.

        • 261
          Titford Hat says:

          I got on the tube a couple of years ago and I was the only white bloke in the (rather full) carriage.

  46. 155
    Mischcon De Reya says:

    What’s the difference between the coalition and a bondage prostitute?
    Nick Cleggs’ dick is being held tighter by Cameron; although Clegg is facing some pressures in the coalition too.

  47. 167
    Gordon says:

    Madness.

  48. 170
    Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    Can I have a super injunction put out on Brown? Because for 13 years he fucked me and 50 million other English people for 13 years and now he wants to sell his story.

    • 172
      The Whole Story says:

      My story by G Brown.

      “I sought to become a Scottish hero by fucking England. I fucked England good and proper but the bastard Scots subsequently voted S&P. Bastards.”

      The end.

      • 194
        nell says:

        He didn’t seek to become a scottish hero. He and the delusional labour party seriously believe he is one.

        militwit said yesterday that gordon was the only ‘bigbeast’ who could head up a campaign to stop scotland becoming independent!!

        Apparently if scotland becomes independent labour loses the majority of it’s uk votes. One paper, I think it was the mail this morning, says that if England and Wales held a General Election without scotland , labour wouldn’t have a chance of getting back into government.

        I can’t think of a better reason for scotland going independent. Hope it happens soon!!

        • 212
          Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

          Can it happen today?

        • 215
          Drop a Daisy cutter on the BBC says:

          Liebore have 41 jocks, take that off their 258 and they are miles behind the Tories on 307. If you don’t have the jocks at all then there are only something like 591 seats meaning you only need 296 for a majority, also Liebore may well lose another 20+ seats with the boundary changes.

          The Tories would walk any England/Wales only election.

  49. 186
    nell says:

    http://economictimes.indiatimes.com/news/news-by-industry/et-cetera/tony-blair-used-childrens-cash-to-set-up-office-report/articleshow/8204203.cms

    £400,000 international development funds (our money) set aside to benefit disabled children , was allocated to bliar by the last labour govt to fund his 5 star hotel stays in jerus alem.

    ‘nice men’ bliar and brown!!

    • 217
      The Paragnostic says:

      It was either Hilarious Benn or Wee Dougie Alexander (who has a sister in Scotland with form for accepting dodgy donations) in charge at the time – the article just says 2007 and Hilarious left the DfID at the end of June that year.

      Still – two scions of grand Liebour dynasties…

  50. 187
    Clap Clap Bravo says:

    LOL at the lulzy shit in this blog tonight.

    • 196
      nell says:

      What sort of lazy madeup labour word is lulzy?

      Is labour now so far up a creak without a paddle that it’s having to make up new nonsense words to cover up its complete lack of workable policies for running the country.?!

      • 201
        Jon Shuttleworth says:

        crEEk

      • 211
        Just Desserts says:

        1 year ago tomorrow Gordon Brown got kicked in the ballot box.
        5 days later he was prised from office.

        Hope you’ve got a ‘special’ commemorative post planned Mr F.

        • 224
          Small society in the Big House says:

          Prised from office, but still on full pay.
          But Dave won’t do fuck all about it, because he’ll be in the same boat shortly.
          British democracy. Don’t cha just love it?

  51. 192
    Anonymous says:

    “Saving energy means no work for Huhne on a Friday, Saturday or Sunday it seems…”

    Or, perhaps it means no departmental work for Huhne on a Friday, Saturday or Sunday. But carry on with ranting. Your grasp on logic is really keen. Ha ha ha

  52. 198
    Jon Shuttleworth says:

    Rally Against Debt HAHAHA

    Your mecca the city of London is based on the industry of debt. Without debt your precious banks and your financial system would not exist.

    What about all those traders you revere, buying and selling stuff they haven’t even got, on the never never. Naked short selling HAHAHA

    Total cretins.

    • 218
      The Paragnostic says:

      Most people realise that it’s all a money-go-round, if not a Ponzi scheme.

      Trouble is, there’s precious little else generating taxable income in the country. so any restrictions on the financial casinos are to be approached with caution while our public finances are comprehensively fucked after 13 years of overspend and shit regulation.

      And don’t get me started on fiat money and fractional reserve – they only exist because of a collective suspension of common sense…

      • 221
        AC1 says:

        FRB is fine.

        Basel 2 was a crock of shit though.

        • 226
          The Paragnostic says:

          FRB is fine – so long as the expected level of repayments is kept up, and reserves are not eaten into.

          Once people can’t repay the loans, then the asset values of the collateral come into play, and it’s that factor which was incorrectly accounted for in the CDO fiasco which led to the subsequent failure of the inter-bank lending mechanism and the inability of some risky lenders to hold sufficient reserves even under Basel 2.

          It’s still a big con trick, though – it only works as long as everyone believes in it.

    • 227
      Cynic says:

      The belief in money is the same thing. Money is just paper – or these days bytes. Money is debt – a promissory note.

      SO what though. The system works unless become a Zimbabwe or 1930s Germany and now we have a Conservative Government that’s unlikeness

  53. 199
    Anonymous says:

    Why are the limp dicks wasting their time pretending to have nothing to do with ConDem policies? Everyone knows Clegg is Cameron’s bitch. The Libs are cheap whores and should fuck off and join the tory party where they belong. They will never again be seen as anything other than the slags they are.

    • 235
      Fog says:

      Except Limpdems are left of Labour, and more loony than Labour, if thats possible.

  54. 205
    Cynic says:

    Why does Hune remind me of Noddy?

  55. 219
    Whizzer and Chips says:

    My grandad said he was never scared of the dark when he was young.

    He even had a couple of them for pets.

  56. 222
    Larry Sanders says:

    And in the news today, David Laws finally puts to bed the rumour that he was only claiming maximum expenses in order to protect his parents from having to see him live a life of poverty in the closet.
    Tune in tomorrow night when we’ll have Chris Huhne’s lesbian lover spilling the beans on who wears the strap on!
    No flipping!

  57. 229
    Good riddance says:

    This time last year was the beginning of the final full day of Jonah McDoom’s horrific premiership. In the early evening of the 11th, we heard the magical words: “Thank you… uh and goodbye”.

  58. 230
    The Paragnostic says:

    Tugendhat makes an ass of himself again – this time making a court order against 3 US companies.

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2011/may/09/us-billionaire-wikipedia-defamation

    Who does this puffed up bewigged buffoon think he is? He’s making a laughing stock of the law every time he opens his well-lubricated mouth, or so it seems.

    Maybe he should restrict himself to one bottle of Pomerol at lunchtime, and line his ample belly with steak pie before tying one on and making ludicrous judgements…

  59. 237
    jaqui smith says:

    How much would it cost to have my Huhne reduxed?

  60. 242
    Ed Miliband says:

    I wish I hadn’t been bottle-fed as a baby.

  61. 245
    Even Cable thinks that Huhne is a Huhne says:

    Vince Cable and Chris Huhne clash over carbon emissions
    http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/2011/may/09/vince-cable-chris-huhne-carbon-emissions

  62. 247
    Please Sir. says:

    What is a redux?

    • 251
      The dictionary says:

      An ux with socialist beliefs.

    • 256
      Osama Bacon Lardon in Brine says:

      It means a restoration, in this context it means to restore the Fuckwittery of Brown, Balls and retardED !

  63. 250
    Newsnight fight says:

    Apparently Newsnight last night had Tory Bear vs Polly Tuscany. Can someone please upload this?!

    • 255
      Osama Bacon Lardon in Brine says:

      Polly Twat said something about that more than 50% of the country were progressive so therefore more than 50% country are anti – conservative so we need a Liebour government ( to fuck the country up again)! TB struggled to get a word in!

      You couldn’t make it up how much free spouting air time the BBC give polly twaddle FFS!

  64. 254
    Twobadmice says:

    Have you seen Clarkson’s feet?
    Not nice.
    You would have thought they would have hardly been used.


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Commies Blame Capitalism For Terror Attack | The Commentator
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Osborne’s Complacency | FT
DWP’s Welfare Failings | Isabel Hardman
Get Used to Coalitions | David Aaronovitch
Woolwich a Showcase in the Banality of Evil | Fraser Nelson
The Enemy Within | Max Hastings
Muslim Led Military-Style Free School Needed | Toby Young


Zimbabwe-Election-125x125
Guido-hot-button (1)


Ed Balls stretches credulity by claiming he isn’t ambitious

“I would love to be part of Ed’s Labour government but what I do next for me is not an all-consuming passion. I’m more bothered, in a personal sense, about getting to grade 8 piano by the time I’m 50.”



Ned Flanders – Clegg
Lisa Simpson – Natalie Bennett
Milhouse – Hilary Benn
Martin Prince – Andy Burnham
Edna Krabappel – Luciana Berger
Crazy Cat Lady – Glenda jackson
Comic book guy – John Prescott
Carl – Chucka
Lenny – Philip Hammond
Willie – Eric joyce
Poochie – Gordon Brown
Reverend Lovejoy – Tony Blair


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