Sunak wasted no time at taking a jab at the turmoil in Number 10. Attacking Labour’s changes on employment law, Sunak took a swing at Sue Gray’s sacking:
“When did the Prime Minister first become a convert to fire and rehire?”
Cue much roaring of laughter and cheers from the Commons…
Rather too much cancer in PMQs today for your sketchwriter’s taste – but then, as with so many disagreeable things, there is a silver lining. Cancer allows Ed Davey’s new voice to be heard. This achieves a new level of eloquence in quiet, clerical sympathy for the afflicted. So powerful is the effect this tone creates, that it might be made available on the NHS as a cost-neutral, double-action, two-for-one laxative and emetic. The Lib-Dems first practical contribution to surviving the NHS.
But to more urgent matters.
At 17 minutes past the hour, Government backbenchers recovered their voice. The poor young chimps and chumps have taken a beating in the last 24 hours with the winter fuel debacle and they had become despondent, yes, even depressed. Their mental health has been affected (we need to consider that before making humour at their expense).
When Nigel Farage rose, they began stuttering with anticipation, “Sh-shu-shu” they went waiting for the moment they could shout “Shame!”
Farage, a little hoarse perhaps from getting a word in sideways on Donald Trump, took us through the recent scenes of celebration outside British jails where “serious career criminals were released to make way for rioters but also for people who had said unpleasant things on Facebook.”
The benches opposite him were stirring. Bench monkeys making that low-level hooting as they jiggled in their seats. “Does the Prime Minister understand there is a growing feeling of anger in this country of” (wait for it) “of two-tier policing” and the rest went unheard under a great, exultant chorus of the Labour leitmotif: “Shame! Shame! Shame!”
Guido readers may not be aware that the Left have defined “two-tier policing” (an observable reality by any objective measure) as a far-right myth or conspiracy theory.
Farage takes a close interest in modern politics so probably does know this and conducted that Red Wall orchestra like a maestro. Every constituency where Reform came second to Labour will now be memed night and day with their MP hooting, “Not only is my grasp of reality tenuous but I call out my constituents as bigots and racists who should be ashamed of their deplorability!”
Denouncing one’s voters in the cause of virtue is a recognised electoral device and has a powerful effect on voting intentions.
Is it possible Reform wins another 70 seats and becomes the third party next time round?
Rishi returned to the grande bouffe of the Winter Fuel debate. There are several courses yet to be enjoyed. Where was the impact assessment that was surely written before the measure was introduced?
The PM replied, “Black hole.” And, perhaps to distract attention from the fact that cancelling the payments is going to add £1.5 billion to the famous £22 billion, he told the ex-PM, “Apologise!”
Rishi went back with Labour’s earlier research that suggested nearly 4,000 pensioners would perish from the lack of the payment. Are the numbers higher or lower than that, he wanted to know?
What he really wanted to know was “Are you dim enough to nominate the number of dead pensioners you are expecting?”
No PM is that dim. And certainly not when Black Hole and Stabilise the Economy are to hand.
To be fair, Keir’s service-led mission to stabilise the economy has borne fruit. The economy stabilised almost as soon as he was elected, and the measures he is introducing – for renters, trade unions, first day workers – will certainly replace “14 years of Tory failure and Tory chaos that crashed the economy” with Keir’s own credits and achievements. It may be in a way that restores Truss rather than Trust, but time will tell.
If the worst comes to the worst, as we are an adaptable people, we will learn to love cold and hunger while the Grid collapses and supermarkets shut down. We needn’t actually starve – apart from those of us too proud to be eating illegal immigrants’ dogs.
PS: A thought for the leadership contest. With the Tories’ reputation being so ragged, it may be worth reconsidering the first 18 months of opposition. Perhaps it is not a time to be tearing into the Government with righteous anger. The priority for getting any hearing is, psychologists tell us, likeability. The electorate will not listen to a party they don’t first like. A line of argument that leads inexorably, some think, to James Cleverly. If not this time, then in 18 months.
Reform Leader Nigel Farage blasted the “extraordinary celebratory scenes” as serious criminals walked free to the sound of popping champagne and raucous cheers – all to make room for rioters and those who said “unpleasant things on Facebook.” Farage didn’t hold back, questioning whether Starmer was aware about the public’s growing “anger” over the blatant “two-tier policing and justice system” in this country. The real Leader of the Opposition…
A feistier PMQs today as MPs return from recess. Sunak has been forced out of hiding, clearly taking advice from his aides when told his last PMQs was a little too “I wish you well, Starmer”. He slammed Labour’s decision to scrap the winter fuel allowance, asking Starmer to “explain why he has taken money away from [low income pensioners] whilst given more money to highly paid train drivers?” To which Starmer reminded the House that the Tory leader “favourite” Kemi Badenoch backed his policy a few years ago. A slightly odd reversal where the Tories are now slamming means testing a benefits scheme…
