Cricket, Opera and Interrailing in Northern India: What Our Recently Unelected MPs Are Doing Now

With the dust settling on Labour’s election landslide, many former Tory MPs have been enjoying their first summer of freedom since their schooldays. Here are some of the more eye-catching examples…

  • Richard Graham, former MP for Gloucester, has been piling on the runs on the cricket pitch, with scores of 110 not out and 135 not out. He was soon sledged for “getting more runs than he did votes…”
  • Alex Chalk, former Lord Chancellor and Secretary of State for Justice, donned his vest and trainers for the Cheltenham half marathon, finishing in a respectable 1:47:40. A way to go to beat fastest-MP Mathew Paris’ blistering 1.17 effort in 1985…
  • Robert Buckland, another former Lord Chancellor and Secretary of State for Justice, has confessed he’s been having a ‘brat summer’ (brat meaning chaotic, braless and imperfect for the uneducated.) Not sure British pop-star Charli XCX had test match cricket, the opera, and exploring the Austrian Danube in mind when she coined the phrase…
  • Greg Hands, former MP for Chelsea and Fulham, has embarked on an impressive gap year travelling through the US, Mexico and Canada, not to mention interrailing around northern India. Finding yourself is more fun than finding a job…
  • Meanwhile David TC Davies, former Secretary of State for Wales, has taken a hefty pay cut to become a senior advisor to Laura Anne Jones, Member of the Senedd for South East Wales. The only thing worse than being opposition in Westminster is being opposition in Cardiff…

Post-Westminster life isn’t all rosy, though. One former Tory MP tells Guido “many of the traditionalists are ruing the fact their first summer off has coincided with the worst grouse and salmon season for decades.” Feather and fin proving as elusive as votes…

UPDATE: Matthew Offord gets in touch to showcase his sailing of a yacht from Guernsey to Greece over the summer:

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In Memoriam: The Twelve Cabinet Ministers Who Lost Their Seat

Spare a thought for the following 12 cabinet ministers, who lost their seats last night:

  1. Gillian Keegan – Education Secretary.
  2. Grant Shapps – Defence Secretary.
  3. Penny Mordaunt – Commons Leader.
  4. Alex Chalk – Justice Secretary.
  5. Lucy Frazer – Culture Secretary.
  6. David TC Davies – Welsh Secretary.
  7. Simon Hart – Chief Whip.
  8. Michelle Donelan – Innovation and Technology Secretary.
  9. Victoria Prentis – Attorney General.
  10. Johnny Mercer – Veterans Minister.
  11. Michael Tomlinson – Illegal Migration Minister.
  12. Mark Harper – Transport Secretary

A new record…

 

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Tory MP in Trans “Penis” Row Insists He’s Not a “C**t”

Busy weekend on Twitter for Tory backbencher David TC Davies, who became embroiled in a nasty spat with the LGBT community when he proffered his view that “somebody possessing a penis & pair of testicles is definitely not a woman”:

The tweet provoked a strong response from the official LGBT Tories account:

Causing Davies to lodge a complaint with new Tory chairman Brandon Lewis:

Have fun with that one, Brandon…

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Labour Considered Migrant Dental Checks Too, Stella

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After David Davies MP argued that we should be using dental checks to assess the age of supposed child migrants there was a predictable backlash fromt the usual suspects including posh tweeter and MP, Stella Creasy:

Liam Byrne last night confirmed to Guido that when he was Immigration Minister he had considered tooth checks in principle before deciding they were impractical. Checking the teeth of child immigrants is not a niche view – 16 European countries have used dental checks to help determine the ages of asylum seekers or refugees. Former Labour Home Secretary Jack Straw has just backed the plan:

“I would certainly not as Home Secretary have ruled that out … having tests, providing they are not too intrusive and invasive, is actually a sensible thing to do for everyone concerned. Most of them are economic migrants and you have to be pretty firm about this. Part of the problem with the issue of whether they are children is you have got to test their age because you will understandably always get quite a lot of people who, knowing that it’s easier to get in because they are younger, will pretend they are under 18 when they are not. Some of those who are at Calais are genuine refugees but an awful lot are economic migrants,”

Is Creasy ashamed to be in the same parliament as her own party?

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Labour Called For Migrant Dental Checks

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The last Labour government advocated the same migrant dental checks that have caused so much outrage among the Twitterati today. Back in 2007 the then immigration minister Liam Byrne said that dental checks had to be considered to prevent abuse of the system:

“If it is true that a dental x-ray is able to establish within a more precise range an individuals’ age than any other form of determination then I think we have really got to look very hard at that evidence. We cannot have adults in the children’s system. Adults in the children’s system, I believe, pose a serious threat to our obligation to protect children effectively.”

A great find by Miles Goslett. As you can see above, this was covered by the BBC at the time. The David Davies proposal that is causing so much outcry was originally proposed by Labour nine years ago…

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Guido’s Guide to Tory Davises/Davieses

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The geniuses at HuffPo are very angry with Brexit Secretary David Davis, accusing him of proposing dental age checks on refugees arriving in Britain and illustrating their story with a picture of him at the desptach box. Also boarding the outrage bus are the amateurs at the LibDem press office, though they are upset with Philip Davies over the dental checks idea. If these Remoaners had checked before rushing out their Brexiteer bashing stories and press releases, they’d have seen that it was actually proposed by backbencher David Davies. Guido has produced a handy graphic to help HuffPo and the LibDems:

davies

There’s also Mims Davies, though less likely that mistake will be made. These Tory MPs all sound the same…

Graphic credit: @mrharrycole
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