Cabinet Minister Admits Affair

HALFON

Tory deputy chairman and Cabinet minister Rob Halfon has admitted to having an affair as the blackmail plot engulfing the party deepens. Halfon says in a statement:

“What I did was wrong, and I feel ashamed. I am not proud of myself. The most important thing to me is to continue to repair my relationship with my partner.”

In unrelated news, Alexandra Paterson [pictured], the chairwoman of the party’s official youth wing, who Halfon backed for the position and who is a close friend of the now notorious Mark Clarke, today deleted her Facebook and Twitter accounts…




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Quote of the Day

Philip Hammond uses a trip to Berlin to mock the Foreign Secretary:

“A compromise is the art of dividing a cake in such a way that everyone believes he has the biggest piece. Wise words with some applicability to the Brexit negotiations although I try to discourage talk of “cake” amongst my colleagues.”

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