Daylight Rubbery! Condoms in Venezuela Cost $755

Retailers in Venezuela will soon be wrapping up their businesses as the price of condoms in the joyless socialist dystopia climax at $755 a pack. The population is split and the secret police have been unsheathed to restore order, accusing businesses of running Trojan hoarding operations. “The country is so messed up that now we have to wait in line even to have sex,” says a frustrated Jonatan “Johnny” Montilla, while Jhonatan “Johnny” Rodriguez complains that abortion is illegal: “without condoms we can’t do anything“. Just the tip of the unrest. Time to pull out?


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Quote of the Day

Lucy Allan explains her positive comments about the Brexit Party…

“If EU elections are held, Leave supporting voters will want to vote for Leave supporting candidates… Usual party loyalties will be eclipsed by the Leave v Remain divide. It’s good to see strong candidates in the Leave camp. However, I sincerely hope we leave the EU before these elections are held so that we can move on and not waste time and money on unnecessary EU elections.”

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