Balls Upsets the Townsfolk

It’s an increasingly tight race in Morley and Outwood and Ed Balls is getting desperate. Punters give the Tories a 47% chance of taking the seat. Last weekend the town turned out for its annual St George’s day celebration. Despite an unofficial ban on politicking, guess who put in an appearance, keen to get some local flavour onto his website…

First he muscled his way into a photo with the Mayoress of Morley, ignoring pleas to keep things non-political and exclaiming, “Do you know who I am? I’m the Secretary of State!” Then he further endeared himself to locals by crashing the reception in the town hall, where he was heard talking through the religious ceremony.

His electioneering was so brazen that independent council members organising the event decided to invite his opponent Antony Calvert to balance things out. To cap things off, as the townsfolk began to head to the parade ground, Balls decided he’d rather not make the short walk himself and barreled his way into the Leeds’ Mayoress’ car. Her elderly husband was forced to walk, but at least Balls got his photo op.




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Quote of the Day

According to the Mail, when Tory MP Marcus Fysh called Venezuela a ‘socialist experiment gone wrong’ at PMQs, Jeremy Corbyn mouthed:

“What a complete w*nker.”

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