Tory / Bercow Love In Continues

New Tory Party Deputy Chairman Rob Halfon has told The Sun he wants to change the Tory party logo from an tree to a ladder:

“We are the party of the ladder, it was Churchill who first said that. The ladder symbolises everything we’re about. If you’re in poverty we’ll get you into work, if you’re in work we’ll cut your taxes. If you want to own your home, we’ll help you do that too. It’s not just leaving people to climb up it themselves, we hold that ladder for them.”

Re-elected Speaker John Bercow will be pleased, he chose the symbol for his coat of arms:


Though crueller Tories at the time said it represented his social climbing…

Ivan Massow Launch Strikes Sour Note

Some might say mocking up a £100,000 note with your face on it isn’t the best way for a millionaire politician to show he is in touch with the concerns of everyday people. Yet that is what optimistic Tory London mayor hopeful Ivan Massow has done:

Alas, the high production values of his launch video could not entirely compensate for the subject:

Ivan the Terrible…

Ben Harris-Quinney OUT of Bow Group

Following a successful round of media interviews during the election campaign, Guido understands that Bow Group chairman Been Harris-Quinney has decided to step down to spend more time with his numerous other made up jobs. Every single patron of the group blasted BHQ for his Blue-kip endorsement plan so the writing was on the wall.

Whips Warn Newbie MPs To Avoid Guido

Newbie Tory MPs have been warned during an initiation briefing of the perils of Guido.

Tory whips told the fresh meat ‘to just be careful’ when Guido is around…

Meanwhile, you can get in touch to brief against your new colleagues and leak stuff by calling 0709 284 0531 or emailing here.

Discretion (and, more often than not, career advancement) guaranteed…

How Grant Shapps Could Be Back in Cabinet in Just 3 Easy Steps

So, you’ve been demoted from your Cabinet-attending role as Tory party chairman to a lowly junior ministerial role at DfiD. Do not fear! Here is your how-to guide to getting back round the Cabinet table in just three easy steps:

Step One

The government’s decision on airport expansion is a step closer post-election. The LibDems – most importantly Vince Cable – are out and Boris has been given a role where he would not have to resign if the Tory government backs Heathrow. A decision could be made in the next few months…

Step Two

One person who would surely have to honourably fall on her sword if the government chooses Heathrow is Justine Greening. As MP for Putney, opposing a third runway was her main local campaign for re-election. As she says on her website, “Justine has led our community’s campaign against extra aircraft noise from an expanded Heathrow… Justine will continue to stand up for the thousands of residents who are concerned about aircraft noise”. Could she realistically vote for a Heathrow third runway?

Step Three

Who is the junior minister at DfiD who could step up to fill the vacant Secretary of State position in an emergency? Ah yes, the minister of state, one Grant Shapps.

Barring any brewing personal scandal that might slight his good character, there is a route back to the Cabinet table…

Bingle Muses on Losing Friends and Alienating People

Legend in his own lunchtime Peter Bingle must be bitterly regretting sending this most unfortunate tweet – among many – on election day. Good luck to any client the flamboyant Tory PR man now registers he is lobbying the Government on behalf of, as this must count as the Gerald Ratner moment of the campaign. Not sure that many Tory MPs will will be keen to be seen with the lobbyist who tried so hard to trash their saviour!

The New Government in Full

Prime Minister, First Lord of the Treasury and Minister for the Civil Service
Rt Hon David Cameron MP

HM Treasury
First Secretary of State*, and Chancellor of Exchequer – Rt Hon George Osborne MP
Chief Secretary to the Treasury – Rt Hon Greg Hands MP**
Financial Secretary – David Gauke MP
Exchequer Secretary – Damian Hinds MP †
Economic Secretary – Harriett Baldwin MP†

Home Office
Secretary of State for the Home Department – Rt Hon Theresa May MP
Minister of State – Rt Hon Mike Penning MP (jointly with the Ministry of Justice)
Minister of State – Rt Hon John Hayes MP
Minister of State – James Brokenshire MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Karen Bradley MP

Foreign and Commonwealth Office
Secretary of State for Foreign & Commonwealth Affairs – Rt Hon Philip Hammond MP
Minister of State – Rt Hon David Lidington MP
Minister of State – Rt Hon Hugo Swire MP
Minister of State (Trade and Investment) – Rt Hon Francis Maude
Minister of State – Rt Hon Baroness Anelay of St Johns DBE**
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – James Duddridge MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Tobias Ellwood MP

Ministry of Justice
Lord Chancellor, and Secretary of State for Justice – Rt Hon Michael Gove MP
Minister of State – Rt Hon Mike Penning MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Shailesh Vara MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State* – Andrew Selous MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Dominic Raab MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Caroline Dinenage MP

Ministry of Defence
Secretary of State for Defence – Rt Hon Michael Fallon MP
Minister of State – Penny Mordaunt MP
Minister of State – Philip Dunne MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Julian Brazier MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Mark Lancaster MP

Department for Work and Pensions
Secretary of State for Work and Pensions – Rt Hon Iain Duncan Smith MP
Minister of State – Priti Patel MP**
Minister of State – Ros Altmann CBE
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Justin Tomlinson MP

Department of Health
Secretary of State for Health – Rt Hon Jeremy Hunt MP
Minister of State – Rt Hon Alistair Burt MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Jane Ellison MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – George Freeman MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Ben Gummer MP

Office of the Leader of the House of Commons
Leader of the House of Commons – Rt Hon Chris Grayling MP
Parliamentary Secretary (Deputy Leader) – Thérèse Coffey MP

Department for International Development
Secretary of State for International Development – Rt Hon Justine Greening MP
Minister of State – Rt Hon Grant Shapps MP
Minister of State – Rt Hon Desmond Swayne MP

Department for Education
SoS for Education, and Minister for Women and Equalities – Nicky Morgan
Minister of State – Nick Boles MP
Minister of State – Nick Gibb MP
Minister of State – Edward Timpson MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Sam Gyimah MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Caroline Dinenage MP

Office of the Leader of the House of Lords
Lord Privy Seal, and Leader of the House of Lords – Rt Hon Baroness Stowell

Department for Transport
Secretary of State for Transport – Rt Hon Patrick McLoughlin MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Robert Goodwill MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Claire Perry MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Andrew Jones MP

Department for Business, Innovation and Skills
Secretary of State for Business, Innovation and Skills – Rt Hon Sajid Javid MP
Minister of State (Trade and Investment) – Rt Hon Francis Maude
Minister of State – Anna Soubry MP**
Minister of State – Nick Boles MP (jointly with the Department for Education)
Minister of State – Ed Vaizey MP
Minister of State – Jo Johnson MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – George Freeman MP

Northern Ireland Office
Secretary of State for Northern Ireland – Rt Hon Theresa Villiers MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Ben Wallace MP

Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs
Secretary of State for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs – Elizabeth Truss MP
Minister of State – George Eustice MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Rory Stewart MP OBE

Department for Communities and Local Government
Secretary of State for Communities and Local Government – Rt Hon Greg Clark MP
Minister of State – Brandon Lewis MP
Minister of State – Mark Francois MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – James Wharton MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Marcus Jones MP

Wales Office
Secretary of State for Wales – Rt Hon Stephen Crabb MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Alun Cairns MP*

Cabinet Office
Chancellor of the Duchy of Lancaster – Rt Hon Oliver Letwin MP
Paymaster General, and Minister for the Cabinet Office – Rt Hon Matt Hancock MP**
Parliamentary Secretary – Rob Wilson MP
Parliamentary Secretary – John Penrose MP* (and Government Whip (paid))

Department for Culture, Media and Sport
Secretary of State for Culture, Media and Sport – John Whittingdale OBE MP
Minister of State – Ed Vaizey MP
Parliamentary Under Secretary of State – Tracey Crouch MP

Scotland Office
Secretary of State for Scotland – Rt Hon David Mundell MP

Department of Energy and Climate Change
Secretary of State for Energy and Climate Change – Amber Rudd MP
Minister of State – Andrea Leadsom MP

Minister without Portfolio (Minister of State)
Robert Halfon MP* and **

Law Officers
Attorney General – Jeremy Wright MP**
Solicitor General – Robert Buckland MP

Whips – House of Commons
Parliamentary Secretary to the Treasury (Chief Whip) – Mark Harper MP**
Treasurer of HM Household (Deputy Chief Whip) – Anne Milton MP
Government Whip – Gavin Barwell MP
Government Whip – Kris Hopkins MP
Government Whip – David Evennett MP
Government Whip – John Penrose MP
Government Whip – Alun Cairns MP
Government Whip – Mel Stride MP
Government Whip – Charlie Elphicke MP
Government Whip – George Hollingbery MP*
Assistant Government Whip – Margot James MP*
Assistant Government Whip – Julian Smith MP
Assistant Government Whip – Guy Opperman MP
Assistant Government Whip – Sarah Newton MP
Assistant Government Whip – Stephen Barclay MP
Assistant Government Whip – Simon Kirby MP
Assistant Government Whip – Jackie Doyle-Price MP
Assistant Government Whip – Andrew Selous MP

Maggie Back in Business

“Sajid, you will protect our great island. You will protect our great island!”

Yes. I will.”

Junior Reshuffle as it Happens

Eric Pickles out of the Cabinet, becomes anti-corruption tsar.

Ros Altmann will become Pensions Minister at DWP.

Mark Francois will become Minister of State at DCLG.

Penny Mordaunt will become Armed Forces Minister at MoD.

John Hayes is the new […]

+ READ MORE +

Cabinet Filmed For the First Time

Unprecedented footage as Dave lets the cameras into Number 10 to film Cabinet for the first time…

And […]

+ READ MORE +

New Science Minister’s Dad: ‘He Doesn’t Know Anything About Science’

Iain Dale broke the news to Stanley Johnson that his son Jo had been made Minister for Science on LBC last night:

“Good heavens, I don’t think he knows anything about science! … He certainly knows the Latin for a

[…]

+ READ MORE +

Cabinet Reshuffle As It Happens

George Osborne reappointed as Chancellor and will also be First Secretary of State.

Theresa May stays as Home Secretary.

Philip Hammond remains as Foreign Secretary.

Michael Fallon stays as Defence Secretary.

Michael Gove to become Justice Secretary.

Chris Grayling is […]

+ READ MORE +



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team@Order-order.com

Quote of the Day

Rod Liddle:

“Family of 12 from Luton – including a baby and two grandparents who are suffering from diabetes and cancer – feared to have joined ISIS… yay – result! That’s saved us all quite a few bob, no? Carry on like this and we might clear the national debt.”

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