Wednesday, October 6, 2010

We Khan’t Go On Like This

Once could be seen as a mistake, twice a habit, but three times? Miliband campaign manager and expenses cheat Sadiq Khan is in yet more hot water. Once again he has been caught breaking expenses rules. First there was “the rose” incident, then the pending police investigation for fraud and now he faces the humiliation of John Lyon finding him guilty of sending out a political mail shot on his taxpayer funded communications allowance during his tight re-election campaign. Shadow Cabinet contenders should keep a close eye on their rival, it seems cheats do prosper.

With the rise of Red Ed, his most loyal follower looks set to be rewarded. His extremist views rule him out of the FCO, and quite extraordinarily, Labour are talking about putting another expenses cheat in the Home Office briefPerhaps Jacqui could come back as a Special Adviser…

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Lunch at Red Ed’s Diner

Friday, October 1, 2010

Red Ed Cracks the Whip

Prior to Saturday most of the Parliamentary Labour party were formulating Shadow Cabinet predictions around a David win.  Hitherto confident David supporters are now frantic about their futures. At this point zealous Labour spinners and Red Ed defenders will be itching to point out that the Shadow Cabinet is elected independently of the leadership however it seems that is not strictly true. One veteran Labour MP recently describe the process to Guido:

“Anyone who’s remotely ambitious and fancies themselves either a decent shadow cabinet portfolio or junior shadow ministerial role is paid a visit by one of the whips – whereby they hand over their ballot and the whip fills it out for them.”

No wonder ruthless Red Ed was so keen to get his Chief Whip in place immediately.

Friday Caption Contest (Poisoned Chalice Edition)

Ed Tries to Lose the Red, Again

Red Ed has called up the BBC strikers and asked them not to black out coverage of the Conservative Party conference next week. Before you start thinking this socialist isn’t so evil he ha intervened not because of any objection the strike action but in the ‘interests of impartiality’.

He’s going to need a better spinner than that.

UPDATE: Punters are giving the strike an 80% chance of going ahead.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

The New Generation

Red Ed has just finished his speech, it was a pep-talk for a “new generation”.

To Guido it still sounded like left-lurching, deficit raising, money wasting, demotivating, buzz wording, fool talking, high taxing, fast spending, ever wasting, vote losing, Labour.

UPDATE : It was apparently 8,000 words long, took over an hour and the weird staring into the distance blank pause at the beginning was Ed waiting for the autocue to start.

Red Ed The Taste of a New Generation

Red Ed’s speech is going to be, in the words of one who had seen a draft of it yesterday, “vacuous” and full of talk of a “new generation”. It will be a saccharine speech sharing not just a slogan with Pepsi, its content will also be sugary and vague, without New Labour’s ideologically bitter edge. Red Ed is the synthetic taste of New New Labour…

Monday, September 27, 2010

Red Ed V the IMF

On only his second day as leader Ed Miliband has come up a pretty big obstacle to his message on the economy – the IMF. Red Ed’s job has been made a lot harder by the IMF’s analysis that “the government’s strong and credible multi-year fiscal deficit reduction plan is essential to ensure debt sustainability.” Red Ed believes the Coalition’s plan is ‘economically dangerous’ whereas the IMF says it is ‘essential’.

In his keynote speech to conference tomorrow, the first time most of the voters will really see him, the broadsheet commentariat will be watching to see if he will call for a slower rate of deficit cutting than even Darling wanted before the election. He campaigned, like his rival Ed Balls, as a deficit denier so it remains to be seen if winning the leadership will see him dump his left-wing “Red Ed” campaign rhetoric. The IMF says the government’s plans are ‘appropriately ambitious” and will lead not to a double-dip recession but ‘sustainable recovery’. If this doesn’t trigger a rewrite of his campaign script then Red Ed is even more of a loser than his Blairite critics suggest…

How the Unions Won it for Red Ed

This morning’s papers could not have been comfortable reading for the majority of the Labour Party who did not vote for Ed Miliband. Despite attempts to say “so what” to the fact that Unite and the other unions have the leader of their party by the balls, Red Ed is being defined by his opponents (and supporters) before the voting public have any idea who he really is. Not without good reason, imagine the outcry from Labour if the Tories biggest donor had been given the deciding say in who the party leader is, against the wishes of the membership and MPs. Try as Ed may to claim he is his own man, the results speak for themselves and how they were achieved is very telling.

Not only was there the £135,000 given to Ed’s campaign directly, but money was spent elsewhere pushing his face and name. Take this ballot paper envelope from the GMB for example:

Unite the Union broke not only the spirit but the letter of the leadership election laws by sending a mailshot endorsing Ed when they sent the ballot papers to their 950,000 members.  Unite even set up a website backing Red Ed which linked to the Electoral Reform Society’s online voting page. If David Miliband had a little less dignity he would have pretty solid grounds for an investigation.

The unions gave help-in-kind worth millions. There is no way the unions will not want a return for their investment and in the campaign Ed promised to support strikes and even show his face at the TUC’s coordinated action day. Guido is fairly confident this won’t happen and Ed will have to attempt to distance himself from his puppet-masters. Expect tame words calling for political solutions and the like…

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Charlie Whelan Wins by a Whisker

Unite’s massive effort to persuade disinterested union members to vote for Ed Miliband paid off. Ed won 50.65% of the vote. He lost in the MP and membership sections of the electoral college but took so much of the union vote it didn’t matter. The unions bought the election, endorsements and incredibly heavy promotion of their chose candidate paid off. Charlie Whelan and Derek Simpson can justifiably claim it is their victory, they got Red Ed the job…


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