Eric Joyce Appeal For Witnesses

Nearly two weeks on from Eric Joyce’s latest brush with the law, this is still up on the door of parliament’s Sports and Social bar. Researchers hawking videos of the commotion around the papers should get in touch…

Clegg Says Scrap MPs’ Booze Subsidy

Clegg initially tried to deny the existence of the Commons booze subsidy on LBC this morning, but when presented with the facts by Nick Ferrari the Deputy PM gave in: “I haven’t seen the prices, but my knee jerk reaction is why should MPs be subsidised for drinking in the House of Commons?”

The £5.8 million subsidy would be a good place to begin, but it is also worth pointing out that since parliament’s watering holes are inside a Royal Palace, many of the bars pay no rent or business rates whatsoever. Research by the ASI calculates that they are saving £1.4 million-a-year as a result. All at the taxpayer’s expense…

Here are some of the other posts on the issue Guido has put out over the years:

Eric Joyce Staffer Martin Brown Knocked Woman to Ground
MP Reacted Angrily When Told His Friend Arrested

ERIC-JOYCE-MARTIN-BROWN

Guido has spoken to witnesses about last night’s fracas, this is what he has pieced together from various accounts.

At about 10.15 pm last night Eric Joyce’s researcher Martin Brown (pictured on the right above) exchanged words with Louise (an MP’s researcher, whose surname is known to Guido) outside the Sports and Social in the area where people smoke in the Commons Inner Court. In the ensuing altercation Louise was knocked to the ground.

alex-cruz-vidal

Alex Cruz Vidal (pictured, right), a researcher for deputy speaker Nigel Evans, intervened to protect Louise and restrain Martin Brown by wrestling him to the ground and sitting on him. The administrator of the Sports & Social came out and with Alex’s help manhandled a shocked Martin Brown into the bar’s little cupboard sized office and locked him inside until the police arrived. Police came to arrest Brown and Eric Joyce showed up shouting at the cops.

Joyce – who had already been involved in some argie-bargie in the Sports and Social earlier that night – is said to have arrived at the scene and reacted angrily to being told by a copper about the incident – he pushed the copper, who came back to restrain him, whereupon Joycey threw a punch at the copper. At this point another copper joined in to restrain him, resulting in the Honourable Member for Falkirk ending up on the floor being handcuffed before being taken away into the back of a police van.

By this time there was a large crowd and around a dozen policemen outside the Sports & Social – including PoliticsHome’s Tony Grew – who only saw the second altercation involving Joyce not the original altercation involving Martin Brown that kicked the whole thing off. Police closed the Sports & Social and the Strangers Bar early…

Police have this morning contacted those witnesses who had their names taken last night, to tell them they will be required to give full statements in due course. Charges will almost certainly follow…

Coincidentally Joyce’s 12-month community order for his last brawl expired six days ago. Two things that are clearly reinforced by this brawl; we need to end the obscene taxpayer subsidy that means the Commons bars are the cheapest pubs in Central London, secondly we need a real power of MPs’ recall. As we were promised by the coalition parties after the expenses scandal…

Join Guido at the YBF Rally, Then Fatboy Slim

Guido is off to parliament to speak at the ultrasound Young Britons’ Foundation rally this evening. Afterwards he is hoping to gatecrash Fatboy Slim’s charity DJ set at the Terrace bar.

Right here, right now – could hardly be more appropriate for YBF…

Lonely Tories Don’t Need Dates for Tomorrow Night

This invitation was sent last night from the Whips office to all Tory staffers:

You are cordially invited to attend the
Conservative Parliamentary Staff New Year Party
Thursday 14th February 2013
6pm – midnight

It seems they don’t have much faith in young Tories having dates tomorrow night then.

Right Here, Right Now, In Parliament
Fat Boy Slim to DJ Westminster

Guido is preparing to relive his more youthful days as Fat Boy Slim is playing in Parliament on 6 March, thanks to the Last Night A DJ Saved My Life Foundation. Norman Cook is excited too: “I’ve played some exciting and unique places around the world from Bondi Beach to The Great Wall of China to an Igloo but playing in the House of Commons might be the most unique to date.” See you at the “House The House” event. Sorted.

Sally’s Boozy Night With Tory Boys

Slumped in an alleyway outside a bar: this was Sally Bercow in the early hours of Friday morning. The Speaker’s wife had spent a boozy evening with young male Tory researchers, kicking off at the Sports and Social in Parliament before heading to Players’, a regular piano dive for twenty-something staffers. Alastair Whitby, who works for a Conservative MP, tweeted: “Pleased to see @SallyBercow was out and on form last night at Players Bar”, while another Tory researcher told how he was “Yoloing [You only live once] on the dancefloor with Sally Bercow”. No doubt it went down well with John…

Knife Out for Chuka

Guido was sad to miss two-faced Chuka Umunna dining in a pub popular with the Guy Newsroom team last night. Judging by his choice of meal, the Shadow Business Secretary was putting on his man of the people act, though a co-conspiratorial vintner whispers that the mask slipped and Chuka awkwardly came a cropper with his cutlery:

“He had a burger and a pint of s**t lager. Dropped his knife and waited for someone to pick it up for him. Nobody did of course.”

He does think he’s a cut above the rest, after all…

Guido’s Christmas Drinks

xmas

Guido is off to the Westminster Arms for our Christmas drinks. Join fellow readers, co-conspirators, Westminster wonks, movers and shakers, and seasoned drunks as we toast the end of another year of plots, rumours and conspiracy. Come down…
[…]

+ READ MORE +

Vinter William’s Fine Wines

hagye2

Say what you like about William Hague, the man certainly knows how to play host. Guido has got hold of the list of wines he has served to visiting kings, queens, presidents and prime ministers over the last year. No […]

+ READ MORE +

Guido’s Christmas Drinks

santaGuido’s Christmas drinks this year will be on Wednesday 19th December at 5pm, bringing together readers, co-conspirators, Westminster wonks, weirdos,  movers and shakers, and seasoned drunks.

If you fancy coming along then make sure you’ve subscribed to the Guidogram for […]

+ READ MORE +

The Sacked Soiree

After the September reshuffle sacked former ministers got together to form a drinking/dining club, loosely named the Geronimo Club due to the fact they shared the date of their demise with the old chieftain. Guido hears that the name has […]

+ READ MORE +



Tip offs: 0709 284 0531
team@Order-order.com

Quote of the Day

William Hague on Tony Blair…

“To the political law that you can’t fool all of the people all of the time he added Blair’s law – that you can make a very serious attempt at it.”

Top Posts This Week

Guidogram: Sign up

Subscribe to the most succinct 7 days a week daily email read by thousands of Westminster insiders.

Facebook

No, Britain Has Not Accepted Just 216 Syrian Refugees No, Britain Has Not Accepted Just 216 Syrian Refugees
POLL SUGGESTS REFERENDUM RE-WORDING HELPS EU-LEAVERS POLL SUGGESTS REFERENDUM RE-WORDING HELPS EU-LEAVERS
BURNHAM WEAPONISES REFUGEE CRISIS BURNHAM WEAPONISES REFUGEE CRISIS
TAIWANESE VIEW ON LABOUR LEADERSHIP TAIWANESE VIEW ON LABOUR LEADERSHIP
GOOGLE’S FUN FACTS: ARE YOU FEELING CURIOUS? GOOGLE’S FUN FACTS: ARE YOU FEELING CURIOUS?
PRO-EU LOBBYIST IN HEART OF WHITEHALL PRO-EU LOBBYIST IN HEART OF WHITEHALL

NONSENSE AND INSENSIBILITY: EMMA THOMPSON’S POETRY PROTEST NONSENSE AND INSENSIBILITY: EMMA THOMPSON’S POETRY PROTEST
ANTI-UKIP BURNHAM V PATRIOTIC ‘PURPLE’ ANDY ANTI-UKIP BURNHAM V PATRIOTIC ‘PURPLE’ ANDY
CORBYN: QUOTING THINGS I HAVE SAID IS “CYNICAL” JOURNALISM CORBYN: QUOTING THINGS I HAVE SAID IS “CYNICAL” JOURNALISM
All Change at News UK All Change at News UK
GDS IMPLOSION CONTINUES GDS IMPLOSION CONTINUES
Virgin Blackmailing Broadband Customers Virgin Blackmailing Broadband Customers
Google Logo Evolution Google Logo Evolution
Corbyn Supporters to ‘Drink Blood of Thatcher’ Corbyn Supporters to ‘Drink Blood of Thatcher’
Government Pleads Guilty to Climate Crimes Government Pleads Guilty to Climate Crimes
New REFERENDUM QUESTION New REFERENDUM QUESTION
“SECURITY” NO. 10’S CORBYN ATTACK LINE OF CHOICE “SECURITY” NO. 10’S CORBYN ATTACK LINE OF CHOICE
Guardian Looking For New Pol Ed Guardian Looking For New Pol Ed
NATIONAL CRIME AGENCY HACKED NATIONAL CRIME AGENCY HACKED
NO CAMPAIGN MAKING FRIENDS: “I HOPE YOU DIE IN A FREAK YACHTING ACCIDENT” NO CAMPAIGN MAKING FRIENDS: “I HOPE YOU DIE IN A FREAK YACHTING ACCIDENT”
CORBYN EQUATES BIN LADEN DEATH “TRAGEDY” WITH 9/11 CORBYN EQUATES BIN LADEN DEATH “TRAGEDY” WITH 9/11
RICH’S MONDAY MORNING VIEW RICH’S MONDAY MORNING VIEW
ENVIRONMENT MAYOR TOTTY WATCH: BRAZIL EDITION ENVIRONMENT MAYOR TOTTY WATCH: BRAZIL EDITION
HAIN GRAVY TRAIN HYPOCRISY HAIN GRAVY TRAIN HYPOCRISY
MONBIOT SKINS & COOKS SQUIRREL ON NEWSNIGHT MONBIOT SKINS & COOKS SQUIRREL ON NEWSNIGHT
DAVE’S CARBON BAGGAGE DAVE’S CARBON BAGGAGE
Daylight Robbery: Met Chain Themselves to £216 Billion 10 Year IT Contract Daylight Robbery: Met Chain Themselves to £216 Billion 10 Year IT Contract
Trumps Hair: Toupee or Not Toupee? Trumps Hair: Toupee or Not Toupee?
BURNHAM BLOWS DOG WHISTLE LINE BURNHAM BLOWS DOG WHISTLE LINE
DCMS FUN POLICE CALLED OFF THE CASE DCMS FUN POLICE CALLED OFF THE CASE