Thursday, March 7, 2013

Gordon Slapped Down, Again

How refreshingly honest of the Prime Mentalist to admit that his abandoned constituents are “hard-pressed and increasingly angry”. Gordon’s last question about Dalgety Bay left him with egg on his face, and yesterday he was embarrassed again by Defence minister Andrew Robathan:

“I will explain why we dispute much of what the right hon. Gentleman has said in a moment, but there is one thing that I particularly dispute. I know that when he was Prime Minister, and indeed when he was Chancellor of the Exchequer, he was very profligate with public money.

He was very willing to spend it, and then to leave us in the appalling financial condition in which we now find ourselves. I must tell the right hon. Gentleman that we take a rather more parsimonious and sensible view than I think he did when it comes to the spending of our constituents’ money… In closing, may I say how pleased I am to see the right hon. Gentleman in the House?”

Makes you wonder why he bothers…

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Life’s a Beach For Gordon

The Prime Mentalist is gracing us with his presence in the House tomorrow, having secured a debate about cleaning up radiation on a beach in his constituency. Let’s hope he puts in a little more preparation for his speech than he did for the written parliamentary questions he has been asking the Ministry of Defence recently. The replying Ministers politely pointed out that the MoD no longer owns the beach site in question and environmental issues are devolved to the Scottish government and are no longer Westminster’s concern. If he turned up a bit more, he might know these things…

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Cardinal O’Brien’s Career Was Doomed

The second most controversial picture of the Cardinal today.

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Happy Birthday Gordon

Best wishes to the Prime Mentalist as he turns 62 today. Twelve months without speaking in Parliament, £6,000 and more on air fares at our expense, £300,000-a-month in cash that is definitely not paid to him, an attendance record to be ashamed of, landing his successor in it, not to mention the worst of omens for His Holiness.

And that’s forgetting Gordon’s Olympic nightmare and his – shall we say – awkwardness at the Leveson Inquiry. To celebrate, why not enjoy his greatest hits one more time…

Monday, February 11, 2013

FLASHBACK: When Gordon Met the Pope

The Pope is resigning, the first to do so since Gregory XII in 1415.

It was all so predictable…

Thursday, January 24, 2013

The Eternal Shame of Gordon Brown

Like Guido, the loveable Icelandic President Ólafur Ragnar Grímsson holds a grudge with our former Prime Mentalist. Speaking to Sky last night he went on the attack:

“The Gordon Brown government decided, to its eternal shame, to put the Icelandic government on a list of terrorist states and terrorist phenomena. We were there together with al Qaeda and the Taliban on that list. We have not forgotten that in Iceland. Gordon Brown will be long remembered in my country for centuries to come, long after he has been completely forgotten in Britain.”

Not sure Gordon will ever be “completely forgotten”…

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

MPs to Debate “Great Gordon Brown Repeal Bill”

How good it was of the Prime Mentalist to turn up yesterday. Here is one he will no doubt want to skip however: the Great Gordon Brown Repeal bill is to be debated in Parliament next week. The proposal to reverse Labour’s scrapping of the 10p tax rate will be discussed by MPs at 2:30pm next Tuesday. Guido hears Gordon will be receiving a formal invitation…

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Gordon’s Alive: Prime Mentalist Finally Turns Up

See you at Christmas…

UPDATE:

Double Whammy

Gordon is in town as is big oil’s Al Gore, who was sighted on Air Street earlier. Which reminded Guido of one his favourite videos…

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Gordon’s Alive: Worth Every Penny

It’s well over a year now since Gordon Brown has spoken in Parliament but he has manged to put in two written questions on behalf of his constituents. The enquiries to the MOD are on the identical topic to his last batch of questions – ten months ago.

Written Answers – Defence: Dalgety Bay (17 Dec 2012)
Gordon Brown: To ask the Secretary of State for Defence what recent
assessment he has made of reports on the incidence of cancer in the
Dalgety Bay area.

So Brown’s total of contribution this year has extended to nine written questions, which on his MPs salary puts that at about £7,300 a pop. And that’s before you factor in the expenses he still has the cheek to claim…


Seen Elsewhere

Labour Was Too Slow for the Squeezed Middle | FT
Papers Pan Cam’s Immigration Pledge | ConHome
Deane of St Edmundsbury? | Times
Pay Volunteers and They Become Cheap Labour | Jill Kirby
UKIP Fundraiser Was Jailed for Running Brothels | Times
Bercow Faces Probe Over Pass Mystery | Mirror
Harman Breaks Rules on Paying Staff | Express
Labour Whinge About Sandi Toksvig Joke | Mail
BBC Boss Search in Disarray | Times
Tory Membership Set to Outstrip Labour | Staggers
Three Cheers for the David Brents | Ed Conway


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John McTernan told Channel 4 News

“You can’t make an omelette without breaking a few eggs, you don’t win in politics without breaking legs.”



Rob Wilson says:

Without Predujice

Darling

What time will dinner be ready this evening?

Yours

Rob Wilson MP

In the interests of me I am placing a copy of this email in the public domain.


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