April 24th, 2014

Literally No One Watching London Live

Dire figures for London Live being reported by Forbes today:

  • London Live’s Breakfast Show, Wake Up London, broadcasts for three hours each morning. It has scored an average of 2,400 viewers.
  • Wake Up London’s highest rating for a full hour was from 8am until 9am on April 2, when it had 15,100 viewers.
  • On eight occasions, Wake Up London has broadcast for a full hour to no measurable audience – a Barb score of zero viewers.
  • At 6.30pm, London Live broadcasts a 30-minute live show about going out in the capital, called London Go. It has averaged 5,600 viewers.
  • London Go’s highest rating was 38,000 viewers, on launch night; its lowest, on three occasions, 300 viewers.
  • At 7.00pm comes a one-hour topical discussion program called Not The One Show. It has averaged 4,000 viewers.
  • Not The One Show also scored its highest rating on launch night, with 20,900 viewers. Its lowest figure (on Easter Monday) was 200 viewers.

It’s coming up to a month since the launch. How much longer can it survive?


  1. 1
    Corby says:

    First I have heard of it at all.

    Sounds as if London live is dead.

  2. 2
    Anonymous says:

    And today’s special guest is Marie Celeste

    Marie, I hear you’re a big fan of Nick Clegg

  3. 3
    Ohthisbloodypc says:

    Apparently, Ed Miliband is anxious to appear, but they turned him down

  4. 4
    Dynamic Milliband says:

    I shall be making my policy announcements on London Live, Mr Axelrod says it would be perfect vehicle for me.

  5. 5
    Whippersnapper2 says:

    No idea, never heard of it. But the thought is to put the whole prog. in Urdu.
    Well, London is like that – so they tell me…..from far away – TG.

  6. 6
    Londoner says:

    Not interested.

  7. 7
    Shooty* says:

    Still more popular than the Guardian cafe.

    Tips: Broadcast the call to prayer. Take a leaf out of the BBC book and make is massively pro-“peaceful” religion.

  8. 8
    Binkers o Bum says:

    I watched the evening show, was actually OK, but not in HD so all looked a bit cheap and fuzzy.

  9. 9
    Lydia Dustbin says:

    Tried to find it on digital, but no luck. No wonder no-one is watching

  10. 10
    Anonymous says:

    Isn’t this what Lenny Henry seeks?
    Their website has lots of black people, not many asians, no chinese.

  11. 11
    Chris Patten says:

    We at the BBC have much to learn it seems – sounds the way to reach ultimate minority group.

  12. 12
    Anonymous says:

    no Farage smear?

  13. 13
    Mohammed F says:

    and no white people – rather like uk schools

  14. 14
    Munchtrousers Syndrome by Proxy says:

    The Wikipedia entry for LL has a staff list that reveals how hideously white it all is. I suppose your akshull black people didn’t have the backing or the gumption to do it themselves, so it’s very kind and generous of whitey to step in.

  15. 15
    The Growler says:

    Beats me why anyone at that time, if they are going to work has time to gawp at any TV, what with getting up washing/showering, getting the kids up, getting breakfast ready, make sure the kids are washed and dressed, eating breakfast, getting the kids off to school. On the other hand if one has the home help to do all that for you you have all the time to watch the box.

  16. 16
    Cardinal Biggles says:

    S4C can only dream of such viewing figures!

  17. 17
    A London Chav says:

    Fack orf you cahhnt, the facking kids can get themselves to school – I did too much low grade gak last night and need a lie in.

    Like I care if the little fackers go anyway.

  18. 18
    Ancient seafarer says:

    He is the flying Dutchmen reincarnated. Empty from top to bottom…

  19. 19
    MB. says:

    Makes me wonder what is going to happen to other local TV stations?

    I suspect many will not last very long.

  20. 20
    broderick crawford says:

    Yes Growlie as you can see from London Chav s comment above — not all Londoners go to work … lots are on bennies .

    And even THEY can t be arsed to watch London Dead !

  21. 21
    broderick crawford says:


    Yes Anonymous I am a big fan of Mr Clegg.
    Being his personal chef I prepared his usual three course meal plus nuts and liqueurs at the captains table one evening some 90 years ago since which time he has not been seen on sea or sky having deserted his ship with all crew plus even the rats.

  22. 22
    broderick crawford says:

    No it s financed by Ledbedev .

    Ex KGB wallah who runs those two other organs of undiluted profitability

    The Independent and its little brother The “I”

    Mind you the Evening Standard is making a profit …. it s free.

  23. 23
    Francis Urquhart says:

    I thought ‘Wake up Britain’ was the fictional TV station in Bridget Jones Diary? Good job they didn’t waste too much time thinking of an original name.

  24. 24
    broderick crawford says:

    London Dead Should be nationalised and twinned with
    BBC Radio Five Dead .

    Twin pillars of rabid leftie plebeian indifference.

  25. 25

    Maybe they should abandon the TV broadcast format & do it as a stage performance.
    Kings Head iin Islington seats at least 50 & has a good record for alternative theatre. Sure they could put bacon sandwiches on the bar menu, if asked.

  26. 26
    Column No. 5 says:

    Is it doing better than the local TV station Bod Geldof ran at a cost of £1.5 million to council tax payer, the appropriately named Kent TV.

  27. 27
    World War Three says:

    I suppose drivel like this distracts the 99% from what the end game in the Ukraine could develop into wish we had a prime minister and foreign secretary with some gonads and independent thought.

  28. 28

    Sounds like London Went……some place else. Donnit?

  29. 29
    Anonymous says:

    this blog is just a flypaper for mi5

  30. 30
    Anonymous says:

    this blog is a flypaper for mi5

  31. 31
    Kick the foreign city of London out of England says:

    If they only broadcast in English, how will the good people of our fair capital city understand it ?

  32. 32
    RightwinggitRedux says:

    How many viewers did you have when you started, Guido?

    QVC had zero viewers (probably still do according to stats), and they are coining it.

  33. 33
    The last white man to be called Winston says:

    Maggie had more balls than Cameron and Hague put together

  34. 34
    Liar.Politiicans says:

    Too many quite new repeats from other TV channels. Some crappy football / stunts show, “Headline London” discussion show is at the stupid time of 1230 – same slot that BBC’s Daily Politics lives in.

    There is no Unique Selling Point with the channel, other than the odd show being filmed in / around London (especially the entertainment section).

    No viewer videos to air their views like “local” TV does in say the USA.

    Lots of compression in the video and audio.

    Why tune in?

  35. 35
    Disgusted of Neasden says:

    I hadn’t heard of it until this. Obviously no publicity budget. They owe you a bung for the mention, Guido.

    We watched about half of Not the One Show (so 4,003 viewers tonight). OK, but Production style seems aimed at the 20-30 market, so I doubt it will be a regular channel for me – except the re-run of Twenty Twelve.

  36. 36

    Lots of people dont have kids, which I assume makes mornings 1million times easier. TV in the kitchen while cooking and eating breakfast, simple

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