March 5th, 2014

MailOnline Takes Over Metro Website

Surprise news this afternoon as Mail Online announces it is to merge with the Metro website:

“DMG media today announces the integration of  and MailOnline, effective immediately. The move will accelerate the development of  and let it capitalise on MailOnline’s commercial, editorial and technical expertise, building on the fantastic momentum achieved to dateWe look forward to welcoming ’s content, sales and development teams to MailOnline.”

Which means a load more London traffic…


  1. 1
    Country boy says:

    Who cares? Real people don’t live in London.

  2. 2
    Harridan Harpic says:

    Oh goodie, more jubblies on the Metro then.

  3. 3
    Duty Pędant says:

    Which means a load more London traffic…

    Given white flight, what other languages is it available in?

  4. 4
    Build a Wall at Watford Gap says:

    You cared enough to click on the story and comment.

    High time pikey northerns showed some gratitude to those in the capital who fund their public services.

  5. 5
    Margaret Hodge says:

    Ed Miliband to rename himself
    Ed “DailyMail”, all one word

  6. 6
    Bush Meat says:

    At least we can buy proper horsemeat up here.

  7. 7
    She struck first says:

  8. 8
    Country boy says:

    Bollocks. I live in the Thames valley.

  9. 9
    Persona non grata says:

    Ashton conversation on Sky now.

  10. 10
    Shakes dust off heels says:

    I “flighted” in 1979. When I visit London now it’s like some other planet. I’m quite often the only white person in the tube carriage.

  11. 11
    Diane Abbot says:


  12. 12
    May 2015 says:

    Ed Miliband to rename himself “Prime Minister”

  13. 13
    Voice of reason says:

  14. 14
    altruism in industry says:

    One thing that I learnt very early on in life is that people can learn the words of what a thing means and they can understand the words in a context and speak coherently about it but they do not understand what it means.
    for example if I say that I have a patriotic feeling, I am using a word that people understand but they may well not understand what I mean.
    People have all kinds of experiences in life and try to make sense of how they think things are compared with things that happen, not only by understanding of a thing in words but also in an immediate way.
    This is why politicians are so full of bullshit, they know some of the words but it seems often they have no idea what they are talking about.

  15. 15
    June 2015 says:

    UK to rename itself, EU latrine.

  16. 16
    Persona non grata says:

    Watch this guy, up before the Human rights commission, tears them a new one, impressive.

  17. 17
    Tell Tale Sign 1 says:

    A hook for a hand.

  18. 18
    George Moonbat says:

    Climate change deniers going underground? I hope the roof caves in.

  19. 19
    Lewis Carroll says:

    “When I use a word,” Humpty Dumpty said, in rather a scornful tone, “it means just what I choose it to mean- neither more nor less.”

    “The question is,” said Alice, “whether you can make words mean so many different things.”

    “The question is,” said Humpty Dumpty, “which is to be master-that’s all.”

    Alice was too much puzzled to say anything; so after a minute Humpty Dumpty began again. “They’ve a temper some of them- particularly verbs: they’re the proudest- adjectives you can do anything with, but not verbs- however, I can manage the whole lot of them! Impenetrability! That’s what I say!”

  20. 20
    Harriet Harman's Nightmare says:

    If the DM could rid itself of “if you don’t eat the right muesli, you are not fit for society” attitude, it would be perfect.

    It is a decent read!

  21. 21
    March 2014 says:

    EU to rename itself, US can carrier (demoted from can opener)

  22. 22
    Fucki Jizzlam says:

    Good man. As American rappers would say, muzees can suck a dick up.

  23. 23
    C O (Ξ5) says:

    Can you hear the distant sounds of glasses chinking in the K’remlin ?

  24. 24
    David Cameron says:

    If they could do more spreads featuring young men who have recently come of age, that would suit me.

  25. 25
    Harman PIE says:

    Could I please ask that posters refrain from the vicious slandering of Patrick Rock a fine upstanding member of the political class. He may have some unusual and colourful (but completely harmless) pastimes but that’s no reason for this ongoing torrent of abuse. He is a valued member of our community.

  26. 26
    Ellie-Mae (9) says:

    You couldn’t get in a tube carriage.

  27. 27
    Old Blue Eyes says:


  28. 28
    Tony Blair is a war criminal says:

    I miss the underwear posters on the escalators

  29. 29
    ʍȫʊʂʂȁ ҞϴџṦṦậ says:

    You forget this is a ‘Christian’ country, Andy.

    And if you’re so dissatisfied with good old Blighty, fuck off to Saudi Arabia, where they cater for your religion and the weather’s better too.

  30. 30
    Tony Blair is a war criminal says:

    Stop electing Scottish socialists for a start.

  31. 31
    Canada is fucking shit, and that video shows it says:

    That’s Canada for you. Fucking gay retards who are thoroughly repugnant.

    Not Ezra, but the ped0 shit-brains in their government and on their ‘human rights’ commissions etc. Utter fucking c’unts.

  32. 32
    Skeleton bob says:

    BBC3 axed. Well it’s a start.

  33. 33
    ʍȫʊʂʂȁ ҞϴџṦṦậ says:

    It’s not known as the Hate Mail for nothing, you know.

  34. 34
    Anonnyouse says:

    Funny hat
    Dressed as Jedi
    Shiny patches on knees
    Drives huge people-carrier full of silent women and girls in Friday night rush-hour

  35. 35
    Steve from Fazakerley says:

    We prefer the Liverpool Echo up here…

  36. 36
    David Cameron says:


    Hattie, that pie recipe you gave me the other day. Tried some last night, really gave me the horn. Have you got any more ?

  37. 37
    nell says:

    Isn’t denier something to do with stockings?

  38. 38
    Sir William Wayde says:

    And there, boys and girls, you have the molehill from which a huge mountain of tedious semiology was made.

  39. 39
    What about us says:

    No one in Central or the West could give a flying fig about London either

  40. 40
    Blue Peter Goldfish says:

    “I like the Walrus best,” said Alice, “because you see he was a little sorry for the poor oysters.”

    “He ate more than the Carpenter, though,” said Tweedledee. “You see he held his handkerchief in front, so that the Carpenter couldn’t count how many he took: contrariwise.”

    “That was mean!” Alice said indignantly. “Then I like the Carpenter best—if he didn’t eat so many as the Walrus.”

    “But he ate as many as he could get,” said Tweedledum.

    This was a puzzler. After a pause, Alice began, “Well! They were both very unpleasant characters—”

  41. 41
    Gary Bloke says:

    MailOnline is a very poor product. I think that teenage techies with English as a second language turn it out and that no one in charge at DMGT ever looks at it to see how bad it is.

    The reports are riddled with errors, the captions are laughable, the headlines add more errors and the index-page puffs and headlines top the lot for awfulness.

  42. 42
    C O (Ξ5) says:

    That went well then.

  43. 43
    Podiceps says:

    So it’s Dave of the cover ups. Patrick Rock and the immigration report

  44. 44
    Oscar Winner says:

    Shouldn’t ‘Stratfor’ have a ‘d’ on the end?

  45. 45
    What ? says:

    Is that why it has so many readers?

  46. 46
    Gooey Blob says:

    Calling all fruitcakes! Are you tired of typing out your hate-filled comments in forums, blog posts and comment sections around the internet? Well, help is at hand! Next time you’re intent on posting your rabid bile on an otherwise innocent Telegraph article about the England cricket selectors, simply cut and past the text below to save time:

    Blah blah bloody immigrants. Blah blah bum sex. Blah blah gay marriage. Blah blah bum sex. Blah blah LibLabCon. Blah blah bum sex. Blah blah David Icke for PM. Blah blah bum sex. Blah blah voteUkip.

    Or, if you prefer to comment at The Grauniad:

    Blah blah BabyeatingTories. Blah Blah Eton toffs. Blah blah food banks. Blah blah privatised the NHS. Blah blah tuition fees. Blah blah DailyFail. Blah blah Andy Coulson. Blah blah allThatcher’sfault.

  47. 47
    What ? says:

    And your preferred newspaper is?

  48. 48
    jgm2 says:

    I wouldn’t bet on it. Labour only 4% lead with tax cuts to come.

  49. 49
    David Cameron says:

    It is what was uncovered that is the problem.

  50. 50
    jgm2 says:


    Fucking hilarious.

    Talk about crying like a little girl.

  51. 51
    C O (Ξ5) says:

    Fairly direct:

    Usual waffle about protecting R speakers descending into Godwin.

    Key reason for war missed:

    4) Need to justify to R-People defence budget increases.

  52. 52
    P l e b says:

    ’Jose Manuel Barroso, president of the European Commission, has unveiled proposals for the EU to give Ukraine €11bn over the next two years’

    Is Ukraine in the EU?

  53. 53
    jgm2 says:

    Good one. Who said the Religion of Peace had no sense of humour?

  54. 54
    Pleb says:

    ’Jose Manuel Barroso, president of the European Commission, has unveiled proposals for the EU to give Ukraine €11bn over the next two years’

    Is Ukraine in the EU?

  55. 55
    Anonymous says:

    Hopefully Metro can make further ground in concert with the Mail in their necessary and righteous battle.

    – Paedofinder General

  56. 56
    David Cameron says:

    Hattie tells me that I should join NAMBLA. Can I expense that ?

  57. 57
    C O (Ξ5) says:

    Better question:

    Is the EU in the R-Fed ?

  58. 58
    stuff you guardianista losers says:


    The Mail goes from strength to strength because it delivers content that the public actually wants to read.

  59. 59
    Anon. says:

    Ukraine is bankrupt and has been on IMF lifesaver funds for years, is always on the edge of bankruptcy, corruption is widespread and endemic. One wonders what the Commissariat thinks it’s doing

  60. 60
    altruism in industry says:

    yes well, I recall some Russian general wotsit been asked what is the defence budget and he replied ” We don’t have one”

  61. 61
    A Reader says:

    By your grammar and tone sir, should you not be posting on Labour List ?

    Please remember to include the TM logo on: allThatcher’sfault™

  62. 62
    Anon. says:

    Ukraine is bank’rupt and has been on IMF lifesaver funds for years, is always on the edge of bank’ruptcy, corruption is widespread and endemic. One wonders what the Commissariat thinks it’s doing

  63. 63
    Alf G says:

    Yeah it’s called dumbing down.

  64. 64
    Hapless Commuter says:

    But the Metro is so shite you’re wasting your time reading it for free

  65. 65 says:

    Last year at PMQ’s,Tom Watson implored Cameron to investigate a paedophile ring that reached into the very heart of government.
    The internet has been buzzing with a top government minister involvement and now an arrest of a man very close to the PM.
    I hope Tom is granted another question and hopefully if we can get an answer from Cameron for what reason he has tried to hide the arrest of this man.

  66. 66
    Commuter says:

    But it does have a suduko

  67. 67 says:

    Last year at PMQ’s,Tom Watson implored Cameron to investigate a pae’dophile ring that reached into the very heart of government.
    The internet has been buzzing with a top government minister involvement and now an arrest of a man very close to the PM.
    I hope Tom is granted another question and hopefully if we can get an answer from Cameron for what reason he has tried to hide the arrest of this man.

  68. 68
    C O (Ξ5) says:

    Appeasing R’ussia.

  69. 69
    David Cameron says:

    Nope. Tom W’atson is off my ‘can ask a question’ list.

  70. 70
    Dave - the pervert's best friend says:

    A truly savage indictment of the quality of postings on this blog.

    All of us – and I do mean all of us – should reflect on this powerful piece and decide how we can live more meaningful and constructive.

    Meanwhile Gooey Blob, why don’t you just fuck off die, you’re obviously a complete wanker.

  71. 71
    Dave - the pervert's best friend says:

    Wankers Weekly

  72. 72
    Patrick Rock, Downing St. says:

    This is fantastic news!

  73. 73
    Saaf Landaner says:

    Oh OK, so you’re going to hand your subsidies back yeah?

  74. 74
    Null hypothesis says:

    Good man!

  75. 75
    Judge Dreadful says:

    Good man, indeed. The Canadians need their bottoms spanking.

  76. 76
    T May says:

    Yankee go home

  77. 77
    The British Public says:


  78. 78
    Tim Yeo-yo says:

    Securing a cheap supply of sluty whores for Brussels. Have you seen how hot some of those Ukrainian birds are?

  79. 79

    You just cannot reason with these self appointed arseholes, how he managed to stop himself reaching over that desk and ripping out her throat is beyond my comprehension!

  80. 80
    Aparat says:

    I suppose if the Evening Standard (Daily Mail) can work with the Independent (Metro), then anything is possible.

  81. 81
    Anonymous says:

    So that will mean in reality 52% coming from Germany and about 23% from the UK as being the only significant net contributors the EU budget.

  82. 82
    broderick crawford says:

    c an i still buy a two headed lamb if i go to north wales as was the case immediately after chernobyl ??

    I thought fuk u shima may have made them available again assuming the min of ag and fish * have not been culling and burning them all at birth as they did last time to keep the happening iff the front pages …

    (* or whatever acronym the old MAFF is known under these days )

  83. 83
    Loosehead says:

    Vlad the Invader. Best. Headline. Ever.

  84. 84
    Oh well says:

    Better luck next time.

  85. 85
    Oh well says:

    ..or fiddling the accounts again…

  86. 86
    inside out says:

    British education init.

  87. 87

    Does anyone care does it matter both papers are full of sh*t like most of their journalists. Lets face it both are rags not newspapers the stories are rarely news worthy and often feature made up bigoted views by ignorant people working on their personal agendas. The only result of this is more room for the spiteful bigots such as Hitchens to spout their lies and hate!

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