December 5th, 2013

IDS Responds to Balls Jibe

The Work and Pensions secretary’s reaction to Balls’ “IDS – In Deep Shambles” line today.


161 Comments

  1. 1
    Mitch says:

    He said: “IDS in deep Sh…ambles”

    Was about his best joke.

  2. 2
    lescrompsblogg says:

    And that’s the fuck he gives

    • 3
      Arnold Golightly says:

      Why the hell should he? If people are living in houses that are too big for them and I’m paying for it then jog on.

      • 5
        Kiss My Big Hairy Swingers says:

        Seconded, Arnold.

      • 7
        Georgie Osborne's Blue and White Army says:

        Bailiffs are going to be busy in 2014.

        • 57
          Psyche the Dog says:

          If everything is rented including the house flat etc the bailiffs are going to have big problems as are all those companies who hire to the public, most owned or controlled by Tory backers, the increase in homeless families maybe they will become “travellers” to add the Iorish and Roma in this country, daft as it sounds not everyone can afford to become bankrupt.

        • 94
          Small Business says:

          There are a number of firms who owe me money saying that their cash flow is being buggered up by the government not paying them on time or according to their contracts. I would love to see them sending the bailliffs into Whitehall and confiscating a few desks

          • Psyche the Dog says:

            You could try a CCJ against them after first sending a final demand notice, they probably settle their own bills to those who are daft enough to give them credit, remember the the fiasco of the unpaid wine bill, they have form

      • 28
        Banned says:

        Thirded Arnold

  3. 4
    Churchill says:

    Who’s that nodding dog behind him?

  4. 6
    Georgie Osborne's Blue and White Army says:

    IDS is not in a shambles.

    It is the claimants who are in the shambles as they are going to have to face the real world now

    • 22
      The Real World says:

      You are all going to have to face me. The silver lining in the cloud you call ‘too much benefits’ was that the scum never needed to form hunting packs. They lived in their own houses with enough bennies to keep them idle. Now they are all going to be forced to live together. If you think they will all form legitimate job search crews then you are about to be given a harsh lesson in human nature.

      • 63
        Jimmy Hill says:

        Workhouses are the future.

        Cheap clean and user friendly with kids getting a square Jamie Oliver styled meal each day.

        • 117
          (Not so)Dangerous Brian says:

          And then oop the chimneys with the little b*ggers.

          • The Real World says:

            Please keep deluding yourself that the class of scum beneath you will suddenly know it’s place. Keep deluding yourself that the police will do anything to protect you from them. Keep deluding yourself that you have nothing in common with them and everything in common with the upperclasses. You are a thousand good choices away from the classes you aspire to be part of but only one or two bad choices away from the scum you mock.

          • comp kid says:

            I bet you’re a posh twat like Harman,Cooper and Hunt, who feels guilty about the educational benefits and privileges afforded to you.
            Those who shout loudest about class and wealth always are.

          • The Real World says:

            Nope I’m a right wing diehard like the rest of you. I just happen to know a lot of the scum that you wrongly assume will just know thier place when SHTF. Notice how I call them scum. I’m not being ironic. They are scum. And they are going to form packs and they are going to come for us. But I don’t know everything so maybe I am wrong. Maybe they will just accept a life of no prospects or luxury. Maybe they will start doffing thier caps to you as they shine your shoes. Here’s hoping.

          • Jesus says:

            Did you not read the “parable of the three talents”?

            I really haven’t got much time for people who don’t make anything of themselves. Give you the most complex mechanism in the universe and you spend your time watching afternoon telly.

  5. 10
    Malcolm Muggeridge says:

    If marriage is per se a marvellous institution why should it be incentivised through the tax system ?

    • 15
      Georgie Osborne's blue and white army says:

      Marriage is a noble end in itself and is fully deserving of recognition in the tax system.

      Remember too our intention is “spending less on welfare”;

      When we stop Child Benefit in its entirety married people will like to have a little sweetener in their tax coding.

      • 74
        Psyche the Dog says:

        What Georgie does not say is that the the rebate will only be at the standard rate of income tax.

    • 18
      One Term Dave says:

      I say Bumsex marriage needs all the incentives we can afford through the tax system, as does our £12Bn for the Indian space program to Mars old bean.

      Toodle pip!

      • 33
        OUT DAVE OUT DAVE OUT DAVE OUT says:

        Surely the bumsexers should get a bigger marriage allowance than ordinary hetero marriages, to acknowledge their bravery in coming out in support of Dave?

        • 60
          Arse from Elbow says:

          Or for enduring the pain of bumsex.

          • Tom Daley -- the Beeb's new favourite little gay -- (sorry Owen you're so yesterday) says:

            It didn’t hurt that much, with the injections and extra KY

          • Gandhi's revenge says:

            Give em all a good strong curry, it will remind them all what the arse was meant for.

          • Psyche the Dog says:

            Or not increasing the population in an over crowded country, the education would be lower, one draw back is that there would not be a pool of unemployed to fill the armed forces with squaddies and cannon fodder to Cams would have to fight his own wars.

          • Jesus says:

            One million dead from HIV/AIDS, that’s all I’m sayin’

          • GeoffM says:

            A million dead from bumsex?

            You’d think they would learn by now.

    • 19
      It won't hurt says:

      When did the married man’s tax allowance get stopped? It was very popular.

  6. 11
    Tom Daley says:

    Chase me!

  7. 12
    Screwed Taxpayer says:

    Never mind this pathetic idiot.

    What about the £890m. outstanding student debt sold to a debt management company for only £160m. ?

    If the company makes any sort of normal commercial effort it will easily double if not treble its outlay.

    YET ANOTHER LIBLABCON TOTAL FUCK UP

    • 21
      Eccles says:

      Perhaps we can nationalize it back?

      • 32
        Hannibal from Carthage says:

        You have a hope in hell of recovering that money.

        Most of it is owed by the brightest graduates most of whom are working and surfing in places like Sydney and San Francisco.

        You will not be seeing them back in the UK.

        • 44
          Wonger & Co., Specialist Debt Extractors says:

          Do they want their current “ethical” employers to know that they are debtors? If that doesn’t work, we’ll send the boys round.

        • 85
          Psyche the Dog says:

          Dave & Georgie have not thought of that one out, plus those who may not get a job that pays enough and they will never pay off, I think a student loan is the only debt you cannot write off if you go bankrupt, accountant types might like to check that one out.

        • 149
          FFS says:

          Most of it is owed by girls that only went to uni for the parties and spent their time missing lectures on “the history of modern dance” before taking up jobs on the counter in Next dreaming of wedding dresses.

  8. 13
    Deluded says:

    If marriage is a marvellous institution why should it be incentivised through the tax system ?

    • 89
      Psyche the Dog says:

      Because Fawksey, Dave & Gideon say so

    • 106
      yes ukip can says:

      Ask all the foreign countries that have it.

    • 150
      FFS says:

      To make up for the fact that when you get divorced your ex-wife who is on officially a “low-income” can claim child tax credits and various other bennies.

      • 155
        Psyche the Dog says:

        If you earn enough and wealthy enough the ex will take you to the cleaners, especially if kids are involved.

  9. 14
    Me.... says:

    Did the BBC move the cameras off before Ed Ballsup actually exploded? I feared for his health (& sanity). Have you EVER seen anyone that red in the bloody face?

    • 25
      i think says:

      Squeaker kept interrupting to give Balls chance to
      catch his breath and lower his blood pressure.

      • 135
        broderick crawford says:

        HIS NAME IS NOT MISTER SPEAKER

        IT IS MISTER BUBBLE AND SQUEAKER

        BE SO GOOD AS TO USE THE CORRECT FORM OF ADDRESS !

    • 91
      Psyche the Dog says:

      The reason Ed has a red face is because he has been banging his head listening to Gideon and co

  10. 16
    Dead and Burried says:

    FFS some thick Welsh politician reckons that the early death rate in his area means that State pension age should not rise.

    Yes he is correct they are dying early now But this is legacy from previous industry (industry like Labour backed mining) and by 2030 when the rise happens this legacy will no longer exist.

    • 23
      Georgie Osborne's Blue and White Army says:

      It was our Maggie who closed down the mines.

      • 27
        you're wrong says:

        No it was Scargill.

        • 36
          WelshOriginal says:

          Actually, Callaghan and Wilson closed more mines than Thatcher. Check it out.

          • BarryW says:

            Under the Minister Tony Benn [aka Anthony Wedgewood-Benn 2nd Viscount]
            who also proclaimed that he would make electricity too cheap to meter

        • 95
          Psyche the Dog says:

          It was both of them, they needed each other, both had to win, like 2 dogs each pulling on a stich at opposite ends, neither giving in, Maggie wanting to win an election, and Scargill wanting political power.

          • FFS says:

            It was neither of them. Statistics show that the decline in coal production in the UK was more or less on a straight line after WWII, regardless of government in power.

            Scargill was fighting a war he could only lose and a lot of miners lost out on a years salary for nowt, as well as being left high and dry by subsequent governments that have considered them a bit of an embarrasment.

          • Psyche the Dog says:

            FFS it always seemed a little daft to go on strike at the time that they did, it seemed odd then and still does.

      • 35
        Anonymous says:

        Wilson and Liebour closed more mines than Thatcher.

        • 38
          BBC says:

          Shhhh!

        • 51
          Evans the coal says:

          Even if a lot of the mines opened up again does anyone think the locals would go down them? Suspect that they would be sending out search parties for Poles and Ukrainians.

          • Psyche the Dog says:

            Unfortunately a mine cannot be just opened at the click of a switch, once the shafts have collased and the roadways below have collasped, it would cost millions of pounds to sink a new shaft and drive new roadways to coalseams, plus all that machinery left down there would have to be avoided. “Wet” pits would have to be pumped out, There are few miners and mining engineers left from the old mining days, the list is endless.

          • Psyche the Dog says:

            Check it out Geedes, I have never worked down a pit but I used to listen to some of the old miners and mining engineers, I live in an ex mining area and there are is very little indication that a lot of mines ever existed, most of the industries that relied on coal and coal products (tar production, benzines etc) have gone much cleaner now.

    • 39
      John Bellingham says:

      The world’s first comprehensive old age pension scheme was introduced in Germany by Bismark in 1889. The qualification age was 70. The first UK system was introduced in 1908 under the Liberals and the qualification age was also 70 and the recipients had to be British subjects and have resided in Britain for 20 years before pensionable age was reached. Lunatics and convicts were excluded for ten years after their release.
      The reason for the entry age of 70 was that, at the time, 90% of people would have died. The male life expectancy was 50 and thus the non-contributory scheme was affordable.

      • 46
        Jimmy Hill says:

        Old miners are still living and breeding into their eighties now.

        That is the challenge facing us.

        • 65
          John Bellingham says:

          IF Maggie closed the pits in the eighties (I know she didn’t but lets keep to the myth) and the average age of a miner in 1985 was 43, their average age now would be 71. So it seems odd that so many men in their 20s and 30s pop up on TV whinging about pit closures. Those “old miners” are probably still alive because they were saved from pneumoconiosis by cutting their coal-dust breathing careers short by twenty years.

      • 126
        bergen says:

        Bismark used 65 as retirement age. It appears that he was told that German life expectancy was 66 and he ruled that the typical German should have a year in retirement to wind up his affairs.

    • 43
      Market Forces says:

      I closed the mines.

  11. 30
    Fishy says:

    BBC bod has chosen to read an e-mail saying that people are not fit to work, retain their health to be able to work to 70.

    It follows, doesn’t it? that as longevity increases, people by definition healthier and fitter for longer.

    I reckon that I am around 10 years younger than my Dad was, at the same age.

    Remember that ads from the 1960′s, ‘Philosan fortifies the over Forties’ – people would laugh at that notion now.

    • 45
      Pam Fritter says:

      I’m going to have to claim jobseekers allowance till I’m 70?
      For fucks sake.

      • 72
        John Bellingham says:

        Remember that jobseekers doubles to $129 per fortnight after the age of 60 yrs and 6 months, slightly higher than the State pension.

    • 54
      Three score years and ten says:

      Life expectancy could in fact go down as a result of obesity and the sedentary lifestyles kids have these days.
      Also if they don’t discover any new antibiotics soon premature death will return to 19th century levels.

      • 73
        John Bellingham says:

        Remember that life expectancy figures are skewed by improvements in child mortality. Fewer kids today die before their fifth birthday than at anytime in history. They only take up the Old Holborn roll-ups, the cider and the Pizzas after their fifth birthday.

      • 103
        Fishy says:

        If life expectancy reduces so will the pensions age in line with the new formula

    • 137
      broderick crawford says:

      WILFRRD PICKLES SAYS

      I WOULDN T LAUGH AT IT

      I ADVERTISED FLAMING PHYLOSAN AND NOW I M FREAKINGWELL DEAD !!

  12. 31
  13. 37
    Note to Jimmy says:

    • There was NO double-dip recession!

  14. 40
    Dirty Chancing says:

  15. 41
    Steve Miliband says:

    So what is labours economic policy?Did I miss it?

  16. 42
    A reporter from the Daily Planet says:

    Sources tell me that Edward Balls may well be gone this side of Xmas.

    The smarmy young Scot and Miillitwit are not happy bunnies

    Remember you heard it here first.

    • 82
      Axe The Telly Tax &Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

      SUN headline “Miliband To Have Balls Out By Christmas” :-)

      • 128
        Will says:

        lets start a petition to keep him the sight of him making a slashing motion across his neck will be worth at least 10 seats to the opposition in the next election.

  17. 48
    Fuck the LibLabCon says:

    BBC Labour shills frothing at the month a bit.

  18. 50
    The BBC says:

    Balls dominated Osborne in his reply to the autumn statement. Balls is the finest shadow chancellor the country has ever seen.

    • 55
      JoePublic says:

      …..and long mat he remain shadow chancellor.

    • 61
      Ed Ballzzz says:

      Cost of living crisis, cost of living crisis, cost of living crisis, cost of……….

      • 67
        i don't n eed no doctor says:

        You forgot Andy Burnham’s new buzz word….CHAOS…. Expect other labour dummies to follow suit.

        • 90
          retardEd Miliband says:

          The chaoth cauthed by the cotht of living cwithith.

        • 93
          nellnewman. says:

          ‘chaos’ is a very appropriate word for burnham to keep spouting, given the deadly chaos he brought to the nhs on his watch. I hope bullyballs stays as shadow chancellor and burnham as shadow health minister until 2015 election – I can’t think of any better reasons not to vote labour!

          • Commie McCluskey, leader of the Labour Party and owner of Ed Miliband, says:

            “I can’t think of any better reasons not to vote labour!”

            I can.

  19. 56
    i don't n eed no doctor says:

    Balls must realise just how bad he was today. I would compare Balls today to Gordon Brown’s realisation that he was the most useless PM ever. If labour stick with Balls what will it say about Miliband.

    • 66

      When did Gordon Brown realise that he was the most useless PM ever?

      I’m surprised if I missed such an admission from him. Had he done so, we would not be paying him to sit in the HoC when he does not even do that. In addition, had he truly realised the enormity of his abject uselessness, nay gross and wilful harm, one would at least have expected to have read about a glass of whisky and a smoking revolver.

      • 71
        i don't n eed no doctor says:

        Brown has said that he is no longer an MP. Realisation doesn’t have to be by personal admission, it is a general consensus.

        • 86

          Completely agree that it is a general consensus but Brown clearly thinks he was still a financial genius who saved the world, so on that I cannot agree with you. Where has there been any expression of contrition or remorse from him? Absolutely none.

          If we do not thoroughly hold Labour to account for their persistent wrecking of our economy every single time they have ever been in office, from their very formation, then we will only deserve to see them holding the reins of power again.

          • retardEd Miliband says:

            The latht Labour government did abtholutely nothing wrong. It wath a time of pwothpewity, happineth and gwothe, and all wath wight with the world. Today, of courth, we have the cotht of living cwithith, which wath cauthed by Thatcher before the latht Labour government, and the pwrethent Tory-led government of heartleth thcoundwelth.

            Do not attempt to thmear uth again.

          • No wonder Tom Daley wants to have his babies says:

            Magisterial – as always.

          • * Since we were talking about Brown and
            * Since it is generally accepted that Brown is a сunt, then

            It can be readily understood by all how smears go with the territory in his case.

          • aka says:

            Your second paragraph deserves to be distributed free to every home in the land, embroidered into framed samplers, taught as economic catechism.

          • You are very kind but I must admit to having been inspired by Gustave Courbet’s L’Origine du monde of 1886.

            To pursue further your own great idea, one could validly state that all of life starts here.

      • 125
        Sick of the greed and lies(still) says:

        Has Gordon said if he is standing again in 2015? Several of the MP’s that are standing down have disclosed this information but I can’t remember seeing it about Gordon.

        • 134
          The sooner the Scots, Welsh, Parkies, Polecats etc all fuck off the better says:

          With a bit of luck the Scots will have fucked off — so his constituency won’t exist any more — along with those of all the other Scottish Liebour wankers.

    • 77
      Axe The Telly Tax &Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

      That he hasn’t the Balls to sack him :-)

  20. 59
    Spongeballs SquareEd says:

    Labours previous economic policy copied from America.

  21. 75
    Lance Corporal Bill Bloggs (retired) says:

    You have had a 20% sterling currency devaluation, you have got an extra 1.4 million people in employment and have taken the scalpel to State spending.

    Yet the growth is truly anaemic and national debt is not reducing.

    What is the matter with you people?

    • 81
      Axe The Telly Tax &Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

      We haven’t even taken even a scalpel to State spending let alone a chainsaw.

      • 88
        Wait - what! says:

        Agreed, cuts in state spending should not be measured by the volume of the left/BBC/Guardian but by how much tax has actually reduced.

      • 98
        London says:

        Agreed. Public Sector spending continues to bloat and bloat and bloat

        • 129
          Will says:

          most public spending is spent on the elderly via pension and the NHS and other social services. This is because many of them have earned it and paid into the system.

          try looking it up.

          • Rob says:

            What’s this “paid into the system” nonsense? Everything you mention is paid for out of current taxation. There is no element of getting out what you pay in.

            It is a massive Ponzi scheme. When the money runs out, your ‘investment’ will have disappeared because it never actually existed.

          • FFS says:

            Nope. Most of the people that actually paid net into the system have private pensions and private health-care.

            The state is funded by the top 10% of earners and the rest put in less than they take out.

            You look it up.

  22. 76
    i don't n eed no doctor says:

    Crisis this, crisis that, labour’s mantra. Today the country has seen labour’s crisis in the form of Ed Balls.

  23. 84
    cheche says:

    WORST STORMS IN SIXTY YEARS

    Can I be the first to say climate change

    • 92
      retardEd Miliband says:

      Thith thtorm is cauthed by the Tory-led government’th cutth and ith contwibuting to the cotht of living cwithith.

      Oh yeth.

      • 108
        Too Far says:

        Bit windy here in Sussex, no sign of a storm. maybe climate change hasn’t reached us yet!!

        • 121
          Blowing Willies says:

          Bum sex can cause wind especially in Brighton. Shit storms then tend to follow through afterwards.

    • 116
      Axe The Telly Tax &Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

      OMG it’s cold & windy in December!

      Let’s pile more taxes on petrol,electricity and gas just like the Yanks and Chinese aren’t doing…err…

    • 132
      Throw another peasant on the fire says:

      We’ve gone back the same climate as 1953? I thought that’s what we wanted?

  24. 87
    Brillo says:

    ANSWER THE QUESTION!!!!!!!!

  25. 109
    Ed Miliband says:

    Under Labour, we will ban smears under the NHS.

  26. 112
    81lly Kebæb says:

    LAST !

  27. 120
    Displaced Brummie says:

    IDS did a good Balls impersonation, there!

  28. 124
    Hoots! It's Clown says:

    The weather forecast was correct!

    There’s been a hell of a p0rn-surge at my house! ;)

  29. 127
    albacore says:

    Fawkes, pretty please, quit legitimising these guys
    As if it mattered which one told the bigger lies
    Any promise from any LibLabCon spare part
    Is a come-on from a shagged-out old E U tart

  30. 131
    Fishy says:

    The appalling Chris Leslie on Brillo’s show refused to confirm that pensions wouldn’t be excluded from a future benefit’s cap.

    This seems to suggest that Labour has it’s eyes on private sector pensions again in that if you’ve paid for your workplace pension and it is in payment, under Labour, if that turns out to be above the £££ cap you will not get an OAP even if you have made all of your NI contributions.

    Leslie wriggled and wriggled on this, no doubt it is in Red Ed’s mind to equalise the money that most retired people get, irrespective of whether they have worked for it or have sat on their arses all of their life.

    • 136
      Benefiteer says:

      Too right — vote liebour — you know it makes sense.

      P.S. Or vote for that cnut Camoron if you like — there’s no real difference.

    • 159
      HEARDITALLSEENITALLBEFORE says:

      Labour will always seek to punish those who aren’t totally dependent on the state.

      • 161
        Anonymous says:

        That said, it is the Tories/IDS that are out to punish the unemployed. For, as Mail Online reports, a Former soldier had his benefits cut after he volunteered to sell poppies. No Help For Heroes from the Nasty Party.

  31. 139
    Dry cleaning Bill says:

    Bogeyman shoulders swipe

  32. 157
    Tatanya Taylor says:

    Would you prefer Iain Duncan’s Shambles, to Ed’s B@!!$ Up ?

    • 160
      Anonymous says:

      And the winner of the Most Useless Person Of The Last Ten Years goes to IDS. The runners up are William (let’s bomb Syria) Hague and Boris (on a wire) Johnson.


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Rod Liddle on the loony UN sexism special rapporteur:

“There is more sexism in Britain than in any other country in the world, according to a mad woman who has been sent here by the United Nations.

Rashida Manjoo is a part-time professor of law at Cape Town University in the totally non-sexist country of South Africa (otherwise known as Rape Capital Of The World).

Mrs Magoo has been wandering around with her notebook and is appalled by the sexist “boys’ club” culture here, apparently.

I don’t doubt we still have sexism in the UK. But is it worse than in, say, Saudi Arabia, d’you think, honey-lamb? Or about 175 other countries? Get a grip, you doolally old bat.”



orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?


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