August 27th, 2013

Hipster Watson Makes Friends Down Under

Well it looks like the Aussies are just loving having Tom Watson turn up uninvited down under, as “a self-appointed policeman of election coverage”, as The Australian puts it. Maybe it’s his comedy preparation for radio interviews that is making him so popular:

“Instead of coming from a Southbank studio, the show was broadcast live from a footpath in the surf coast town of Torquay. Despite being a former minister, Mr Watson had clearly not checked the details of the interview. And, The Australian understands, despite media help from GetUp!, something was wrong. Mr Watson is a large man with a fondness for double lunches, but his funky frames and hipster shoes show he is not without vanity. He kept darting about trying to avoid The Australian’s photographer Stuart McEvoy yesterday. “He went to go one way and then the other,” McEvoy said. “He kept turning his back and walking the other way.” It was all to do with his outfit. Mr Watson was overheard telling ABC crew he had expected the interview to be in a studio.”

Impartial observers were less than impressed with the coverage:

He couldn’t find his car or driver after the interview either. Going well then…


  1. 1
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    Who ate all the pies, who ate all the pies…

  2. 2
    robert holmes a court says:

    its alimentary dear watson

  3. 3
    a non says:

    Pity about ‘The Australian’ “paywall” Guido.
    Local rags are one thing but how often will one visit a foreign site?

  4. 4

    Lynton Crosby’s business partner in not liking Tom Watson shocker!

  5. 5
    Muffin Top says:

    Hipster !! LMFAO

    Can anyone see the fat lumps hips?

  6. 6
    Anonymous says:

    Haha, former Liberal Party pollster turned lobbyist Mark Textor, “impartial”? Get off it, Guido.

  7. 7
    vanity project says:

    Who’s paying for his trip?

  8. 8
    Call me Dave says:

    We invade countries for less than this.

  9. 9
    Alfred Sherman says:

    Tarmac over Twatson

  10. 10
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    Dave is a dipstick. All he has to do to get the British people behind him and win a landslide in 2015 is to tell the EU to fuck off and sink the Spanish navy & fishing fleet.

    But noooooo he has to get involved in Syria, on the side of the very same jihadist nutters who hacked Lee Rigby’s head off, in broad daylight, in his own home town.

    What a fucking mong Dave is.

    Ditch Dave and Willy Vague and put Priti Patel in as the new leader.

  11. 11
    M Ryutin Sydney Australia says:

    For those who don’t know, GetUp is an Australian organisation set up by (and imitating in every way) Avaaz, the funder for the Watson Australian visit. So far lots of coverage on anti-Murdoch media, including ample coverage on the Australian BBC-twin, the Australian Broadcasting Corporation (ABC).

  12. 12
    Straight Talking Aussie says:

    “a large man with a fondness for double lunches, but his funky frames and hipster shoes show he is not without vanity”

    A self-important fat bastad then

  13. 13
    Straight Talking Aussie says:

    You’re the loon matey, posting Cameron messages on subjects about Tom Watson

  14. 14
    Zaphod Beeblebrox says:

    G’day! “Portly Pom Points Percy at the Porcelain shock!”

  15. 15
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    Guido is working for Cameron you mong, hence this distracting thread.

  16. 16
    Brain dead Brummie says:

    I really appreciate my local MP representing me, on trips abroad. Trips like attending the NI AGM in the USA funded by that lovely Mr Mccluskey, and now this lovely trip to our former penal colony. I wonder just how Mr Watson finds time for all these trips as well as pretending to write a book about himself not to mention trying to destroy the Labour party from the inside, as well as looking after my interests.

    He is that busy I wonder how he finds time to eat.

  17. 17
    Tin Foil Tommy says:


  18. 18
    "Stabilo Boss" says:

    The Australians need to watch out. This man has the reverse Midas touch, everything he touches turns sour. He saw Gordon Brown lose every single election he faced when leader and Ed Miliband’s becoming a laughing stock who probably took comfort in being egged the other day because at least someone recognised him.

  19. 19
    Paniagua v5 says:

    At least he looks more like Putin than Dave.

  20. 20
    Anonymous says:

    He no more looks after your interests as the Pope declares Jihad.

  21. 21
    Steve Coogan (Alpha Poophole) says:

    Watson should get Lord Leveson as his agent.Since being under his wing I’m never off the fucking telly.
    Ah Ha!

  22. 22
    Pôpe Francis says:


  23. 23
    Tom Watson says:

    I have a young intern to nibble on.

  24. 24
    nellnewman says:

    I do hope we’re not paying for his luxury holiday in aussie?!

  25. 25
    An even straighter talking Pom says:

    Or just a plain bastard!

  26. 26
    Tom Watson makes friends down under says:

    Mr Franc and beans meet Mrs Palm and her five lovely daughters.

  27. 27
    Presindto O'Bummer says:

    Lets attack syria the news is a bit slow at the moment, nothing like buildings and people being blown up with stand off missles and of course make sure there are plenty of women and children to film,nothing like a good handring is there?

  28. 28
    Anonymous says:

    Allahu Akbar

    If you want to be precise and not upset the muzzies.

  29. 29
    BBC is shit says:

    Is ABC pump priming Australia for war like our state organ the BBC?

  30. 30
    One Term Dave says:

    FFS are you real DC is the best leader we have ever ever had, even a swivel eyed loon would see it was true. The benefits of his leadership are self evident, lower benefit payments, lower wages and no reduction in bankster bonus payments, whats not to like.

  31. 31
    The BBC are shit says:

    Of course.

  32. 32
    Tower Hamlets last white resident says:

    Fuck the muzzies.

  33. 33
    Tom Fatson says:

    Don’t worry. A union will be hopefully be funding this jolly fat-finding mission.

    Do I mean fact-finding ??…..No.

  34. 34
    Malik Obama says:

    I’m your half brother Hussein, I mean Barry, and I’m international finance officer for the Muslim Brotherhood. So go for it, get rid of secular government in Syria so we can move in.

  35. 35
    BBC are shit says:

    My bad,the BBC ‘are’ shit.

  36. 36
    Keep out of Syria says:

    The BBC, Labour, the Mirror and warmonger Tony Blair are all pushing for military action in Syria.

    There’s nothing they’d like more than seeing the Tories embroiled in an disastrous ruinous conflict in which innocents are slaughtered,our soldiers maimed and Cameron at odds with the vast majority of the British public just before an election.

  37. 37
    Percy says:

    It’s funny but apart from the kempt hair style, it could be either of the two Geedoes

  38. 38
    don't forget says:

    A self important fat bastard having a mid-life crisis.

  39. 39
  40. 40
    Tony Bliars Industrial Shredder and Blender says:

    Can I be of any assistance?

  41. 41
    but more importantly says:

    Did he take his girlfriend?
    And exactly how is this trip helping his constituents?

  42. 42
    Polly Toynbee ate my hamster says:

    Yet another candidate for Chief Tosser of the British Empire. Stephen Fry, Alan Rusbridger, Ed Balls. A vintage field.

    People will look back in years to come and say “we don’t produce w@nkers like that any more”

  43. 43
    Allan, you at t'bar says:

    Aloha haha.

  44. 44
    Paniagua v5 says:

    Good job this lard arse isn’t in charge of defense policy, otherwise he could mistake the launch button for the lunch one.

  45. 45
    Töm Watsön says:

    I sit on my hand for 10 minutes, and then when its really numb it feels like someone else is doing it.

  46. 46
    RED ED - SON OF BROWN says:

    Don’t be harsh. Remember me.

  47. 47
    Will probably be deleted real soon says:

  48. 48
    Harridan Harmanhater says:

  49. 49
    Keep out of Syria says:

    Leave them to it, they will eventually find a solution.

    Its not our problem / Business.

  50. 50
    The enemy of my enemy is my friend (but just this once) says:

    Good for you Abbott

  51. 51
    Tom Fatson says:

  52. 52

    For once Fatbutt we agree but don’t let this become a habit, I have a reputation to up hold.

  53. 53
    V1le disgusting toxic Labour trashed my Country says:

    We need to stay out of the Syrian shithole and leave these savages to sort it out themselves. With any luck they will all exterminate each other and we’ll have less child abuse and problems in our own Country.

  54. 54
    One Term Dave says:

    Diane Abbott joins clamour for not attacking Syria. Another reason why it’s probably a good idea.

  55. 55
    Sir William Waid says:

    How can Watson fill his boots, wearing hipster* shoes.

    *I just looked this term up. It seems to mean shoes of a conventional shape but in crayon colours.

  56. 56
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    Diane Abbott talking sense, am i dreaming?

  57. 57
    Sir William Waid says:

    West Bromwich is quite distinct from Birmingham you know, old bean.

  58. 58
    Tony Blair Millionaire from a yacht in the Mediterranean says:

    It is time we took sides.. my side!

  59. 59
    Jack Dromey (Mrs) says:

    I stick sandpaper onto my finger tips and it feels like my wife is doing it.

  60. 60
    HS2 says:

    Not as far as I’m concerned.

  61. 61
    M Ryutin Sydney Australia says:

    Well Brummie, we know who pays for a lot of Tom’s international travel. He said on the Australian TV Q and A show (pale copy of the UK equivalent and on the ABC – naturally), that his current Australian travel was funded by Avaaz and that it also funded other overseas tours to the USA and Europe etc on his (and Avaaz) self-admitted anti-Murdoch “information” campaigns.

  62. 62
    Tony Blair Millionaire from a yacht in the Mediterranean says:

    We need more dead and maimed British soldiers!
    Preferably white working class ones too, it’s the right thing to do!

  63. 63
    Paniagua v5 says:

    Fatbots Twitter Hacked !!

  64. 64
    simple solutions says:

    To win in 2015 the Tories also need to Stay Out Of Syria, keep on track with the economy and abandon HS2.

  65. 65
    Anonymous says:

    Not on my telly he isn’t.

  66. 66
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:


  67. 67
    Cannibal Leader Of the chemical attack brigade of jihadist martyrs says:

    Yes but spare the women and children they will come in handy later.

  68. 68
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    Time to buy that tenth house eh Tone?

  69. 69
    Heir Merkel says:

    Don’t menshun ze vaw

  70. 70
    pigs might fly says:

    Bloody ‘ell- I actually agree with Diane Abbott!

  71. 71
    The hand of the Lib Dems says:

  72. 72
    Nostradamus says:

    As was predicted.

    Welcome to the Rapture

  73. 73
    Real Reason says:

    Our munitions have a use by date. Simps

  74. 74
    Just a thought says:

    By smear does he mean a Dirty Sanchez?

  75. 75
    Ma­q­boul says:

    Didn’t Neville Chamberlain say something similar? We need to put out the fire before it spreads. This gassing of civilians is not in the best of taste.

  76. 76
    England says:

    + 75% of us

  77. 77
    Rolaaaaaaaand says:

    Always wondered where Roland Browning had ended up……

  78. 78
    Owen Jones says:

    And that applies to you as well mum,I’m a big boy now.
    What’s for tea?

  79. 79
    C.O.Jones says:

    I see the Middle East Peace Envoy is er..

    pushing for war.

  80. 80
    Allan, you at t'bar says:

    Let the barbarians get on with it. After all, it’s the religion of peace piss

  81. 81
    Calamity Clegg, Chief Cockroach says:

    YIPPEE !!!! I’M BACK IN 3rd PLACE !!!

  82. 82
    Socialism Ate My Future says:

    Assad was nearly knighted by good old tony and never forget the love in at number 10 around 2002 if I recall correctly.

    With friends like these hey!

  83. 83
    Ming Campbell says:

    Great news I almost feel 67 again.

  84. 84
    the stench of hypocrisy says:

    Lefties may claim to welcome opposing views
    but in reality they back censorship like that
    proposed by Leveson.

  85. 85
    Jamie Oliver says:

    The only way to eliminate food poverty is to fill the shelves of food banks with culled badgers. #HealthyEating

  86. 86
    Paddy Pantsdown says:

    I’m close to 69.

  87. 87
    Bunch of wankers says:

    Lefties all sat round agreeing with each other is what they consider ‘mature debate’

  88. 88
  89. 89
    C.O.Jones says:

    Good idea.


  90. 90
    Ze Critic says:

    Let’s apply some lateral thinking here shall we?

    If Dave offered to implement HS2 in Syria, he could bung a few billion at them in aid and they could dig up miles of desert to craete a loss-making enterprise. The exchange rate should be in our favour, so the subsidies ought to be cheap. That will save our countryside from destruction.

    If he builds wind farms all over Syria, that would deter low flying strike aircraft and provide power for three camel sheds. Again subsidies would be cheap. War or windfarms -love the soundbyte.

    Let’s get the Milliband/Balls combo in to run their economy – I am sure there would be no money for weapons(or much else) in about three weeks.

    Cleggy could peddle the gay marriage idea. I am sure it would be well received by the locals. a risk worth taking I think.

    Red Len should go too – union membership is quite low – he should be able to help ruin productivity and prevent any hope of war.

    So Dave gets a win /win – Overseas Aid, Green Technology, Peace. Nobel Prize worthy stuff.

    The two Ed’s get to play out their economic fantasy without the need for tiresome elections. One postal vote each will suffice. Always the IMF to bankroll them.

    Cleggy gets to be in two coalitions, with no power or influence. And he will be a long way from Sheffield. Just what he needs.

    Red Len gets to implement his socialist Utopia – the HS2 project(see para 1) will provide a fertile recruiting ground and a money pit for the two Ed’s economic fantasies.

    if this does not work, we still have the airstrike option.

    Ticks all the boxes for me.

  91. 91
    the Black Death says:

    Have we actually got a missile defence system or are we hoping nobody will shoot at us ?

  92. 92
    Fat Pat says:

    It’s “is shit” you morons. The beeb is a corporation (singular)

  93. 93
    C.O.Jones says:

    Yes we have actually, our boats are behind the American boats.

  94. 94
    Mike Oxenfire says:

    Or should that be “the BBC, arse hit” ?

  95. 95
    Gordon Brown says:

    Nurse, why do all these flies buzz round me when I play at smearing?

  96. 96
    the Black Death says:

    the country used to be littered with TB hospitals, there’s one on the isle of wight. I don’t know if you can still access it but underneath there is a tunnel with a rails where they used to tip all the bibs and bobs into the sea.

  97. 97
    the Black Death says:

    I meant here

  98. 98
    C.O.Jones says:

    Are you talking about our Human Shield?

  99. 99
    Julia Gillard says:

    Natch, what do you think state media exist for?

  100. 100
    Anonymous says:

  101. 101
    JH3942859230923-4 says:

    A four point poll lead at this stage ain’t good for the lefties.

    Ludicrous boundary advantage or not, it’s not going to be the cakewalk they expected.

  102. 102
    The anti-Ruprecht says:

    Australia has the most controlled media outside of Nth Korea, there’s not much point complaining about state or (same thing) Murdoch media, that’s all there is here.

  103. 103
    Rupe says:

    The fix is in, no point in running dog lackeys trying to push the bolshevik cause.

  104. 104
    BBC executive says:

    There’s nothing we like more than a group of
    lefties,funded by the licence payer, sitting round
    agreeing with each other.

  105. 105
    helpful suggestion says:

    Twatson’s vast enough to be a Human Shield.

  106. 106
    Bob Katter says:

    Son, you clearly don’t read the Longreach Leader. Hard-hitting, fearless journalism, solid support for the local MP’s (or there’d be a spot of reader feedback out the back of the Stockman’s) – and the latest fat-stock prices.

    Who is this Watson bastard anyway?

  107. 107
    I d on't n eed no d octor says:

    Tom Watson is disgustingly fat.

  108. 108
    Cornish Pilchard says:

    Why don’t we just send Watson to Assad’s Syria. Two or three Watson lunches and we can starve the regime into submission – a weapon of mass consumption

  109. 109
    AuntieEm, Auntie says:

    Hmm, is that cream on your face? Oooh and refreshing cream too? How scrummy!

  110. 110
    The Mandelsonian Way says:

    I suggest we deploy robots (Abbots) too…

  111. 111
    The Philosophy Dept of the University of Woolamaloo says:

    Rule 1 : “No pooftas obese lefty poms”

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