July 7th, 2013

Read Guido’s Column in The Sun Today

A Unitemare for Miliband, Watson and McCluskey in the Sun today. In Guido’s column find out:

  • The full story behind Watson’s WAGs
  • Sally speaks: what she says on rumours about her and John
  • To what did Boris treat his wife on their 20th wedding anniversary?
  • Handbags at dawn between Tory wives
  • Dave’s photo op own goal
  • Chuka’s off-camera cock-up
  • Coalition tensions in the DWP
  • IPSA hit MPs where it hurts
  • Watson’s voices in his head

Politics for the many, not the few. Just 60p, get involved!


  1. 1
    Living in 97.2% white Merseyside says:

    Up our way I reckon more people read The Observer than the Current Bun!

    We’re not as unintelligent as you Londonistaners think.

    • 3
      Hillsborough Truth says:

      You lot still campaining for compensation after those Scouse drunks without tickets forced their way into Hillsborough.

      • 7
        Expat Geordie says:

        They’ll be coming after you for that. Didn’t you know that you are not allowed to mention the real truth about what happened there? It even has it in the Bible – “Thou shalt not offend Scousers”.

        • 31
          Innocent my backside says:

          I always recall seeing the footage of Scousers climbing into Wembley for the subsequent cup final, being hauled up and in by other fans for free…..overcrowding?…sure what harm could that do?

      • 85
        Anonymous says:

        Kelvin McKenzie was wrong – accept it. Hillsborough report is about the truth- not compensation

        • 106
          Every Scouser says:

          What a cock! The whole Hillsborough campain is only about compo – “for the grief I suffered after my 3rd cousins mate said he knew someone who was going to go to the match.”

          Now, where’s me sick bennies – I haven’t been able to do a days work since then for thinking about those poor people.

          • Anonymous says:

            Having been pelted with sharpened 2p coins by scousers at a PL game I am hardly a fan of theirs – but they make you look like a genius. Typical pillock; fan of the law when it agrees with you, and when it doesn’t its corrupt, stupid…..you name it. Go crawl back under your bigot blanket.

        • 326
          CYNICAL OLD MAN says:

          The Hillsborough report is about as truthful as the result of the Taylor Enquiry. Taylor refused to accept any evidence of drunkenness & the lack of tickets of the scouse fans. Many pubs around Hillsborough were drunk dry by the scousers and locals gave statements about filthy scousers pissing in their front gardens. Many of the locals were also threatened with violence when they remonstrated with them about their disgusting behaviour. One thing neither enquiries asked is why did so many scousers turn up at the ground late when all the Notts Forest fans were in the ground well before kick-off? I can remember seeing a CCTV recording of scouse fans pouring into the Leppings Lane stand and beating back their own fans trying to escape the crush. THAT CCTV evidence was shown at the Inquest.

          The results of both enquiries were pre-determined because of the political pressure from the bereaved families and their left-wing, agenda driven allies eager to put the blame on “Fatcher”.

          • Scotch Corner passport control says:

            No point in making a Sr Murray. He’ll only have to hand it back next year when he becomes a common foreigner.

          • Time to pension the NHS off says:
          • Why are radio5 presenters so fucking cheerful says:

            Christ on a fucking bike who designed that shit ?

            let me explain. In order for something to work successfully, visually, there has to be tension.This means that there has to be things of a different size. there are 5 ( well 6 ) things and they are all the same fucking size. Redo it and come see me in my office.

          • The truth the whole truth and Labours version of it says:

            Will that be sent to Stafford

          • Benefit free zone says:

            At Heysel, they(scousrs) called the pissed up late arrival fighting sport that they really went for by the name of…… steaming. Since forgotten. Nothing changed at Sheffield. Louts all, now compy/ benebene pros. Coachloads of cheats looking for a crash on the M62 last year anyone?

      • 151
        Why are radio5 presenters so fucking cheerful says:

        I wasn’t there but I did see on the TV people who were trying to get away from the crush by climbing over the fence onto the field being pushed off the fence back into the crush by police.

        • 164
          Anonymous says:

          Good question – but not one the Sun-lovers want mentioned.

        • 177
          Justice for the Heysel 39 says:

          The simple fact is that if the Liverpool supporters hadn’t acted like bloodthirsty savages years earlier in Belgium, they wouldn’t have been treated as pitch invaders on the day in Hillsborough and been shoved back by the coppers.

          Something the Liverpool fans don’t want mentioned.

    • 5
      Expat Geordie says:

      It’s your loss then. I remember when The Observer used to be a decent newspaper. And as a former paperboy it used to be bloody heavy to deliver.

      • 12
        Nostalgic says:

        I haven’t read it since the 1980s.

        • 14
          Expat Geordie says:

          I haven’t delivered it since the 80′s.

        • 19
          Nostalgic says:

          I hope that wasn’t because I stopped ordering it.

          • paper waste says:

            who has enough time, concentration and memory that goes into reading the Observer(Guardian on Sunday) and its sister daily?

            Lets give these heroic readers a quickie test. If they fail it perhaps they shouldn’t be reading it.

          • Expat Geordie says:

            Oh, so you were the one.

            I gave up delivering newspapers in 1987 as a 17 year old. I started in 1979 as a 9 year old (hard for kids to believe now, and only borderline legal then)and did it virtually every day for eight years. I also had a summer job on a building site when I was 16, and worked behind the counter in the newsagents at weekends from 14 to 17. Had to pack it all in when we moved house in 87, but then got a job at Morrisons whilst I was at sixth form.

            Who said that there were no jobs in the north-east in the 80′s?

          • Fog on the Tyne says:

            There’s always been plenty of jobs in the North East, even now. It’s just that for the benefit parasites it’s easier to be bankrolled by the state. You just have to look at the crowds of working age men waiting for the bars around the Grainger Market to open at 9 am ( yes, 9 in the morning).

          • Anonymous says:

            Tell me Expat Geordie; did you also author the Monty Python Yorkshiremen sketch?

          • Nostalgic says:

            That is how things used to be. Apart from the odd evening babysitting, my first job was for 30p an hour working in a timber yard during the school holidays in the summer of 1976. I turned 14 during that summer. Me and the other lads got a massive payrise to 40p an hour when we were joined by the son of one of the managers.

            Other jobs when still at school included selling petrol (solely in charge of a petrol station), cleaning shit out of calf pens on a farm, driving tractors (with trailers) during the harvest, (at age 15), building a grandstand and bagging up hundred-weights of coal in a coal yard.

          • CYNICAL OLD MAN says:

            For the benefit of Anonymong, the Yorkshiremen sketch was written by Tim Brook-Taylor for the old ITV comedy series ” At Last The 1948 Show”. The Python team did use it on one of their American Tours but NEVER in the BBC TV series.

    • 59

      I used to buy my copy from Binns in Fawcett St.

      • 89
        Mackem Eat Cake says:

        I collected old newspapers and took them to the local chippie and exchanged them for a packet of chips.

      • 330
        Living in 97.2% white Merseyside says:

        Pity you’ve no food banks. I’m sure you could pick up a copy for free there.

    • 143
      Owen's mum says:

      We’re the mugs for still reading this blog when Gheedough saves all his stories for Massa Murdoch.

      I only come here to find out what my naughty little boy is up to.

      • 174
        Chinki Davey says:

        Guido gets told what to put in his Sun page, then he rather embarrassingly tries to tease us here on Sunday, like any fuck tard reading this is gonna suddenly go out and buy the fucking NOTW (thats what it is, just without the dead kids answerphone messages). Then the fat, camp paddy puts all the stories up here on a Monday after that mong kid has done another really, really bad cartoon.

        • 234
          Anonymous says:

          How dare you! Greedo may be fat and camp but he is no paddy. Born in London and known at school in Harrow as ‘Under’, for both humerous and literal reasons.

        • 251

          Do you really think they would bother paying us so much if they already knew what they wanted to put in the paper? Do you really think through the nonsense you write, it doesn’t even make sense.

        • 302
          Maqboul says:

          They are all Useful Idiots but some idiots are more idiotic than others.

          • Ghost of Marx (Groucho) says:

            Don’t rise to the bait – they get a stiffy if you reply to their silly rantings.

    • 169
      Dave should resign now says:

      You chaps up in Liverpool are no less smart than the chaps down in London.

      London guys – with increased pollution in that city, are likely a little lower IQ if anything.

      It only takes slightly more nowse than that gifted to the average union leader to realize that Ed M is in very deep shit now, and it will only get better.

      Especially if Chilcot is published within the next 9 months :-)

      Scouse position on Sun still totally understandable. The Hillsborough fiasco has still not been properly dealt with, despite the admission of police error and propagandized lies.

      • 176
        Ziggy Startup says:

        Nowse? A fucking bullet for you come the time, you and any immediate relatives, time to clean the gene pool.

        • 229
          Anonymous says:

          Oh hell; Parker Farage has another of his councillors to deal with….

  2. 2
    Hillsborough Truth says:

    You lot still campaining for compensation after those Scouse drunks without tickets forced their way into Hillsborough.

    • 6
      Dick the Prick says:

      Thanks for that, err…nurse, nurse, he’s woken up again!

      • 61
        Subhead says:

        Watson has a girlfriend?

        • 202
          The working class can kiss my ass I'm a union Lord at last. says:

          Wonder what attracted her?
          His good looks and impressive physique?
          Or that he could swing her selection in a safe Labour seat?

  3. 4
    Dick the Prick says:

    TBF to the young girl who was Twatson’s girlfriend – she’s kind of earned her safe seat for services rendered…bbbrrr….ooh, it’s cold all off a sudden.

    • 10
      Ban Political Parties says:

      She is a sly chancer who is of no use to man or beast and certainly not qualified to sit in Parliament. She should get a proper job.

      • 230
        Anonymous says:

        I was under the impression that your first sentence summarised the general qualifications of most MPs.

  4. 8
    The Court of Public Opinion says:

    Mr Squeaker should offer Nigella a shoulder to cry on. Then he can put his head between them and go flubble, flubble, flubble.

    • 20
      Celebrity Wife Swap says:

      Sally Bercow and Charles Saatchi would make such a lovely couple

    • 181
      Alaan Sugar Sugar says:

      What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing you have told her twice already. Fuck them, that’s how the J E W S are, vile, sneaky and violent.

  5. 9
    Abu Qatada's arrival says:

    Where am I being?

    Hi Abu. You’re in an interrogation room at a CIA compound in the US.

    No! I have to be in Jordan! They promise! They sign treats! They sign treats! I have go Jordan!

    Yes, they did promise to send you to Jordan. They didn’t say which Jordan. This compound is in Jordan, North Carolina. Now sit still while my colleague here attaches some wires to your anus.

  6. 11
    Why are radio5 presenters so fucking cheerful says:

    never mind Parky, could have been worse, eh ?

    • 24
      Matilda says:

      Did you send him his leaky pen?

      • 28
        Why are radio5 presenters so fucking cheerful says:

        talking of pens, as opposed to the normal chatter of penis, do you remember Gorbachev used to go to those agreement signing sessions with a cheap USSR pen and pocket the expensive pen the other guy was using ?

        • 38
          Gordon says:

          So what? I do that at Argos and the bookies.

        • 246
          Curly says:

          Odd you should mention that. In the 1960s I spent a few months working in Moscow and every Muscovite I bumped into asked me if I had a spare biro they could have (at least the sober ones who were not chasing pigeons round and round trees in Gorky Park).

      • 32
        Cecil Parkinson says:

        I’ve shagged lots of interesting women.

    • 36
      when's the barbecue says:

      For many a free pen.
      For others a free pine box.

      • 98
        Why are radio5 presenters so fucking cheerful says:

        maybe when Parky pops his clogs he could be recycled as a remote control ?

  7. 13
    A Reader says:

    I have no interest in spending 60p on the Sun.

  8. 15
    Steve says:

    Another soldier attacked in Barnsley, but no mention of it on the MSM, i wonder why. http://tinyurl.com/pl8c2wc

    • 21
      Why are radio5 presenters so fucking cheerful says:

      Problem is these sort of things are going to happen more frequently unless something is done to sort it out. It’s clear a “please don’t do that” approach will fail and so the only sensible solution is to establish a more authoritarian state with the abolition of religious meetings and the introduction of identity cards etc.

      • 34
        rick says:

        I disagree completely. Any tightening of the law will be used against the indigenous population by the police and lefty politicians. The obvious answer is MASS deportation……. back to a country were they will feel more at home.

        • 43
          Habrouring is Already a Crime Mr May says:

          Simply go round all the sheds, lofts, dodgy extensions and back rooms of all the shops, remove the illegals and imprison (not fine) those who have harboured them – if they are not British Citizens, deport them too.

          • Expat Geordie says:

            and another +1.

          • Old Blind Pugh says:

            “the introduction of identity cards ” and Geedo the Elder campaigned so long against them

          • Immigration 101 says:

            ID cards are not necessary. It is not hard to identify an illegal immigrant. They are the ones without valid national passports with visas in and permission to remain the UK.

        • 46
          Expat Geordie says:


        • 60
          get 'em out by Friday says:

          Yes the country needs a massive clear out, and it will be good for the housing situation too.

          • And Then They Came For Me says:

            Totally agree. Let’s get rid of all the Nazi scum?

          • Unite Against Freedom says:

            Yep, they can start with lefty shirt-lifting Stalinists like you

          • You Know It Makes Sense says:

            Face it, by every measure they would be far happier in some IsI@mic dungheap, lopping each others heads and hands off, than here.

            As a good christian, I feel we should not force them to live a miserable life here among people they clearly despise.

            Far better that we open the door and send them to a happier place and life of contentment elsewhere.

        • 399
          Magaluf Engerlander says:

          Now THAT is a damned good idea. Don’t like the liberal UK? Feck off to Saudi, Syria etc… Where they think Sharia is the best thing since sliced infidels.

    • 23
      Religion Of Peace says:

      Bansley is a Muslin town – he should not have been there.

      • 25
        Matilda says:

        So now we have no-go areas in northern England too?

        • 45
          The British Public says:

          No we don’t.

        • 55
          Expat Geordie says:

          Didn’t Jack Straw get shouted down in Derby whilst he was Home Secretary for coming into “a muslim area”?

          • Also Unimpressed says:

            Jack Straw deserves shouting at and it doesn’t really matter what people shout. The man’s life and career exemplify all that is rotten and lousy about the Labour Party and its shitty governance of our country.

          • As shit as the Bradford bigots says:

            Of course, next week, we’ll have British citizens attacked and abused for walking down main roads which Irish Nationalists claim as ‘their’ areas too.

          • Hacked Off says:

            Send all those Geordies home,coming down here and stealing all our jobs.Though I have to admit they keep those public lavatories and streets clean,so not all bad.

          • Maqboul says:

            Obviously too dumb to understand what “expat” means.

      • 364
        CYNICAL OLD MAN says:

        I’m surprised there’s a Muzzie population in Barnsley. The mining community that was were the most racist of people I’ve ever encountered. Labour voters all. Up until about seven years ago most P*k*s*anis were hassled out of the town. Places like Grimesthorpe, Hoyland and Lundwood were “hideously white” as Greg Dyke was wont to say.

        Can’t believe it’s been turned into a mini Bradford in that short time.

    • 29
      albacore says:

      Erm, perchance they don’t want to stir up racial tensions
      And that’s why inconvenient stuff gets no mentions
      Mind you, from the comments that were posted thereafter
      Such omissions don’t arf generate knowing laughter

    • 47
      Mornington Crescent says:

      The Beeboids tried to smear poor old whitey the other evening on R4, proclaiming how “diverse” Woolwich was stopping people coming in to stir up trouble *after* R1gby’s murd3r.

      Naturally, there was almost no mention of how zero effort was made to stop Muzz3es preaching hate and stocking up on meat cleavers in the first place. Pure Orwellian stuff.


      • 58
        Steve says:

        And zero mention of the antics of the thuggish UAF.

        From todays Sun, yes i bought it.

        The day can’t be far off when people fleeing from persecution, racial and religious intolerance in search of a better life for their children, will be those leaving Britain.

        • 63
          innit tho says:


          • How disgusting says:

            That despicable girl climbing over the poppy wreaths ought to be arrested. Appalling disrespect.

        • 100
          Mornington Crescent says:

          Typical comment on the Beeboids’ rolling coverage of AQ’s deportation:

          “Name withheld, West Midlands emails: (in response to Sylvia Tetteh, 1013) I admire Sylvia Tetteh’s comment and admire her for posting it. I am white British-born and Sylvia’s comment shows we can all live in harmony regardless of colour, race or creed. The UK is a multi-racial society and I feel that enriches us all.”

    • 192
      Susan Bleakly says:

      Because no one gives a flying monkey fuck, so what a soldier gets done over by a load of dharbs, not like it is anyone of any real use to the country. Dumb, working class chavs in doc martins, chiv the steroided wankers up I say, help for heroes? Bollox you violent chav scum.

  9. 16
    Anonymous says:

    Is there any truth in the rumour that the McCanns have parted company?

    • 48
      An inconvenient truth says:

      Yes, they parted company with their daughter Madeline 6 years ago to go out for dinner with their friends whilst on holiday.

      • 178
        Class Interests says:

        You are not allowed to say that about the nice, middle-class, media-friendly, McCanns.

    • 99
      The Tapas Nine says:

      We haven’t heard or seen anything. Again.

    • 103
      The McC@nn's ex-BBC PR wallah who they called before the police says:

      Absolutely not. And that is the truth – obviously.

  10. 22
    Mornington Crescent says:

    So the Beeboids mock Bartoli’s looks – presumably because she’s female and over 18.

    What do people expect from a sordid vipers’ nest of ped3rasts and gayers?

    • 26
      Matilda says:

      She should have bashed that reporter round the head with her racquet. Cheeky sod.

      • 39
        The BBC ethnically cleansing Britain says:

        It was probably because Bartoli is white European. You could bet Inverdale’s bollocks he would not have said that about Serena Williams.

        • 49
          Who is Inverdumb Anyway? says:

          Why did the BBC employ him in the first place? Anyone know?


            God knows because he is a Grade one arsehole.He is big buddies with Clare Balding who made those horrendous remarks about a jockeys teeth and then moaned when Adrian Gill referred to her as a dyke on a bike,as another thread says he wouldnt have dare commented on the Williams sisters,typical BBC !

          • One Term Dave says:

            He typifies the excellence of the BBC,which I am determined to preserve at all costs.

          • Alan Partridge says:

            A-ha! A man after my own heart.

    • 71
      Dweeb says:

      No. Because she’s an ugly cow with bags under the eyes, warts and crooked teeth.

    • 77
      How disgusting says:

      Inverdale really is a grade A arsehole. Time the BBC replaced him and those other boring old farts on the Match of the Day team.
      Bartholi’s a lovely girl

    • 83
      Screeching Banshee says:

      She had the most ugly strokes and grips I’ve ever seen on a Wimbledon court. Albeit ideal for a Clay court.The natural serve and volley grass player, with beautiful strokes just went into meltdown. Must have been that unusual thing in the sky. Still they both got equal pay for equal work as the men. 2 sets. 16 games and all over in one hour. The women segregate themselves for most of the year. Their own tournaments, sponsors, prize money. The screeching starts at the grand slams. Suddenly its all about equality. Sharapova v Azarenka is number one in my Room 101. Ugly torture.

  11. 27
    Not Dan Hodges says:

    Owen Jones walks into a bar, and find it staffed by a dinosaur. “Bloody hell, shouldn’t you be extinct!?” says the dinosaur.

  12. 35
    Atheist says:

    If you burn a koran, a muslim will burn down your house.

    The joke’s on him. My house is full of korans.

  13. 37
    Really!! says:

    So last week Ed Balls accused the Conservatives of being Jeffrey and Bungle and this week it turns out that Milliband is a Puppet too!!

    • 52
      Len McSuckyfucky says:

      He’s no puppet. He’s my bitch.

      Hey! Ed! Hey! Where’s my teaboy?!

      I’m here, sir.

      Where’s my tea, boy?

    • 53
      An inconvenient truth says:

      The words muppets and puppets are too kind to describe these liblabcon vipers and quislings.

  14. 50
    mode says:

    Andrew Neil looking very smart on Sunday Politics. Dark hair day with dark suit / blazer today.
    H@rry, with his natural locks must be disappointed he cannot follow Afneils choice of different hair colours to match his clothing for the day.

    • 118
      Old Blind Pugh says:

      How do you know H.C.’s is not just a cheap rug

      • 208
        Tay King-dePisse says:

        Who’d buy a syrup that looks like THAT bird’s nest, unless he was a clown, or that idiot from Goodfellas that gets an ice pick to his cerebellum?
        Are you saying Neo’s a clown?
        He amuses you?
        What are you saying here?

        (And how the hell would an old blind man know what Hairy’s hair looks like, anyway, come to that?)

  15. 57
    Fabians are evil says:

    Ed deserves everything he gets – Reap what you sow you marxist bastards

    • 125
      Old Blind Pugh says:

      Unlike Dave he has to become decisive and say who’s the leader other wise he might as well just pack it in. http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2013/jul/07/unite-crisis-miliband-opportunity-rawnsley.
      Dave Boy has also got to be more decisive and stick to policies he and his advisers have worked out, like young Teddy he has some wannabe challengers for the leadership, but apart from their own supporters, would they carry the day with the electors, the ones who finally decide, they all have baggage, so his position is not as desperate as young Teddy’s

  16. 67
    Tom Fatson says:
    • 73
      Anonymous says:

      It’s only a distant relationship. They can’t get any closer because of the size of his belly.

    • 74
      Dweeb says:

      Perhaps he lives with the girlfriend in his mum’s basement. Perhaps she’s actually the coalman.

    • 75
      Tom Thump says:

      He is like the bloke on the BT Hub ad.
      Not the gay looking, andy Burnham, mascara boy. The other,ugly one.

      The woman has certainly climbed a very greasy pole indeed to get a safe seat selection.

    • 90
      The Former Mrs Tom Watson says:

      Sadly for me and our children, that wasn’t the case.

      • 264
        The working class can kiss my ass I'm a union Lord at last. says:

        So was he shagging the young wannabe while still pretending to be a happily married man with kids?

        • 382
          M102 says:

          ….and saying how the Murdoch/hacking business had destroyed his marriage.

          • The proof is in a shed load of puddings says:

            So TWatson proves the claim that only those with something to hide want to censor the press.

  17. 68
    Owen Jones says:

    I am the people’s poet.

    • 129
      Old Blind Pugh says:

      Shouldn’t that be popsie

    • 145
      Owen McCluskeggal says:

      Beautiful Assembly of the People Unite!
      Alas! I am very sorry to say
      That a hundred fake votes have been taken away
      On a summer’s day of 2013,
      Which will be remember’d for its political scene.

      ’Twas about seven o’clock at night,
      And the press complained with all its might,
      And the rain came pouring down,
      And the dark clouds reminded everyone of Gordon Brown,
      And Ed the Red seem’d to say-
      “I’ll stop the Falkirk comrades’ who didn’t their own memberships pay.”

      When the all-expenses gravy train left Theobald’s Road
      The comrades’ hearts were light and felt very bold,
      But Boreas blew a terrific gale,
      Which made their hearts for to quail,
      And many of the passengers with fear did say-
      “I fear Unite will not win us a safe seat today.”

      And when the train came near to Lenzie way,
      Miliband did loud and angry bray,
      And complained about which ones of us had actually bothered to pay

      In the summer’s day of 2013,
      Which will be remember’d for its political scene.
      So the gravy train sped on with all its might,
      And Len McCluskey’s cheque book soon hove in sight,
      And the passengers’ drank a bevvy or two,
      Thinking they would enjoy themselves on expenses too,
      With their friends at home they lov’d most dear,
      And raise a hearty fixed election cheer.

      So the gravy train mov’d slowly towards selection day,
      Until it was nearly pay day,
      Then fatty Watson with a crash gave way,
      And down went the gravy train and passengers all happy and gay!
      The Miliband did loudly bray,
      Because a hundred fake votes had been taken away,

      On a summer’s day of 2013,
      Which will be remember’d for its political scene.
      As soon as the catastrophe came to be known
      The alarm from mouth to mouth was blown,
      And the cry rang out all o’er the town,
      Good Heavens! the Labour Party’s edifice is blown down,
      And a gravy train from London Town,
      Which made all the comrades’s smiles turn down,
      And made them for to turn pale,
      Because none of the passengers were sav’d to tell the tale
      How the disaster happen’d in the summer of 2013,
      Which will be remember’d by the politically keen.
      It must have been an awful sight,
      To witness in the dusky moonlight,
      While the Tories did laugh,
      and Miliband did bray,
      About the selection fiasco down Falkirk way,
      Oh! ill-fated selection corruption down Falkirk way,
      I must now conclude my lay
      By telling the world fearlessly without the least dismay,
      That the Tory press would not have had a field day,
      At least many sensible men do say,
      Had the Party been supported by honest buttresses,
      At least many sensible men confesses,
      For the more honestly we our politics do build,
      The less chance we have of being electorally killed.

      Apologies to: http://www.mcgonagall-online.org.uk/gems/the-tay-bridge-disaster#sthash.bGhrOFU8.dpuf

  18. 70
    Ladyboy Cooper says:

    Now that Qatada’s gone I need some other reason to get my bellyaching face on the telly.

    • 79
      Bill Quango MP says:

      She reminds me of Tinkerbell.
      Denis McShame is Jiminy Crickett

      And Pinochio , the onworldly, wooden, lying puppet boy?
      A role little Ed is born for.

      In the end they are all consumed by the whalesized debts they create

    • 80
      Goggle Box says:

      If you quit politics for good, I can promise it will get at least 30 seconds on the evening news. Well, maybe not on the BBC.

    • 81
      Credit theif says:

      Don’t worry, we’ll wheel out any Labour politican who wants in in the story, just to pretend Labour arranged the extradition

    • 93
      Lost in Clacton says:

      I used to think Rolf Harris was innocent.

      Now I am not too sure.

      Can you please do something to help.

      He is over 80 now and could die before there is any trial.

  19. 82
    CIA field agent in Jordan says:

    Hello Abu. Meet your cellmate, Bubba. He has a thing for bearded arabs. I hope you brought some lube with you.

    • 121
      Harrovian says:

      Shame his feckless family didn’t go with him. Their neighbours in Harrow are organising a council tax boycott in protest because those spongers live entirely on benefits – not one of them works. Good luck with the boycott

      • 390
        Don't waste my taxes says:

        Only those who are born into this country or have paid into the system should be entitled to benefits.

  20. 88
    BBC red bottom says:

    Andy Murray!
    We have collectively wet ourselves with anticipation!

    • 94
      Lost in Clacton says:

      Who is Andy Murray?

      • 107
        Why are radio5 presenters so fucking cheerful says:

        who, pray tell, has eaten all the fucking strawberries ?

        • 109
          Why are radio5 presenters so fucking cheerful says:

          alternate question:
          “Which fat fuck has eaten all the strawberries ?”
          ” not me”
          ” not me”
          “me neither”
          “wasn’t me”
          ” nope”
          “I dunno”

    • 101
      DDB says:

      The only thing worse than Andy losing is if Andy wins. Either way I will be turning the television and radio OFF until the Ashes start. Luckily I no longer buy a newspaper – not even The Sun.

      • 159
        UKIP or bust says:

        you’ll have to avoid all media for a very long time if the miserable jock wins as he’s up there with, o’bamama, mandala and law rance, in importance as far as the Bbbc is concerned,

  21. 111
    julesbb says:

    Ed is good. Straighter and braver than most on the front benches of both parties. Just hope it doesn’t prove to be a mirage. I might even be persuaded to vote labour. That’s a first!!!

    • 114
      C.O.Jones says:


    • 115
      Pundit says:

      Make sure you contact your GP first thing tomorrow morning. The side-effects of your medication are becoming dangerous.

      • 119
        A & E Every Time says:

        This is exactly what I was talking about – people can’t get in to see their GPs any more and are wandering around without medication.

    • 216
      Lab HQ Falkirk says:

      Well said jules (your cheque is in the post}

  22. 112
    Alex Salmond, formerly the cleverest man in politics says:

    Come on, Nationalists and Andy!

    • 267
      Balls says:

      Murray loves Scotland so much he lives in one of the poshest parts of Surrey

      • 311
        Anonymous says:

        Well it would be so sensible to add several hours to your day, travelling from Dunblane to train wouldnt it ? no wonder you will never be PM Ed, your are really thick !

  23. 113
    Why are radio5 presenters so fucking cheerful says:

    Is that the game where they try to kick an Englishman’s head between 2 posts ?

    • 299
      Universal Hiss says:

      I think that is the Scottish vote for independence or not.

      Or it could be a friendly between Bradford & Leeds.

      • 300
        Universal Hiss says:

        This reply is to a post made by someone in 1918.

        Dear me Guido. Sort it out.

        • 379
          Fabians are evil says:

          Surely now is the time to investigate the massive POSTAL VOTE. = labour’s biggest scam?

          • Sit Petra says:

            Postman Pat. Postman Pat.
            Postman Pat and his black and white cat.
            All the birds are singing,
            and the day is just beginning.
            Pat feels he’s a really happy man.

            Everybody knows his bright RED van,
            all his friends will smile as he waves to greet them,
            Maybe, you can never be sure,
            there’ll be knock (knock knock)
            Ring (ring ring).
            Letters through your door.
            (Hee Hee).

            Postman Pat. Postman Pat.
            Postman Pat and his black and white cat.
            Early in the morning, just as day is dawning,
            he picks up all the post bags in his van.

  24. 117
    P l e b says:

    Were our human rights temporarily suspended overnight?

  25. 120
    Anonymous says:

    I think many people in England, most in Wales, and nearly everyone in Scotland would be ‘absolutely delighted’ at David Cameron’s departure.

    • 133
      Old Blind Pugh says:

      It would not help Libore it would just open the door for the UKIparty as Tories would vote in a no hoper

    • 157
      That's hilarious says:

      Dream on……Cameron will still be PM in May 2015 whereas Ed Miliband will be a guest on various BBC Quiz Shows

    • 315
      Anonymous says:

      Sorry but David Cameron wont be “departing” but im “absolutely delighted ” to tell you that Milliband will be !

  26. 122
    Owen Jones says:

    Bought Pimms, forgot lemonade. I AM SO COOL.

  27. 123
    Rt. Hon Butch Cameron MP says:

    Len McCluskey

  28. 124
    Crowshaw J says:

    Does Dave’s blood also boil when he hears of the corruption and lobbying of News International, when he hears of the tax evasion and tax avoidance schemes of the very wealthy, when he hears of young people unable to afford education, unable to rent even decrepit studio flats, or when he hears of the enormously widening gap between rich and poor?

    • 131
      Maude Francis (age 83) says:

      “Speaking on Abu Qatada’s departure, Cameron said: “….this man who has no right to be in our country, who is a threat to our country and that it took so long and was so difficult to deport him…”

      The Conservative government in 1994 should never have given him asylum then, eh Dave?

      • 139
        Tachybaptus says:

        Living in the Ruislip area and the bloomin’ noisy helicopter at 2.30am bringing him to Northolt and that fookin’ jet taking off at 2.45am woke me up.

        Couldn’t they have extradited him in the winter when my windows are closed ?

        • 221
          Blacksmith says:

          Yes, I also wondered about the absolute necessity of all those bloody macho-look-at-me-I-have-a-noisy-siren cvnts driving along completely empty roads at 2 in the morning. Some people really do think they are SO frightfully important, don’t they?

    • 132
      The Labour Party says:

      We let NI get away with it when we were in government and really let it get out of hand – it was in our interest, after all. Of course our attitude changed when they stopping backing Labour.

      We made it easier than ever before for the rich to avoid tax by adding more and more layers of complexity to the tax system, and keeping top tax rates low.

      We introduced tuition fees for higher education, making it harder for the young to continue in education.

      We held back home building and increased housing demand massively with uncontrolled immigration, driving up rents and house prices beyond the reach of poorer people.

      We did more to increase the gap between rich and poor than anybody!

      • 225
        Blacksmith says:

        You also abolished the treason laws – something Dave needs to re-introduce with retrospective applicability before the month is out.

  29. 127
    Dick Lionheart says:

    A Barnsley soldier was attacked in the street, knocked unconscious and then repeatedly stamped and kicked in the face and head – just hours after getting home.

    Is this the muzzies at it again ???

  30. 128
    Anonymous says:

    with murray mint playing – they are.

  31. 130
    P l e b says:

    Be funny if the Jordanians give him a ‘Megrahi welcome’

    • 155
      Cheerio enjoy the experience says:

      He’s been charged with Acts of Terrorism against the State of Jordan….no legal aid or benefits though for him

  32. 134
    Maude Francis (age 83) says:

    How are they going to sing Hakuna Matata Abu Katata now at the Lion King musical?
    Its not the same without him here.

  33. 135
    Jimmy says:

    Okay, it’s all good. Qatada’s finally gone, what a victory for Cameron. He can get back to business – doing Obama’s bidding, destroying the NHS after using it for top care for his son and because even though he used it he doesn’t really NEED it, prancing around with his supper-eating pals from Bullingdon or whatever the fuck the man does. What does he do? This has got to be his biggest success to date (other than destroying the NHS, he’s really very proud of it, as texts to his mates AC/RB will come to light and prove in the future)

    • 147
      M102 says:

      As long as you’re happy c’unty.

      • 345
        Wombat 18 says:

        Wish he’d stick to the pithy one liners. This one’s both nasty and pathetic. As if the pisshead gives a hoot about the NHS.

    • 154
      nellnewman says:

      He doesn’t need to destroy the NHS it’s rubbish anyway at least it is if you have to use it in Peterborough.

      Their care of the elderly is disgracefully bad and their paediatric service is not fit for purpose.

    • 201

      But, Jimmy!

      I thought Obama was one of yours? :-o

      • 461
        JH3284983493 says:

        No, no, no, no.

        You’ve got to remember that in Jimmyworld anything ‘nasty’ is automatically de-facto ‘right-wing’, irrespective if any aspect of the thing could be objectively described as such.

        Obama’s halo has fallen off and smashed to bits on the floor, so he has now been ‘handed’ to the right.

    • 209
      W.C. Maguire says:

      Hello broter jimmy.Glad you did’nt mention those 1200 killings in Mid Staffs.Whats your take on them bruv ?

    • 317
      Anonymous says:

      Jimmy you sound deranged in your post ! finally grasped that Ed hasnt got a fecking chance next time have we ? ha ha ha

    • 324
      Maqboul says:

      Unite ! hehe

  34. 136
    Owen Jones says:

    Owen Jones to issue t-shirts with ‘I apologise’ on the reverse. One truthful comment, this champagne quaffing “socialist”

  35. 137
    notnellnewman says:

    Ta-Ta-da, Qa-ta-da. This is Theresa May’s moment not Dave’s. Although, bandwagon jumping champion as he is, we knew he’d be right in front of a camera quick as a flash. He is a Spitting Image caricature , he really is. What a plonker.

    At least there is one Tory whose word is their bond and it most certainly ISN’T Camercon.

    Someone ought to go back over Dave’s speeches and the promises he has made and count up how many have been achieved; I would be very surprised if you could find even ONE thing he has promised that he has actually achieved.

    Dave talks the talk but it takes a WOMAN to walk the walk.

    Perhaps he should put Theresa May in charge of the economy as Osborne has failed completely to boost growth and the debt is mounting relentlessly

    • 149
      M102 says:

      At last an antidote to nell newman. I could tell that you’re not her because your space bar works :)

    • 150
      Bazinga! says:

      Osborne is a big girl.

    • 152
      nellnewman says:

      Well I’m glad you’re not me because what then would I be? But then I’m not nellnewman either really. Oh wait a moment I think I need confused.com!

      As for theresamay I think she looks like a very likely future tory leader if boris doesn’t get there first!

    • 180
      Point of Information says:

      There is still time for May to make a move on leadership.

      She is someone who Farage could deal with, and who could get the party straight again.

      Thatcher-lite is what is needed right now.

      Kudos to her for finally getting rid of Abu Q, and NOT Dave.

      • 233
        Go girl says:

        May is going in the right direction and well done to her for finally getting rid of that dangerous lunatic parasite. Now all she needs to do is get rid of the rest of his family and the get our immigration laws repatriated (or just take back) from the EU so that we can once again control our borders and kick out all the illegals and misfits who should not be in the country. That’s just for starters of course – there’s lots of other stuff needs doing urgently too.

    • 320
      Anonymous says:

      Another pratt furious that Ed has just lost the next election ! i love it !

  36. 140
    Why are radio5 presenters so fucking cheerful says:

    Why are all these unhappy muslim people here ?
    I used to think that it was television and James Bond films.
    In the sixties, when villages in Pakistan had 1 communal television the 10 year olds would be watching Roger Moore rogering some blonde and they would think everybody in the West lived that life. What a disappointment that must have been when they finally came over.

    • 346
      Alexsandr says:

      they must love wet wednesdays in Dewsbury.

      • 384
        M102 says:

        In the sixties? Roger Moore didn’t start Rogering Moore as 007 until 1973. Still good point. :)

        • 398
          Why are radio5 presenters so fucking cheerful says:

          sorry my bad. This may go some way to explain the development of silly ideas of the west by the islamics from islamabad

          Dr. No (1962-Sean Connery)
          From Russia With Love (1963-Sean Connery)
          Goldfinger (1964-Sean Connery)
          Thunderball (1965-Sean Connery)
          You Only Live Twice (1967-Sean Connery)
          On Her Majesty’s Secret Service (1969-George Lazenby)
          Diamonds Are Forever (1971-Sean Connery)
          Live and Let Die (1973-Roger Moore)
          The Man with the Golden Gun (1974-Roger Moore)
          The Spy Who Loved Me (1977-Roger Moore)
          Moonraker (1979-Roger Moore)
          For Your Eyes Only (1981-Roger Moore)
          Octopussy (1983-Roger Moore)
          A View to a Kill (1985-Roger Moore)
          The Living Daylights (1987-Timothy Dalton)
          Licence to Kill (1989-Timothy Dalton)
          GoldenEye (1995-Pierce Brosnan)
          Tomorrow Never Dies (1997-Pierce Brosnan)
          The World is Not Enough (1999-Pierce Brosnan)
          Die Another Day (2002-Pierce Brosnan)
          Casino Royale (2006-Daniel Craig)
          Quantum of Solace (2008-Daniel Craig)
          Skyfall (2012-Daniel Craig)

          • Why are radio5 presenters so fucking cheerful says:

            oh, I omitted to say they thought those films were real.
            I came back on a flight from Bangladesh and the wife of someone had never seen a toilet and proceeded to piss on the floor of the aeroplane cubicle.
            then going through customs I heard the official on the desk say
            “‘ello, and what hole have you crawled out of then ?”
            I thought ” ok, I’m home.

  37. 141
    Nick Clegg says:

    As a very liberal Liberal Democrat I oppose the British people having their say in a EU referendum forever.

    It’s the right thing to do!

    • 235
      Ann Opinion says:

      When are you going to piss off back to Rotterdam you useless waste of space? We can count you in our export figures too!

      • 440
        The Dutch Ambassador says:

        Mr Clegg will be returning to the Netherlands when we tell him to, and not before.

        That is all.

  38. 142

    The fucker has gone.

    About time.

  39. 144
    Kevin Maguire says:

    this blog has become a Murdoch puppy

    • 146
      Wendi Deng says:


    • 163
      UKIP or bust says:

      Good, that means all the knob’s who prefer their news fed to them by the Bbbc and the garudian (sic) will no longer come here with their tedious muggy comments.

  40. 148
    Len McCluskey says:

    Good luck to Andy Murray – the whole of Britain will be cheering you on, except for that bitch,Owen Jones.

  41. 156
    cheche says:

    Harman all over the tele. Why doesnt she tell us about her husbands links with UNITE

  42. 160
    Tom Smear Man Watson says:

    My favourite band is now The Hypo Crites.

  43. 162
    Dan Hodges says:

    Will someone help Abu Qatada with his volley, he’s due on center court in Jordan soon.

    • 171
      Volta and Ampere says:

      We are ready and waiting. Should be an electric performance.

      • 240
        Curly says:

        Will he also require new balls after a few games?

        • 443
          Mohammed's bacon sandwich says:

          Sexual abuse is very common in Jordanian prisons. Guards demand favours for food and hardened crims have their own brand of Islamic “brotherhood” and it almost certainly isn’t Halal.

          • Falaka and Chips says:

            You will find that is true in prisons and also police stations throughout the Middle East.

  44. 165
    Gunner "Lofty" Sugden says:

    It ain’t half hot, Mum!

    • 167
      nellnewman says:

      Funny that. The met office predicted we were going to have a long cold and wet summer.

      • 182
        A Fake Green says:

        I blame global warming/cooling.

        What we need are more taxes to stop it/start it/keep it the same.

      • 197
        The Royal Observatory says:

        Summer will be exactly as long as it always is. Autumn will follow.

        • 271
          New balls please says:

          Andrew Castle has his tongue rammed so far up Murray’s ass he can’t speak properly.

  45. 172
    Abu Qatada says:

    My bot bot hurts.

    • 195
      Nursie says:

      You’ve been a very naughty boy; I said you weren’t too big to go over my knee so Mr and Mrs Spank could visit Bottom Land!

  46. 175
    Point of Information says:

    Theresa May deserves a very large bottle of something Bubbly – and not the froth which shall be soon oozing from Qatada’s orifices.

    That, or a new pair of good shoes, or a shopping trip to Harvey Nicks.

    Good work lass !

    • 179
      Premature Decorkification says:

      One down, 2-3 million to go.

      • 189
        Point of Information says:

        I count two in less than a year including the other Abu-asshole : Hamza.

        The other 2-3 million will be harboring a certain number of equivalent assholes: This recent deportation should get the message across a bit clearer.

        Appreciation should be shown: If May gets on a roll then she can have a closet like Imelda Marcos and as a tax payer I don’t mind footing a percentage of that cost in return for this work.

    • 194
      P l e b says:

      Piss off. Quatada left voluntarily.

    • 206
      albacore says:

      The Battle of Britain was as nothing compared
      With the struggle that Tracey alone faced and dared
      Heroically to take on and overcome
      In kicking out just one very unwelcome bum

      • 210
        Point of Information says:

        Indeed: And it was mainly because of road blocks thrown up by the ECHR / ECJ and EU.

        Now, for the next trick: Article 50 / Lisbon / Referendum / Out.

        And good riddance to the EU.

        • 231
          albacore says:

          Well, I suppose that you can always hope
          (Assuming you’ve swallowed sufficient dope)
          That Tracey and the rest of Parliament
          Ever mastered what democracy meant

          • re pete says:

            Who is this Tracey to whom you keep referring?
            If it’s Kitten Heels May, you appear to be erring.
            Maybe Ullman or Emin? tho neither a political,
            [Excuse the interuption, don't mean to be critical]

          • albacore says:

            Well, pardon me, Pete, I referred to Mrs May
            (I thought Tracey was short for Theresa today)
            As pome has just shown, there is an alternative
            My, you learn so much more here, the longer you live

          • re pete says:

            Confused by the mention of ‘an unwelcome bum’,
            Because 2 Jags and Tracey would be an equivalent sum.
            Kind words from the master,[thanks] our resident Laureate
            [Will refrane now from rhyming] , no need to ingratiate
            myself with the star here,who succeeds expectations,
            But remember all parliamentary desk jobs can have other connotations.

      • 217
        pome says:

        Not sure it’s a Tracey, I thought it was a Treeza
        The latter a Lady, the other just screwed a geezer.

        • 293
          Abu Qatada's Hairy Hoover says:

          ** This is a family blog so we cannot publish what was originally written here – instead something following style shall be substituted **

          Theresa or Treeza, the un-idle maid of May,
          At home in her office, and smiling by day,
          Deals quietly with business, in the hours of dark,
          When the knives for Hamza-Qatada, for sure found their mark.

          She is nobodies geeza, nor worried by threats,
          The posters of Tooting, have been put out to let,
          As she brings forth the candle, to light you to bed,
          Beware of her chopper, which will cut off your head.

    • 224
      paddy docherty says:

      bit of lippy and a smart frock and i would give her one

    • 265
      Bazinga! says:

      Yes but the Tory mongs who turned a blind eye to the importing of hundreds of these fuckers in the 1990′s should be taken out and shot.

      You expect it of Labour not not supposed Tories.

  47. 196
    A Sportsfan says:

    C’mon Tim

    • 204
      Gordon Brown says:

      Nigel Mansell

      • 214
        John Inverdumb says:

        That Scottish guy with the funny face is not having such a great second innings. Why doesn’t he just try to catch the ball when it comes at him?

  48. 203

    The Earth used to have two moons but the small one collided with the present one which leaves it as the only moon.

    Was Ed Balls driving it by any chance?

    • 241
      Curly says:

      Nope, before Ed’s time. Word in the cosmos is that it was that “you know where to find me” woman (whose name escapes me for the moment; let me just check the safe seats lists).

  49. 211
    EU Funded Pro-EU Troll says:

    Vote UKIP

  50. 218
    Blacksmith says:

    Just as well Tiger and Veejay aren’t playing then isn’t it?

  51. 220
    False Name says:

    Enjoy how that depressing,little poof,Owen Jones reduces middlebrow, middle aged politicos to juvenile snarking, but a simple white flag would do just as well.

    Owen Jones really has lost the plot this time with his tweets

  52. 222
    The BBC ethnically cleansing white Britain says:

    The BBC just surpassed itself. Inbetween mmatches of the Wimbledon final, they managed to track down, with a long range telephoto lens on high, two Muslims walking along the Thames feeding some swans in the London sunshine. Celebrating culturally enriched Britain.

    • 232
      Fat Pang says:

      I think you will find they are on the payroll. You have no idea how many people it takes to put on a flagship sporting event like this in a politically correct manner when none of the finalists is black.

    • 243
      Curly says:

      Were they black swans?

      • 247
        Gordon Brown says:

        British swans for British ponds

      • 248
        Point of Information says:

        You’ll find them in Regents park – if the muzzies haven’t butchered them yet…

        • 253
          Fleet Street says:

          That was the Romanians. Or maybe they were Albanians.

          Anyway, years ago it used to be the Aussie backpackers. How times change….

          • Britain Today says:

            NO, it was the Poles who ate (and eat) the swans. The Albanians ate the Aussie backpackers (or sold them into sexual slavery, one or the other). The Romanians basically just nick stuff.

          • Cameron is a tit says:

            No, it was the Pol*es who ate the swans (and still do). The Albaníans ate the Aussie backpackers (or sold them into sex*ual slavery, one or the other. Probably.) The Romanians basically just nick anything that isn’t screwed down (and if it is screwed down, they unscrew it and then nick it – nice of Dave to let another 29 million of them into Britain as of Jan 1st).

  53. 228
    Dan Hodges says:

    When asked by Guido Fawkes about his plans for The Peoples Assembly,Owen Jones replied “Oh who gives a toss”

    He is need of help.

    • 282
      The BBC causes serious mental illness says:

      I think that quote should be broadcast widely.

      Owen needs a lesson in life: Abusing your audience is a hard one and a good one to learn.

      It is comments like that which almost make one feel pity for some sections of the left, note the key word ‘almost’.

      • 321
        the devil you know says:

        What I can’t understand is why the BBC seek out the opinion of someone who looks about twelve. Oh wait a minute, perhaps I can.

        • 387
          M102 says:

          Love the way Camoron is basking in the Quatada thing when it is his precious EU’s meddling that held up the extradition in the first place. Quisling c’unt.

          • just reminding you says:

            Cameron, May and the Tories deserve credit for ridding the country of that murderous bastard.
            Labour didn’t manage it in 13 years.

  54. 244
    Anonymous says:

    The Unite Union have called a strike at the J L R logistics partner that will shut down Jaguar Landrover.

    So Tata better build that factory in China pdq.

    • 400
      ex-union member says:

      Let’s hope the Unite members realise they’re being used as political pawns by MacCluskey and Unite.
      Unions don’t give a shit about their members.

      • 420
        Will Milliband condem this threat to British manufacturing industry? says:

        So what does Milliband think of this threat to British jobs caused by the union that bankrolls Labour and provides it with MP’s?

  55. 254
    Gordon Brown says:

    I am very disappointed in Tim Henman. Under the Conservatives, he isn’t even trying.

    • 269
      Gordon Brown says:

      If Tim doesn’t buck up, pretty soon it will all be over and the prize will be given to one of those American ladies. You know, the sisters.

  56. 255
    Advantage says:

    Go on, Novak! You can do it!

    I’ve got money on you!

  57. 260
    scrumpy jackson says:

    Murray Mints is running out of puff

  58. 262
    Bazinga! says:

    So the Tories are taking credit for Qatada finally going. Remind me of which bunch of mongs actually let him in in the first place?

    Yes those same Tory mongs are now many of them carry carrying members of UKIP.

    Do you really want old failed Tories running the Country?

    • 270
      Labour = Failure. says:

      Labour couldn’t get rid of him, the Tories could.

      Get over it.

      • 274
        Credit where credit's due says:

        The Tories got rid of Qatada AND hook hand Abu Hamza.
        Labour didn’t even bother to try.

        • 286
          Gizzard Puke says:

          the tories dont believe inhuman rights – they dont know what they are – the tories are utter scum – what does that say about those who support them?

          • in the red says:

            If everybody took care of their obligations to those close to them, there would be no need to impose an artificial code like ‘human rights’, from without.

          • Universal Hiss says:

            I think you are correct.However cast your eyes leftwards.That is total despair.

          • Dweeb says:

            And you don’t believe in the difference between fact and opinion.

        • 333
          In Fact says:

          Labour stooges in the judicary did their best to heep Hook in the UK.

        • 438
          An Icecream says:

          Anjem Choudary is still peddling his poison

    • 329

      Whilst you are correct in part, you miss out a vital point, presumably to make your claim appear stronger than it actually is. He made his asylum claim to the UK in 1994 on a forged UAE passport.

      The UK has traditionally sheltered people from persecution. That is right and should always continue. The Labour government and then the EU created a situation where persecution is automatically assumed to be the case until proven not. That is wrong, as is the forgery.

      From the time of the discovery of the false passport, he should have been out on his ear. By this time the Labour government was in office. It was not until 2001 that he was first detained.

      • 439
        Paradoxically says:

        You are correct, but the forged passport issue is a difficult one. Many a genuine asylum seeker has had to arrive using a false passport. How else can they get out of the country they are fleeing from? I would be suspicious of people who travel using their real identities.

        • 444

          Very easy answer. You declare that fact immediately upon arrival. That way the intend to deceive is upon the vacated country and not the safe haven.

          But then the safe haven can take this into account. Otherwise we would end up, as in this case, offering safe haven from a country which is recognised as friendly, a ludicrous situation and one which has not only cost us a lot of money but also much blood.

  59. 263
    Dan Hodges says:

    Rather a queer comment to come out with,Owen Jones !

    “Tennis would be more fun if each set was in a different fancy dress”

  60. 272
    old-balls-please says:

    Congratulations to Andy Murray, winning the modern day pitty-pat tennis from the baseline, [waiting for the others mistake], that is the game today.
    He did deserve it.
    He now enters the group of illustrious players / past champions like Rod Laver etc who could really play.

    • 289
      Arise Sir Andy ??? says:

      He received an OBE for winning gold at Olympics but as the first Brit for 77 years to win Wimbledon he should surely be in line for a higher honour(?) Sir Fred Perry being the last Brit to win title in 1936 but there is a rule that no honour can be awarded within 3 years of receiving one previously…so could have to wait a little longer until he becomes “Sir Andy” unless the politicians decide that such a move may prove popular…after all there are several precedents for such overriding of the rules

      I thought it was an amusing touch that Alec Sakmond who was sitting behind Cameron unfurled the “Saltire” unbeknownst to cameron so that Cameron’s head was silhouetted against it….did any enterprising press photographer capture the moment ??

      • 298
        old-balls-please says:

        Alec Sakmond? Typing error shirley?
        Somewhere between SAF Sir Alex F and the mouthpiece for Scotland- Alex Salmond- both unafraid to spin the BS in their own best interests.
        Must agree on the honour angle.
        When / or If Scotland departs the union perhaps Andy can obtain his higher rank a little earlier.
        Already a Barron, maybe Laird of Glasgow will suffice.

      • 363
        Fishy says:

        Though Salmond’s effort was a bit pathetic…especially after Murray had declared himself a Brit

  61. 273
    Gordon Brown says:

    There is still time for Tim to make a come-back in the fourth set.

  62. 277
    John Inverdale says:

    Congratulations. The man whose girlfriend has the best teeth won.

  63. 278
    Living in 97.2% white Merseyside says:

    Not often I swear on this blog but OH SHIT!

  64. 279
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    Well done Andy Murray.

    So much for the Curse of Cameron meme the lefty beeboid scum are trying to pedal.

    Best gold medal hall in olympics under Cameron

    First British Tour De France winner under Cameron

    Ashes victory away from home under Cameron

    Abu Quatada deported under Cameron

  65. 279
    The BBC causes serious mental illness says:

    Murray wins Wimbledon: A good win for the UK.
    Miliband loses credibility over union related vote rigging.
    UKIP wins support for common sense: A good decision for the UK.
    Dave loses credibility for claiming credit for May’s hard work.

    Swing’s and roundabouts, what surprises does the week ahead hold ?

    • 312
      Penfold says:

      And Abu Qatada has been kicked out.

      It’s a start…………

      • 446
        Surprises R Us says:

        … but on arrival at Amman was found not to have a valid passport. He will therefore be returned whence he came on the next plane…. Ho ho…

  66. 283
    Dan Hodges says:

    Alex Salmon putting the Scottish flag behind Cameron ha ha

    • 403
      Anonymous says:

      Alex Salmond actually made a fool of himself, it was Andy Murrays moment and he hi jacked it for his own ends.I think it was a cheap thing to do.

  67. 285
    Gizzard Puke says:

    this is getting more like the sun every day – shite

    • 313
      the devil you know says:

      It’s always been like The Sun you twat. Look at the archive.

  68. 287
    P l e b says:

    I suppose the Tories will take credit for Murray winning.

    • 309
      Anonymous says:

      see the twat salmon tried to get in on the event.

      • 339
        Universal Hiss says:

        Along with that twat Cameron. He does have a jock name though.

      • 343
        Universal Hiss says:

        & looking at The Mail, a Rooney person with some woman was there & Mrs.David Beckham.Also lots of people I’ve never heard of who might be Scottish,English,Albanian.

        • 437
          The Royal Box says:

          Rooney, oddly enough, was one of the few people to dress correctly and behave correctly.

  69. 288
    Owen Jones on behalf of The Peoples Assembly says:

    Awe-inspiring display of skill and determination from Andy Murray and a moment of great pride for our country.

  70. 290
    Boris's pecker says:

    So the long streak of Scottish Piss has won Wimbledon and he is kissing the ground and I have just almost thrown up 6 pints of Timothy Taylors Landlord bitter because he will be all over the BBC and the media and that short fat nasty little turdrag Salmon will be proclaiming this as another reason why his drunken tribe of mean minded ponces should leave the Union.
    I’m watching Songs of Praise, that’s how serious it is!

  71. 291
    Novak Jockovitch says:

    I’m an honorary Scotsman

  72. 292
    Fact Hunt says:

    Murray’s greatest achievement is that he managed to win it in a year that meant he wouldn’t have have to dance with one of the Williams brothers at the end of tournament ball. Well planned that man.

    • 296
      J Inverdale says:

      Bartoli isn’t much of a looker either!

      • 447
        Surprises R Us says:

        It has now been renamed after that famous old song – the Ugly Bug Ball. Someone can googlise it.

  73. 297
    Anonymous says:

    If Eric Pickles continues to bully councils to allow uncontrolled videoing then there is only one result.

    The meetings will just become rubber stamping sessions.

    Why get into any dialog, or allow representations to be made, if it will only be used as a means to intimidate local participants.

    There is already enough provision for representations to be made in writing so why bother risking discussion. All they will get is a video of a show of hands.

    Say thanks to Pickles for removing the last hope of visibility in a decision.

    He obviously hates visible democracy. Otherwise he might actually abide by the laws made by parliament in say 1960 at first wide spread availability of personal recording equipment.

    (Do note that he himself is protected from cameras as the visitors gallery in HoC does not allow cameras or mobile phones.)

    • 318
      Anonymous says:

      Also note, most meetings happen without the need for any security. The councillors have to keep the order. By law there is only one way to remove people that do not abide by the rules and that is by using the police. It has to be that way, or we will return to situations where certain individuals are just not allowed through the doors.

      That was the reason the 1960s laws were made; to give free access to all. Certain councils were using their own security to stop attendance of those that disagreed with them.

      Please give them back their freedom to run a fair and open meeting without any bullying by desperate minority activists.

      • 356
        Point of Information says:

        Just ensure there are some constables present to keep the peace.

        Works if the police aren’t too politicized.

        Minority activists should be allowed to express their opinion freely in a democratic fashion. If they breach the peace or cause a public nuisance – and the law is very clear about what qualifies (and this does not curtail democratic freedom of expression provided the law is enforced correctly).

    • 337
      Kilowheat says:

      Why do you keep going on about this non story?

      Has someone videoed councillor anonymous with his cock out at a planning hearing?
      Get over it. So What if you are videoed! Don’t say anything slanderous, libellous, untrue or fucking stoopid then.


      • 458
        Anonymous says:

        With filming the “nuisance” happens on the internet. No Police there.

    • 436
      Forest Road says:

      Council meetings, especially planning committee meetings, became rubber stamps years ago in the People’s Corrupted Republic of Waltham Forest.

  74. 310
    Penfold says:

    and this what Labour Uncut have to say about the article regarding Doug Alexander.
    So much for independence and free comment……

    “”We have withdrawn an article today relating to Unite and Mr Len McCluskey that contained allegations concerning Unite’s role in nominating Labour MPs with particular reference to Paisley. This withdrawal follows correspondence form Unite’s solicitors to the effect that information contained in the article was false. Pending further enquiries, we have withdrawn the article and request that media outlets do not report further the information contained in it.””

  75. 314
    Splendid says:

    Good on Murray. Great performance, most enjoyable.
    That wee tit Salmond really looked petty dragging out the Saltire.

    • 350
      Universal Hiss says:

      I thought it was funny. Politics at its best.

      It is all a load of shit isn’t it?

      Get your laughs while you can.

      Tennis players don’t represent their countries do they?

      • 362
        Tachybaptus says:

        Murray is a special case: he represents Britain when he wins, and Scotland when he loses.

        • 383
          DeadEd says:

          In all the tournaments he plays in it says GB after his name. In the Davis Cup he plays for Great Britain. The ATP list his nationality as GBR. I have not seen his Passport but presumably it says British Citizen after “Nationality”. I think his Place of Birth could be Melbourne Australia and his Residence, Wimbledon.

  76. 316
    Andy fae Glesga says:

    Can I be British now? Go on, let me, pleeeeese!

  77. 328
    Mad, Bad & Dangerous Gordon McRuin ( Member in absentia ) says:

    I bet Andy is delighted that I didn’t wish him well this year.

  78. 334
    Asslick Almond says:

    I came all the way down to England to score a political point.

    That makes me a great statesman, right ??

    • 371
      Barnhurst bob says:

      Fair point. Surely Scotland must host some great sporting event with world wide coverage where he could wave his tea towel.

      • 449
        Peeka Boo the Noo says:

        Don’t they have a golf course or something similar for that sort of thing?

    • 374
      DeadEd says:

      The Leader of the Conservatives and Leader of the Labour Party were there too. And all three have British Passports. If you want to know someone’s nationality look at the back of their passport. It gives Residence, Place of Birth and Nationality.
      Although on Desert Island Discs Navratalova said she has two passports, and switches between the two as a matter of convenience. Perhaps Scots will do that too in future.

      • 435
        An Anglo-Aussie-Scot says:

        Having a second passport is not always very helpful or convenient, as you find it difficult using a lot of automated airport check-in systems which do not allow and retain information about the second nationality. Nor does British Airways Executive Club scheme accommodate it.

        On the other hand, a lot of countries now charge Brits top wack for a visa, so having an alternative can save a few quid.

  79. 336
    BBC red bottom says:

    Oh my God! Oh my God ! OhmyGod! OhmyGodohmyGod! Oh! My! God!

    It’s like the Olymoics, but much better because no English are involved!

  80. 341
    Idon'tneednodoctor says:

    No tweet from Abbott about Murray’s win, mind you it involved exercise.

    • 388
      Tay King-dePisse says:

      Of course, if it had been one of the Williams sisters…then, maybe the All-England Lawn Tennis and Croquet Club and their oh-so-bourgeois Championships wouldn’t be too posh for La Abbott, with her inpeccable solidarity-with-the-workers sensibilities, to care about.

      Of course, “strawberries and cream, within strict limits (say, one berry and a single drop of cream), is a good wholesome summer snack,” you know, the usual unwelcome hectoring about what’s healthy from Ms Irony Deficiency, cannot be too far off. Expect something along these lines from her soon.

    • 391
      M102 says:

      LOL. Milic’unt didn’t look too happy either.

  81. 342
    Mfadillah says:

    I would rather to welcome of a thousand Atheist than one number of Muslim
    1. Because Atheist is more having knowledge about Human right.
    2. Their behavior are more able to adapt to the place or country in which they live.
    3, The most important thing is, they don’t have a Book !!

    And why I reject Muslim?
    1. Their are selfish, they always put their right even if it interferes to the rights of others, a small example; shouting trough Loud Speaker for Adzan (calling for pray) 5 times a day.

    2. They had legitimate orders to kill other people who are not Muslims, or until the person pays thugs money to the Muslim.
    Read the verse below:
    QS 9:29 “Fight those who believe not in Allah nor the Last Day, nor hold that forbidden which hath been forbidden by Allah and His Messenger, nor acknowledge the religion of Truth, (even if they are) of the People of the Book, until they pay the Jizya with willing submission, and feel themselves subdued.”
    This verse is the basis for spreading hatred to all mankind outside of Islam (Jihad), the people who do not accept Islam as their religion.
    I wonder is this verse coming from Allah or Satan? Certainly not from God!

    3. The most important thing is, they have a Books called Quran, Hadiths and Sunnah!!.”

  82. 347
    Top gear on record says:

    Loverly day today. Feel for the saddos who stayed indoors to watch a Jock play a game of tennis.

    • 372
      Universal Hiss says:

      Well.I rejigged my sempervivums & gave them a little extra gravel in between sets.

      I then dug up a couple of ferns & potted them up in between sets.

      I made a chicken salad sandwich while watching the tennis & ate it.

      I paced myself during the match so missed very little. What did you do that was so exciting?

      I’m a loud & proud saddo,saddo.

  83. 348
    The BBC says:

    We are bitterly disappointed that Andy Murray is not black and transferred or gay. Instead he is horrendously white and heterosexual with a disturbingly attractive white girlfriend.

    • 355
      murray fancies his mum says:

      Watch that girlfriend of his. Take away the slap and hairdo and she is the spitting image of his mum and with all the same manerisms

  84. 351
    C.O.Jones says:

    Nice to see we British have won the mens singles at Wimbledon.

  85. 353
    Point of Information says:

    Whilst Labour are getting the thorough kicking they deserve, let us not forget about the wayward pervert party known as Liberal Democrats, and Clegg’s wife little charity funding faux pas.

    Perhaps not time for cross-hairs just yet – but it is looking, smelling, sounding and rumored to be allegedly a fraud of sorts.

    Screws need to be gently but firmly tightened checking with a torque wrench frequently. :-D

    And Yewtree / Fairbanks / Fernbridge and the other p3d0 related stuff Watson set in motion should be getting some real results now – shouldn’t they ?

    • 358
      Tachybaptus says:

      Perhaps the cross-hairs picture could be replaced with one like the WinZip icon, showing a screw press gradually squashing the person’s face from above.

      • 370
        Point of Information says:


        But replace the face with a stack of 3 books. One coloured red, another yellow and the third one blue.

        Make sure the wing nut of the G clamp has a yellow / purple feel ;-)

  86. 357
    Rod Laver meets Ed Labour says:
    • 359
      Falkirk Chatter says:

      Looks like Salmond and Dave are doing a deal in the background.

    • 368
      john inverdale says:

      looks like Paul Gascoigne

      hes a minger too

    • 376
      Rod Laver says:

      Great day for Andy at Wimbledon! It such a perfect day. Marred only by some idiot called edmilioionbrand or something, wittering on about how excited he was to be siting next to the actual Rod Hull.

      What a creepy guy he was.

    • 386
      pigs in space says:

      Dull Boy and Rodney

    • 404
      Muppet watch says:

      Rod looks like Les Battersby from Corrie.

      Ed looks like Goofy

    • 413
      Posh Spice. says:

      Did Millitwat, Camermong and Rab C Nesbit queue and pay for their tickets?

  87. 377
    Gordon the medicated says:

    Slightly uncomfortable feeling.
    If they can kick Abu Qatada out, they could kick anybody out.

    I shall dig the bunker a few feet deeper. Just in case.

  88. 380
    The Sod says:

    Why no minutes silence and black ties at Wimbledon, where is the mention of the murder of 52 people by Islam on this day the 7/7 2005. Is it because it might upset a certain minority.

    • 407
      Tay King-dePisse says:

      Oh, the British don’t wear all that Innocent-People-Killed shit on their sleeves when it’s Brits being victimised. How dreadfully American of a thing to do, reminding people of an horrendous loss of life! C’est trop gauche!

      Well, for the upper classes anyway– there are some British who never bloody shut up about people who were killed at a football match a quarter of a century ago (and not by terrorists, either). And like that poster at 2:55 pm, it ain’t the Italians at Heysel whom they’re banging on about.

  89. 411
    Universal Hiss says:

    Give this a look & despair……..


    She probably thinks Ian Brady’s a good bloke.

    • 414

      Silly cow will champion the cause of one person who is in all probability is still a risk without any concern for the thousands who have been blown to smithereens or who now have body parts missing which simply will not grow again.

      Vacuity knows no bounds.

  90. 419
    She who is nameless says:

    How come Murray’s girlfriend never looks at the TV camera looking at her?

    She must surely be aware that the BBC shows more of her facial features than they do of Murray playing tennis.

    Odd thing is. does anyone know her name?

    • 422
      Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

      Maybe she was brought up properly, in that it is rude to stare.

    • 423
      Benefit free zone says:


    • 425
      Why are radio5 presenters so fucking cheerful says:

      Kate innit ? and she’s watching her boyfriend and not excited about mongs watching her on’t telly

  91. 421
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    Another two victories i forgot to add earlier :-)

    Justin Rose US Open golf victor under Cameron.

    Lions rugby victorious under Cameron.

  92. 426
    I say, I say,I say says:

    There’s a fella down our street wot hasn’t got a Knighthood

  93. 428
    Lest we forget says:

    Fred Perry was English.

  94. 429
    Asslick Almond says:
  95. 430
    Owen Jones' proctologist says:

    The Labour Uncut article posted on Guido’s homepage has been removed following legal action from Unite. Unite absolutely won’t stop until they have what they want – a secretly populated Westminster stocked with their mob. Its worse than it ever was – they’ve deliberately merged into the super union (Unite) to concentrate the entire left wing and on the basis of about 15% of trade union members using their resources to fund an agenda not supported by average members.

    Its like aliens trying to take over the earth posing as humans. Insipid. If Miliband won’t cut them off then it just proves he’s the Manchurian Candidate.

    • 432
      Tachybaptus says:

      It’s Miliband who’s insipid. Unite is insidious, or at least I think that’s what you meant.

    • 441
      Fu Man Chu says:

      He’s nothing to do with us. Try the freemasons.

  96. 431
    A Bubble So Big We Can't Even See It says:

    The Titanic is unsinkable!

  97. 434
    Tholer says:

    An interesting and informative article in the Scotsman, Guido, which is well worth a read.

    “Lesley Riddoch: Labour cynicism the real scandal”


  98. 451
    The EU says:

    Good Morning.

    It’s going to be a fine day.

  99. 455
    albacore says:

    With the mass immigration Parliament espouses
    Guess what – there ain’t now and there won’t be enough houses
    Still, whatever you do, don’t go and blame the E U
    We’d have a referendum right now if that were true
    Mind you, with all the houses M Ps seem to acquire
    Maybe they don’t see the situation as so dire


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Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

Rod Liddle on the loony UN sexism special rapporteur:

“There is more sexism in Britain than in any other country in the world, according to a mad woman who has been sent here by the United Nations.

Rashida Manjoo is a part-time professor of law at Cape Town University in the totally non-sexist country of South Africa (otherwise known as Rape Capital Of The World).

Mrs Magoo has been wandering around with her notebook and is appalled by the sexist “boys’ club” culture here, apparently.

I don’t doubt we still have sexism in the UK. But is it worse than in, say, Saudi Arabia, d’you think, honey-lamb? Or about 175 other countries? Get a grip, you doolally old bat.”

orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?

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