May 15th, 2013

Unemployment Figures in Full

The line Labour types will be pushing today, the January to March figures compared with the previous three months:

And the saving grace for Osborne, this month compared to last:

Select as per partisan preference. Those figures in full here. Essentially little has changed…


  1. 1
    Devious thick Dave says:

    Could be worse, we could have figures like Spain & Greece.


  2. 2
    cliche says:

    Every little helps.


  3. 3
    hiram hackenbacker says:

    Don’t forget the JSA numbers…


  4. 4
    CCHQ Press Officer says:

    Please don’t try to put a “spin” on those disgraceful figures.

    Let’s just leave that to Owen Jones,thank you.


    • 9
      Owen Jones says:

      You called !!

      Think I’ve misunderstood this! Thought the unemployment figures were commendable.

      I have “tweeted” George Osborne accordingly.


      • 18
        One term Cameron says:

        Is “Tweeted” a euphemism for gay sex?


      • 32
        Steve_o_Herts says:

        I imagine George Osborn has blocked you in the same way that you block those who disagree with your deluded viewpoints and hysterical interjections.


        • 48
          Anonymous says:

          A rather hypocritical comment on a site which habitually does the same (which is why I am forced to go anonymous).


          • Edith Milliband says:

            Aaah did that nasty Guido upset you then?


          • Maqboul says:

            Yes, the site does seem to have become ban happy of recent. You don’t have to even swear or say something contentious. You just need to make a point that the site owner disagrees with.


          • and says:

            His site, his rules.
            If you don’t like it, piss off.


          • Anonymous says:

            I find that posting details of Guidos wife, children and Russian connections on the Zelo Street blog relieves the tension.


  5. 5
    Anonymous says:

    NE England worst performing region with almost 10% unemployment and 7% claimants. But compared to Spain? Sadly, we’re still laughing.


    • 7
      On Yer Bike, Hornbeam says:

      Cue whinging tales of pickerel northerners expecting free money.


      • 28
        Pickeral Northerner says:

        Give me my free money!

        I’ve only paid 000’s in Tax for the last 10 years, after all………..


  6. 6
    Is Abbott Sorry? says:

    So after Abbott’s outburst against demented people and given Dave’s new effort to increase care for dementia sufferers and their families.

    Will the Shadow public health minister be apologising?


    • 8
      Maqb­oul says:

      Will she do the decent thing and resign in shame?


      • 26
        Steve_o_Herts says:

        Abbott and decent really cant be used in the same breath. She is a failed politician.


        • 36
          Diane Fatbott says:

          More of a fat politician I’d say.


          • Jerk Sauce says:

            How can Labour have a health spokeswomen who is very obese?

            If she can’t even look after her own health, why is she trusted to talk about everyone else’s?


          • Sir Bumley Foghorn MP (Much Ranting in the Shires) says:

            For those with the stomach for a view of what the offspring of Uncle Eric Pickles and Abbott would look like try googling Windell Middlebrooks. A charming man with an alarming appearance.


      • 29
        Abbot makes me want to puke says:

        Abbot has absolutely no shame. She is a ranting, hypocritical demogogue that only retains power by playing the race card at every turn, deliberately causing division and race hatred to further her own political ambitions. She is a disgrace to civilisation and the democratic process. She has all the credibility of Goebbels.

        Basically she is warm dog vomit in a soggy paper bag and still she has the gall to put her ugly fat fizzog on the telly at every opportunity and pontificate to the nation her ill-informed opinions delicately spice with her very own brand of racism.


      • 112
        Smack an MP When You See One says:

        Will she do the decent thing and have her jaw wired?


    • 15
      Munching through her 6th fried breakfast of the day, Shadow Health Minister Abbot says:

      *nom* *nom* *munch* *munch* *burp*


      *chomp* *chomp* *fart*

      PS: Wayyyyyycist!


    • 37
      Pickeral Northerner says:

      Not even worth arguing with…


    • 86
      The BBC causes serious mental illness says:

      It is somewhat Orwellian that the Shadow Health minister should be initiating ad-hominem attacks by ridiculing serious health conditions such as dementia.

      Even more poorly times as the UN is in the process of launching a very big program to address the global problem faced by this condition.

      Perhaps it is time for this fat troughing racist pig of a woman to be put on a political care pathway somewhere permanently out of public life.

      She is an embarrassment to her community.


  7. 9
    Power Crazed Balls says:

    What about all that QE?

    Seems to have little effect except for a likely future explosion in inflation….


    • 14
      An economist says:

      I like this Parliamentary report





    • 20
      Andrew Efiong says:

      It’s sent my equity portfolio rocketing up. Very nice, I’m up £80,000 this year alone. Tasty!


    • 38
      Most people don't understand economics says:

      We’ve already had the inflation. Don’t you remember property prices going through the roof as everyone outbid their neighbours for their next new home using money pulled out of a hat by Northern Crock?

      That was the inflation. Now the BofE is just turning all the bad debts into printed cash (shame they didn’t just give the cash to everyone cheated into bad debts by corrupt banks but that’s the political class for you). Monetising bad debt doesn’t cause inflation – it prevents deflation. That’s what the EU refuses to do and that is what is causing a massive recession all over the Eurozone with close to 30% unemployment in some areas.


  8. 11
    Nigel says:

    posted again without the filter bashing stuff

    first UKIP councillor goes for doing a r acist. even quicker than the B N P managed I think


    • 74
      Don't Drink Wine and Go Online says:

      I’d have had more respect for the man if it wasn’t for:

      ‘he posted the pictures and comments to “show how bad they are”‘


  9. 12
    Euro death cancer says:

    Thank God we aren’t in the Eurozone. Worst finances than Spain but ONE QUARTER the unemployment rate!

    When is Johnny Foreigner going to click on that the EU is screwing them????


    • 16
      Spanish worker says:

      We work in the black economy stupid…


    • 17
      Slowpoke Rodriguez says:

      Spain is shafted anyway. They’ve got public sector waste and widespread socialism, they’d be smashed in or out of the EU, only being in the EU brings them mucho subsidy.


      • 91
        Vote Tory, get heir to Blair says:

        If they were out of the EU they would have their own currency again and it would be so cheap it would encourage Brits and others to go back to Spain for their holidays. It would also help the housing industry which has lost millions of jobs on hotel/apartment/villa buildings,etc.

        Same goes for Greece, Cyprus and Portugal. That’s one reason why it is mainly Mediterranean countries that are struggling the most.


  10. 13
    Steve_o_Herts says:

    Isn’t it the post Olympic, post Christmas peak, falling back to norm? Compounded by rotten rotten winter weather? I blame the Lithuanians for taking our jobs.


  11. 21
  12. 23
    Swervin' Mervyn says:

    I saved the world with my chum Brown

    I had to because I let the biggest financial bubbles in history grow

    And they then exploded on me…

    But we now have 0.2% growth from a low base, so everything is fine and I will retire on my gold plated pension (the rest of the gold I sold)


  13. 27
    Steve Miliband says:

    What’s the increase in ‘sex gangs’?


    • 39
      Parkis says:

      Do you mind? We immigrants are part of the important service sector. We provide useful work for the young female unemployed.


    • 41
      The Glorious Multi-Culti Labour Parteh says:

      Up 300%. A fine Labour achievement. If you disagree, you’re a racist and will have to resign from your job and be spat at in the street.


      • 53
        speak out says:

        When Labour were in power such “sex” gangs felt untouchable. The authorities turned a blind eye for fear of accusations of racisim.
        Thankfully that attitude appears to have stopped and these girls will finally get the justice they deserve.


        • 63
          Sir Bumley Foghorn MP (Much Ranting in the Shires) says:

          When the Great Leader was in power such goings on were confined to Kincora, North Wales, the Elm Guest House and the like. Kept many a cabinet minister occupied.


          • how low can you sink says:

            There has always been abuse.
            But the recent organised gangs in places like Rochdale,Derby,Manchester and Oxford have taken it to a whole new level.
            Plying children with drink,crack and heroin before raping, torturing, prostituting and trafficking them.


          • Lord Stansted says:

            Oxford, the city of dreaming spires and fuck’d children.


          • Point of Information says:

            There has been no mention of the abuse going on at Oxford and Cherwell Valley College, or the muzzie guy who has been trying to expose this.

            Important for balance as not all muzzies are into child prostitution / trafficking, only a sensationalized minority.

            Seems like Thames Valley Police are oddly not interested, their are implications that officers may well be involved in the abuse.

            Perhaps these grooming chaps should have signed up at a different lodge ?


  14. 31
    Fact says:

    How many immigrants are there? If they hadn’t been let in unemployment would be a million less at least, even allowing for the immigrants that are themselves unemployed and on benefits.

    Well done LibLabConners. What a PC fuck up


  15. 33
    Lord Fondlebum says:

    We shall send out search parties to find work for them. Or is it the other way round? I am entirely relaxed.


  16. 35
    S P 4 B S says:

    So, the spin for george is that (43-15 )= 28,000 jobs were lost and the people didn’t appear in the statistics.



  17. 40
    Anonymous says:

    Headline Reuters:

    “Jobless claimant count falls sharply in April”

    Headline BBC:

    “UK unemployment rises to 2.52 million”


    • 46
      The BBC are cunts says:



    • 47
      A Nonny Mouse says:

      But you don’t say which headline you deem most accurate?


    • 51
      What a coincidence! says:

      Who’d have thunked it?

      UK unemployment: 2.52 million.

      Net migration to Britain (1997-2010): 2.2million.


      • 61
        Fruit Basket says:

        You have heard the phrase ‘apples and pears’ then…?


        • 90
          Political points says:

          You have heard of the phrase: ‘Economic migrants undercutting local labour costs in an environment where no new job positions are created’ ?

          For propaganda to work it doesn’t matter if it is true or not, it just needs to be credible. To paraphrase Goebbels.

          To really work it needs to resonate with public opinion.


  18. 42
    The NHS Dental way says:

    I remember all the wailing and gnashing of teeth when Maggie decided those who can, will have to pay a fair sum towards their dentistry. Something by the way that Labour never repealed.

    But now that it has all settled down I think people can see that on the whole it was a good thing and the more enlightened can see the broader NHS should go down the same path.

    Some NHS dentistry highlights for me.

    The genuine poor, children and pensioners pay nowt.

    Time wasters don’t want to waste their money so largely do not exist.

    NHS patients can top up their treatment by paying the difference and not the full cost.


    • 58
      Romany Blythe says:

      It’s terriblist that the oppressed have to pay for their dentist.
      Give me another boob job.


      • 68
        Taxpayer says:

        Romany, your boob job if not medically required would be treated the same as teeth whitening, you would have to pay and not me.


    • 59
      The Bumper Book of Labour Lies says:

      “Prime Minister Tony Blair has promised that everybody will have easy access to an NHS dentist within the next two years.” BBC News, Tuesday September 28th, 1999.


      • 109
        45 Minutes to save the World says:

        AND I believe he belived it after all he’s straightsortaguy !! He would NEVER lie to the electorate !!


  19. 43
    Mark Serwotka says:

    0.1% is a resounding success.


  20. 49
    Diane Abbott and Chuka Umunna says:

    You’re all demented trash.


    • 57
      Lash OUT at all those around says:

      That is those two in a nutshell.

      They hate the world, they are insecure and they have large chips on their shoulders. and resort to the time honoured tradition of throwing insults at anyone who is not of their cultures.


  21. 50
    tired of the same old shit says:

    labour types …. haha …. how condescending

    how about this for you fascist types


    • 66
      Labour's voters should be rounded up and gassed. says:

      Oooh! “Condescending”. Bought a thesaurus, have we?


    • 84
      err says:

      I don’t mind people having lots of personal wealth as long as they spend it. They should be encouraged to spend it in the UK economy by things been made here that people want.


      • 89
        err says:

        being FFS


      • 120
        Most people don't understand economics says:

        The £ can only be spent in the UK, so it all comes back into the UK economy eventually. That is the beauty of having your own currency. Unlike the Euro which can be made in Spain and Greece and spent in Germany. The f**kwits in Greece and Spain have yet top realise that yet, the Krauts have been screwing them for a decade and laughing all the way to a German bank.


  22. 70
    He deserves to be skinned alive and rolled in salt says:

    Given how unpopular child r-pists and killers are in prison, I hope Stuart Hazell gets the living shit kicked out of him day and night for the next 38 years.


  23. 72
    tanzanite says:

    UK’s unemployment rate is well below that of France and Italy who are both in double figures and rising and not far behind Germany which are 5.8 I think. Spain of course is now a basket case.

    As for youth employment bullyballs favourite topic , although he always forgets to tell us that he presided over massive rises in youth unemployment, it has fallen 46000 since last year.

    So we’re not doing so bad . A lot better I suspect than we would have been if gordon, balls and militwit were still in power.


    • 108
      Spend ! Spend ! Spend ! says:

      Never mind after May 2015 Labour will be back on track to ruin the economy again


  24. 75
    Well at least on this she should be an authority #FFS says:


    • 77
      Well at least on this she should be an authority #FFS says:


  25. 76
    Owen Jones says:

    Kind of want the education secretary to mount a leadership bid and call for Cameron to quit purely for the headline: “IT’S TIME TO GOVE!”


  26. 80
    Moussa Koussa Mark 8 says:

    Guido your statistical gobblegook has come straight from Gove The Gimp’s book on analysis.

    This is level of spin ( which Tory HQ have advised you to broadcast ) is quite hilarious

    *** Example Gudio ****

    Unemployment figure in May 2013 is 2.56 million

    Unemployment figure in May 1982 was 3.12 million

    Therefore Unemployment has fallen by over 15% .

    This is how ridiculous your analysis is Guido.


  27. 88
    Watch your back Nick !! says:

    Tory Eurosceptics preparing to “smack Clegg all around the Chamber”(metaphorically speaking) as he is doing PMQs to-day…Dave having decided to prolong his visit “Stateside”…. a very wise move.

    Suggested questions: “Does my Right Honourable Friend like myself regret that there is no mention of an in/out referendum on the United Kingdom’s membership of the European Union in the Queen’s Speech ?”

    “Can my Right Honourable friend explain to the British people why he is against allowing the British People a say on United Kingdom’s membership of the European Union ?”

    Oh dear it will all end in tears !!


    • 93
      PMQ Prediction says:

      Dave was bumming around with Prince Harry in the meat packing district of NY the other day. So we know roughly what he’s up to.

      Ed is probably going to give Clegg a full political blowjob today, and the Tory back benches. It will be much more sinister if they are quiet and do not ask awkward questions…


  28. 92
    Cato Street Conspirator says:

    The most interesting of the figures is ‘… regular pay rose by 0.8% (the lowest growth rate since comparable records began in 2001′. But prices, particularly energy prices, soar. Is it any wonder then that confidence is low, the High Street is devastated and the ConLib government is all over the place?


    • 103
      Vince Incapable says:


      Ed hasn’t said he’d do anything any different.


    • 117
      Rip van Wrinkle says:

      And in an economy 70% dependent on consumer spending and with a manufacturing sector that has output well below levels seen in 2008 could someone tell me where the f*ck the ‘growth’ is going to come from?


      • 118
        Most people don't understand economics says:

        Um, yeah, all economies rely on consumption as well as production. And your point is???


  29. 94
    PMQ Prediction says:

    Dave was bumming around with Prince H’rryin the meat packing district of NY the other day. So we know roughly what he’s up to.

    Ed is probably going to give Clegg a full political blowjob today, and the Tory back benches. It will be much more sinister if they are quiet and do not ask awkward questions…


    • 99

      Ed is going to shaft Clegg on his “The liberals are the ONLY party offering a choice of a referendum on Europe’ pamphlet.


      • 107
        Manifesto promises are not promises just aspirations says:

        Ed Miliband intends to concede a referendum just ahead of the GE in 2015..although if there is a likely Coalition of Labour and LibDems after the election it’s pretty safe to say that nothing will happen and Ed will avoid having to hold one and can blame the LibDems just as Dave is doing.

        Once again the electorate will have been taken for suckers by theLibLabCon Alliance


      • 110
        PMQ Prediction says:


        But the pamphlet is only out there to try and deflate the notion that referendum is ruled out totally, contrary to public opinion.

        Ed / Labour must be figuring out that their outright no position is untenable, now they have seen some hard evidence: Election results, polls, comment sections of press etc. etc.

        So: LibLabCon complex is offering the following at present on referendum:

        Con: Yes(ish)
        – b/s attempt at a law which will serve no purpose but attempt to deflate opinion stoked by outright no

        Lib: Yes(ish)
        – Pamphlet and nothing of real substance, to win middle ground and deflate opinion stoked by outright no

        Lab: No
        – This and Cameron’s outright lies has really stimulated demand.

        Then you have the real opposition:

        UKIP : Yes
        – Simple. No direct power yet, but if voted for will give referendum. Credibility increased as they have succeeded already in opening the debate, much to the chagrin of Cameron et al.

        Labour realize that they need to be out there with the pamphlet, and also that they would prefer to be in coalition with Lib rather than UKIP after next GE. They would much rather have outright power, but that is highly unlikely to happen.

        Labour coalition with Conservative after next GE would be perverse.

        This is why Ed may be nice to Clegg today.

        If he does vilify on the pamphlet this will push more votes towards UKIP, from Labour, and give more ammunition to the more hard line left.


  30. 97
    Vote Tory, get heir to Blair says:

    “Eurozone recession continues into sixth quarter”.

    Where are the loony Europhiles now?


    • 102
      Vince Incapable says:

      The EU is essential for jobs and trade .. and .erm..holidays…and..olives and tea towels from Benidorm..and ..erm..dark chocolate…and … erm…erm.. castanets..well..we wouldn’t have any of those things if we aren’t in the EU.


    • 104
      Anonymong says:

      Spending their share of our £55 million per day charitable contribution.


    • 111
      Noose Watch says:

      They are not swinging from streetlights yet, give it another couple of quarters.


    • 113
      Economist says:

      According to some schools of thought, 10 straight quarters of economic contraction is a technical depression.

      Come on Euro Zone, you can do it !


  31. 98
    Francois Hollande says:

    Si vous voyez Mr Miliband, Je voudrais emprunter 300.000,000,000 EUR.


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