March 21st, 2013

Guidogram Going Out Shortly

The Guidogram round-up of the week is going out shortly.

Thousands of Westminster insiders read the Guidogram, everyone from Downing Street insiders to Fleet Street never miss it. All your budget and press regulation reaction, plus tell Evan Harris and Hacked Off Hugh to Blog Off!

Join the conspiracy and become a subscriber to the Guidogram, free, to keep in the loop. You’re either in front of Guido, or behind…


  1. 1
    Gordon Brown says:



    • 3
      Brownian Motion says:

      Start again.


    • 17
      Tay King-dePisse says:

      Only in postal voting, Mongo, but I suppose that’s the kind of thing you’re familiar with, and it was a natural mistake on your part.


      • 22
        Curly says:

        No, not only in postal voting. 1 + 1 does equal 3. If it doesn’t, perhaps you could tell us all where you came from?


  2. 2
    It's a fix says:

    It only went out yesterday. Surely


  3. 5
    Chris H says:

    Day 11 on the N*nce Wing. Played chess with ‘Groper’. He wanted to hold my bishop. Declined. Then he said he would show me some ‘Grade 4 pawns’. I think he is mad.


  4. 6
    Vince Cable says:

    I don’t remember chip shop queues.


  5. 7
    Anonymous says:

    Paying lots of tax prevents you from:

    Buying drugs
    Buying too much food
    Drinking too much
    Buying cheap Chinese imports
    Buying Korean cars


  6. 12
    Ed Miliband says:

    Could anyone advise me on how to open a bank account in Cyprus?


  7. 14
    Waynetta Slob says:

    I am having a fag!


  8. 15

    What happens when a leftie Kenyan tries to sort out centuries problems he knows nothing about:


    • 16
      compromise says:

      Solomon believed in dividing the child if neither party would accept the lack of parentage details.
      Same with the land. Split it between them according to the old recomendations with Jerusalem remaining a Holy City for all beliefs.


    • 20
      Jimmy says:

      Are you suggesting that some disharmony may break out in the region now?


    • 24
      Curly says:

      Thyis is a difficult one. Let me think…

      Does he get assassinated by some loony jihadist?


  9. 18
    Another week wasted arsing around with stupid old bags, thick students and scrounging, Labour voting dogshite in Edinburgh. says:



  10. 19
    One of the revolting plebs voting for the NEW Government UKIP.Org says:

    So pleased to see that Pinochio Dave aka CMDDD has finally sealed his fate

    with his bungled Political Control of the PRESS legislation along with his

    partners little Ed & his now dirty blank sheet of paper & no Nation ever

    again, along EU luving LibDims by really pi*ssing off The Dirty Digger as a

    result…….the ConsLieLaborLibDims must all be congratulated in creating

    legalistic cess pit, because of these para*sits, pim*ps & lee*chs thirst for

    vengence after the MP’s expenses scandal. May I suggest to all of these

    self righteous ver*min, to take the opportunity to enjoy there Tax Payer

    subsidised Booze & Food in one the “35 locations” within the Palace of

    Westminster while they can, for its certain that Pinochio Dave will decide

    to cut & run (No Ba*lls or Spine) sooner rather than later !!! BUT is now

    guaranteed The Dirty Digger won’t be helping through his media outlets

    the ConsLieLaborLibDims to be kept in the style they have all become

    accustomed & expect & demand …..The Cull has already started………

    BTW Understand these Para*sites, Pim*ps & Lee*ches are not charged VAT

    @ Palace of Westminster no wonder its only £2.20 a Pint…..with discounts like

    this only the great unwashed are forced to pay all of the blo*ody taxes…..

    here pheasants have a whole 1p off of a pint……don’t forget to grovel to

    these Bull*ington wan*kers & say Thank You…… now get along……..


  11. 26
    The Boy Plunger says:

    I would like to know how much money has been transferred from Cypriot Banks to British French and German Banks in the last 12 months .


  12. 27
    Furious from Corby says:

    Why is my Prime Minister now flooding Cyprus with bits of paper ?


Seen Elsewhere

Tory MP Tells Leftie Jon Snow to Retire | Guardian
Russell Brand’s New Book “Sub-Undergraduate Dross” | Telegraph
Tory MP Barrister Represents Monaco Billionaire | Scrapbook
MOBO Singers Slam UKIP | ITV
Could UKIP Keep Britain in the EU? | Iain Martin
Why Piketty is Wrong | ConHome
Guido Whips Politicians Into Shape | Guardian
Milburn Levelling Down | Kathy Gyngell
Crosby and Carswell Make Friends at Guido’s Dinner | Mail
Mrs Danczuk Beats Mensch to Win Guido | Telegaph
PM Congratulates Blogger Who Destroyed Minister | Mail

Find out more about PLMR

Rob Colvile reviews Russell Brand’s new book:

“Oddly, the person I feel sorriest for isn’t Brand himself – although he certainly comes across as a rather pitiable figure, projecting his own brokenness on to the world around him – but Johann Hari. Drummed out of Fleet Street for plagiarism, the former Independent columnist has washed up as “my mate Johann, who’s been doing research for this book”. For a genuinely talented polemicist, it would have been a humbling experience to have to treat this sub-undergraduate dross as the scintillating wisdom of a philosopher-king.”

Mycroft says:

Have you read the last bit of Animal Farm?

You know where the animals are looking through the Farmhouse window?

My TV screen was that window at lunch-time today.

Be careful, the sudden self-congratulatory tone, the slightly pudgy outline of indulgence and you become exactly what you should despise.

The jolly face of the Quisling Cameron poses for your camera has mesmerised and deceived you, you who were once not so deceived.

You were no firebrand, you were a damp squib in my opinion, sorry.

You need a damned good kick up the ahse!

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