March 20th, 2013

Treasury Leak Entire Budget to Standard Before Osborne Up

Their embargoed look at the budget has leaked before the Chancellor even stands up:

  • Planned fuel duty hike scrapped
  • 1p off a pint but cider up 2p, wine up 10p and spirits up 38p.
  • Borrowing up to £61bn
  • Income tax allowance will rise to £10,000 by April 2014
  • Corporation tax cut to 20% by 2015
  • Growth will apparently reach 1.8% next year, 2.3% by 2015. No Triple Dip.
  • £2,000 cut to employer NI contributions.

Terrible economic news but cheaper beer.


UPDATE II:  Editor Sarah Sands has released this statement:

“An investigation is immediately underway into how this front page was made public and the individual who Tweeted the page has been suspended while this takes place. We have immediately reviewed our procedures. We are devastated that an embargo was breached and offer our heartfelt apologies.”


  1. 1
    Wake Me Up says:

    Well….what do expect…..with chillaxing Cameron…..sonambulist Osbourne…..dreary Hague….this government is drifting, sleepwalking.

    It’s a slow car crash….no wonder the Standard lost it’s patience. I know I have.

  2. 2
    Simon Hefferlump says:

    Treasury caught by their own spin and the crony technique of embargoes and handing out info to low grade newspapers.

    Lebedev and his Evening Standard get their socks regulated off.

  3. 3
    Jack irvine says:

    £1million fine or Scoop of the Year?

  4. 4
    goodon Broown says:

    Haha! No suspects its me in disguise!

  5. 5
    Dr Oein Clerke says:

    Borrowing even more?

    Ed Balls will be delighted

  6. 6
    Grommit says:

    How many pints do I have to drink to get my foreign aid contribution back?

  7. 7
    Equalizer1963 says:

    1p off a pint….so if I consume 350, I would have saved enough to purchase one more pint. Brill…that’s my goal this weekend then.

  8. 8
    The Good Old Days says:

    They should go back to how it was done.



  9. 9
    Winning in Britain says:

    Corporation tax cut to 20% by 2015


  10. 10
    Fishy says:

    Russians break an agreed embargo. Withdraw their licence.

  11. 11
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Standard hacked off by deals with Hacked Off?

  12. 12
    Bag o' Shite says:

    Borrowing up… tut tut tut.

  13. 13
    Small Business says:

    No cut in VAT.

  14. 14
    Royal Charter says:

    Do I get to regulate this rag?

  15. 15
    Moussa Koussa Mark 7 says:

    errrrr…I think it was Geoff Webster who gave Guido the job at the Sun

    Oh Dear !!!!!!

  16. 16
    Rewind1616 says:

    Well I’m wasting my time watching this shite then

  17. 17
    Moussa Koussa Mark 7 says:


    Not a single ordinary voter even knows what CT is !!!!!

  18. 18
    Casual Observer says:

    They want to front run the market.

    The only thing they care about is the gilt yields not going against them.

  19. 19
    Winning in Britain says:

    Even the thickest Labour councillor knows what a strong private sector is.

  20. 20
    A plane full of flying euros says:

    So that should get things sorted

  21. 21
    AAA says:

    What about me?

  22. 22
    Sane people everywhere says:

    Its a big fap fap day for you.
    Stop posting shite and crack one off.

  23. 23
    HoC Bunfight says:

    Fight kicking off. Balls on a warning.

  24. 24
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Balls told off by Deputy Speaker- let us not become a circus.

  25. 25
    Whingewhingewhinge says:

    Bored after 1 minute. Presentation and content rubbish

  26. 26
    BBB says:

    Hello..I don’t think we’ve been properly introduced.

  27. 27
    Casual Observer says:

    It does look like the gilts are selling off a bit, as is GBP.

    More QE definitely required, especially if UK is shown to be in recession again next month.

  28. 28
    Small Business says:

    Fantasy growth figures again

  29. 29
    Eric Joyce says:

    I’m 2p up on the day already!

  30. 30
    The Gadget Inspector says:

    The EU are about to foul up big time in Cyprus which will impact on UK Banks .

    Cameron has nicely positioned himself on the outside of all this so he can do some finger pointing when the brown stuff starts flying.

  31. 31
    Small Business says:

    Don’t give me a tribute, give me a VAT cut

  32. 32
    Grommit says:

    600k new jobs.. just in time for those lovely Romanians!

  33. 33
    Alan Johnson says:

    Corporation tax is something to do with buses isn’t it?

  34. 34
    Steve Miliband says:

    Where’s Hugh?

  35. 35
    sproggingforbenefits says:

    Well done George lets hear Ed Balls response hope it is better than 2012!

  36. 36
    England says:

    Ban them from entry. Its quite simple.

  37. 37
    Berk Ow Body Double says:

    Shut it Slaags!

  38. 38
    Mr Joyce, MP for North Thuggery says:

    You sound like my kind of Man- im going to punch you now.

  39. 39
    Balls living on Borrowed time says:

    I wonder if Balls can physically fight as tough as he makes out?

  40. 40

    While regulation is the hot topic, I understand that we are limited in our choices for MPs, but they’re right there in the commons along with the Speaker or Deputy Speaker. Is it out of the question to fine MPs who can’t keep their stupid mouths shut while somebody else is speaking, or is this, as with Glascow University, a practise officially frowned upon but in truth sanctioned?

  41. 41
    Lady De La Nuit says:

    Duunno *wipes mouth*

  42. 42
    Penfold says:

    Will he take the Chiltern Hundreds?

    Rather strange, that unlike the previous regime of B-Liar and McMental we have not had a steady stream of leaks re the budget.

  43. 43
    Eve Standard says:

    Ha Ha! You’re either in front of the Standard or behind.

  44. 44
    Simon Hefferlump says:

    Like all bullies, he’s a coward inside.

  45. 45
    Casual Observer says:

    On that note:

    Government estimates: 12,700, from the Government formula.

    As experienced with Poland some time back, these estimates are way under what happens in practice.

  46. 46
    Patriot says:

    He’s mortgaging our grandchildren’s future with ever growing debt

  47. 47
    Simoney Hughes Esq says:

    I’d like to have a coward inside..

  48. 48
    Boy George does not cut the mustard says:

    Tough talk from George but he sounds like a little boy so totally ineffective.

  49. 49
    Grommit says:

    No that was McBroon.. George is dipping in the great grandkids pocket money

  50. 50
    Huge Grant says:

    Um, oh….ermmm ahhh
    None of your erm ah… business, so I’ll be erm setting the errr Royal um Charter on you…..yes, c’mon sic him.

  51. 51
    Patriot says:

    Shrink the state even further. He should be aiming for 30%

  52. 52
    Penfold says:


    300,000 of ‘em, ready and waiting to jump-ship from Spain and Italy whose economies have done a Titanic and offer no benefits and get to ole Blighty.
    These bods have of course free entitlement to movement under the Schengen Agreement and will use it.

  53. 53
    Observer says:

    This is rather amusing granted that the Mr Lebedev, the proprietor of the Evening Standard, is (allegedly) one of Hacked Off’s super-rich backers.

  54. 54
    England says:

    I don’t care what he sounds like. i care about what he does.

  55. 55
    DonkeyDong says:

    Stop staring at my pils in the showers Mousey Klart or I’ll set Maggie’s hangbag on you.

  56. 56
    The Donkey Sanctuary in Downing Street says:

    Fucking amazing that the government can’t do the bleeding obvious. Are they afraid of Herman?

  57. 57
    Fed Up says:

    Unconventional? Is he going to buy BitCoins?

  58. 58
    Small Business says:

    More fantasy inflation targets

  59. 59
    the stench of hypocrisy says:

    So a paper owned by a Russian oligarch who helped finance Hacked Off, which wants legislation ensuring greater press responsibility, has broken an important embargo.
    Have I got that right?

  60. 60
    George Osborne says:

    Inflate away!

  61. 61
    Rip off the savers says:

    So, has he just given the BoE the go ahead for negative interest rates?

  62. 62
    DonkeyDong says:

    I’d like to see Brown swing from a lamp-post on Westminster Bridge.

  63. 63
    Fed Up says:

    Who but a Newbie Twat would put Carney folk in charge of the bank!

  64. 64
    George Osborne says:

    Why a government with a massive debt want the currency it is denominated in be worth less? I’ve absolutely no idea.

  65. 65
    The Donkey Sanctuary in Downing Street says:

    Would it not be easier and more sociable for George to shut the fuck up and invite the members to read all about his budget in the paper room over a lunchtime pint?

  66. 66
    Equalizer1963 says:

    Oh Hi Eric…you been released back in to the community then? I’ll let you punch me if your mate sorts my missus out as he’s good with the ladies I believe.

  67. 67
    Oil Tanker says:

    10 fucking years to turn around just the deficit alone… pfffff.

    Labour have a lot to answer for.

  68. 68
    Small Business says:

    What is he doing about the mountains of taxpayers’ cash which quangos and local authorities are still sitting on?

  69. 69
    Boo says:

    Still pssing away foreign aid.

  70. 70
    8illy's douche bag says:

    Cheeky ;)

  71. 71
    Jimmy says:

    “Growth will apparently reach 1.8% next year, 2.3% by 2015.”

    Of course it will.

  72. 72
    Hugh Dalton says:


    it is the only correct course to follow.

  73. 73
    UKIP all the way says:

    Take fucking pride in borrowing money to give away to fucking all types of corrupt Hunts around the world. I think to. Fuck you.

  74. 74
    Boo says:

    No civil service pay cuts

  75. 75
    Fed Up says:

    It’ll take more that 10yrs to fix the deficit.. on the other hand if Balls gets his mits on the wheel the IMF will sort it out sharpish..

  76. 76
    Casual Observer says:

    Unconventional monetary instruments: One suspects he is hinting again at negative interest rates still being on the table.

  77. 77
    Rub it in says:

  78. 78
    Nigel Biggles MEP, Leader of the Lemon Party says:

    300 billion, day one, all next door to you.

    No word of a lie.

  79. 79
    EU says:

    We’ll put a stop to that.

  80. 80
    Alan Johnson says:

    I had planned a growth of 56%.
    Or was it 6%?
    or was it minus 6% ?
    Or was it I can’t believe its not butter ?

  81. 81
    Simon Cowell says:

    X factor pay and Christmas Boxes. It’ll never catch on.

  82. 82
    Nicked says:

  83. 83
    D.I. Regan, Flying Squad says:

    Shat it shortarse! Get your clothes and get me a cup of tea!

  84. 84
    Equalizer1963 says:

    Yep…funny old world innit?

  85. 85
    Cunts says:

    Don’t watch it on BBC Two, some twat is fucking around with the sound and picture quality.

  86. 86
    Gordon Brown PFI Solutions Inc says:

    The table is only on lease

  87. 87
    Fed Up says:

    Nah.. it’s supposed to sound like total BS.

  88. 88
    Sal E Bercow says:

    *licks lips*

  89. 89
    BBc Deputy Head of Re-Vision says:

    He hehe.

  90. 90
    Execute Every Last Mother Fucking One of Them says:

    Yeah his source of bribes

  91. 91
    Quangos says:

    What about that bonfire?

  92. 92
    Casual Observer says:

    Agreed. They will be lucky to achieve real positive growth.

    OBR figures we know are rubbish.

    One suspects that they do naive linear projections. When based on the whacky numbers of the Labour credit boom years, that will lead to ridiculous growth estimates when compared against reality.

  93. 93
    Fed Up says:

    11.5B savings? Would that be cutting the Foreign Aid budget?

  94. 94
    Billy Smart says:

    I resent that

  95. 95
    Simon Hefferlump says:

    Who is this Murphy muppet?

  96. 96
    E.Joyce says:

    Aye that’s a capital idea, then I can gie him a kiss

  97. 97
    A plane full of flying euros says:

    He is on his feet now;

    perhaps he will resign just before he sits down.

  98. 98
    Bless their pointy little heads says:

    “Apologosing to them”, has the world gone mad?.

  99. 99
    Jeffrey Bernard says:

    Have a drink and get over it. At least it makes a change from LibDem leaks …

  100. 100
    Hugh Grant says:

    Who leaked my Budget

  101. 101
    UKIP all the way says:

    He’s dying on his arse up there. Worst presentation I’ve ever seen.

  102. 102
    Gordo McMong says:

    Think it was 0% growth Alan… oh I need a poo, where is Sue?

  103. 103
    Moby Dick says:

    The 2013 budget leak could be the 1st casualty of the royal charter

  104. 104
    Jimmy says:

    In fairness to the Standard, they can hardly have anticipated getting to budget day with the budget still not yet leaked.

  105. 105
    Stability for All says:


    Osborne storms the ban. Total control.

    Labour are NOWHERE and the Speaker has to reprimand Ed Balls for his shrill shouts.

    Mine’s a pint of ale please!

  106. 106
    Frack Away says:

    I felt the earth move, baby!

  107. 107
    Casual Observer says:

    I would suspect the table is on lease, and has been securitized, and sold at least 4 times over / rehypothecated to the moon and collateralized to provide backing for the current national debt. As a result UK is not doing to badly.

  108. 108
    stuart says:

    So you should be. Do you think your the new chancellor?

  109. 109
    Shergar says:

    The United Kingdom clearly a country going nowhere .

    I am offski and I am taking my gold with me.

  110. 110
    Cheaper Energy Bills says:

    Shale gas field allowance.

    Get a fracking move on!

  111. 111
    Gordo McMong says:

    Come come now.

  112. 112
    Anonymous says:

    Joe Murphy @ JoeMurphyLondon We shall be apologosing to them , and how will they do that oh lord? whatver even it means

  113. 113
    Casual Observer says:

    Good that fracking is firmly in the frame. Hopefully carbon tax has been completely ruled out.

  114. 114
    Jack Straw says:

    Fracking hell. My ship is coming in.

  115. 115
    Equalizer1963 says:

    …and lets not forget the £50,000,000 per day to EU to bankroll French farmers and our fishing rights to Spain. Is it just me that imagines French, German, Italian and Belgian Eurocrats sniggering behind their hands at how pathetic and gullible GB has become?

  116. 116
    Get Fracking says:

    The earth is moving, baby!

  117. 117
    Sheikh Bashar Banka says:

    And do not get £200 when you pass “Go” .

  118. 118
    Bradley Wiggens says:

    We’re winning the global race.

    20% corporation tax? I’ll have a bit of that.

  119. 119
    Vince Cable says:

    Got to feel sorry for Boy George. It could hardly have been worse today for him. There is time for him to lose his voice completely however.

  120. 120
    Gordo McMong says:

    Think I’ve had a leak… where is Sue?

  121. 121
    Gordon the Medicated says:

    Tractor production..{mumble mumble}…zero % growth..{mumble ..mumble}… highest ever spending in history of world..{wipes nose with tie}…abolish 10p tax rate, this will affect nobody because I say it won’t ..{mumble mumble..Scottish mumble}…more tractors even while I have been speaking…

  122. 122
    Casual Observer says:

    Market really liking what he is saying right now, especially that shale gas announcement methinks.

    (Hopefully they are not going to shut down the coal stations later this year…)

  123. 123
    Sheikh Bashar Banka says:

    This definitely sounds a little dodgy in any language.

  124. 124
    Lady De La Nuit says:

    .. ooh that might have been me! Where’s my money honey?

  125. 125
    Starky says:

    Remember that a Standard is just a Rag on Pole.

  126. 126
    Simon Hefferlump says:

    I love it.

    The Greens will be all shirty about it but they prefer we buy gas from the Russians and Saudis, funding their nasty governments.

  127. 127
    Vince Cable says:

    Who’s Boy George and where am I?

  128. 128
    Simon Hefferlump says:

    I’ll have a bit of that too. Quite tasty too.

  129. 129
    Sheikh Bashar Banka says:

    There is a precedent to follow here so why do you not mention it?

  130. 130
    Ed Sillyband says:

    “I don’t care what he sounds like…”

    Bless you! That means I have a chance in 2015?

  131. 131
    Casual Observer says:

    This bit is very good news.

    If they can get top rate income tax down to 40% or maybe even 38%, then you would see a new and genuine boom in UK.

  132. 132
    Sheikh Bashar Banka says:

    Well let us all hope you are in the queue at the Job Centre.

  133. 133
    Accidentally on Common Purpose says:


  134. 134
    Lady De La Nuit says:

    Fark orf! I ain’t paying that much! My Hugh said I didn’t have to declare any of his payments

  135. 135
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Like this?

  136. 136
    Vince Cable says:

    I don’t remember joining a coalition.

    I checked my diary for May 10th 2010 and it said “Nothing of note…Watched episode of Lewis… Had a steak and kidney pie with some peas… did not try to form coalition with anyone that would talk to me.”

  137. 137
    Starbucks says:

    I am quaking in my froth

  138. 138
    Casual Observer says:

    Bad news for Barclays on the tax avoidance stuff. :-)

  139. 139
    Simon Hefferlump says:


    Back it up with a pledge to keep these rates fixed and we’ll be well ahead.

  140. 140
    Accidentally on Common Purpose says:

    How can someone who ‘works hard and gets on’ and wants to be independent of the state be supported by the state?

  141. 141
    Moby Dick says:

    It’s a tractor stats budget

  142. 142
    Pensioner 2B says:

    So I just have to live to 150 to get a good return on my NIs. Great!

  143. 143
    Grauniad says:

    At least he can spell ‘absolotely’.

  144. 144
    Sheikh Bashar Banka says:

    How much money have we received from the Syrian rebels for all the non lethal aid we have given them ?

  145. 145
    Wee Jock says:

    Hey Jimmy, who’re you staring at?

  146. 146
    Aspiration Nation says:


  147. 147
    Loopy Lou says:

    All the more reason for resigning.

    Emphasises the utter contempt this Minister has for the people.

  148. 148
    Sir William Wade says:

    Employer’s NI keeps going up, while CT keeps going down. Bad news for employers and those who make goods or provide services. Good news for spivs who just turn a buck somehow.

  149. 149
    Fed Up says:

    More dodgy home loans to people who can’t afford them, to buy a house costing more that they’re worth. Genius.. worked well in the US didn’t it?

  150. 150
    George Osborne says:

    I like propping up the totally overpriced housing market.

    Get your subprime mortgages here!

  151. 151
    Casual Observer says:

    Manipulating the housing market by government assisting with mortgage deposits is bad economics. All this is going to do is delay the housing market correction.

  152. 152
    LB says:

    Why’s it so important.

    Just push it onto a website and we can all get it at the same time.

  153. 153
    Listener says:

    Help to buy sounds interesting.

  154. 154
    A Pedestrian says:

    Fuel duty frozen. What about a show leather subsidy?

  155. 155
    Casual Observer says:

    The hypothetical 13p decrease will likely be covered by further increases in oil price. They know this is coming which is why they cannot apply the tax.

  156. 156
    Lost in Clacton says:


    Not a word has he said about beef burgers.

  157. 157
    Pope Francis II says:

    If that was a leak I’m Pope Francis II. It t’was a well orchestrated PR stunt.

  158. 158
    Fed Up says:

    Not if it drives the prices up.. the monthly payments will also increase.

  159. 159
    Gawd Help Us says:

    Don’t spend your pennies all at once chaps.

  160. 160
    Eric Joyce says:

    You lookin’ at me?

  161. 161
    Barclay Bruvvers says:

    Later today we shall be declaring UDI for the new state of Barclay, this was the island fomerly known as Sark, as a sovereign state, we shall be paying taxes to nobody.

    Hope that clears up any misunderstanding you have with “tax avoidance”

    Yours upwardly.

  162. 162
    A plane full of flying euros says:

    NINJY’s are back!

  163. 163
    Execute Every Last Mother Fucking One of Them says:

    ‘Growth’ of what? These twats have passed off PPI vampire business as ‘growth’ so that was PPI that the banks miss-sold (pinched) you and then getting your money back some arse wants to take a chunk of the stolen money off you, and that’s an example of their ‘growth’!? FFS!
    Meanwhile Johnny Chink is building an Empire on manufacturing, securing global resources, and preparing to kick the Yanks out of his local neighborhood. Never mind leaking the budget this load of clowns need to pack it in and f_ck off.

  164. 164
    Welsh activist. says:

    To be fair to Osbourne, this hasn’t been the car crash i was expecting.

  165. 165
    fruitcake says:

    Is that right you can’t hold your drink braveheart?

  166. 166
    Do I look Daft? says:

    10k tax free limit but fiscal drag on the upper limits means you’ll pay the same

  167. 167
    Execute Every Last Mother Fucking One of Them says:

    What you think f_ck all. If they couldn’t get the bins emptied once a week he’s no chance of getting hold of the local authority cash. As the quangos I think you’ll find they are being used in their traditional role of ‘looking after one’s friends’. Twats and Liars the lot.

  168. 168
    Do I look Daft? says:

    Stop pi$$ing money up the wall you nonce!

  169. 169
    Shergar says:

    What has he to say about deleveraging UK debt?

  170. 170
    Hannibal from Carthage says:


  171. 171
    Moby Dick says:

    check the small print

  172. 172
    Anonymous says:

    Just looking at Cameron, Alexander and Cleggy’s faces, they think Gideon is wonderful, they are taking 1p off a pint,…. that will placate the working classes, they will be able to afford a pint, sod everything else, jobs, homes fuel and food,all we ever wanted was to be able to buy more beer

  173. 173
    Welsh activist. says:

    Hugh’s turn.

  174. 174
    ToeNails says:

    The leak was bad because the BBC didn’t get it first!

  175. 175
    Hacked Off and the CP Ministry of Truth says:

    We’ll seize all of Lebedev’s assets and Sarah Sands shall be taken to Tyburn and hung by the neck until she is dead.

    Oh hang on- Lebedev helped fund Hacked Off so we’ll make him head of the Ministry of Truth forever.

  176. 176
    Hannibal from Carthage says:

    Do you drive on the left?

  177. 177
    Gonk III says:

    D’you think so ? I’m not so sure.

  178. 178
    Welsh activist. says:

    Divine Brown, down.

  179. 179
    MillyTwit says:

    Get DOWN Grommit

  180. 180
    Ed Balls says:

    Why is the Milibiscuit going to reply? have i been sacked?

  181. 181
    Bless their pointy little heads says:

    Oil price set in $, £ is plummeting against the dollar because of QE so any stop on fuel escalator will be pretty irrelevant as regards what you pay at the pump, the only way is up.

  182. 182
    Anonymous says:

    So he claims this is a budget to support those that ‘work hard’.

    I work hard. But that doesn’t count for anything if you’re a public sector worker apparently in Gideon’s eyes.

    Only 2 more years till his smirking face is in the shadows

  183. 183
    Execute Every Last Mother Fucking One of Them says:

    No and you’re dead right, they must have already for the spread sheet ready for our bank ‘levy’ that twat Cameron will roll over and take the German sausage up the arse the useless puff.

  184. 184
    Grommit says:

    Pointy finger! Where’s my powerpoint presentation?

  185. 185
    P l e b says:

    Already blaming Europe for his own mistakes. This man is an incompetent fool.

  186. 186
    Berk Ow Body Double says:

    By Heck, will you shut it slaags!

  187. 187
    Whiskas says:

    I have never seen a public sector working work hard. Do you do that when you are fiddlign your expenses and allowances?

  188. 188
    stumblingblock says:

    Dear Mr. Osborne, have you ever thought of changing your job and writing fairy stories for children, oh. silly me you are already writing fairy stories for the people of the U.K whom you consider childlike, and with the I.Q of a gnat. Pull the other one, we all know Pinocchio’s nose grew when he told porky pies, better check in the mirror, as your budget statistics that I am listening to at the moment are just Tory delusional propaganda., the rich come first, the rest of us can go to hell for all you care

  189. 189
    Realist says:

    0.6% ‘growth’ after inflation is a recession in plainspeak.

  190. 190
    Hugh Grant says:

    the budget must have been PHONE HACKED!!!! I am so HACKED OFF!

  191. 191
    Ned Rose says:

    Osborne says he’s going to stop people advising folk how to avoid tax. So I suppose he’s going to close down Barclays Bank for a start?

  192. 192
    Moby Dick says:

    EDs best roasting since Sunday

  193. 193
    Ed Miliwonk says:


  194. 194
    Quartus says:

    What’s to be expected from a Chancellor without any qualifications in economics?
    (he got a 2:1 in History from Magdalen College, Oxford).

  195. 195
    Anonymous says:

    You are not on my side Osborne.

    I saved up and have got what I need to buy a house. Just a small two bedroom one.

    Now he has caused a jump in house prices that will take me out of the game again.

    UNLESS I take part in their scheme. Which will essentially put me in a bigger chance of negative equity. It only works if the prices will go up, long term.

    OK subsidise a house industry, but do not distort the free market.

    However I could look at an old house, but now we can have a bigger mortgage with their guarantee. Again causing a unnatural jump in house prices. But so can all those that can not manage their finances and have not saved.

    Now I really hate this government.

  196. 196
    P l e b says:

    The excuse this time: The downturn in Europe, which was obviously completely unexpected considering it’s only been happening for the last several years.

  197. 197
    Real world says:

    1p off a pint. Like fuck. Pubs round beer prices to the nearest 10p.

  198. 198
    Labour=Waste says:

    You don’t need a fancy degree to know the government is spending and wasting too much.

  199. 199
    Gotcha! says:

    You’re working so hard… you can post messages on here!


  200. 200
    Hard Working Singleton says:

    Probably “busy” leaking documents or a pissing competition to waste money.

    And he or she works so hard they can join others to post messages in the internet during working hours.

    They’re probably a teacher because more than any public sector shirkers, teachers love to whinge.

  201. 201
    Another Engineer says:

    Given what the LSE turns out, I think having no exposure to economists is probably a good thing.

  202. 202
    Matilda says:

    Doo yoo mean shoo?

  203. 203
    Matilda says:

    Yes, but it will be considerably less up per bucketful than it might otherwise have been – so that is some small relief! At least Georgie is trying.

  204. 204
    The Three Spinners says:

    It’s Brown, Balls and Millibland who were the Brothers Grimm.

  205. 205
    Common Purpose charidees says:

    We don’t need any advice on how to avoid paying tax.
    We’re masters at it.

  206. 206
    Matilda says:

    You obviously were not listening to what he said – which was that if he had not cancelled the escalator with immediate effect the price would have gone up by another 3p a pint. So you thirsty lot have in fact made a 4p saving per pint. So stop bloody whinging.

  207. 207
    Matilda says:

    Good question! Obviously they don’t trust after the omnishambles he made last time out.

  208. 208
    Joyce Piss-head says:

    Drinks prices don’t affect me. The taxpayer subsidises my boozing and I get the punch-ups thrown in for nothing! Who wants some? Come on you plebs.

  209. 209
    Matilda says:

    *trust him

  210. 210
    Catty Comment (Ms) says:

    You appear to forget that your salary comes from the pockets of those who actually produce things people want to buy. Kindly get back in the box and get those paper clips counted accurately.

  211. 211
    Owen Jones says:

    I don’t have an economics degree but it doesn’t stop me being an expert on economics.

  212. 212
    Catty Comment (Ms) says:

    Why did Milipede raise the loss of the AAA rating when just about every country in the world has suffered a recent downgrade by the spivs and crooks of the ratings agencies (two of which are currently on trial in America for their dodgy practices).

  213. 213
    Hannibal from Carthage says:

    I think you must be daft because you have forgotten already the VAT increase Cameron and his mates have brought in .

  214. 214
    Yesterday`s forgotten greek geekess Cushy Open Prison Vasilicki Moussaka Olive Basher says:

    CP members, the lot of `em. B@st@rds.

  215. 215
    Yesterday`s forgotten greek geekess Cushy Open Prison Vasilicki Moussaka Olive Basher says:

    Earl Grey or Polonium, D.I?

  216. 216
    Yesterday`s forgotten greek geekess Cushy Open Prison Vasilicki Moussaka Olive Basher says:

    Cup of tea Mr L? Earl Grey or polonium? To the tower with him.

  217. 217
    Yesterday`s forgotten greek geekess Cushy Open Prison Vasilicki Moussaka Olive Basher says:

    GB, wot Mcmental or do u mean UK, innit.

  218. 218
    sick of em says:

    And leveson says ……. oops, oh fuck, shit

  219. 219
    sick of em says:

    can we have that in semiphore please

  220. 220
    Yesterday`s forgotten greek geekess Cushy Open Prison Vasilicki Moussaka Olive Basher says:

    So 1p off a £5 pint, is that right? Or £2 in HoC bars. So depending upon your status and assumed pleb, that`s sup 500 pints to get one free. You`re having a laff, Osbuerk you PC git.

  221. 221
    balls puncher says:

    balls doesn’t respond but you knew that didn’t you – and if not why not twat

  222. 222
    balls puncher says:

    And exactly how many jobs is this going to produce? One/Two/none?????

  223. 223
    Eric the Terrible Scot says:

    All my pints are free if you want to stay unmarked, you sassenach softies.

  224. 224
    balls puncher says:

    because it’s funny

  225. 225
    Eric the Terrible Scot says:

    come on then, wimp, if yer ard enuff.

  226. 226
    Eric the Terrible Scot says:

    The trick is to ensure the Govt`s big big friends, nudge, wink, get to sell lots of overpriced hutches with you the taxpayer subsidising the game. Free market, innit.

  227. 227
    Anonymous says:

    It’s in HP on the Parliament Channel.

  228. 228
    Things can only got Better. says:

    So will tomorrows Front Page apology look like tonight’s Front Page?

  229. 229
    Evening All says:

    We apologise for putting the Budget apology in the Obituaries.
    It should have read: he died with a Bible in his hand.
    Not: he died with a Bottle in his hand.

  230. 230
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    ” …the individual who Tweeted the page has been suspended … ”

    Who would that be then …Gidders ??

  231. 231
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    Phil Mitchell says :

    Oi Jock boy … ooooo yoooooo clockin’

    (thats hah yah saayy it dahn in the propahh East End )

  232. 232
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    Is it C–t Tribbing ??

  233. 233
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    Did you spell “cut” correctly ?

  234. 234
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:


    Or to be more precise

    “C130 GIDEON “

  235. 235
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:


  236. 236
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    Yeah but we re not members of Schengen so can t we just deport them all back to the nearest EU entry point .

    Mind you 300,000 plane tickets back to Griechenland …. that ll knock another “Chunky ” sized hole in the Public Sector Borrowing whatsit .

    Second thoughts may as well keep them all here and hope some of them actually get a proper job and pay tax — NOT.

  237. 237
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    Gaitskill ??

  238. 238
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    Are you Sprogging for Benefits now ??

    Last week you were Scouting for Boys .

  239. 239
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    After last night Sphericals has developed a virulent form of rugmunchers laryngitis so he cannot speak . Worry not — he s visiting the colorectal surgeon as we speak which should sort his throat out.

  240. 240
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    What — as in Noel ??

  241. 241
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    Jockie from the Ockey says :

    Less o’ the Glass Cow University Jimmy.

    Or ah’ll be seein youus on a Saturday night in Sauchiehall Street after my fifteen pints of the draught single malt .

  242. 242
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    What a “Glasgae ” kiss ??

  243. 243
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    John Maynard Keynes says:

    OK then I will .

    In the long run we are all dead .

  244. 244
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    No … possibly Tracey’s shoe allowance.

  245. 245
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    Some bloke who edits the midday edition of the Standard when he ‘s not running his own construction company — allegedly.

  246. 246

    I really am as thick as I look and not the “nice man” the BBC fucktards make me out to be! though I do have letters after my name-a fuckin’ bag full!

  247. 247
    Anonymous says:

    Excellent Point. But no-one else has noticed so we are all doomed I tell ye

  248. 248
    Enoch says:

    “An investigation is immediately underway into how this front page was made public and the individual who Tweeted the page has been suspended while this takes place. We have immediately reviewed our procedures. We are devastated that an embargo was breached and offer our heartfelt apologies.”

    She has an English-sounding name, but what language is this?
    Send her down to my local pub and let her speak plain English.
    None of us have a feckin’ clue what she’s on about.
    I did warn youse a few years back…..

  249. 249
    We're all in uk together says:

    If the economy grows by 1.8% and the population grows by 1.9%, then we’re poorer on average anyway.

Seen Elsewhere

Users of Gay Hook-Up App Grindr Infected | TechnoGuido
ISIS Raising Funds Online Using Bitcoin | TechnoGuido
UKIP’s Youth Challenge | BBC
ISIS Operative: This Is How We Send Jihadis To Europe | BuzzFeed
Shapps Defends Bashir Defection | Seb Payne
Tory Leadership Contenders Jostle Over Europe | Alex Wickham
Cutting Taxes is Good For You | Art Laffer
Suspects Will Now Have to Prove Innocence | Laura Perrins
Labour Cllr: Cops Shouldn’t Stop Petrol Thieves | HandF Forum
Creeping Cultural Acceptance of Anti-Semitism | Eric Pickles
Time For Greece to Leave Eurozone | Allister Heath

Rising Stars
Find out more about PLMR AD-MS

Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”

Tip off Guido
Web Guido's Archives

Subscribe me to:


AddThis Feed Button

Guido Reads

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,717 other followers