February 13th, 2013

PMQs LIVE: Guido Fawkes Edition


147 Comments

  1. 1
    Dick Scratcha says:

    Morning window suckers!

  2. 2
    Casual Observer says:

    Session extended – Dave Jeered.

    Why Bedroom tax and not Bedroom license ?

  3. 3
    Casual Oserver says:

    Mornin

  4. 4
    Kebabs broken F5 key says:

    Third

  5. 5
    Dick Scratcha says:

    “House meat scandal” ? What? £1.05 for a full english?

  6. 6
    The NHS under Labour says:

    I hope a Tory MP asks a pointed question about where the responsibility for Stafford lies. Labour have been ducking this disgracefully.

  7. 7
    Casual Observer says:

    If the meat industry that successful, why were they selling horse has beef wholesale ?

  8. 8
    Labour Response To Awkward Question on NHS says:

    It’s a hospital bed tax innit ?

  9. 9
    Dick Scratcha says:

    Eurobollocks. £0.80/lb. Sold in pairs.

  10. 10
    Casual Observer says:

    Why not ban EU imports. That is where the problem is.

  11. 11
    Casual Observer says:

    Wanna be in my gang, my gang, my gang etc

  12. 12
    Roundell says:

    hear we go milliband up on living standards

  13. 13
    .243 Win says:

    Millibolocks. Free at point of issue.

  14. 14
    Roundell says:

    simple question, simple lad

  15. 15
    Dick Scratcha says:

    Even Tory members are vastly against the 50 to 45% tax cut.

    Gideon’s a fucking idiot.

  16. 16
    Huhne for Prison says:

    What would Labour do? Continue cuts or add to the deficit by “going for growth”. He might tell us I think-he`s had long enough in the job.

  17. 17
    The NHS under Labour says:

    No questions on Stafford, Ed?

    1200 dead, Ed?

    Labour in power during 2005-08 when the 1200 died, Ed?

    Nothing to say, Ed?

  18. 18
    Dick Scratcha says:

    OBR = useless. Close it down & save some money.

  19. 19
    Roundell says:

    where is gromit?

  20. 20
    Dick Scratcha says:

    “Clean up our banks” Eh? What have you actually done Cam?

  21. 21
    Edwin says:

    Why did milittwat say the deficit was going up? Debt is going up but deficit is down.

  22. 22
    Tuscan Tony says:

    In fairness to Davey he’s still putting out the inferno left behind by the Two Eds. It’s not surprising the water levels in the fire engines are a little low.

  23. 23
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Tractor stats, tractor stats Dave.

  24. 24
    Casual Observer says:

    Haven’t seen Andy Burnham yet.

  25. 25
    The NHS under Labour says:

    I see Chucky’s on the shadow front bench. Which face is he wearing today? His anti-corporation face, or his embracing the city face? His anti-arms industry face, or his Labour fringe speech sponsored by an arms manufacturer face? His man of the people in jeans and sweater face, or his changed from a £1000 suit he was wearing 5 minutes before face?

  26. 26
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Millionaires tax cut, you couldn’t make it up. BINGO.

  27. 27
    Dick Scratcha says:

    Every tax payer will NOT see a tax cut – the basic rate band is being reduced FFS. AND child benefit has been fucked up – marginal rates now 60%+.

    Etonian bone brained toffs.

    Bring back Tebbit.

  28. 28
    The NHS under Labour says:

    Labour’s comments on Stafford:

    Tumbleweeds rolls by.

  29. 29
    Welsh activist. says:

    This pretend animosity between these bloodsuckers is really getting me down.

  30. 30
    Roundell says:

    guido note gets a mention

  31. 31
    Ted says:

    Dave – this is the Government that will have paid down the deficit by 2015 (says nothing about the total debt rising by 60%).
    Disingenuous Etonian bastard.

  32. 32
    The NHS under Labour says:

    “It won’t have any new policies in it”.

    That was a corker!

  33. 33
    Dick Scratcha says:

    Cam is electorally toxic, but Milicock is not landing a punch.

  34. 34
    The NHS under Labour says:

    “The whole front bench opposite is no good”.

    Quote of the Day!

  35. 35
    Tuscan Tony says:

    Davey needs to keep hammering home the point re high tax rates and lower actual revenues.

  36. 36
    Dick Scratcha says:

    WTF is Gove doing? Auditioning to be a Bond villain?

  37. 37
    Steve Miliband says:

    Resolution Foundation release press release on wednesday before PMQ’s

  38. 38
    Welsh activist. says:

    We’re going to look at every single one of our systems, and then we will do f*ck all.

  39. 39
    R Swiper says:

    Even Ed Balls said Cameron on Mili’s “No Policy” speech tomorrow “Good One” and nodded. Read his lips

  40. 40
    Coalition Labelling says:

    May contain nuts and twats

  41. 41
    Staffordshire Ex tory says:

  42. 42
    Casual Observer says:

    Retailers didn’t know either. Stop buying from the EU.

  43. 43
    Dick Scratcha says:

    Claire Perry : “Promote me! Promote me! Do you want a blowie? Can I lick your arse?”

  44. 44
    Fishy says:

    Miliband says the same thing week after week after week after weak

  45. 45
    Dick Scratcha says:

    Anas Sarwar used to be in Porridge.

  46. 46
    Casual Observer says:

    100% Bull : Now that is quite funny.

  47. 47
    Call me Dave says:

    I dont want anybody to pay anything. There will be a healthy insurance market

    So you fucking retarded fuckwit, insurance is free huh?

  48. 48
    Dick Scratcha says:

    PennyPorn.com

  49. 49
    Dick Scratcha says:

    Nearly saw her VW bonnet then.

  50. 50
    Oh for gawds sake... says:

    The EU won’t let us.

  51. 51
    Gawd Help Us says:

    Who shouted out vote UKIP?

  52. 52
    Casual Observer says:

    Good question on Eastleigh. The UKIP candidate is strong on planning legislation. Note the shouts of ‘UKIP’ :-D

  53. 53
    Stan Butler says:

    Someone with sense.

  54. 54
    A serf in the office of Boles. says:

    Everyone has been briefed that there must be no mention of the plans being put in place in the office of Nick Boles for mandatory requisition of accommodation, for immigrants in particular.

    They are targeting single home owning pensioners first and then anyone else as they get the scheme running.

    You will be forced to house a number of immigrants and will have no choice in the matter, think I’m joking, wait and see, I’ve already seen the numbers of Romanians/Bulgarians in particular they are anticipating.

    This follows on from the questionnaire that was sent out eighteen months ago asking for the number of rooms in your house, it was supposed to be anonymous but I can tell you it was not.

  55. 55
    Casual Observer says:

    What did he say? Really?

  56. 56
    Emu says:

    When was Grotbags elected?

  57. 57
    Anonymous says:

    WHo shouted “Vote UKIP” just now?

  58. 58
    Gawd Help Us says:

    You’re wiping their savings out.

  59. 59
    genghiz the kahn says:

    The 50% income tax rate was for a fraction of Brown’s tenure in office. A nice totem to hand the coalition with. Only a fool thinks it raises more revenues.

  60. 60
    The Chingford Skinhead says:

    On yer fuckin bike.

  61. 61
    Casual Observer says:

    Wiping my savings out

  62. 62
    EU Funded Pro EU Troll says:

    Vote UKIP.

  63. 63
    Jim Royal says:

    Big Society – MY ARSE.

  64. 64
    Dick Scratcha says:

    Michael Moore’s head appearing courtesy of Osram.

  65. 65
    Stan Butler says:

    Gove seems to have aged. Must be a tough job.

  66. 66
    Casual Observer says:

    That question on tax avoidance goes directly to pleb gate.

  67. 67
    Dick Scratcha says:

    International tax transparency FFS. Dream, Dream, Dream…

  68. 68
    8illy Scratcha says:

    Does anybody know the point of comments on here

  69. 69
    Dick Scratcha says:

    Regionalade – full of gas & rots your teeth

  70. 70
    Eh? says:

    I could swear I just hear someone shout “VOTE UKIP” just before they were discussing Eastleigh..

    Anyone hear it?

  71. 71
    8illy Scratcha says:

    Hot stuff

  72. 72
    Ted says:

    They are expecting up to 5 million over the coming years but are absolutely refusing to admit this in public.

  73. 73
    Nick Boles says:

    Collect your P45 on the way out Peter.

  74. 74
    8illy Scratcha says:

    Gotta go. Bye all

  75. 75
    Dick Scratcha says:

    Only Cam could get an EU budget reduction, but end up paying more….

    You. couldn’t. make. it. up.

  76. 76
    Ted says:

    Here we go with the crime is falling bullshit.

  77. 77
    .243 Win says:

    Down 10% in his area ? What is he, a walking crimewave ?

  78. 78
    Dick Scratcha says:

    Is Gove a National Theatre Player?

  79. 79
    Gawd Help Us says:

    Ed Balls beginning to look like Prezza.

  80. 80
    Dick Scratcha says:

    Tapsell will be appearing in Findus burgers next week.

  81. 81
    Eh? says:

    You heard it too! HA!

    Excellent, thought I was having a stroke.

    Good advice.

    VOTE UKIP

  82. 82
    Dick Scratcha says:

    …sorry Peter, can you repeat trhe question?

  83. 83
    Palerider says:

    Ed Miliband looked “A whiter shade of pale”,

  84. 84
    Casual Observer says:

    Currency war question finally asked.

  85. 85
    Michael Gove.... camerons nodding dog says:

    Amateur dramatics dear boy. Really.

  86. 86
    Moussa Koussa's pet meerkat says:

    Are the UKIP MPs shouting that?

  87. 87
    Dick Scratcha says:

    Celt count = 6

  88. 88
    Moussa Koussa's pet meerkat says:

    Are the UKIP MPs shouting that?

  89. 89
    Gideon says:

    Hurrah 3 new first time buyers in the last 5 years

  90. 90
    Magaluf Engerlander says:

    Isn’t that the lure that brought Chris Bryant into politics?

  91. 91
    Moussa Koussa's pet meerkat says:

    Are the UKIP MPs shouting that?

  92. 92
    STuN says:

    Hunt Count = 649

  93. 93
    Gawd Help Us says:

    FLS is destroying my savings.

  94. 94
    Welsh activist. says:

    At least Camoron has the decency to look embarrassed.

  95. 95
    Moussa Koussa's pet meerkat says:

    Can we rename this Prime Minister’s Lies?

  96. 96
    The voice of reason says:

    Yes.

  97. 97
    Food Standards Agency says:

    We don’t like to blow our own trumpet, but it is fair to say that we are as good at protecting Britain’s food as the Border Agency is at protecting Britain’s borders.

  98. 98
    Paniagua says:

    Bercow look like he has been sleeping in the huffie room

  99. 99
    Ms Browns boys says:

    Look here, we increased our spend on the medical profession pay and reduced their hours… what more do you expect us to do.

  100. 100
    One Term Dave says:

    When people ask me where I place myself in the list of great Tory PMs, I don’t like to sound immodest but I say I’m a teeny bit better than Ted Heath but nowhere near as good as John Major.

  101. 101
    Paniagua says:

    Only if Labour win in 2015

  102. 102

    But you’ll have to wait until he grows a pair first.

  103. 103
    Ted says:

    Take your savings out of the bank and buy gold sovereigns and Britannia’s.

  104. 104
    Come on Nige give em a good kicking says:

    Why are we asking their permission?

  105. 105

    Reblogged this on maltbyblogger and commented:
    Did anyone spot our Kevin (Barron MP) or Sarah Champion MP ?

  106. 106
    Huhne for Prison says:

    Labour was shouting UKIP as vote for them helps let in another LibDem turd.

  107. 107
    Ted says:

    Thats the most honest thing you’ve ever said you Etonian prick.

  108. 108
    being there says:

    No more boom and bust!

  109. 109
    Martine McCutcheon says:

    Lend us a tenner?

  110. 110
    Graham Swift says:

    Why no question on 1200 dead at Stafford Hospital ? Why no Burnham ? All happened under Liebour.

  111. 111
    Sir William Wade says:

    Quite right. John Major won a general election. He was the last Tory leader to do so.

  112. 112
    Despicable little turd says:

    I note Miliband hadnt the gumption or decency to offer a thought or a word of sympathy to the female PSNI officer killed in the line of duty and being buried this afternoon.

  113. 113
    being there says:

    The NHS has almost as much employees as the Chinese Army, but is much better at killing people.

  114. 114
    A baboon says:

    Really these anthropoids behave frightfully. The noise, my dear! The pant-hooting, grunting, screeching and vulgar gestures!

  115. 115
    pay my rent says:

    Is Nick Boles the lead singer of Pet Shop Boys?

  116. 116
    Anonymous says:

    Good to see Liebour choosing a working class candidate for Eastleigh.

  117. 117

    Very Zen – the sound of no hands clapping?

  118. 118
    The Queen Vic says:

    Get back behind the bar and flash your tits a bit

  119. 119
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    And the other 649 should be doing Porridge.

  120. 120
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    British Jobs for British Workers!

  121. 121
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    +++Applause+++

  122. 122
    Cut-me-own-throat Dibbler says:

    I don’t know why Cameron doesn’t keep ramming it home that it is not a millionaire tax cut but is going to be a 5% millionaire tax rise on what the Labour government had. And more importantly that that suicidal rise is hurting both jobs and growth. How could it not do?

  123. 123
    Yew Fat Tuat says:

    You would not need to ban them. Simply introduce on-the-spot testing at ports, which would a) make the importation of mis-declared products pointless and b) cost time and money, which would make the importation of cheap crap declared as meat equally unattractive.

  124. 124
    Cut-me-own-throat Dibbler says:

    And every taxpayer will NOT see a fall in living standards. Ed Militwit forgot to mention that.

  125. 125
    Cut-me-own-throat Dibbler says:

    As did the bank fiasco. As did 110% mortgages. As did the horsemeat fiasco which Labout stopped the FSA testing for. As did the MP expenses fiasco. As did phone hacking,etc, etc , etc.

  126. 126
    Cut-me-own-throat Dibbler says:

    +100

  127. 127
    you need to do much better than call me a little Englander says:

    it wouldn’t be a surprise if this is real not least of which as Nick Boles is an odious little shite straight out of the new Conservative text book.
    Another minister, a home office minisiter I think it was has been asked by 4 separate MP’s recently how many will come from Romania and Bulgaria and his answer was that such questions ‘are not helpful’, wtf, how is that remotely acceptable? If you think the NHS, schools and public services are going down the pan already just fast forward a year and you’ll think this is paradise.

  128. 128
    you need to do much better than call me a little Englander says:

    that’s right. I like that crime is officially falling, makes you wonder how it is that the prisons are full

  129. 129
    GeoffS says:

    Milliband. FAIL …….yet again! Three in a row :(

  130. 130
    Anonymous says:

    Shouldn’t that be ‘full French?’

  131. 131
    Anonymous says:

    public flogging, or would you prefer a 2 minute hate. preferably at the point of a rifle?

  132. 132
    Pure Aw Naw says:

    That wasn’t funny the first 80 times you said it. Are you Rainman?

  133. 133
    Anonymous says:

    Close a few prisons & transfer their inmates to the remaining prisons.
    Result = Prisons are full.

  134. 134
    oddly helpful says:

    Copy what France did for VCR imports: all must go through one designated port and await clearance by the single dedicated -douanier-

    Or does that only work for non-perishable and non-EU imports?

  135. 135
    DWWolds says:

    For 12 years and 11 months of Labour’s tenure in office the top rate of tax was 40%. Even with the proposed reduction it will be 5% more than that at 45%. Thus, if Milliminor argues that the Coalition is giving millionaires £100,000 at 45% surely they gave them double that at 40%. And that went on for almost 13 years.

  136. 136
    Got a new Crayon says:

    Exactly, lets just burn their goods at the docks -it was good enough for the French and British sheep.

  137. 137
    Con Artists says:

    Again the EU does not allow you to test at the ports, this would be unfair and against the free movement of goods.

    You have to rely on the (fraudulently stamped) forms…

    When will you fcuking plebs wake up and realize 70% and rising, of our legislation is set in Brussels by the EU and you have NO CONTROL OVER IT….

    Wake, the fcuk up !

  138. 138
    Con Artists says:

    5% represents a 12.5% increase from 40%…

    Waz u one of dem ijuts from de Academy skoolz init ?

  139. 139
    Con Artists says:

    Alert Alert flat earther…

    Those eejuts haven’t even started scraping at the deficit, and nor will they be able to with uncontrolled access to our welfare, health and benefits..

  140. 140
    Con Artists says:

    CaMoron and Millitwat are like two flacid c0cks fighting over which c0ck won’t have to swallow the viagra.

    They are both a disgrace to this country and the motherland respectively.

  141. 141
    Con Artists says:

    Vote UKIP, get UKIP

  142. 142
    Con Artists says:

    It is 5 million according to the unreleased numbers. I don’t think it will ever be released officially unless someone gets some kahuunas and leaks it, before the by election…

  143. 143
    The savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    Depends who’s giving it and how accomplished she is at the art of fluffing.

    Personally if it was a toss up between eating a full. English and being eaten out. I think the black pudding and gammon crackling would win hands down.

  144. 144
    Anonymous says:

    Quite right. John Major won a general election. He will be the last Tory leader to do so.

    Fixed that for you.

  145. 145
    old SHEP says:

    The Mystery of Edwin Druid (unfinished).

  146. 146
    old SHEP says:

    What happened to the Guido thread about Levesons Royal Charter, have they started already? :-)

  147. 147
    A serf in the office of Boles. says:

    O.K. people, I’ve spent over thirty years dealing with housing and all the periphary issues surrounding it, there are at present two strands of planning going on in the department.

    1. Millions more immigrants are expected to flood in and depending how the polls are going the Coalition will try to limp on until the next election using the elastoplast approach, with ongoing planning for the mandatory requisition of housing if re-elected.

    2. If Labour are then elected a collective sigh of relief from Boles and Pickles but, having talked to some of my Labour contacts, they are intending to bring back rent control of privately owned housing, make it even more difficult than it already is to evict problem tenants (i.e., massive arrears, criminal, antisocial) and they are also forming a plan to requisition housing from owners.

    I may be sacked if they find out my identity but they are not telling you so I will.


Seen Elsewhere

Users of Gay Hook-Up App Grindr Infected | TechnoGuido
ISIS Raising Funds Online Using Bitcoin | TechnoGuido
UKIP’s Youth Challenge | BBC
ISIS Operative: This Is How We Send Jihadis To Europe | BuzzFeed
Shapps Defends Bashir Defection | Seb Payne
Tory Leadership Contenders Jostle Over Europe | Alex Wickham
Cutting Taxes is Good For You | Art Laffer
Suspects Will Now Have to Prove Innocence | Laura Perrins
Labour Cllr: Cops Shouldn’t Stop Petrol Thieves | HandF Forum
Creeping Cultural Acceptance of Anti-Semitism | Eric Pickles
Time For Greece to Leave Eurozone | Allister Heath


Rising Stars
Find out more about PLMR AD-MS


Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”


Tip off Guido
Web Guido's Archives

Subscribe me to:






RSS


AddThis Feed Button
Archive


Labels
Guido Reads
Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,717 other followers