February 11th, 2013

Rich’s Monday Morning View


183 Comments

  1. 1
    Lord bumwatch says:

    All this is knackering!

  2. 2
    genghiz the kahn says:

    May the horse be with you.

  3. 3
    Saddle sores says:

    Neugh. Neigh. Thiuce neigh.

  4. 4
    Damned Impertinent Questions says:

    Nice to see you still pandering to the lowest comm,on denominator. Ah well. Beats having to think dunnit

  5. 5
    Pawn Sandwich says:

    My kingdom for a horse burger.

  6. 6
    Francis Laine says:

    Champion !

  7. 7
    Chris P Pancake says:

    Please accept a full refund, etc., etc.

  8. 8
    Just Another Zek says:

    Never mind that another state regulatory system is proved to be of f_ck all use except for paying fat salaries to a bunch of rissoles! Just rejoice in the freedom of manly love to be expressed in matrimony! Don’t forget we gave you this freedom come GE day 2015.

  9. 9
    Just Another Zek says:

    You can have the calf eye out my soup if you like?

  10. 10
    Erskine May says:

    Hypocrisy and canter.

  11. 11
    Raving Loon says:

    Should they call it “Beef” lasagne from now on?

  12. 12
    Erskine May says:

    Thereby hangs a tail.

  13. 13
    William says:

    Unfortunately, because it appeals to the bread and circus crowd, this story will run and run.

  14. 14
    Joss Taskin says:

    Isn’t that Andrew Lansley ?

  15. 15
    Joss Ayinglike says:

    That ‘cartoon’ is absolute pony.

  16. 16
    The Admiral says:

    I actually feel sorry for Findus. If it weren’t for tesco’s own-brand and the like, there wouldn’t have been this sort of cock-up. If it’s too good to be true, it usually is!

  17. 17
    Erskine May says:

    Chetham’s Library is well worth a visit if you are in the area.

  18. 18
    Fluffy Thoughts says:

    Why no whitty [sic] remark about the failure of EU-regulation of the meat industry…?

    :thinks:

    :awakes:

    Dick-and-Mark’s attempt at satire….

  19. 19
    Erskine May says:

    At least there is nothing fishy going on here.

  20. 20
    Hugh Janus says:

    Why the long face Paterson? (or Lansley)

  21. 21
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Mr Ed…

    Miliband

  22. 22
    Martin Day says:

    If only this was a caption contest.

    He could well be saying”That other Owen,Owen Jones was in bed with me a moment ago,where the heck is he?”

  23. 23
    Alex Salmond says:

    There is nae government failure here Jimmy.

  24. 24
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    What The Fuck ?

  25. 25
    D'Jango says:

    I hear they’ve found sea horse in fish fingers!!!

  26. 26
    HRH Richard 3rd says:

    Lasagne, lasagne, my kingdom for a lasagne!

  27. 27
    Paniagua says:

    I would recommend that Rich should not give up his day job.

  28. 28
    Julian Lasagne says:

    I’m tired of brought-in Gregg’s sarnies. I could eat a horse!

  29. 29
    Meat Out Justice says:

    Findus are pirates who gave not a money’s about the provenance of their products until they were caught. The entire board of directors should be under arrest.

  30. 30
    Statements of Fact says:

    This horsemeat scandal bollux is a really useful distraction from Dave’s economic failures and gay marriage fiasco.

    It’s all a lot of Government and media hype. The public should realise that people have eaten horse for centuries. It’s a lot better than all the colourings, flavourings, and other shit that’s in processed food.

    The greedy obese fuckers want this cheap crap food so that they can spend more of their bennies on fags, lager, dispoasable sofas and telly subscrips.

  31. 31
    Owin Jones says:

    The disappearance of £8 million payment promised to support sacked #Remploy workers… http://bit.ly/XBfYxF

  32. 32
    Ed Miliband (Prime Minister designate) says:

    Hear ! Hear !

  33. 33
    Erskine May says:

    Good morning, sir. I trust you are well today.

    Just as one has to change one’s underclothes once a day, I am having to change my identity with the same frequency. Not a sombrero day here I regret…

  34. 34
    Anonymous says:

    There are more failures to emerge. Some have paid the ultimate price because of the ignorance of those that are paid to protect us.

    Best example is when the government asked the regulator if everything was OK. They confirmed everything was fine. However, it was asked of the same regulator that was the cause of the failure, and the staff had admitted that they had no idea about the regulations. It will all emerge fully as the public excepts that they have no protection.

  35. 35
    Hilarity Cliton says:

    When we’re finished with you you’ll be eating your teeth…

  36. 36
    Fraudsters Need Apologists Like You says:

    People who eat horse knowing it to be horse should be free to do so. People should not be free to sell horse, espcially uninspected horse, and claim it is beef.

    Still, you are entitled to your view. Why not come round to my restaurant and have a glass or two of Morrocan Chateau Margaux to go with this excellent Macedonian stilton?

  37. 37
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Owen Paterson who fucked off home for the weekend and had to be dragged back to Westminster
    just to tell food retailers to “Test your own products”So we have a highly paid FSA that don’t test and have never tested meat to see what is in it , except bacterior , and a goverment minister who didn’t think it was serious enough to interupt his weekend and a lying government who put out a statement saying he was in London holding meetings and was “on top of it” I don’t know who he was on top of but he was not in London he was at home

  38. 38
    Erskine May says:

    The assumption which is built into your statement may not be the case.

  39. 39
    Paniagua says:

    No he really is that good.

  40. 40
    Erskine May says:

    I put you to proof! :-)

  41. 41
    Paniagua says:

    That is the first time I have seen an article in the Morning Star that contains the word Pot without Pol and hero

  42. 42
    The Pantry says:

    Agreed. I think we can safely sack the incompetant minister. And also replace the people who ‘work’ at the FSA with people willing to get off their backsides and protect the public instead of the food manufacturers and supermarkets.

  43. 43
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Just shows that those on Dave’s Gravy train are only along for the ride

  44. 44
    Anonymous says:

    Look at how far this meat traveled. It probably exceeded the consumers holiday travel distance.

    It is again an issue of trading. The product is not important anymore. As long as they can do the deals and move it from company to company they are OK. The more it is moved the less likely anyone will ever track its origin. Each company in the chain could have conceivable “watered” down the product. I just wonder what else was in it?

    Does sound somewhat familiar to the toxic debt trading. After so many owners no one knew what it really was. But at any time, any one of the companies could have tested the product.

    In the end both were unloaded onto the public, once past their useful trading life.

  45. 45
    Cut-me-own-throat Dibbler says:

    Wot’s wrong wi a bit o orse?

  46. 46
    M. Ollond says:

    Just think of us poor French – all our horse meat is contaminated with ze rosbif

  47. 47
    Joyce Thacker says:

    And the NHS mass killings are quietly forgotten . Burnham/heydrich wrote an article in the guardian yesterday saying something and nothing – I never got to the end but assume ‘lessons must be learned ‘

  48. 48
    How gullible are the British public? says:

    We thought we’d test the idea of compulsory Halal meat on you first and you seemed ok with that so we took it a stage further thats all.

  49. 49
    Cwis Bwiant says:

    What about me the pork sword I had this weekend wasn’t 100% sword

  50. 50
    Paniagua says:

    Beef Gravy, or Horse?

  51. 51
    Gordon's brown eye says:

    It was better when Ed M took his inspiration from Wallace and Gromit and not that Daisy Cameron and that todger Cleggito

  52. 52
  53. 53
    Phil says:

    Guess whose guidelines the regulatory bodies have been following for the past decade. Rich would have been more accurate by pinning a red rosette to that lasagne.
    My advice to Cameron is scrap every fxxxing quango left by the last lot and start again.

  54. 54
    The Pantry says:

    The big joke is that probably very little of the food marked halal probably is.

  55. 55
    Dave the Weak says:

    Quite right. The food industry must meet the high standards of truth achieved by my Government and that of my Labour predecessors, notably Saint Tony.

  56. 56
    Gordon's brown eye says:

    You mean Macedonian stallion

  57. 57
    Owen Jones (Guest Moderator) says:

    Prime Minister David Cameron’s comment regarding same sex marriage is under review.

    His comment is littered with expletives.

  58. 58
    Minister for Bullshit says:

    I assure that the food in this country is safe. We have no idea what’s in it but it’s safe. Well it might be full of dog meat, powdered glass and anthrax, but it is safe.

    Look to prove it’s safe I willl feed it to Selwyn Gummer. You cant say fairer than that!

  59. 59
    Taxfodder says:

    nothing providing its called horse and not beef, and priced accordingly…

  60. 60
    Predatory Capitalism says:

    Findus were bought out by private equity sharks

  61. 61
    albacore says:

    About all that Paterson can manage to bleat
    Is the E U won’t let us ban imported meat
    Sod ill effects on the British population
    Ne’er mind, at the current rate of immigration
    There’ll be more beef in iffy imported horsemeat
    Than British left in Blighty to gorge on the treat

  62. 62
    Taxfodder says:

    Fine then call it horse, and price it accordingly…

  63. 63
    Centre Parting says:

    Can we Christians sue over being given halal meat? I’m sure the lawyers are already working on the mooslim prisoners being given pork.

  64. 64
    ho hum says:

    Food Standards Agency cost more than £160,000,000 and there is horse in my crispy pancakes – what the fuck is going on

    Some fucker somewhere needs to take some responsibility

    Fat fucker Stephen Hester is getting a multi million pound bonus for fucking things up – I am in some parallel universe

  65. 65
    Nogbad the Bad says:

    That it’s horse is not the problem. Horses are medicated with all kinds of chemicals that cattle and sheep are not. Mares are given hormones to stop them coming into season so they can race, colts are given other hormones to stop them trying to mate with said mares while racing. Older horses are given pain killers so they can carry on working/racing. One type of painkiller, known as bute, causes loss of bone density in humans.
    Also mares urine is harvested for the production of HRT for women of a certain age. It would come as no surprise that the mares were medicated to produce as much hormone as possible.
    If you want safe meat, look for the “red tractor” logo, or buy it from a butcher you trust.

  66. 66
    Synic says:

    Support the British farming industry which has to operate to higher standards.

    Don’t buy this cheap foreign crap, with all it’s associated travel pollution costs.

  67. 67
    I'm new here. says:

    Is there horse in Fox’s glacier mints? Besides the fox content,I mean….

  68. 68
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    It does neigh matter

  69. 69
    Camoron Cnut says:

    Good-o. The story is running and running. My continuing fuck-ups are below the radar.

    Toodle Pippa

  70. 70
    The Public says:

    Dear Minister for Bullshit,

    It was great to see you having your big moment on telly. I bet everyone who has ever heard of you was very proud. I don’t expect we will hear from you again, so I’d just like to say what a marvellous thing it is to see someone reach the pinacle of their career. The Job Centre is that way.

    The Public

  71. 71
    Sofa King Fast says:

    No, it’s Robert Kilroy-Silk

  72. 72
    A Multinational Confectioner says:

    There is no horse meat in Whithers Originals.

  73. 73
    Fresh Grace Please says:

    I often specify that no-one must have prayed over my food before I am served it.

  74. 74
    Humphrey Lyttelton says:

    We couldn’t ask for a better cartoonist

  75. 75
    Back in the EUSSR says:

    If you had any doubts we’re not in charge of our own destiny, I think this answers that one.

  76. 76
    Anonymous says:

    in the world of trouble and strife the gentle cow of times past has lost its sanctity.
    .
    snakes everwhere but fear not…feed the Cobra the milk of duty for then he purrs. In our ethics free world, this works.
    .
    God bless. the sun god..who is worshipped on monday but not according to the black is white language that is english by design.
    .
    all communication works on the visible mind and the invisible mind of the subconscious our vibrational self. when one is pure and the other impure the impure wins out as it operates deeper.
    .
    know thy subconscious self and how it gets used…every day and every minute. The might who run the world have the ancient technology…get this science of the self before it disappears from the global consciousness…step by step….grain of sand at a time.
    . Have a lovely week.

  77. 77
    Yvonne from The Colliers Arms Clydach says:

    That Owen Patterson character is not up to the job I tell you .

    Bring back that Liam Fox .

    At least he is a doctor.

  78. 78
    Alex Salmond says:

    Fucking Supine Agency I and II – fucked up the Banks and Food Standards.

    Quality Care Commission – fucked over over Stafford Hospital and was headed by Hunt who was at Stafford Hospital Trust.

  79. 79
    Sally Bercowitz says:

    It’s making my eyes dilate just thinking about it.

  80. 80
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Bought out by private equine group.

  81. 81
    Adam Werritty says:

    Patterson out Fox in !

    Get it done by 5.00PM !

  82. 82
    Urban idiots says:

    We must exterminate the city foxes, but of course keep the ban on country fox hunting.

  83. 83
    Diane Abbott says:

    Is there any sugar in those Lasagnes ?

  84. 84
    Bluebottle says:

    Feed them porridge.

  85. 85
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Disgusting , horsemeat in burgers what is the world coming to /
    in future i will stick with only traditional French food like
    Snails , frogs legs door mice , sparrows and cow brains and hideously infected deformed Goose livers

    Bon appetit

    give me horse meat anyday !

  86. 86
    D'Jango says:

    So is the carton that says “beef”!

  87. 87
    John Gummer says:

    Did someone mention cheeseburgers?

  88. 88
    The beast of Oldland Common says:

    We must keep our doors shut at all times.

  89. 89
    Owin Jones says:

    As the Conservative cookie crumbles http://bit.ly/11veE63

  90. 90
    Frederick says:

    From the Grauniad (so you do not have to go there)

    A tale reaches Monkey about disgraced former cabinet minister Chris Huhne’s journalism years. When Huhne was on a traineeship at the Liverpool Daily Echo, he was told by no-nonsense news editor Alan Hudson to go to Birkenhead to talk to a man who had found something at the bottom of his garden. Huhne replied: “Don’t you know I’ve got a starred First from Oxford in PPE?” Hudson looked at him, then, deliberately mishearing, asked for quiet in the newsroom and announced: “This new fellow has just told me he’s got a First from Oxford in PE … so he’s going to do 20 press-us to show us what he can do.” Wearing a heavy suit, Huhne reluctantly dropped to the floor. Struggling for breath, he stopped at six. And then went to Birkenhead. Presumably driving at a sensible speed.

  91. 91
    Back in the EUSSR says:

    Eat my cock Frankie you cuпt! The whole point is that the whole public service charade is deceiving the public in their usual despicable, underhand ways.

  92. 92
    Lost in Clacton says:

    No but there is plenty of Lasagne in my coffee this morning .

  93. 93
    A cheeky scouser says:

    Mind your car for a tenner mister

  94. 94
    Chopper 'arris says:

    I thought Alan Hudson used to play for Chelsea!

  95. 95
    David Wisteria says:

    I have already blocked my back passage.

  96. 96
    Red Rum's gone to Iceland says:

    I don’t know if there was any horse in that lasagne I’ve just eaten, but it’s certainly given me the trots

  97. 97
    SPaD U Like says:

    We are issuing an emergency notification.

    Many of our SPaDs that have been tested have been found to contain traces of Minister

  98. 98
    Phil from Pentonville says:

    No you are mixing up Chesea with Stoke City mate.

  99. 99
    Liverpool Airport says:

    A odd looking car triggered a major security incident at Liverpool Airport earlier today.

    The vehicle was taxed, had its radio intact and had a full set of hub caps.

  100. 100
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    If you had a cock it would be a rancid scabby thing not be fit for human consumption you fucking peado nutter

  101. 101
    Hand the Cat says:

    There is too many horse meat comments that about four on thr trot

  102. 102
    Andrew Mitchell MP says:

    No I never !

  103. 103
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Good morning sir
    i see that Broadmoor has released the fucking stalking nutcase again

  104. 104
    Red Rum's gone to Iceland says:

    Don’t you mean Shergar?

  105. 105
    Anonymous says:

    given that the political class is being killed off…why dance on the corpse?

  106. 106
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    it’s certainly “little acorn” weather here too

  107. 107
    Back in the EUSSR says:

    You should be so lucky, bitch.

  108. 108
    T'Old Fella says:

    One little problem there, would Big Dave know where to start ?

  109. 109
    Centre Parting says:

    So was harold Shipman.

  110. 110
    Mr Rotivator says:

    I had some lasagne yesterday – still got a bit in my teeth

  111. 111
    albacore says:

    Just shut your gob. You can’t say things like that
    Open that bag and out will spring the cat
    Parliament kow-tows to immigrants’ wishes
    On what is allowed in national dishes

  112. 112
    A right royal f*ck up says:

    .. and not full of drugs that are harmful to people.

    .. and mixed in with other Romanian ‘filler’ – ie bits of badger, fox, dog, roadkill such as that.

  113. 113
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    WARNING !
    Processed meals may contain traces of meat !

  114. 114
    I don't no need no edukashun says:

    That was the main ingredient for Soylent Green, if I remember rightly.

  115. 115
    Sally Bercow says:

    I thought I’d bought a cucumber yesterday…turned out to be a horse’s cock!

  116. 116
    T'Old Fella says:

    We we have been down this food sourcing problem before, anyone remember mad cow disease, by the way what has happened to that?

  117. 117
    Reynard the foxy one says:

    Listen if you want us foxes to stop nicking food and breaking into your houses all you have to do is have the HoC pass a bill to feed us, Watson and Abbot would keep us fed for a year

  118. 118
    Mr Slater says:

    If you tolerate this, then your Psittacenes could be next! Squawky á la orange premium gourmand range – no thank you!

  119. 119
    Sir William Gilbert says:

    Well, hardly ever!

  120. 120
    Joyce Thacker says:

    It’s hard to know what is British . Don’t they label it so if it was packaged here ?

  121. 121
    One-term Dave, dragging the Tories to their grave, says:

    Oh gosh! I’m far too busy busy busy! Busy giving your money to Iceland and India! Busy spending £2billion on windfarms in Africa! Busy busy busy legalising gay marriage! Busy busy busy giving £53million to the EU every day (soon to go up by half a billion pounds a year – terrific negotiating on my part, eh, what what!) Busy borrowing £33billion and wasting it on a rubbish railway no one wants or needs! Busy planning for the arrival of 400,000 Romanian parasites next year (EU membership is so vital to our country, what what!) Busy destroying the armed forces, busy breaking every promise I ever made! Busy doubling Britain’s debt.

    Far too busy to run the country properly, I can tell you!

    Tally ho!

  122. 122
    T'Old Fella says:

    Never mind Alex, you will be able to do it yourself and do everything right in your independent country, Scotchland.

  123. 123
    Fed up taxpayer says:

    Whose in charge at the Food Standards Agency another Liebour waste of space Lord most high Baron Rooker says it all.

  124. 124
    Perse O'Nally says:

    You got a beef with him?

  125. 125
    Hand the Cat says:

    Lessons will be learnt we were told, appears to have fell on deaf ears

  126. 126
    T'Old Fella says:

    Tell them to stop horsing about then

  127. 127
    gaddaffi's chauffeur says:

    Did you try to eat it ?

  128. 128
    Is he sleeping with the fishes? says:

    What happened to Mark?

  129. 129
    Peter Mangledbum says:

    Hmmmmmmm I like a bit of meat inside me.

  130. 130
    FOX News says:

    It’s us they’re really after, not the bushy-tailed critters.

  131. 131
    T'Old Fella says:

    More speed, less hast

  132. 132
    Stan says:

    You can lead a horse to water but a pencil must be lead.

  133. 133
    Findus Advert says:

  134. 134
    Gonk III says:

    No, Ice !

  135. 135
    Knowall says:

    Played for both

  136. 136
    Miss Marple says:

    Mark Andíich. Rich and Mark. Geddit?

  137. 137
    T'Old Fella says:

    I think a lot of of people will be running.

  138. 138
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Rich is a no-Mark anyway and always was, but it only now comes out…

  139. 139
    Miss Marple says:

    Sorry, that should be “An/dr/ích”; my attempts to get the name past the f*cking m/ód/bó/t went a bit wrong.

    (Four attempts to post this message – what is up with this fucking blog??)

  140. 140
    Hand the Cat says:

    If the item is sent to the UK and then packaged in the UK they can say produced in the uk. Not the same but if a company produces engines for example and they are sent to India, a feeder vessell takes them to Rotterdam they are then shipped on to India. That is called as export to the EU

  141. 141
    Chris C11nt says:

    F’uck off!

  142. 142
    JabbaTheCat says:

    First and foremost, this is a failure of the EUSSR regulatory system…

  143. 143
    The Third Way doesn't work either says:

    І hаd bееn wоrrіеd thаt yоur Pѕіttасоіdеаn frіеnd hаd fоund іtѕ wаy оntо ѕоmеоnе’ѕ dіnіng tаblе…

  144. 144
    Fed up taxpayer says:

    Remember the plot for the 1973 film Soylent Green where they were feeding people minced up people I wonder today they are they doing it? What happens all the people murdered in the NHS Death pathway I think they are been sent to Findus.

  145. 145
    T'Old Fella says:

    Many have been said in jest, but I remember seeing a TV prog about how cheap sausages are made, scrag ends of meat taken off the bone by high pressure water jets, it put me off sausages for years.

  146. 146
    Anonymous says:

    I’d be shouting this from the rooftops but after eating a crispy pancake I’m feeling a little bit horse.

  147. 147
    One of those EU migrants Dave loves so much says:

    Lead? Did you says lead? Where? We take lead! It on church roofs yes? We steal it tonight. We claiming benefits at this minute, maybe we steal lead later today, yes?

  148. 148
    Butchers Block says:

    She was only the speakers wife but she could lay on the slab and say fillet.

  149. 149
    The Third Way doesn't work either says:

    Ah! That’s better

  150. 150
    T'Old Fella says:

    Pardon?

  151. 151
    Anonymous says:

    Agreed, it’s a non starter.

  152. 152
    Paniagua says:

    Time flies like the wind, but fruit flies like bananas.

  153. 153
    ReefKnot says:

    What, you mean by starting a ….. bonfire ? What a splendid idea. We could get that Pickles chap to manage it. Let’s put it in our Manifesto for the next election !

  154. 154
    Where are Tony Blair's expenses says:

    What is the RSPCA’s position on halal butchery !!

  155. 155
    T'Old Fella says:

    A pony, that’s what Geedo puts in his pocket before he goes on the booze

  156. 156
    Anonymous says:

    No horse can run in the UK with bute in its system.

  157. 157
    The Third Way doesn't work either says:

    It occurs to me that from little acorns mighty oak trees grow. Trouble is it takes a hell of a while and your Emily, or whatever, has buggered off by then…

  158. 158
    T'Old Fella says:

    Leave him Hugh, he is all tucked up in bed with his teddy bear sound asleep unaware of anything amiss, if is asleep it cannot be his fault

  159. 159
    T'Old Fella says:

    In an Owen burger

  160. 160
    Tato says:

    “This horsemeat scandal bollux is a really useful distraction from Dave’s economic failures and gay marriage fiasco.”
    Chapeau!!!!
    Well spotted, it’s called “mass control”, things they used to do in old USSR.

  161. 161
    Says says:

    Ted Kennedy?

  162. 162
    Anonymous says:

    I don’t know if it’s still true today but a couple of years back I remember reading that in India there were an acceptable number of rat droppings (~50) allowed in each bag of rice/grain.

  163. 163
    T'Old Fella says:

    Well you you are the heir of B’Liar

  164. 164
    T'Old Fella says:

    You have 21/4 years Dave to do something significant, as time goes by apart from the financial troubles, which are on going, the Bliar/Brown era is receeding in folks memories and folks tend to compare how they were then to how they are now. So fingers out less spin more action.

  165. 165
    T'Old Fella says:

    Employ Fox and you get a Werritty (who Fox does not know)

  166. 166
    Ah! Monika 2013 +1 says:

    Labour’s motto

    Rich and Marx

  167. 167
    Curly says:

    Was it not the late Robin of the Cook who told us that curried something or other [horse meat?] was now the nation’s favourite food (ahead of jellied eels and mash; and fish’n’chips)?

  168. 168
    T'Old Fella says:

    Language, mummy might see what you have typed, and then smack your botty

  169. 169
  170. 170
    Curly says:

    .. and in China, industrial melamine in children’s milk powder. Happily the perps got caught and came to a very rapid and sticky end – an example we might do well to follow in Britain.

  171. 171
    Catty Comment (Ms) says:

    Too late, fox hunting has been banned (which is why there are now 1000s of them loitering in the middle of the towns waiting to bite off babies’ fingers).

  172. 172
    Yum Yum says:

    Have we met?

  173. 173
    Curly says:

    … and while we are on the subject, A is for ‘orses.

  174. 174
    Anonymous says:

    Throw in a Pickles and it would be enough for 2 years

  175. 175
    Dick the Butcher says:

    I wonder how many of the death-camp gaulieters are of the Common Purpose persuasion.

  176. 176
    Trust Me Dave says:

    The Government says there is no risk to human health.

    The horsemeat is perfectly safe.

  177. 177
    Findus a Tesco says:

    Nothing providing it’s all blended with artificial colours and flavours.

  178. 178
    Politicians and Puclic Sector Skivers says:

    Don’t forget the “Must never happen again” phrase, Joyce

  179. 179
    Joe Public likes crap food says:

    Shark Fin R Us

  180. 180
    Sweeney Todd Tesco says:

    I have a regular supply of faux pork sausage meat.

  181. 181
    PC RSPCA says:

    Mustn’t upset the Mooslims and J-ws.

  182. 182
    Plod are Cnuts says:

    It had LICE marked on the nearside rear door.

  183. 183
    John Gummer's twitching daughter says:

    Mrs Thatcher is doing quite well; thank you for asking.


Seen Elsewhere

Users of Gay Hook-Up App Grindr Infected | TechnoGuido
ISIS Raising Funds Online Using Bitcoin | TechnoGuido
UKIP’s Youth Challenge | BBC
ISIS Operative: This Is How We Send Jihadis To Europe | BuzzFeed
Shapps Defends Bashir Defection | Seb Payne
Tory Leadership Contenders Jostle Over Europe | Alex Wickham
Cutting Taxes is Good For You | Art Laffer
Suspects Will Now Have to Prove Innocence | Laura Perrins
Labour Cllr: Cops Shouldn’t Stop Petrol Thieves | HandF Forum
Creeping Cultural Acceptance of Anti-Semitism | Eric Pickles
Time For Greece to Leave Eurozone | Allister Heath


Rising Stars
Find out more about PLMR AD-MS


Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”


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