January 14th, 2013

Rich’s Monday Morning View


117 Comments

  1. 1
  2. 2
    David Cameron's Office says:

    Good morning, it’s Dave here today until 1pm to answer any questions or help with any problems you might have.

    • 6
      Can't use me old moniker says:

      Dave, on toaday program, when asked what he will say on the EUSSR said, and I quote:

      Squeek, squeek, squeek.

      • 19
        Tell me Prime Ministter...Just who exactly supports you ?? says:

        He was asked who were his allies in the EU for renegotiating UK’s terms of membership and could only come up with Holland(whose PM denied any knowledge of Dave’s keynote speech this week scheduled for The Hague)and Germany(whose politicians inc Merkel have said that they have had enough of Dave’s carping and UK should just make it’s mind up but no re-negotiations are in the offing)

      • 21
        Dan Stato says:

        It does you no good to listen to Cameron on R4 Toady this early in the week.

        What a slimy, duplicitous, mendacious quizzling he is.

        By lunchtime I will be a member of UKIP.

  3. 3
    Tuscan Tony says:

    John Major left front line politics 15 years ago though.

  4. 4
    P l e b says:

    Has Mark been arrested?

    • 67
      trolls are tossers says:

      No. As far as I know he is still hiding out overseas after the African disaster and mummy’s sad decline.

    • 75
      the general public says:

      Hope so, one down one to go. Their crimes against satire and the drawing of cartoons deserve the full penalty of the law.

  5. 7
    JulesW says:

    Looks more like that UKIP chap, Nick Farage

  6. 9
    I d on't need no doctor says:

    Well it would await moderation, because it’s sensible.

  7. 11
    Don't treat my privacy rights like Garbage says:

    Des OConnor?

    • 99
      What Have the Romans done for us? Rubbish collections? Garbage! says:

      My bet is on Terrance Waggon? Can’t be carrying on like that in the beeb and not be in that “club”. Elm Lodge in Barnes that London, was it?

  8. 12
    Koinkidink says:

    Tim Wonnacott without his glasses. Is there going to be an Auction Party then? God knows they’ve had enough coverage.

  9. 13
    Steve Miliband says:

    More Gin Major?

    • 101
      What Have the Romans done for us? Rubbish collections? Garbage! says:

      Gin? Top me up Colonel, please ol’ man,

  10. 14
    Peter Mandelson watch says:

    Does anyone know the whereabouts of Mandy?
    I’m told a ‘squeeze’ has gone missing also.
    The police have have been informed.
    …but couldn’t give a fuck.

  11. 14
    Anonymous says:

    the message for today is that muslims are babies.

  12. 16
    Brown out and pay me damages says:

    Referendum.

  13. 18
    Edinburgh Labour voting dogshit on my shoe says:

    What a hoon.

  14. 25
    Ctesibius says:

    I always accepted that the pointlessness of ‘Rich and Mark’ was part of charm of the Guido experience, but I think the joke has reached its end-point now.

    There’s a sort of post-modern irony in laughing at a cartoon that is supposed to be funny, but which isn’t. But repeating the experience week after week after week and eventually it dawns that the irony is perhaps no longer ironic, and that ‘modern’ is no longer ‘modern’.

    The one positive is that this cartoon makes starting work a bit more alluring.

    • 35
      T'Old Fella says:

      Stop moaning, you know you like the mental exercise early morning to deduce who the cartoon character is, it’s a bit like hard crossword, you feel pleased with yourself when you solve the clue

  15. 26
    £1 says:

    14th January 2013 By Daily Star reporter
    MOST Brits admit to having no idea about politics.

    A poll by TV channel Gold of 2,000 adults found 62% rate their political knowledge as average to poor.

    One in 10 do not know what number Downing Street the PM lives at and 18% that William Hague is Foreign Secretary.

  16. 28
    Tax is theft says:

    Can somebody explain this cartoon to me please?
    No, really.

    • 45
      T'Old Fella says:

      No, but that is what Guido wants you to solve, he knows a lot of this blog are in an alcholic haze after Saturday and Sunday, a chance to kickstart those little grey cells.

    • 94
      Vote4Ukip says:

      I think it is some sad dickhead trying to portray UKIP as racist.

      • 96
        Vote4Ukip says:

        Apparently it is not racist to hate Americans but it is racist to not want to have your country run by corrupt, anti-democrats from across the channel. Funny old world.

  17. 32
    BREAKING NEWS Bank of England says:

    For several years the USA have promised budget deficit reductions but the deficit over the last 20 years has now ballooned to a massive 16 trillion dollars.

    As a result of the “fiscal cliff” settlement we think it highly likely that the deficit will increase during the next 12 months .

    THe Bank has a duty to protect sterling holders and investors and this duty is independent of Government. To achieve this end from noon today The Bank will insist that paper dollars are henceforth covered by a deposit of 0.075 grams of Gold .

    • 39
      DAVE (Triple Dip) Cameron says:

      That 0.075 grams of gold is all we have left after the Mental one sold it all

  18. 33
    old SHEP says:

    Hogarth would be green with envy.

  19. 34
    DAVE (Triple Dip) Cameron says:

    Not only the worst cartoonists known to man , but now they can add worst comedians to their list

    Come back Bernard Manning all is forgiven !

  20. 36
    Anonymous says:

    thought of the day.

    after sun.day the day for worshipping the sun god, today is Mon.day, a day to celebrate the moon.

    order, dis.order…as mercury is the nearest planet to the sun not the moon. so on mercuryday, happy communications everyone.

  21. 40
    Queen Victoria says:

    Things have got bad when you have to re-sue the tweet giving us the UKIP clue. Time to re issue a new cartoonist, methinks

  22. 41
    GEORGE (abacus) OSBORNE says:

    We are all in this together , that is why i’m about to scrap means tested pensions and raise national insurance for 6 million workers

    • 65
      T'Old Fella says:

      “Abacus” are you sure Gideon can use one competently like they still do in the far east

      • 83
        Loopy Lou says:

        It would be much more sensible to pay for pensions by raising Vat by say 0.125%.

        We would then all be able to pay for our pensions in our purchases.

    • 116
      Anonymous says:

      Express today reads “Brussells spends 1 million euros on gifts for ministers” – nice of all us European taxpayers to give them gifts, eh?

  23. 42
    Itsa record breaker says:

    Well done boys, your worst cartoon so far.

  24. 46
    You Couldn't Make It Up says:

    UK’s RAF C-17 plane heading for Mali has broken down in France and is not expected to leave until tomorrow.

    It’s all Thatcher’s fault !!!!!

    • 51
      What Have the Romans done for us? Rubbish collections? Garbage! says:

      FFR are there, even if the French government don’t like to admit it – Yes, a few brits are at the front line there, but they are called Jacques or something, these days, or some other frog name, mon ami.

    • 58
      P l e b says:

      And the Queen’s Bentley wouldn’t start yesterday.

      It’s all CAMERON’S fault

    • 77
      JabbaTheCat says:

      You forgot the ‘innit’…

    • 80
      Synic says:

      Another MoD success! Would the Frogs also like to borrow all the Chinooks we bought a decade ago that have never entered service?

  25. 47
    What Have the Romans done for us? Rubbish collections? Garbage! says:

    THE PLANE THE PLANE

    and Tatto of course,

    three foot nuthing.

    • 52
      Spaz watch says:

      Fuck off with your self indulgent You tube links. Twat!

      • 59
        What Have the Romans done for us? Rubbish collections? Garbage! says:

        Self-indulgent? You english public schooled over-paid educated tories do really need to expand your mind and life, do you?

        Me, self-indulgent, moi? Bet I have got a bigger congregation than yews, twat arseole breath shower drop soap botherer that you are!

        blood pressure check – oh fuck! this is how it will end, a tory thems winding me up. tell my mother I lone her – ok, she snuffed it twelve years ago, but still…

        • 81
          CarryHole is a Dismal Hunt says:

          Do fuck off and stay fucked off.

          There’s a good boyo.

          • What Have the Romans done for us? Rubbish collections? Garbage! says:

            Say’s who?

            You tell me who you are, and I mind consider it “to fuck off”.

            Scared of me? Well, you shouldn’t. in the long run. totally ironically, you will be better of it.

            Could post you a song, but i can’t be arsed.

      • 113
        skorpian de rooftrouser says:

        He is like a small boy in the playground, shouting “look at me, look at me”

    • 61
      Working past 65 should be a choice says:

      Your bin men might still be Romans you Welsh tit but in the modern world we have council ones , Fuckin loads of them
      Infact where i live we have one set for each of the following
      Paper and cardboard
      Glass and metal
      Garden waste
      Household non recyclable

      LABOUR ! Inventing Jobs for the Jobless

      • 89
        What Have the Romans done for us? Rubbish collections? Garbage! says:

        Tories – inventing jobs for their mugs, to put Labour people out of work.

  26. 48
    The Liberals have never been straight says:

    Look Jeremy Thorpe sending a hit man to kill his homosexual lover was bad enough but murderin his lover’s dog is unforgivable.

  27. 53
    Working past 65 should be a choice says:

    After years of squandering taxpayers money and giving your money away to every third world country on the planet ,these cheeky bastards are upping national insurance yet again !
    If we were not giving 55 million a day to the now prosperous third world EU eastern block shitholes , you would still be able to retire at the agreed age of 65 with a much better pension than we have now

    Bring on Nigel and Ukip before these clowns do any more damage

    • 64
      P l e b says:

      Oh how people moaned about Labour and the jobs tax. Now the Tories want to do it so it’s alright.

      Hunts the lot of them.

    • 84
      CarryHole is a Dismal Hunt says:

      NI is a tax on employment. This will raise unemployment still further!

      This is in no-way a conservative government.

      VAT is the worst tax on employment and they raised that too.

  28. 57
    anonymous says:

    Talking of crimes…is it D day for twatface Huhne and his sex club extended family?

  29. 60
    Top Cat says:

    I didn’t realise that officer Dibble had become a plain clothes detective.

  30. 63

    If Guido could overdub this with a soundtrack it would let all we plebs know when to guffaw.

  31. 70
    Raving Loon says:

    I saw one poll putting them on 23%! It’s enough to give one hope!

    • 76
      trolls are tossers says:

      Only 23% of them are certifiably insane? A mistake, surely?

    • 85
      CarryHole is a Dismal Hunt says:

      77% believe what the BBC tell them.

    • 87
      ciconia says:

      Nah….
      The europhiles have got the BBC, most of the Civil Service and politicians, Common Purpose graduates, Erasmus Scholars; regiments of helpers and billions of our cash, and can even call on the US for help.
      It’ll have to rot from within.
      And it will, despite the best spin from Draghi and Barosso.

  32. 74
    Ah! Monika 2013 +1 says:

    They will be a movement to protect tis species within days.

    CLINIC bosses say crab lice are nearly extinct because of a worldwide uptake of women grooming their privates

  33. 88
    Margaret Dodge says:

    Guido is running scared of me.

    • 91
      What Have the Romans done for us? Rubbish collections? Garbage! says:

      Got to be that finely street educated.

      I take classes, well booked up, for tories. But i could push you forward if you want, since you have posted here. I will make you my special pupil, Savile-like, if you want….

      • 106
        What Have the Romans done for us? Rubbish collections? Garbage! says:

        Calfornians with things,
        earthquake here there.
        May tell us things bout,
        weather change stare.

  34. 92
    Operation Crossbow says:

    Radio 5 are in full pro EU mode today. Looks like they don’t want to see an end to the millions the EU bungs them?

    Nicky Campbell really does love the E U

  35. 97
    Tom Catesby says:

    Cameroon says no chance of referendum before next election. pity he didn’t say that before he last election. Looks like the public will have to have their referendum via the ballot box in 2014 or sooner !

  36. 98
    Vote4Ukip says:

    I’m surprised the cartoonist (and I use that in the loosest sense of the word) didn’t just use the first two words of the first line and the last word of the tenth line.

  37. 105
    Tom Catesby says:

    Just a thought on the referendum and Britain’s current membership of the EU. Has anybody else noticed the steady build up of scare mongering via all branches of the media about the ‘dire political, social and economic consequences’, of leaving the EU under the present ‘arrangements’? It is interesting to see, who has been crawling out from under their metaphorical stones, to try to frighten the British people, in pursuit of their own interests or misguided ideologies.

    • 107
      old SHEP says:

      Obama wants us to stay in the EU and has lately also announced that we must not curb our defence spending just in case he needs some more cannon fodder Yukistan, Vote Democrat!.

    • 110
      Mental Elf says:

      Article 50 of The Lisbon Treaty would establish exactly the terms we would accept if we leave the EU.
      Why will Cameron not use these facts to put the argument for staying in?
      He prefers to hide the truth and rely on scare stories.
      This is the treaty that was so important when Brown signed it, Cameron broke his cast iron promise.

    • 114
      Lord Effingham says:

      Well, its going to be fun watching Cameron try to ‘renegotiate’ our membership of the EU, as that’s what he’s pinning all his hopes on. Especially as the EU (or at least the bits that matter) have already said ‘No’.

      Setting himself up for an epic and humiliating failure. He he.

  38. 108
    Ah! Monika 2013 +1 says:

    Ols Shep
    Previous Moniker?

  39. 115
    Etch-A-Sketch for Sale says:

    Is it Dianne Abbott? Excellent likeness if it is.
    Otherwise, it could be somebody who pedals a bike and swears a bit.


Seen Elsewhere

What Farage, Boris and Rob Ford Have in Common | William Walter
Labour Spell New Adviser’s Name Wrong | ITV
Dave Stung by Jellyfish | Sun
City Minister’s Inheritance Tax Dodging Trusts | Indy
What I Would Have Done if I was Sarah Wollaston | Iain Dale
Boris is an Epic Europhile | Louise Mensch
Warsi Got PM to Confront “Secular Fundamentalism” | Fraser Nelson
Guardian April Fools Apology | Press Gazette
Jenni Russell and Her Child’s Godfather, Ed Miliband | Breitbart
Labour’s Left and Right are Growing Restive | Staggers
Corrupt, Incompetent UN Has No Right to Lecture Us | Dan Hannan


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Rod Liddle on the loony UN sexism special rapporteur:

“There is more sexism in Britain than in any other country in the world, according to a mad woman who has been sent here by the United Nations.

Rashida Manjoo is a part-time professor of law at Cape Town University in the totally non-sexist country of South Africa (otherwise known as Rape Capital Of The World).

Mrs Magoo has been wandering around with her notebook and is appalled by the sexist “boys’ club” culture here, apparently.

I don’t doubt we still have sexism in the UK. But is it worse than in, say, Saudi Arabia, d’you think, honey-lamb? Or about 175 other countries? Get a grip, you doolally old bat.”



orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?


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