January 8th, 2013

Dave Sells Out

Tonight will see the PM address his MPs at a briefing about the next election:

From: Government Chief Whip
Sent: 21 December 2012 13:05
Subject: Parliamentary Party Meeting: 8 January 2013

Dear Colleagues,

The Prime Minister has asked me to invite you to an important Parliamentary Party meeting when the House returns in January with a focus on our campaign for the 2015 General Election. There will be a presentation from the Party Chairman and Stephen Gilbert, and the Prime Minister will respond to questions.

This meeting will take place at 17:30 on Tuesday 8th January in the Boothroyd Room.

Due to limitations on space, please confirm your attendance by responding to this email by Friday 4th January.

I hope you have a happy Christmas.

Government Chief Whip

It seems that it’s not just a limited number of hacks that Dave will take questions from, but only a selection of his own Members too. Grumpy MPs were greeted with this last night:

From: Government Chief Whip
Sent: 07 January 2013 19:47
Subject: FW: Parliamentary Party Meeting: 8 January 2013

Dear Colleagues,

Further to this email, due to exceptional demand we are now at maximum capacity and it will not be possible to accommodate those who have not already responded. There will of course be other meetings of the parliamentary party in the future.

Thank you for your patience.

Government Chief Whip

That should keep the troops happy, especially those ones starting to sweat about their seats…


  1. 1
    Grant Shapps aka Michael Green says:

    We are witnessing the biggest economic disaster in history and Cameron’s declared priorities are Gay Marriage and Overseas aid. He will not be forgiven by the “Silver” and Christian voters who will decide the next Election and will not be voting for him on principle. He has to go before its too late.

  2. 2

    Will they sing the red flag?

  3. 3
    Roger says:

    Plenty of room for the disgruntled ones in UKIP.

  4. 4
    Roger says:

    “Dave Sells Out” – I’ve just seen the intentional double meaning in the post’s strapline!
    Dave actually sold out a long time ago.

  5. 5
    Call me Dave says:

    Room for one more. I am not going

  6. 6
    Chris Hunhe says:

    I know it will be packed but I need to get used to living in a small space so can I come?

  7. 7
    Sandra in Accounts says:

    Cameron out.

    Vote UKIP.

  8. 8
    The Muslim Brotherhood says:

    We think you’ll find it’s us that decides who wins the next GE.

  9. 9
    One Term Dave says:

    I have every intention of serving a full term as PM and then another 5 years after 2015. Others of course may have different ideas…..

  10. 10
    Immigrant Shirtlifters says:

    We’re right behind you Dave!

  11. 11
    Raving Loon says:

    The more Dave behaves like he hates his own grassroots, the stronger UKIP will get.

    Bring on the next GE!

  12. 12
    Louise Mensch says:

    “That should keep the troops happy, especially those ones starting to sweat about their seats…”

    I didn’t get where I am today without starting to sweat about Corby.

  13. 13
    Gay Pride Dave says:

    Maybe it should have been “Dave comes out”

  14. 14
    Anonymous says:

    Dave sells Big Issue after 2015.

  15. 15
    Anonymous says:

    It’s known as damage limitation to the cognoscenti, restrict the entrants, after screening out the obvious, then further restrict the questions.
    A personal message to our esteemed PM, your’e finished Cameron, done, an unmitigated disaster for the Conservative Party.

  16. 16
    Anonymous says:

  17. 17
    Nige Garage says:

    Your Tory ship’s holed below the waterline and it’s got a helluva list to the left. Which of you M.P.s are going to resign from it and transfer to UKIP? Come on guys, show some guts!

  18. 18
    PostalVoters R Us says:

    Too true brother.

  19. 19
    Owen Jones says:

    Well off out now for yet another day of striving, a lot of curtains still closed around here, I’m going to tell IDS.

    Never forget that Labour are the Party of the workers and the Tories are the Party of the shirkers.

  20. 20
    Silvio Mafioso says:

    Hey Brutus, wanna borrow my stiletto?

  21. 21
    Mummy Jones says:

    You’re not going anywhere Owen until you’ve finished your sugar free porridge

  22. 22
    Labour says:

    We’ll send you a bag full of money as soon as you register 37,000 cousins to your Bradford address.

  23. 23
    Dave"The One Term Prime Minister" Cameron says:

    “Are you asleep yet love?” I asked Samantha “I’m feeling horny.”

    “No. I’m still awake.” she whispered.

    “OK.” I said, ” I’ll give it another half hour.”

  24. 24
    The truth says:

    Socialism gave us the NHS, the minimum wage and help for the poor.

    Capitalism gave us greed, corporate fraud, sweatshop labour and increased poverty.

  25. 25
    Barbara Cartland says:

    Louise. Ladies “glow” or perhaps “perspire”. They do not “sweat”. That is what virile muscular working class men do in proper bodice ripping novels.

  26. 26
    The Mystical Magical Money Tree says:

    Pick some Baby-Bio up when you are next at the supermarlet will you please

  27. 27
    stewartedwards says:

    Sweat about their seats, can’t imagine why.

    When you put corporate profit above what is decent and proper in a mature nation like ours you are asking for trouble. Even if you don’t read the guardian read this sickening tale by a Doctor. Beggars belief at how cruel our government are, yet Cameron says it isnt cruel – guess he knows better than doctors.


    Basic economics lesson:-

    1. The profit motive does work.
    2. But not everywhere, not if you care and are decent. Why else do you think we no longer have 5 year olds working in factories or workhouses?
    3. The problem comes when the balance between incentive and doing the right thing wavers.
    4. The soluion is not to chase profits at all costs. It is to use common sense. get the right people in the top jobs and inspire.

    As an ex member of the Adam Smith Institute and the tory party I am not adverse to the profit motive, but what has happened in our nation over the past 2 years is a disgrace. The sad bit is that I do have sympathy for our government for I do think that they mean well. But on so many fronts their policies are failing the people of this nation badly.

    Fortunately, the LibDems at least appear to have listened and appear to be learning from their mistakes. Hopefully Cameron and his friends have the wisdom to realise that ideology does not always work in practice, and really could use some no men in there who understand the law of unintended consequences. Not to be difficult but to make things work.

    Giving millions to corporate profits taken from the food and shelter of the vulnerable is a disgrace by any standards. There were easier and fairer ways to make welfare work better. And with all of the computer problems that are occuring juust now with the DWP, it seems like the government are going learn another very hard lesson very soon, that government is not a business, and things dont work the same way. But again it is the poor and vulnerable who are already suffering from the apparently increasingly numerous computer cock ups.

    Remember Tories it is not just the vulnerable, for they all have brothers, sisters, parents, children who vote, and your good words may loose you votes when people look at the plight of their family members.

  28. 28
    Diane Abbott says:

    You sure?

  29. 29
    Dave is Steam Rolling Homosexual Marriage through. says:

    I’m fed up with Dave repeating “I believe in marriage, that is why I believe in gay marriage”. FFS the majority who do not believe in homosexual (gay is modern slang Dave) marriage also believe in marriage. It’s about time the telly interviewers started challenging on this although the metrosexuals at the BBC never will.

    It’s almost as if people are now scared to oppose homosexual marriage in public, just as they are scared to oppose the religion of AGW.

  30. 30
    Fish says:

    ‘…Cameron’s declared priorities are Gay Marriage and Overseas aid…’

    No he hasn’t

  31. 31
    Fish says:

    Vote UKIP, get Miliband

  32. 32
    Dysgenesis R Us says:

    The red flag is turning pink these days!

  33. 33
    Lethargic Tactics says:

    Is it beyond te wit of Dave;s lackies to organise another venue?

    My village hall is free tonight but I’m sure London must have some large meeting halls too

    Perhaps they don’t want to?

  34. 34
    Bubba says:

    You come big in Bubba’s bottom. Or Bubba crush your head.

  35. 35
    Zzzzzzzz says:

    Too many words. Save diatribes for Comment is free.

  36. 36
    albacore says:

    Dear me, Dave can’t afford a big enough venue
    To pile all his obedient Tories into
    Could he be suffering a lack of donations
    For chucking our money at faraway nations?

  37. 37
    Fish says:

    All very good but it was Labour who introduced the ATOS / Work Capability regime – not the baby eating Tories.

  38. 38
    Spartacus says:

    Correct apart from promoting homosexual marriage and overseas aid he is also gunning for fatties.

    But UKIP is gunning for a referendum . . .

  39. 39
    Same difference says:

    Cameron’s a nightmare, Miliband’s a joke.

    Kick Cameron in the nuts; vote UKIP.

  40. 40
    stewartedwards says:

    so perhaps the tories should make it work properly and not have doctors in despair, or ex staff going on the record talking in detail about the disgrace of what happens? But what do they do extend profitable contacts.

  41. 41
    The truth says:

    I’d rather give Priti Patel a facial. She’s fit.

  42. 42
    Old Fella says:

    The dyes used are not very fast and tend to come out in the wash

  43. 43
    Cuntservatives says:

    How many Tories does it take to change a lightbulb?

    None. They get their minimum wage servants to do it for them.

  44. 44
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    Don’t be naive. He’ll have a man to sell it for him.

  45. 45
    Old Fella says:

    Yes, but would they keep their Tory seat?

  46. 46
    Sambo says:

    I see heavily indebted Network Rail is going to spend £37billion on ‘improvements’.

    Bring back British Rail.

  47. 47
    Never Reinforce Failure says:

    That’s the point we have to destroy the current political elite, this will be painful and costly but there is no other option now. With Millibean in power Labour will fuck up and backtrack on everything they promise within 12 months. The fall out from Dave losing to Millibean will mean the Tory Party can be won again for radical Conservatives. It will be painful and bloody but at the end of it you will have a Conservative Party worthy of the name and Labour finished as national party (even more so if Scotland goes UDI).

  48. 48
    Old Fella says:

    No need he will go to the Lords

  49. 49
    Lord Strathclyde says:

    Hear Hear!

  50. 50
    Abbott takes the piss out of her mum. AThe Lady who went to the wall for her. says:

  51. 51
    Living in 96.98 percent white Merseyside says:

    I hate his grassroots as well so who can blame him?

  52. 52
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    Horses sweat, Gentlemen perspire, Ladies glow.

  53. 53
    Lord Strathclyde says:

    I refer the honourable gentleman to my previous reply (49)

  54. 54
    David Laws Lib Dem Fiddler says:

    Don’t forget he labelled his rural grass root voters as Turnip Taliban. So he does not like his grass root rural voters, savers, pensioners, prudent people with pensions or strivers which are getting squeezed by tax every day to fulfil his green tosh and foreign give away schemes- or illegal Libyan war for regime change.

    In contrast he does like Coulson, Brooks, Laws, Mitchell and is the self proclaimed heir to Blair. I am not sure Osborne has got the strategy right to win votes!!

  55. 55
    Moussa Koussa's pet meerkat says:

    Keep it up Stewart. The truth hurts these bastards.

  56. 56
    Old Fella says:

    “With Millibean in power Labour will fuck up and backtrack on everything they promise within 12 months”, that sounds just like Dave and friends

  57. 57
    Moussa Koussa's pet meerkat says:

    “Is it beyond the wit of Dave;s lackies to organise another venue?”

    Probably. If it means leaving the Houses of Parliament they won’t have a clue.

  58. 58
    Fabians are Evil says:

    Dark brown! are you sure they are not talking about your great big arse Diane?

  59. 59
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    Never assume conspiracy when sheer incompetence provides an explanation. In this case Shapps failed to find accommodation big enough to hold the Parliamentary Party for a must-attend meeting, thereby proving himself as inept as all the other Cameroons. Mind you, after 2015 that will no longer be a problem.

  60. 60
    Socialism is a severe mental illness says:

    The NHS deathcamps are a very bad example of Socialist ‘success’.

    But either way, try having a Socialist utopia without Capitalism’s taxed profits paying for it all.

    You don’t think the taxes paid by Labour-voting chavs are going to fund it all, do you? Perhaps 10p from every sale of the Guardian will fund the annual £110bn NHS running cost?

    Good luck with that.

  61. 61
    Living in 96.98 percent white Merseyside says:

    According to Andrew Rawnsley writing in The Observer back in 1997 the Tories were done forever. 16 years later and he’s still right.

    Seems Labour are the future.

  62. 62
    Cuntservatives says:

    The Labour Party is no longer the Labour Party. It was killed stone dead by Tony Blair and Peter Mandelson. What they perpetrated in their 13 years was neither socialism or capitalism. It was crony capitalism, giving favours, contracts and pulling scams to help themselves and their friends, creating an artificial boom that put their spending spree on the national credit card and left it for the public to pay off for years to come. With all this, as well as Iraq and cosying up to Bush, Blair was about as left wing as Charlton Heston.

  63. 63
    Old Fella says:

    Silivio, I would have thought a gladius was more your weapon

  64. 64
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    In 1910, Churchill, then President of the Board of Trade, gave a speech forecasting the emergence of the NHS and a State-run safety net for the poor. Labour had barely found some smoke-filled rooms to meet in. Yet another example of Conservative initiatives being turned into Labour bandwagons.

  65. 65
    Woolyback says:

    You want UKIP to win, not look like a Conservative retread, let those weak twots rot in hell and work with people who want to be UKIP MPs.

  66. 66
    Hanukkas Bazzokas (A Greek Gentleman) says:

    Look, do we ever learn, it is all a merry go round of shhhh height.
    In America, they swapped a mad neo-con bomber for a nice gentle, constitutional loving black man. But, all he really was Bush disguised as a fiendish clown black and white minstrel who to top it all is making a grab for their guns…
    I do not think UKid will save you, Farrage is just controlled opposition

  67. 67
    retardEd Miliband's Parasite Party (for shirkers, not workers) says:

    Yes, Comrade Parasite! Oh how right you are! Parasites, shirkers and spongers unite! Do not accept work from the evil Tories! Our Dear Leader will pay you, with money plucked from the branches of the Magic Money Tree, to stay in bed!

  68. 68
    Woolyback says:

    No school today Owen, kids have gone back after the Xmas break around this end of the rubbish tip.

  69. 69
    eat your greens says:

    Rupert stirs up the climate change monkeys.

  70. 70
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    How many socialists does it take to change a lightbulb?

    None. They order their unpaid interns and illegal immigrant servants to do it for them.

  71. 71
    Mr Curious says:

    How would that (a) pay off Network Rail’s debt and (b) fund £37bn of improvements?

  72. 72
    She could do with losing a few stone says:

    I bet Diane is very jealous of Oona King being on Dancing on Ice. I’ll never forget reading an interview with King who said Abbott was very cold and unfriendly towards her when she entered parliament because she wanted to be the only famous female black politician and she hated the attention King was getting.

  73. 73
    Anonymous says:

    So what?

    The current government is just a continuation of Labour policies.

  74. 74
    Woolyback says:

    Socialism gave us the NHS, the minimum wage and help for the poor.

    It gave us pain for everybody except socialist MPs, they were too busy rifling peoples savings, so they could become millionaires, ask 9 houses his grace teflon Tony.

  75. 75
    Climate Change says:

    Climate change is real you heartless tory bastards!!!!!

  76. 76
    albacore says:

    So, was Di the sofa, or only a chair?
    Please don’t tell us there’s another pair out there

  77. 77
    Charlie Peace says:

    None. They get their unpaid intern to do it for them.

  78. 78
    Old Fella says:

    A long but good post Stewart, summed up by, before moving off ensure brain is engaged

  79. 79
    WILLIAM , SEB'S HOE says:

    Dave sold us all out by lying about a referendum

  80. 80
    Old Fella says:

    They don’t want to pay for a venue, why should party political meetings be held at the public’s expense.

  81. 81
    Fish says:

    They are.

    Labour engaged ATOS and with it systemic problems with the referral / feedback mechanisms, this together with ATOS’s inability to cope with demand created these sort of problems.

    When he arrived, IDS demanded things be put right.

  82. 82
    Old Fella says:

    None they get their facilities company to come to change the light bulb at the public expense.

  83. 83
    Fish says:

    MK. Bastards possibly, but you can’t get away from the fact that this hated Tory initiative was actually the Labour bastards baby.

    But reinventing and airbrushing history has always been the stock in trade of the left

  84. 84
    Fish says:

    Why? What did Dave promise?

  85. 85
    Hanukkas Bazzokas (A Greek Gentleman) says:

    And, before that, you had Mad Dame Scratcher, continuing the light touch regulation of the financial industry, destroying our manufacturing…can you see a pattern?
    Of course, some of the lunatics comenting here get all teary eyed about the old witch pedo-enabler.
    They are all the same bags of shhh height, even farrage…

  86. 86
    Woolyback says:

    If Labour hadn’t open the doors to immigration, we wouldn’t need “minimum wage” for working people, a vote for Labour is a vote for poor wages or the dole.

  87. 87
    Fish says:

    Oona or Diane.

    Which one would you choose?

  88. 88
    stewartedwards says:

    Seems he has failed then.

  89. 89
    Old Fella says:

    Daves smoke and mirrors. I suppose all those commuter types will be asked to fork out in higher fares, after all high rail fares put off plebs from travelling by rail so those that do will know those that do travel by rail are decent sorts of chaps and well heeled, a bit like in certain pubs, high prices keep the plebs out (except Bullingdon Boys, they are chaps, what, what).

  90. 90
    Hanukkas Bazzokas (A Greek Gentleman) says:

    He mad a “Cast-Iron” commitment, with conditions that he knew he would not have to keep.
    Hence, Mr Slippery…

  91. 91
    A Carpenter says:

    … and the great unwashed stink…

  92. 92
    A Carpenter says:

    Is the Hackney Empire canteen free?

  93. 93
    A Carpenter says:

    .. but does entail staying in bed until at least 9.30 every morning (to avoid the rush hour on the way to pick up the giro).

  94. 94
    A Commuter says:

    To whom is is NR indebted? and why?

  95. 95
    Not a jolly green giant says:

    You would need to be jolly strong to be able to life Diane in a pas de deux on ice!

  96. 96
    Not a jolly green giant says:

    * lift

  97. 97
    David Cameron types always shits on North of England says:

    Bet the Chipping Norton set had the first refusal, even ones that are turnip farmers.

  98. 98
    David Cameron types always shits on North of England says:

    Dave sold us all out by lying about everything. The only true fact he has come out with is that he is almost three years older. Time stops for no man.

  99. 99
    Airey Belvoir says:

    I doubt it would be floral.

  100. 100
    David Cameron types always shits on North of England says:

    Wonder if Dave has sold his pushbike, and still has that ludicrous windmill on his roof?

  101. 101
    Fish says:

    Depends how historic some of these cases are. I know ATOS have had their collar felt.

  102. 102
    Fish says:

    Our industries destroyed themselves. A la British Leyland. Or some with the help of the Civil Service A la BAC, who designed build civil aircraft by committee that no one else would buy. Or A la our shipbuilders who were being outperformed by German and Asian yards.

  103. 103
    Handycock (Teen Fondler) says:

    Well done boys. Boaz.

  104. 104
    Silvio Mafioso says:

    My gladius is strictly reserved for vaginae. The stiletto is best for slipping unobtrusively between the ribs of unwanted politicians.

  105. 105
    Casual Observer says:

    To point on why child labour ruled out: Yes, ethically it is unsound, but extending coverage down to that age group would increase social security costs immensely.

    Good to raise that point as one action government has taken to reduce social security bill has been to target child benefit.

    Sensible policy, but still none the less ethically questionable if one regards government as an entity which should in part take the interests of the weakest and most vulnerable to heart.

    NB: I am not a socialist.

  106. 106
    Casual Observer says:

    To further my previous point:

    Government makes it illegal to employ children, so children are now dependent on parents / government for resources.

    Government removes benefits available to children (albeit via their parents) for a large number.

    Government has there just rendered children non $ earning.

    This is actually ethically very unsound indeed if one thinks about it. One hopes the next generation realizes this and appropriately disconnects itself from the state.

  107. 107
    Barbara Cartland says:

    Quite right. Please accept my apologies. I was distracted by my masseur’s rippling biceps while I was dictating 25 above.

  108. 108
    Samcam says:

    It’s been two hours now. It’s still all floppy. Are you sure you wouldn’t do better with one of your Cabinet boyfriends?

  109. 109
    Bronco says:

    She does a real good cowgirl too

  110. 110
    You can't get more public expense than the Boothroyd room says:

    And there was me thinking that that the Boothroyd room at Portcullis House was very much a public expense. So much so that only the public pays for it and only the MPs use it.

  111. 111
    Doormat Dave says:

    I want to serve the public. Please wipe your feet on me on the way out.

  112. 112
    arse fuck for freedom says:

    With the title “Earl Sodomite” – richly deserved.

  113. 113
    arse fuck for freedom says:

    apart from the “within 12 months” bit – Cun*t Cameron managed it within 12 minutes.

  114. 114
    arse fuck for freedom says:

    She only deals in cutcock

  115. 115
    William and Seb says:

    We always buck him up with a stiff one.

  116. 116
    arse fuck for freedom says:

    Anyone connected with New Labour = total cun*t.

    PS including cun*ts like Cameron who seems to have built his political “philosophy” on it

  117. 117
    arse fuck for freedom says:

    Fair, but I’d still do anal on her. I couldn’t say that for Nige.

  118. 118
    arse fuck for freedom says:

    Couldn’t the use Moshe Schappstein’s local synagogue?

  119. 119
    arse fuck for freedom says:

    And almost three stone heavier, the fat cun*t.

Seen Elsewhere

UKIP on 23% With Survation | Mirror
UKIP Could Deal With Dave | Douglas Carswell
Tories Would Lower Benefit Cap | Telegraph
Bashir Twitter Meltdown | Mirror
Bashir is a Wrong’un | Norman Tebbit
Natalie Bennett Says it Should Not be a Crime to Belong to ISIS | Indy
LibDems Fifth in London | Standard
45 Mirror Group Stories Linked to Phone-Hacking | Press Gazette
Dave’s Diet | Speccie
Pink’O’Flynn | HuffPo
Trojan Horse Destroying British Values | Nick Wood

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