January 5th, 2013

Saturday Seven Up


  1. 1

    Good to see someone is up.

    Now, what were we talking about?

    • 14
      T. P. Fuller says:

      I’d forgotten it’s Saturday — truly. Thought “WTF?” when I saw this post, even refreshed my browser.

    • 22
      Busy doing nothing says:

      I see government and opposition are busy dreaming up new cunning plans that cost little or no money to implement in an attempt to make them appear busy.

      Unfortunately many if not all of these schemes are either draconian or very troublesome to the population. Examples are homosexual marriage, minimum booze price, female board quotas, fat limits in food, tumours in fags, I’m more greener than you are, Olympic legacy, the BBC, Mili Fowler and the McCans.

      • 37

        Forcing the long term unemployed to work !
        Outrageous , must be against their human rights , i mean breed all day and still be expected to work ?
        And of course it is there human right to smoke where the hell they want
        So will all you would be employers please make suitable arrangements for smoking areas inside your places of work , could you also make sure you have an adequate supply of Stella and weed and rearrange your hours of work to start at 4.00PM and finish at 5.00PM

        Thank you

        • 48
          Harry Styles says:

          Would you buy their album?


        • 49
          H@rry Styles says:

          Would you buy their album?


        • 52
          Anonymous says:

          There is always an advantage for left wing parties to keep poor poorer, if poor become richer they will not vote for them.

          This is why I don’t understand the current conservative party policy. They want to even make middle class poorer. There is no democratically elected government in a free and fair election winning general election by reduced the living standards of voters.

        • 56
          Well it's a thought says:

          Problem is it will cost us more to put the long term into employment then it would if you just paid them employment benefits, every thieving tosser all the way down the feeding trough, from uncivil servants, politicians, companies, hangers on, hangers off, agents, middlemen will all want their cut in “helping” these unfortunate people to enjoy 6months of “work”, stop immigration then maybe we will have some jobs free for us ethnics.

          • LEFT OUT says:

            This is where Labour has not thought it through.How many businesses have the time or inclination to devote to a troublesome long term unemployed liability hanging around their premises?

            It really is a disaster in the making. Do we really want arse and nose pickers working in cake factories or a buckfast addict stacking shelves?

      • 47
        Anonymous says:

        We are in a situation where most LD MPs are going to lose their seats to their coalition partners (Con) and to the party (Lab) they share more of their ideology with. This government is still going on as LD MPs who wants to enjoy the trapping of power are persuading other LD to stay in this government.

        LD had lost over 50% of votes they got in the last general election. As general elections nears LD will want to show policy difference with Conservatives to try and save their seats. Some might even want to jump ship if they will be accepted; LD has become a toxic party due to breaking promises to its supporters.

        Conservative leadership also wants to enjoy the trapping of power. So there is a good chance we will not have a general election until 2015 as its not in the interest of both Conservative and LD leadership. But we will end up with a zombie government.

        Inability of the present leadership to run the country will end up costing UK dearly. If like Michael Foot and Mrs T had forming a government there is hardly any thing in common between Conservatives and LD except gay marriage. This is why gay marriage ended up being the flag ship government policy. Even in that they cannot have common ground, one side wants gay marriage in places of God other doesn’t.

    • 67
      Ah! Monika 2013+1 says:

      Emptying caches….didn’t work

      • 68
        Anonymous says:

        test anon

      • 105
        Mine d'Boggles says:

        Try this:

        For a PC using Internet Explorer
        Click on TOOLS.
        Select the GENERAL tab.
        Choose the option for TEMPORARY INTERNET FILES
        Select DELETE FILES
        Click OK to remove the cache

        If you are using another OS – sorry! Don’t know.

        • 112
          Tachybaptus says:

          In Chrome,
          click on Ξ
          from the menu select Tools
          from the menu select Clear Browsing Data
          from the menu select Empty the cache
          click on Clear browsing data
          Be careful NOT to select Clear saved passwords.

          • Ah! Monika 2013 +1 says:

            Thanks to all. Chrome. Def emptied cache but no joy
            Also run Ccleaner just to make sure.
            No probs will just keep incrementing as and when.

    • 75

      Mornin Moniker ! one question Head or tail ?LoL

    • 88
      Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

      Talking about? This that and the other, as usual. Been watching the beeb iplayer since about six this morning, in my land of the twitching net curtains.

      • 90
        Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

        And I recommend watching James May’s Toys with his toy glider. Seen it quite a few times now. One day left.

  2. 2
    Living in 96.98 percent white Merseyside says:

    I’ve been shopping on Amazon since 7am. Gotta spend my benefits and pensions on something.

  3. 4
    restore the monasteries says:

    Very mild in the monastic cell,listening to “Sounds of the Sixties”
    on my crystal set.Morning all…..

  4. 6
    King Augeas says:

    There is nothing quite as good as having a monster shite first thing in the morning. Sets you up for the day.

  5. 7
    Casual Observer says:

    Gay Bishops Good.
    Women Bishops Bad.
    We must keep these wimmin things in their place. As true believers we must stick together with our fellow tallyban nutters.

    • 15
      T. P. Fuller says:

      >we must stick together

      You could have rephrased that.

    • 16
      Father O'Fondle says:

      I’m afraid criticism is not allowed, as bishop bashing is a mortal sin.

    • 20
      Father Jack says:

      That is an ecumenical matter.

      • 55
        restore the monasteries says:

        The Church Of England,has lost its way and ,in my opinion,is being forced
        to adopt “Modernity”…probably ,in large part,against its will.
        What are the movers and shakers trying to do to a once,stable,authoritive
        institute or club.Completely trash it by my observations,and make it a place
        of absolute ridicule.Well,definatly succeeded there.
        What with Heresy,bum boys,and weakness,the authority and respect has evaporated…To Justin, just say “NO”.
        Corrigenda…….Cucullus non facit monachum….. PS..i am not a church goer,
        but,am sad to see it buggered up!!! literally….

        • 59
          Well it's a thought says:

          Nobody is interested in the CofE as a church anymore, like the Post Office both have been in decline , with the help of the nutters in charge, as with the railways, these organisations have vast amounts of good quality land, that could be made available for a nice price, it seems the sell off of assets is back on.

          • Sir William W says:

            Senior clergy are always a bit embarrassing, I’m afraid. The average Anglican doesn’t give a fig for these disputes and is perfectly happy with any vicar who is a decent sort, believes in God, has people’s interests at heart and can bring in the punters. Unfortunately the type of laity who attend Synod self-select from among the minority of ideologues and sectaries.

        • 121
          Marmite says:

          Agree 100% ‘Restore’. What the feckin hell has happened to our Country & it’s Institutions?

        • 160
          Sir William says:

          Senior clergy tend to be a bit embarrassing, I’m afraid. Most Anglicans are perfectly happy with any vicar as long as he/she believes in God, is helpful and sympathetic and can bring in the punters. Unfortunately the sort of people who make a noise at General Synod self-select from among the opinionated and the sectarian.

          • CoE since childhood says:

            Sorry, the whole point of the CofE was that you DIDN’T have to believe in god. Things started declining when all these evangelical sort of people arrived.

        • 225
          Living in 96.98 percent white Merseyside says:

          I look at other religions and think thank goodness for the good old C of E. We can have a chuckle at the issues affecting such as vicars in knickers or pulpit poofs (as The Sun calls them) but no-one is laughing at the child sex-abuse scandals affecting the RC Church.

          And that other religion – need I say more?

  6. 9
    George Osbourne says:

    I hope this footage of yesterday’s Cabinet meeting reassures everyone that the financial crisis is fully under control.

    • 161
      Sir William says:

      This is quite unrealistic. Gordon flogged off all our gold in a fire sale, years ago.

  7. 10
    Anonymous says:

    So the idiots ithe labour party want legislate to control the amount of sugar,salt in childrens breakfast cereal -what a bunch of prats.
    A more socially beneficial action will be to repeal the horrible bill which gave the right to sodomise the anus of 16 yo boys

    • 18
      Ed Bollux says:

      Steady on Guys. We need kids to be overweight so that they grow into the next generation of obese benefiteer Liebour voters waddling through the shopping malls and growing the economy.

    • 25
      coming soon to a town near you. New Labour, New Stasi. says:

      So if a mother serves her sprogs the wrong kind of breakfast, will the plod batter down the door to the family home and arrest her?

  8. 17
    Dave "Butch" Cameron says:

    After sleeping with a high class escort I got my money out to pay.

    “You charge £600 right?” I said as I handed over the money.

    “That’s £600 an hour” she replied, as she gave me £590 change.

    • 23
      Big Bertha says:

      That was because I felt sorry for you. I’ve never been with such a weak little failure before.

    • 24
      Ed Scrotum says:

      So it was all over in, let me see, allowing for inflation and value subtracted tax … twenty minutes?

    • 162
      Sir William says:

      As Jasper Carrott used to say, “Premature ejaculation? Not from our point if view it isn’t!”

  9. 21
    nellnewman says:


    well we have to give labour some credit – 2 policy decisions in 2 days to fill up militwit’s blank sheet of paper.

    He wants to legislate for the amount of salt and sugar in our diets – obviously he doesn’t think we are capable of doing that for ourselves.

    And then he sends balls yesterday to tell us that when he gets into no10 he’ll be robbing pensions to give government non-jobs to the long term unemployed.

    Didn’t they try both those things whilst gordon was in power at great expense and to no effect?

    • 139
      Food Watch says:

      There was a study done into wheat and it’s effect on the bodies metabolism performed in the US last year which is interesting reading.

      It studied specifically flour derived from the main commercial varieties which are grown these days. These are incidentally GM.

      What was found is interesting: Wheat today is different to what it was 40 years ago. There are some proteins now included which in most people have an interesting effect on the insulin cycle.

      Banning cereal like this and lecturing about sugar consumption is really a back door way of reducing sugar intake. Many plantations are being turned over for ethanol production at present.

      Banging on about obesity, which is easy to beat for most with regular light exercise, avoiding processed foods (particularly those containing artificial sweeteners) and cutting bread / wheat products from diet, is just brain washing to convince people they should eat less.

      There is a massive food price inflation on the way – expect to see your shopping bill go up by 20% within the next 4 months.

      This is due to the poor harvests globally for two years running. Remember: We are only ever 3 days from revolution.

    • 198
      The Insurance Firm of Kray & Kray says:

      See, nellnewman, this is what happens when you tell the Government, all right, we want a national health care delivery system free at point of service. The Government, being your health insurer, if they have any sense, will do like your life/accidental death insurers (or for that matter, homeowners/auto insurers, either) and say, well, can’t have too much moral/morale hazard here; we don’t want you doing anything that makes it more likely we’re actually going to have to pay out anything on your account. This goes for policies which close pubs and outlaw tobacco smoking as well.

      In our day, we put it a bit more succinctly:
      “You do what we tell you, if you want to stay healthy!”

  10. 27
    Old Fanny Gaslight (yours for a fiver and a bag of chips) says:

    There’s a time and a place for that trademark thumb-jab, ducky.

  11. 28
    Ed Balls(Chancellor Of The Exchequer Designate) says:

    The IMF releases research that it significantly underestimated the damage austerity would do http://thinkprogress.org/economy/2013/0

    • 34
      VoteUkip says:

      The Labour party significantly underestimated the damage it did the country with its failure to regulate banks properly, its over-staffing of the public sector with far too many costly workers, needlessly allowing into the country millions of immigrants, failure to enforce the law properly with regard to press abuse, failure to consider the massive impact the huge subsidies for wind turbines would have on fuel bills, etc.

      • 50
        Millicnut says:

        Stop confusing me with facts.

      • 63
        Well it's a thought says:

        I don’t think they underestimated anything, they did it to destroy the country, after all the people had voted in the Conservatives 3 times and like the damage they did to plod this was Liebours get their own back on the population time, while the brain dead waved at his highness teflon tone, we got what was voted in, pure hate just like they hiss an spit now, just like the postal voting con, we will get the same in 2015, but expectations of a peaceful country is zero this time.

  12. 29
    VoteUkip says:

    Westminster MPs were doing a panto based on The Wizard of Oz.

    Cameron played the tin man (no heart).
    Miliband played the scarecrow (no brain).
    Clegg played a munchkin.

  13. 31
    Ready made Ed says:

    So how does Red Ed intend to police sprog food?

    Is he going to give the council powers to enter homes and test the food that mum serves up, or does his rarefied experience of life lead him to think that the masses no longer cook and live a llife of ready made meals?

    • 36
      Living in 96.98 percent white Merseyside says:

      It’s the weekend! I treat myself to 2 delicious bacon wraps and cream cakes from Greggs. I do watch my diet during the week though.

    • 42

      They can do all the testing in the kitchens at McDonalds

      • 86
        Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

        Fuck McDees, Wimpy my man – brilliant quarterpounders.

        • 97

          We here are now in the 21st century ,Wimpey died out here 30 years ago and only remain in small shit kicking third world countries Such as Wales !

          • P Chuter says:

            Still going great guns in the cities, apparently.


            Their website says they have 16 restaurants in the UK
            I think as most of them are on motorways and serve shite they mean
            Rest a rooms

          • Big Bertha says:

            Step aside. I’ll put the shits up ‘em.

          • Ban All Bran - it is an offense to toilet pans says:

            Rare as white dogturd now in Wales too, these days, pal. But whenever I see one, I always pullover and fill my guts up. Have a side salad with it too, for the bowels you know. And they have wholemeal buns, not made of sponge like that yank crap.

            Where’s my spitfire, chocks away…

          • Ban All Bran - it is an offense to toilet pans says:

            Rare as white dogturd now in Wales too, these days, pal.

          • Ban All Bran - it is an offense to toilet pans says:

            Rare as white dog poo now in Wales, too, these days, pal. But whenever I see one, I always pullover and fill my guts up. Have a side salad with it too, for the bowels you know. And they have wholemeal buns, not made of sponge like that yank crap.

            Where’s my spitfire, chocks away…

          • Ban All Bran - it is an offense to toilet pans says:

            ah I see m o d b o t where I offended one, saying doggie poo is better? : )

  14. 32
    Mustapha ben Effit says:

    I loves David Camron. I no work for 25 years and now get pension of £140 in 2015. I votes Tory.

    • 40
      Living in 96.98 percent white Merseyside says:

      That’s not much Mustapha. I get loads more than that. I’m considering taking a Baltic Benefit Cruise this year. Would love to see St Petersburg again – went there in 1972.

    • 41
      Dmitri from Athens says:

      But we get 13 pay cheques a year here.

    • 65
      Ah! ffs says:

      I don’t think you see what how your comment reads do you, it reads 13 years of Labour as usual did nothing to help you get a job.

  15. 35
    Lost in Clacton says:

    At least when Hollande says he is going to take 75
    per cent of your money he says he will only do it for two years.

    With Cameron and Osborne they want to take 65 per cent every year.

    • 39
      A Chinaman with lots of pieces of paper showing George Washington says:

      But if Hollande takes 75 per cent of your money and Cameron takes 65 per cent then the figures will not work out.

      It will all end in tears and bankruptcy and only the Russians will have any money.

    • 44
      Living in 96.98 percent white Merseyside says:

      I’m a taxpayer! One of my pensions is taxed at source. They deduct about 6 quid a month.

      The very idea!

    • 69
      Ah! ffs says:

      What no change then that must be good, Labour did it for 13years.

      • 84
        Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

        christ almighty, change the record will you with your misinformation. We were doing fine before George dubious Bush’s property reality housing south sea bubble, bringing down world capitalism.

        • 100
          Ah! ffs says:

          So Labour were not in charge of this country for 13 years , they never made 3000 laws most unenforceable, they never foresaw the damage that was kicking off , Brown never sold 300 tons of gold to help a bank, it was America’s fault, but how? Brown saved the world, pull the other one it’s got bells on.

          • Gordon Brown says:

            Don’t worry, the Yanks have been selling off all their helium just to balance things up :
            Let’s party like it’s 2007.

          • Ban All Bran - it is an offense to toilet pans says:

            Looking back, Labour were only in charge in name only, it seems. The City tory donators made sure of that. Told Blair to put them all up against the wall, well, some at least to make an example to the rest, but he thought it would have been slightly extreme…

  16. 45
    albacore says:

    Operation Yewtree screaming blasts from the past
    Now that’s dedication, making nostalgia last
    Old Bill out showboating, red in talons and fangs
    No-one wants to hear about today’s grooming gangs

    • 53
      PC Plodders says:

      Can’t touch them Parkies. It wouldn’t be PC. After all their Mozzie religion allows them to maltreat girls and women especially white ones.
      We might go after the C of E, however. Their No Women Bishops policy is clearly sexist.

  17. 46
    Prick Forbes says:

    Here on Newcastle Council we have been heartbroken by the cuts we have forced to make by the unfeeling Tories. So much so that we will have to raise the council tax to fund the £16 million we have made in redundancy payments in the lasy year and to fund our local council pension scheme. Our ambition now must be to regain top spot for the highest council tax bills in the country. This is the only league Newcastle have ever been top of. Howay the lads!

  18. 51
  19. 57
    Owen Jones says:

    Thank you,George Osborne.

    Hat Tip Patrick O’Flynn

    Had Labour been invited to devise a method by which the Conservatives could turn a million or so voters against them just in time for polling day it surely could not have surpassed this effort by Mr Osborne.
    Thanks to him many husbands and wives have already had lively discussions over Christmas about whether to stop claiming or take the hit on a tax return. By early 2015 the majority who have chosen the latter course will be presented with a four-figure tax demand.

    How many of them do you think are going to vote Conservative on May 7, 2015? I certainly wouldn’t fancy being the Tory canvasser who has to knock on their doors during the election campaign.

    • 95
      Ah! bisto says:

      The Nu Conservatives are just marching on the spot wasting time, waiting for your lunatics to get back in 2015, to take their rightful blame for the damage to the country that they did in their 1997/2010 reign of terror, what with Scottish SNP who by then may have had a referendum, we will then have an idea if Labour ever get back in to finish destroying the country again.

      • 118
        Tachybaptus says:

        The lunatics escape blame, because the electorate has the attention span of a goldfish. That’s why, if things go on as at present, they will be elected with a big majority in 2015. And after they have finally wrecked the country, they will escape blame again.

  20. 60
    Ten Bellies Jaqui Smith says:

    But isn’t Diane Fatbot a major flaw in Red Ed’s healthy eating initiative?

    • 74
      Rage says:

      Ban sugar and salt from childrens breakfast food.
      Tax payers keep feeding MPs to the tune of £170/week for subsidised scran-lubby lubby

      • 82
        Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

        Basic foods are going to skyrocket in price this year, so says this morning’s Daily Wail. Never mind about battling to buy fashion goods in the sales, there will soon be a scrum for spuds in your local supermarket.

        • 115
          Ah! ffs says:

          Outside of Londonistan, there’s no real sales, they have marked some tat down as clearance, yet the shops have been full, so much for food aid on the streets of this country, high prices for tat and free food, all business, helps I suppose, especially giving immigrants a decent job.

  21. 61
    Ah! Monika 2013 says:

    Why are US Congress and Senate members so much more impressive than ours?
    ( excepting Presidential Candidates )

  22. 62
    Ah! Monika 2013 says:

    Gay rights campaigner Peter Tatchell says he hopes a gay Welsh cleric can now become an Anglican bishop after the church relaxed its stance on the issue.

    Gay….maybe; but WELSH??

  23. 71
    Blowing Whistles says:

    The award for Bandwagon jumping hypocrite of the week goes to Conor Burns MP – (he’s all huffy and going to report to his committee) who got all huffy about some comedians going a bit ott AFTER the WATERSHED – yet he thinks nothing of his gaybos parading around in womens frilly knickers and all manner of sexual paraphenalia on the streets during their pride marches. Said public sexualisation ought to be kept for their private meetings and not be on parade in the streets in front of children from dawn to dusk. One would think that he has a one eyed demented inverted logic to his existence/agenda.

    Hypocrite of the week.

    • 73
      Casual Observer says:

      K weer M.P. of the week.

    • 76
      Not Blowing Whistles says:

      To be fair, the gaybos in frilly knickers and bondage gear making idiots of themselves on marches is hardly sexualization, just irritating and very bad taste.

      Unless of course people get turned on by ultra low budget rocky horror backdropped by the grey rain of urban decay these days.

      ‘Slut walk’s much the same. I do not buy into any arguments that these do not advocate r@pe, but for sure they demonstrate an amoral lack of self respect on the part of the participants.

    • 80
      Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

      It’s Gove, always Gove, for months now. Frankly, he is a knob.

  24. 77
    Orwell Watch says:

    The following statement is both totalitarian and racist: Unity in Diversity

    A totalitarian government will have to be revisionist with history in order to coerce its policies and views onto a population. Th education system is an obvious starting point, historical events important to national identity a propaganda target.

    It is surprising that many people have not figured out that there is one rather large elephant in the room, so far as countries are concerned:


    Incidentally: Quebec is an inconvenient truth.

    • 84
      Anonymous says:

      like a bamboo tree…be strong, be flexible, be connected at the roots…with other bamboo trees.
      collectivism as a counter to global.whatnot.

  25. 79
    Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

    Why don’t you post the hours and minutes spent, actively, on this site Guido? Always complain to ISPs about that. Especially with the shit videos I post here, surprising taking up peoples time, before they complain like whinging ninnies.

    • 87
      Never mind little one, were all winners says:

      Their’s always a fkin idiot about anywhere that try’s to destroy things they don’t understand, never mind school is back next week or you will just get fed up doesn’t matter which, nobody watches the crap you put up.

      • 91
        Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

        See what I mean? And I am 51 next week, by the way, believe it or not. And oh yes, I have got shares in youtubby, plus a shitload of google, when they took it over.

        Pipe and slippers fella I am.

  26. 81
    Weetie Tax says:


    RT @WelshToy: Andy Burnham. Cereal Killer.

    • 83
      Labours Dogs Breakfast says:

      “Crunchy Nut Cornflakes are just Frosties for w*nkers”.

      • 89
        Ah! bisto says:

        So Liebour are going to have less friut and nut cases, great idea.

        • 93
          Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

          Knew you tories were weetabix. Porridge not good enough for you?

          • Mr Weetabix says:

            Everyone loves me except the coeliacs !

          • Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

            Millet flakes is a fine alternative, says my mate with the shits, if you can manage to beat off the fucking budgies.

        • 108

          I’ve never tried to “Beat off” a budgie is it legal ?

          • Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

            No – no one has been up in front of the magistrates for stealing a budgie’s millet, I believe.

          • GERRARD DOGGYDOO says:

            WELSH COMEDIANS ARE SHITE , says

            Surely you missed the opportunity to say “Up before the Beak” ?

    • 137

      PORRIDGE = Shredded newspaper covered in Jock Jizz

  27. 94
    EU Watch says:

    Could it be that the EU is proving in microcosm that applying a uni-polar political system to a multi-polar economic system is extremely unstable in transition ?

    And conversely that imposing a uni-polar economic system on a multi-polar political system is equally unstable ?

    Interesting article comparing 1913 with 2013 – not to do with Europe, but considers this at the global level:


    One suspects that the US federal system is a fluke case, perhaps giving the appearance of stability by it’s unique characteristics in the world.

  28. 98
    Inconvenient Truth for the Lefties says:

    A healthy economy which can provide jobs is more efficient and effective at lifting people out of poverty than government benefits.

    • 101
      Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

      Dream on. Economy is relative – get rid of the cash blood suckers I say, and pay your fair whack of taxes, you Jonathan Ross types.

      • 103
        Inconvenient Truth for the Lefties says:

        Is the tax required to support a large government fair, when that tax and government push more people into poverty ?

        • 106
          Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

          Our government and royalty is still set up as if it still has an Empire, pink everywhere.

          It needs sliming.

          • No mosks in North Wales says:

            Send them all to Queen Elizabeth Land.

          • Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

            with coats on

          • Inconvenient Truth for the Lefties says:

            The problem is that pink has darkened to red.

            Removing unnecessary and redundant government will correct the problem.

            It is true the government does not serve empire at present, but it does serve extortion.

          • Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

            Work for work sake in the civil service is a crime in this country. If adolf arrived, he would have put most of them against the wall.

          • Inconvenient Truth for the Lefties says:

            Work for works sake is the hallmark of socialism, and a symptom of an inefficient economy.

            If Godwin’s finest resurrected in the UK, he would actually be quite at home right now and would not touch anything.

            Save for possibly realizing that in order to continue to pay for the status quo it would be necessary to conquer and exploit foreigners.

      • 129
        VoteUkip says:

        Isn’t ‘a fair whack of taxes’ relative? For instance relative to the 13 years of Labour government, taxes on the rich are now much higher than they were. And as a direct result we have low/zero growth, even recession. Punishing success is always a stupid policy. It is hardly an incentive for businesses to grow and take on workers.

    • 111
      No mosks in North Wales says:

      Do first division footballers pay tax?

      • 119
        Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

        Are you joking? Have my own personal company, and whenever I phone HM inland revenue about paying tax, the attitude I get back is “Do you have to?”. Quite bizarre.

        • 142
          No mosks or sinnergogs in North Wales says:

          This Balotelli gentleman, he with the abomination of a Bentley, who seems to have been in some trouble lately. He and his ilk. Obscene amounts of money paid to them (why are they paid weekly? Do they get paid cash in a brown wage packet like we used to do every Thursday on the building sites?)
          Are they paying tax at the appropriate rate?
          We’ve heaped approbrium on TV presenters. Why not footballers?

    • 125
      Abdel from Tooting says:

      There is of course that Austrian School of thought which says that when faced with a financial crisis the Government should do absolutely nothing and let the people sort out the mess themselves .

      They tried it in Communist Russia a few years back and despite one or two hiccups it has not gone too bad because people with money are now queuing up to get in the country.

      • 131
        Inconvenient Truth for the Lefties says:


        Government involvement in economic crisis normally makes matters worst. In nearly all cases it pushes people into a position of dependency and leads to an expansion of government which exacerbates the original problem.

        Lower taxation attracts beneficial capital, particularly that which supports freedom. This attraction will crowd out the less beneficial forms of capital.

        Higher taxation has the opposite effect, and less beneficial capital is drawn into government.

        Taxation is proportional to size of government.

    • 154
      Inconvenient Truth for the Lefties says:

      This reinforces the point:

      Big Issue founder John Bird writes in Sun today how State social security has “created an under-class of people warehoused on benefits”

  29. 107
  30. 124
    The BBC wants to make its mind up says:

    Question : Why is it a “good” thing for pensioners earning £50k pa to lose/surrender “Winter Fuel Allowance” BUT a “bad” thing for those earning £50k pa to lose/surrender child benefit…??

    • 133
      Ah! ffs says:

      Well how many pensioners earning £50k pa work at the BBC and how many people work at the BBC earn £50k pa will lose child benefit, answers on a post card to BBC La La land, Hypocrites dept, can’t add up, Salford or Londonistan.

    • 135
      NUJ says:

      Because we said so!

    • 141
      Labour Bandwagonista says:

      The BBC is our propaganda wing.

    • 168
      Operation Crossbow says:

      Because most lesbians are on 50K a year at the BBC or local council and vote Labour, most pensioners are Tory scum and should be shot.


  31. 130

    I had lots of stink finger myself back in the 70′s

    better go and wash my hands

  32. 138
    Dave"The One Term Prime Minister" Cameron says:

    “Have you been using my razor to shave your minge?” I asked Samantha

    “No, but you might want to take a look at the blade on the strimmer”.she replied.

  33. 140
    Question Time from Londonistan says:

    • 214
      Handycock Immigrant Trafficker says:

      These people are racist and do not understand the importance of immigration to this country. It keeps wages down, house prices up and most importantly they vote for sitting MP’s because they don’t know any better, send ‘em to Portsmouth if London is full. Boaz

  34. 143
    Chris Patten says:

    License fee payers are not allowed to know what I do at the BBC, and for how many hours a week. Why should they, I’m far too superior.
    Now where is that belt, so I can give the wife a good beating.

  35. 144
    • 145
      BBC says:

      We changed that to ‘climate change’ years ago, you see it covers all eventualities.

      PS. Pay your TV tax!

    • 152
      BBC News says:

      We’re reporting on the heat wave and wiled fires crossing Australia at the moment, may be we’ll fit that story in at 3am tomorrow morning.

      • 172
        The BBC causes severe mental illness says:

        Reporting on wildfires and heatwave in a country which is 98% desert, and whilst it is in the middle of their summer is dumb, and we know it.

        BBC are also likely failing to report that wildfires are natural part of that eco-system and required by many species for reproduction, and the vegetation will be showing green shoots within about 2 weeks of the fire passing.

        If towns and cities are being affected, in the interests of balance, it would be worth mentioning that environmentalists preventing back burning and clearing of firebreaks is a serious hazard down there.

        The local fire watch describe the dead leaves and bark which builds up in bush as fuel for a reason, and with a decent breeze the fire can outrun a bulldozer easily, especially in valley regions.

        The BBC are f’tard propagandists and this broadcaster should be switched off. It is crap.

        • 205
          Naturalist says:

          The vast majority of Australian plant life is designed specifically to cope with fires. For example, the seed of all Eucalyptus species will not germinate unless it has been exposed to flame temperatures and the chemicals in woodsmoke. Same is true of many South African shrubs.
          The Eucalypts happily burn off their leaves and most of their bark before resprouting when the fires are out.

  36. 147
    Fat Bot on Healthy eating. LOL says:
  37. 148
    CCHQ Press Officer says:

    Quote of the year,so far,from Guido Fawkes

    Chancellor’s unfair child benefit changes “badly designed and not thought through”

  38. 151
    Dave "Butch" Cameron says:

    I was at a gay bar last night when the bartender asked me from over the counter.
    “Would you like a chapman?”

    “That’s the only reason I’d come to a gay bar really,” I replied.

  39. 155
    David Cameron says:

    Getting serious fucked off with Samantha. She wants me to buy gym membership with my beer money. Well, it ain’t happening – who needs a 6 pack when you’ve already got a barrel?

  40. 156
    Sobbing says:

    The voice of Listen With Mother, Daphne Oxenford, has died at 93. Another nail in civilisation’s coffin.

    • 183
      The good old days when English was spoken properly says:

      I used to listen to that with my Mother. Daphne Oxenford had a lovely voice.

  41. 159
    Michael Gove says:

    Dashing through the snow; get the fuck out of my way.

  42. 163
    Owen Jones says:

    Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!

    David Cameron ‏@David_Cameron
    At Royal Derby Hospital with piss artiste Guido Fawkes to see how Govt-backed nurse ward rounds have completely fucked up improving patient care.It’s so true,you just can’t trust the Tories with the NHS.

    Nice one,Dave !

  43. 164
    An Irish garlic smuggler says:

    Popped into Primark this morning to pick up a t-shirt my daughter had her eye on.

    “Excuse me.” I said at the till. “But any chance of a discount on this?”

    “I’m sorry sir, but I don’t think so.” The cashier replied. “it’s only a six quid item.”

    “Yes, but it’s soiled.” I explained. “There’s a big black stain on the front.”

    “That’s Rihanna’s face, sir.”

    • 173
      Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

      Went into Aldis this morning, for some spuds – two for a pand they said. Said I’d give them 75 pence, and they dashed me off. The capitalist Fascists!

  44. 166
    Operation Crossbow says:

    So at least we know how Labour are going to employ all those long term unemployed.

    500,000 Frosties denial and diversity officers all on 50K a year natch.

    I also just love how the BBC spouted all this shit with a serious face and even gave us ‘experts’ to back Liebore up.

    What next the banning of lace up shoes?

    We can ban Frosties but the USA can’t ban machine guns!

  45. 167
    Owen Jones says:

    The Tories are the scum of the earth !

    Caring Tory councillor who slammed food banks works as a stockbroker http://politicalscrapbook.net/2013/01/tory-councillor-who-slammed-food-banks-works-as-stockbroker-chris-steward/

    • 171
      Knob Jockey says:

      • 181
        Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

        Like the way Andrew jock knobbreath tries to divert from the simple fact that there ARE 23 millionaires in the tory cabinet. He must have thought it not important to the rest of us plebs, maybe because the jock knobreath is one as well, the haggis fanny arse.

    • 180
      nellnewman says:

      Explain why in this society of universal benefits we need food banks.

      Unless of course people receiving benefits are spending those benefits on non-essentials rather than food first.

    • 182
      tourmaline says:

      Explain why in this land of universal benefits we need food banks.

      Unless of course those receiving the benefits are spending them on non-essentials rather than food first

      • 188
        Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

        Grow up – we live in a fashion conscious capitalist country. Food comes second, always.

        • 193
          tourmaline says:

          I don’t think fashion has anything to do with it. Suspect those benefits are going to drugs and drink. Never mind feeding and clothing the children.

          • Merseysider says:

            And ciggies, don’t forget the ciggies.

          • Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

            mobile phones and the tinternet and sky telly is a fashion, and the latest pair of daps. Food comes after them.

          • Living in 96.98 percent white Merseyside says:

            I buy my ciggies these days in packs of five 20′s just in case I forget. It grieves me though to think the Government is getting 80% back in duty.
            Good job I can afford them with all my benefits and pensions.

  46. 169
    Sir William says:

    We three kings of Orient are
    Saudi Arabia, Dubai and Qatar
    We are the gaffers, you lazy Kafrs
    Who do you think you are?

    • 177
      Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

      White genetic mutated defects?

      • 233
        not sure says:

        Haven’t they built a towering islamic symbol in Londonistan.
        The Shard,overseeing our pathetic country and symbolising dominance
        over the land????…..

  47. 175
    US Watch says:

    Looks like the US would prefer armed guards in schools over trashing the 2nd amendment:


    It is curious though that the armed guards will not protect from the most damaging effect of public (state) education, that being what is taught.

    Home and community schooling is still increasing, and the statistics relating to academic success of children who do not attend the state schools places them at a higher ranking than state educated peers. Interesting that.

    • 207
      NAIS says:

      And don’t forget we have a thriving fee paying independent sector where most of the middle class children go. Not that we have any different classes in America you understand.

    • 223
      Anonymous says:

      that is interesting.
      perhaps it always goes back to the saying know thyself. we are then a better judge of the needs of the child and should we then wish improve their lives.

      do we need to go collective to balance the pull of the state towards global uniformity? Friends, neighbours a better judge than the state.

  48. 176
    Owen Jones says:

    Ha! Ha! Ha!

    Only 1 parents has already opted out of receiving child benefit, ahead of changes coming into force on Monday, the Treasury confirms.

    The Tories are the laughing stock of the world !

    • 178
      Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

      beeb says hundreds of thousands, but that is the beeb for you – the tory foghorn propaganda british brainwashing broadcasting service, that couldn’t manage to get a tory majority government in last general election.


      Don’t look into their eyes, whatever you do, is my simple advice.

      • 179
        Owen Jones says:

        Deep. Reaffirms the hegemony of what Hegel called ‘the bricklayer’s paradigm’. What lies within our own gap between slabs?

        • 184
          Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

          Bricklaying? Flemish bond? As per Brussels?

        • 189
          The good old days when English was spoken properly says:

          You two bolshis can kiss my well educated, white, patriotic arse!

          • Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

            prefer to fuck it – you know you want me to.

    • 186
      Casual Observer says:

      I do not see any benefit in having you as a child.

  49. 185
    tourmaline says:

    Is anybody sure edmilitwit is still in existence?

    I did hear 2ndhand yesterday that he wanted to fleece pensioners to keep paying welfare benefit folks and also wanted a law to stop us eating sugar fat and salt, but he hasn’t been seen in the flesh for yonks.

    • 199
      a non says:

      Probably in a private clinic.
      With all the talk of UK obesity he got the idea to experiment with a nasal band.
      I await great thsings at the next PMQs.

    • 217
      RetardEd says:

      I am really enjoying myself at the Trekkie convention in Southport.

      • 222
        Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

        What are you, actually, saying?

  50. 187
    Lefties take over the RSPCA says:
    • 190
      Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

      GOOD GAWD! The RSPCA is the most fascist institution in the country. I have met quite a few of them, and they make the stasi look like amateurs. They are seriously hard work, and do need an attitude adjustment, desperately.

      • 203
        The good old days when English was spoken properly says:

        OMG Morning Star, I actually agree with you 100% re: the RSPCA!

        When my next door neighbour died suddenly, I ‘phoned the RSPCA & explained that he had a dog that was now ownerless. They couldn’t have given a shit & were so nonchalent I slammed the ‘phone down in disgust.

        Two weeks later, a representative of the RSPCA knocked at my door, asking for a donation. I told him to F8CK OFF!

        • 211
          Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

          HELLO! – didn’t we both discuss this on Ali Cambells blog a few months ago? Our comments are exactly the same.

    • 191
      tourmaline says:

      In truth the RSPCA has always been a wasteful leftwing political ‘charity’. On principal I never give to it.

      It has £millions salted away that it never uses. Occupies fancy offices and pays fancy top end salaries to it ‘executives’. The Charity Commission in reality should take away it charitable status.

      • 212
        Morning Star with russian bras, sometimes more than often off says:

        RSPCA leftwing??? It’s in the name – it is a right wing organisation to keep us from complaining about how righties treat their horses. When was the last time you heard a tory being done for horse cruelty? Ey? Yes, never. But they give basic farmers a hell of a hard time.

        Anyway, the RSPCA is run by masons, so that should simply explain everything.

    • 201
      Animal Rights is not Animal welfare. says:

      It’s a great shame really. I know a couple of RSPCA inspectors and local care centre staff. These people are apolitical and work for the society because they care about animal welfare, they are being badly let down by a leadership with a strong political agenda.

      I also know several members of the local hunt and you could not find people more dedicated to wildlife and pets. The Lefties blindly think because someone hunts, they do not respect animals, they could not be further from the truth.

      • 219
        Casual Observer says:

        While humans remain the apex predators, other animals do not really have any ‘right’.

        • 224
          Sir William says:

          Jeremy Bentham had a more sensible basis for not being cruel to animals. It wasn’t necssary for animals to have rights, merely for them to have the capacity to suffer. It’s not a matter of ‘animal rights’ but of human duties.

          • Casual Observer says:

            Framing the issue in terms of moral responsibility and a preference not to harm is much more enlightened than attempting to project a notion of right.

            I guess this is what happens when the loony left infiltrates and otherwise honorable organization. A pattern seen repeated over and over in ‘modern’ Britain.

          • Ban All Bran - it is an offense to toilet pans says:

            Love the way foxes get used for political means by the tories and the SE Landahn beeb, fooling themselves that they are in touch with countryside nature. And don’t get me started on Julia Bradbury and that Countrypiedophile programme on the beeb, please.

    • 221
      I'll say no more says:

      • 251
        Ban All Bran - it is an offense to toilet pans says:

        Used to fill in at the kosher deli counter in Southgate tesscies when I was in uni. And I look as j as Nelson Mandela. Sales of herring rollmops went right up, the manager said.

  51. 209
    • 220
      US Watch says:

      They’re just irritated that Gore walked off with $100m after screwing the planet over with failed Kyoto, and messing up energy policy in the US.

      Qatar is heavily into gas fracking and have signed a lot of contracts to develop tech and distribute US –> China over next few years. The purchase is a smart move for Qatar, and irrespective of Al Jazz branded transmissions, it will be used as a platform to re-balance the perception of gas fracking in the public mind.

      The US is still very confused about the ‘religion of peace’.

  52. 218
    Owen Jones says:

    Government spends £5.8m on NHS consultancy firms – many of whom help out Tories http://ow.ly/gz83s

  53. 226
    Climate Watch says:

    This is what incontrovertible means:


    Just in case any moron tries to convince you that evidence for climate change is ‘incontrovertible’.

  54. 235
    No mosks or sinnergogs in North Wales says:

    I’m really only interested in the weather in my garden

  55. 237
    A Pleb, with delusions of grandeur. says:

    Can I just say that the current “Seen Elsewhere” section is the most enjoyable I’ve known?

    RSPCA, Guardian (twice), Political Scrapbook, New Statesman Camden Council, E.U. and 800 cops raked over the coals. And Owen Jones having a strop. And Diane Abbott attacking feminism.

    Keep up the good work.


  56. 239
    unemployed and skint in Birtley Colliery says:

    I have just read in the Guardian that University Vice Chancellors are up in arms because funding is being pulled for a lot of their postgraduate Masters Courses.

    According to these guys loads of people will not be able to continue with their careers because they will not be able to pay the course fees as post graduate qualifications are compulsory now for so many jobs .

    I am really crying on my cocoa.

    I have a mate who got an interview with Google and all he had was three A Levels . At the interview they asked him to explain how he would get a toy ship out of a bottle without breaking it.

    He got the job and started last month on 50k.

    The only problem is he has to live in Singapore.

    Thank Christ we have loads of Vice Chancellors up and down the country.

    • 242
      Hey DC how many jobs have you created today says:

      Two years ago I graduated from the University of Sunderland with a joint Honours degree in the history of Monkwearmouth Colliery and Applied Welding.

      I have not had a sniff of a job since.

      Last year I started getting letters about my Student Loan . The loan Company wanted to know how I was getting on . When I told them they asked if I could send them some money so I sent them 50p in a prepaid envelope they had sent me.

      Last week I visited Sunderland County Court and made myself bankrupt.

      I hope this helps people.

    • 249
      Ban All Bran - it is an offense to toilet pans says:

      Branson can’t even read, but he is a ballionair.

Seen Elsewhere

Cocaine Conservatives | Standard
Jezza Browne Responds to LibDem Haters | LibDem Voice
Why Britain Needs to Leave the EU | Douglas Carswell
Literally No One is Watching London Live | MediaGuido
Who Tells Ed When He’s Wrong? | Speccie
Hands Off Our Cojones, Mr Clegg | Laura Perrins
London Live Averaging Just 2,400 Viewers | Forbes
Ed’s Constitutional Failure | ConHome
UKIP Poster Girl’s Naked Photos | Sun
Miliband’s Radical Old Labour Agenda | Fraser Nelson
Meet Team Miliband | Dan Hodges

Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

A confused Nick Griffin says Nigel Farage is a shill for the City, forgetting that City banks want to stay in the EU:

“Farage is a snake oil salesman, but a very good one. His supposed anti-immigration stance is all smoke and mirrors, as is his carefully cultivated image as a ‘man of the people’. The truth is that UKIP is a pro-immigration party that exists to lobby for the interests of the City of London.”

Nick Clegg says:

Do you want lies with that?

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