October 11th, 2012

Two-Faced Chuka: International Edition

It’s a double instalment of two-faced Chuka today. Last week Chuka played up his man of the people credentials in Manchester his way around Manchester before wooing executives from BAE and EADS. At the time he said he emphasised how he wanted to “reassure” them he had an “open mind”. Now the deal has fallen through the MP for Streatham and Shadow Minister for Arms Dealers is attacking it. At least we know who he puts first.

Meanwhile Chuka has been on a junket to Israel this week, but that’s not how he’s spinning it. Guido’s eyes and ears on the trip get in touch to shed some light:

“How they can call it a delegation to Israel and Palestine is beyond me; the Pali meetings were an ad hoc addition.”

Trying to have it both ways will always backfire Chuka…


  1. 1
    Dick the Prick says:

    Has the sub-ed started lunch early?

  2. 2
    Chuka Urmunneyaround says:

    This was always a One Nation visit.

  3. 3
    The public says:


  4. 4
    Anonymous says:

    Last week Major told us the country had turned the corner.
    Yesterday Comedy Dave told us things were going to get worse.

    They haven’t a clue

    • 8
      Gordon Brown says:

      Borrow more money. Print more money. Pay the public sector more and create more ‘growth’.

      • 13
        UKIP.i.am.awake says:

        It worked for Greece and Spain.

        • 21
          Gordon Brown says:

          It will. They just need to borrow enough, spend enough and pay the public sector workers enough. It’s only not working at present because they’re not borrowing enough, printing enough and paying the public sector workers enough. They could solve their unemployment issues by creating more public sector jobs as well.

          This is the blueprint I used for the UK and it’s been a huge economic success.

          [Finishes speech, sits down and collects cheque for 'charity']

      • 23

        He didn’t say where the corner lead to though? Just asking.

        Gizza job.

    • 11
      UKIP.i.am.awake says:

      He also told us he ate babies for breakfast no doubt.

    • 12
      Chris 'they'll be a welcome in the anus' Bryant says:

      Come on TaT – must try harder, like your momma does with her strap-on, m’kay?

  5. 5
    jgm2 says:

    His star must be in the ascendant if the Is*rae*lis are inviting him over on a ‘fact-finding’ trip.

    • 10
      Mornington Crescent says:

      Did he take his girlfriend Miss Berger with him…? Just asking.

    • 19
      Gonk says:

      Potential honey trap opportunity

      • 24
        jgm2 says:

        Hotel bugged to record what he really thinks about Isr*ae*l in those unguarded moments. That way Mos*sad know whether they need to destroy his career or not.

        • 36
          Anonymous says:

          I don’t think Isr*ae*l need have any fear of Chuka whatever he thinks of them. He will in due course destroy his career by his own actions if his current performance is any guide.

      • 33
        MC Chukky says:

        Yo mean da bitches would tell me da secrets, show me da secrets, let me in da secret places!

        I like da garage moosic, innit. Suck ma teef!

  6. 6
    Gonk says:

    Run with the hare and hunt with hounds.

  7. 14
    Religion: The Original Sin says:

    Every newborn baby in Scotland will receive a classical CD to inspire a love of music.

    No doubt the B side will inform ‘baby’ how to claim benefits.

    • 30
      Loungelizard says:

      Every newborn baby in Scotland will receive a copy of Braveheart and the right to vote SNP.

  8. 16
    Eh? says:

    “people credentials in Manchester his way around Manchester”

  9. 17
    Friend of Andrew Mitchell says:

    We’re all free loaders, it’s only public money anyway!!

  10. 25
    Religion: The Original Sin says:

    Does he spend as much time as Obama applying the dark make-up each morning?

  11. 26
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Sums it all up as to what Chuka is all about, to all those who wonder why Guido keeps up all the coverage on him:

  12. 27
    Chucky says:

    Free Constance! She me sistah! Free da Briscoe 1!

  13. 28
    Religion: The Original Sin says:

    Greece are losing their bottle:

    Greece’s biggest company is leaving the country, drinks bottler Coca Cola Hellenic says it is moving to Switzerland -

    • 39
      The savant says:

      Makes sense …

      That s where they ve. Probably channelled all their off. Balance sheet profits …

      Either. Zug. Or the great state of Delaware .

  14. 29
    British MPs 4 British voters. says:

    Chuka is a bad influence. A ganja smoking product of the Oirish and the dark continent wrapped up in a tax shelter.

  15. 31
    Voter says:

    “Total crap read from an idiot board.” What a knobhead we have for a PM.

  16. 37
    keredybretsa says:

    Can’t burn a candle from both ends. Well you can but don’t half hurt!

  17. 41
    Anonymous says:

    Anyone else think Chuka is an odious little sh*t with as much debating strength of a lower 6th pimply faced ar**hole. If he is the future of labour I think I’ll slit my wrists now.

  18. 42
    Chukka-yer-moni-down-the-pan says:


Seen Elsewhere

Guido’s Column | Sun
NUT’s Loony Defence of Status Quo | Jago Pearson
A Dozen Reasons to Be Cheerful | John McTernan
Political Bloggers Are Equal Opportunities Attackers | ConHome
Michael Gove Should Resign | Conservative Women
Sarah Wollaston’s Naming and Shaming of Bloggers | LibDemVoice
Fraser Nelson: Put Your Money on Ed Miliband to Win | Guardian
Guido Fawkes is Too Aggressive | The Times
Ditch Tobacco Plain Packaging | Grassroots Conservatives
What Farage, Boris and Rob Ford Have in Common | William Walter
Labour Spell New Adviser’s Name Wrong | ITV

Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

Rod Liddle on the loony UN sexism special rapporteur:

“There is more sexism in Britain than in any other country in the world, according to a mad woman who has been sent here by the United Nations.

Rashida Manjoo is a part-time professor of law at Cape Town University in the totally non-sexist country of South Africa (otherwise known as Rape Capital Of The World).

Mrs Magoo has been wandering around with her notebook and is appalled by the sexist “boys’ club” culture here, apparently.

I don’t doubt we still have sexism in the UK. But is it worse than in, say, Saudi Arabia, d’you think, honey-lamb? Or about 175 other countries? Get a grip, you doolally old bat.”

orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?

Tip off Guido
Web Guido's Archives

Subscribe me to:


AddThis Feed Button

Guido Reads