October 3rd, 2012

Guardian Hits Hungry Hacks With Price Hike

Troubling times for the children of Kings Place, the pain is being inflicted at the bottom not the top. Not only are swathes of hacks getting the chop, prices are being hiked for the hungry piggies in the staff canteen as the subsidy on food and drink is removed. Writing to all staff, John Cornby, the Guardian’s Finance Director claims to “appreciate these changes come at a time when pockets are being squeezed” – the move will save the troubled paper £200,000 – on the plus side “healthy options such as muesli and toast will be served in the restaurant as usual”.

£200,000 is around a third of the editor’s pay package…


  1. 1
    Kebab Time says:

    You would have to have a heart of stone not to chuckle.


  2. 2
    Davey boy says:

    But they are all in it together


    • 8
      Lord Stansted says:

      Trouble is they’ll not sink together. When the Guardian goes under, all the hacks and hackettes will move over to the BBC. Christ, half of the bastards are there already.


      • 33
        lojolondon says:

        Yes, but then they won’t be able to quote each other as ‘independent’ or a voice of reason.

        The good thing is that anyone who has ‘Guardian’ on their CV is forever blackened in my eyes, and will never be worth anything.


    • 21
      Kelvin Rusbridger says:

      It’s nothing to do with me.


    • 53
      G Brown lover of Prudence says:

      Millionaire Ed expecting £40,000 courtesy of “Call me Dave”. Alright for some.


  3. 3
    One Nation - my arse says:

    I am absolutely devastated about the Granaud feeling the pinch……..devastated [tee hee]……….devastated [ha ha ha].

    We’ll have to have a whip round fir the poor sods!


    • 5
      One Nation - my arse says:

      *for* [sorry, I was so upset that I couldn’t see for tears shedding down the screen].


      • 14
        Dr Nuts says:

        Pity its doesn’t act on its own espoused political agenda, take the hacks round the back and shoot them!
        You’re now unnecessary for the greater good.

        Can we find a suitable Gulag?


        • 24

          Could Eric Hobsbawm have been the mystery Soviet recruiter of the Cambridge Five spy ring, I wonder? Maybe a bit young – but not impossible.


          • Pawn Sandwich says:

            Someone snitched on him.


          • Dr Nuts says:

            There are plenty of options that there may have been more than the Cambridge 5. The facts that remain is that 4 were discovered, and the other members (if any) are not going to come forward and admit treason. There is no golden rule that states there was only 5.
            This is a favourite pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey for adults!

            We should have winkled out people like Hobsbawm and given him a free permanent holiday to Russia, easy to be an apologist for Stalin, would soon change tune when a victim.

            Likewise Miliband Sr.


          • There are plenty of options for sure. But at that level the spymaster would have to have had an unshakeable belief in the system, which Hobsbawm clearly had, and the force of personality to accomplish this over other highly opinionated intellectuals, not so sure on that one. Kimberley Cornish claims it was Ludwig Wittgenstein, who would certainly meet the second criterion. I do not see him regarding the Bolsheviks as perfect but we know he had to compromise with the Nazis over his sisters so I do not see it as impossible either.


          • Dr Nuts says:

            John Cairncross is widely suspected of being a fifth man, he was identified as a spy in the 1990s, but the issue of indoctrination.

            I wonder how many Hobsbawm quietly established since. If Hobsbawm did convert the 5 it really was almost as soon as he got there, which is either very difficult because he should’ve been monitored given his background, or very easy because he was otherwise an ‘unidentified’ radical and there was no watch on his activities.

            I agree it would’ve been almost as soon as he got the job at Cambridge if at all.


          • Another Bletchley Park man. The one that passed the information which decided the Eastern Front. (Or alternatively, Hitler simply repeated his hero Napoleon’s error.)


          • Alec Guinness says:

            Interesting point mog!


  4. 4
    Not Billy says:

    Pork chops all round.


  5. 6
    whippersnapper2 says:

    Where are those pesky bailiffs when you need them ?


  6. 7
    One Nation - my arse says:

    Milibandwagon answering pre-scripted questions from the ‘tards at their conference. What a soddin farce!


  7. 9
    A Guardian Socialist says:

    Price rises in the subsidised staff canteen? This is outrageous. i shall be cancelling my subscription immediately in solidarity with the workers.


  8. 10
    Quiet Bat Person says:

    From Guido’s Media Reader:

    ‘MP Calls for Inquiry Into Savile Row’ – Guardian

    The Government should investigate traditional men’s bespoke tailoring?


  9. 13
    Baroness Warsi says:

    Does their staff canteen serve Halal food ?


    • 30
      Diane Fatbutt says:

      Vegetarian lamb korma, your Ladyshit.

      Also free B and B for your researcher for an additional fee.


  10. 15
    Polly Toynbee says:

    200k is Chicken feed for me, I won’t be going on rations for writing my shit.


    • 31
      Diane Fatbutt says:

      Judging by your neck, you’ve been gobbling too much turkey.


    • 63
      JH says:

      Thinking about it, what will poor Polly do if there are no more subsidised lefty vanity sheets around to pay her to shit out Gramsciian drivel?

      I fear for her privileges. Those Tuscan pool boys cost money.


  11. 16
    Pawn Sandwich says:

    Would a FOI into BBC employees with a history of Guardian employment be entertained?

    As the Guardian has about 2.6% of the national circulation then surely this figure should be representative of BBC employees who have dead tree press experience.

    Or do I stand more chance of winning the Euromillions jackpot?


  12. 17
    A Thoughtful Piggy says:

    Why not have a whip round ??


  13. 19
    Postal Vote says:

    After next elections, Labour government will advertise lots of non-jobs in the paper, as it did when previously in government, to bribe the paper to write positively about everything labour, which then gets echoed on the beeb, obviously!


  14. 20
    Tim W says:

    Just a tiny part of me is moist with sympathy.


  15. 22
    ToonBob... says:

    Perhaps the BBC should buy more copies….. ?


  16. 25
    Anon & Anon says:

    See that a certain supermarket who’s name begins with “T***o” has posted

    a large drop in profits today, is this just because ZanuLieLabor are no

    longer in power as they were & still are I understand, strong supporters of

    McMental & Co


  17. 34
    Gordon Brown says:

    This evening I am re-designing the walnut whip


  18. 37
    Not connected to Edinburgh socialist dogshit says:

    No doubt the heavily subsidised BBC will subsidise them.


  19. 39
    Brown out and pay me damages says:



  20. 41
    Sophie says:

    The slow demise of that hateful rag is delicious.

    I have a special bottle in the cellar waiting for the inevitable happy news.


  21. 46

    Why does the Guardian outsource its cleaning staff?
    If it kept them in house it could easily pay them now, without waiting for legislation, the £17ph living wage its always banging on about.

    But by hiring an evil profit making company, which does not have the best interests of the lowest paid in society at heart, it is prolonging and aiding the capitalist economy and punishing the most vulnerable and most ethnically vulnerable too!


    • 51
      Yeah, right... says:

      Pretty radical stuff Bill. Hell, if we are going to start thinking outside the box like that, maybe we could go all the way and stop using esoteric offshore vehicles to avoid tax.

      Just an idea.


    • 62
      Champagne Socialist Hogsbottom says:

      Bourgeois scum. We socialist intellectuals know best – do as you’re bloody told.


    • 66
      Eric Hobsbawm says:

      You sound like one of those suburban petit bourgeoisie I hate so much.

      Mind you, I look like a fucking Orc.

      And I’m dead.

      Has anyone bought any of my books yet? Come on, I’m dead now. The BBC and the Guardian have plugged me to buggery, so get down Waterstones you ungrateful little falsely concious fuckers.

      Doubtless my delightful Hobs-spawn will be fighting like cats in a sack over my considerable estate. You don’t want them going short, do you?


  22. 50
    Polly Toynbee says:

    It’s a disgrace that they’re going to take away the subsidy and make me pay full price for my prosciutto crudo ciabatta!

    Don’t they understand that subsidizing things is how our world works?

    Don’t they read any of my articles?


  23. 68
    Mr Sidney Goldbars of East Cheam says:

    Please help is there any truth in the rumour that Jonah McMental has been

    advising Armadinnerjacket on value of the Rial ???

    Needless to say the Jonah effect is now in full swing with Rial plunging in

    value against US$ every hour……….wonder why ????? LOL LOL LOL


  24. 69
    Polly Kettle-On says:

    Damn! Who will pay for my caviar-on-toast?


  25. 70
    Lizzie says:

    Let them eat cake!


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