September 5th, 2012

Claire Perry’s Porno Problem

When she isn’t speculating that Kate Middleton might be up the duff or suggesting that girls should be spared from prison, it seems Claire Perry has porn on the mind. But the Tory MP’s campaign to control what we can and can’t watch on our computer screens was laid bare today after its dodgy stats were rumbled. SafetyNet claim that one in three ten-year-olds have viewed online porn. It turns out they lifted the figure from an obscure magazine, which has admitted using a sample of 14-16 year-olds from just one school in north London. So in other words her figures are about as academic as a show of hands in a pub. Maybe Perry should spend less time worrying why all her sucking up failed to land her a job, and a bit more time on the facts. 


72 Comments

  1. 1
    Spinal Damage says:

    What a silly cow.

  2. 2
    Kebab Time says:

    I saw this debate going on other day, where is the parents role in this ( blocking) , if parents spent quality time with their offspring then no need to worry.

  3. 3
    Geo says:

    MP = frustrated dictator

  4. 4
    AC1 says:

    Children under two years old are seeing breasts close up several times a day!

    Something must be done.

  5. 5
    Hopeful voter says:

    Never let the truth get in the way of a political career.

  6. 6
    Butch Cameron and Cleggy the Cocksucker Kid says:

    Totty? You’ve come to the right man! Me, Cleggy and our fellow butch colleagues in Cabinet like nothing better than tupping birds!

    – that’ll put an end to these vile rumours of a cabal of blackmailed bum boys running the country!

  7. 7
    jolly hockey sticks says:

    sucking off might have got her a promotion.

  8. 8
    Michael Fabricant says:

    Would you?

  9. 9
    72 virgins says:

    I googled her image to see if I could find some milfy pics, and this http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2012/07/04/article-2168480-0F5864AD00000578-982_233x423.jpg came up.

  10. 10
    David Laws says:

    Worked for me.

  11. 11
    alexsandr says:

    Thanks. i was eating :(

  12. 12
    Butch Cameron says:

    One in three ten year olds think Gideon is an excellent Chancellor, and Europe is wholly to blame for holding the United Kingdom’s economy back from leading the world out of this temporary, now in its sixth year, credit crunch blip, not interminable depression, and all bankers everywhere are innocent and lovely! – according to George’s super-duper survey!

  13. 13
    Backdoor Billy says:

    Watch it or i’ll give you some rough trade

  14. 14
    alexsandr says:

    it is parents responsibility to stop their kids seeing inappropriate material, same as seeing unsuitable films and games.
    There is software available to filter internet, people like net-nanny.
    and even if there is filtering, parents should still monitor their kids computers cos kids can often bypass filters etc – they are not daft.
    This idea 13 year olds need laptops in their bedroom needs debunking. Computers should be in the family space so they can be monitored.

    Anyway, filtering at home is probably useless cos they will go to a friends house where there is no filtering. Or on their friends unfiltered mobile.

  15. 15
    Backdoor Boy says:

    Watch it or i’ll give you some rough trade ducky

  16. 16
    jgm2 says:

    Ten out of ten Labour MPs did nothing while the Maximum Imbecile destroyed the UK economy. Which would be just about understandable since they are such stupid, tribal jackasses that they probably did believe the Maximum Imbeciles insane ramblings. What is far more incredible is that now, even after the fact, they still cannot bring themselves to admit what happened.

    It’s like that TV a*d they used to run ‘Think Bike!’ You know, the one where you’re in a c*ar, at a junction, looking left, looking right then you pull out and ‘Wallop’, you smashed into a mo*tor-cyclist. Fuck! ‘Now you see him’ it said. Then they’d run the a*d slower and, fuck me, there he was all along.

    Labour MPs and bedwetters are watching the slowed down version and still giving it ‘Sorry mate. I didn’t see you there’.

  17. 17
    I don't need no doctor says:

    That’s some tan Claire got on holiday.

  18. 18
    Lord Scalded Bollock says:

    I always show my hands in a pub.

    Damn sight cheaper than putting my hands in my pocket to buy a round.

  19. 19
    110% of the Great British Public know Cameron and his Cabal are Fags says:

    Guido, us little persons were wondering if Mr Cameron with all his talk of ‘butch’, might not secretly be a bit of a bender on the quiet. What are your views on this matter?

  20. 20
    Pentangelis says:

    Never heard of her. Need to say any more?

  21. 21
    Simplicimus says:

    I would.

  22. 22
    SP4BS says:

    you know that bit where Cameron used the word “twat”, and then said he didn’t know what it meant.

    Well I rekon the advisor blokes who write the sound bites for cameron to use are stuffing these things in for a bet. They still owe pints to the Labour lot who managed to get Gordon to smile on camera.

  23. 23
    Little Ed says:

    Thame old faeces on the Oppothithion fwont bench.

  24. 24
    HenryV says:

    You may have something there. Take away the monitor and they can’t see anything.

  25. 25
    SP4BS says:

    I’m jealous, the buffet must have been something else.

  26. 26
    HenryV says:

    That’s what you meant by monitored isn’t it? No?

  27. 27
    Dobbie says:

    Has Hairy Whitemouse come back to haunt us?

  28. 28
    Buzzword Bingo says:

    “should be in the family space”

    Kerrching!

  29. 29
    SP4BS says:

    (I’m going to have to preface this – its not about tory-bashing its about whether the opposition was acting effectively at the time)

    I can’t really remember the opposition at the time shouting much. I vaguely remember them on and on about stealth taxes and about how stamp duty bands needed changing, and Dave was on about inheritance tax going up to 1 million.

  30. 30
    Butch Cameron says:

    To prove once and for all that George and I are NOT transparent arse bandits I give you this photo as categorical proof:

  31. 31

    As her constituent, and a parent at the same school, I would urge her to focus just a little more on her constituency.

  32. 32
    I like Butch says:

  33. 33
    David Cameltoe says:

    I can call anybody “butch” or not, as I please– I have read the handbook, written by Butch himself, as to what is/n’t “butch.” And anyway, yo momma don’t call me no fag, punk!

  34. 34
    Johnny Short-Todger says:

    Phwooooooooarrrrrr!!!!! If I had a big enough penis I’d tap that ass!

  35. 35
    jgm2 says:

    Every budget day until Cameron was elected T*ry leader the Maximum Imbecile would get up and brag about his ‘miracle’ economy and round off by proclaiming that this year he would ‘only’ borrow 35bn quid. For prudent reasons you understand. And not simply to pay the one million bedwetters he employed in 2001. Fuck no. For ‘investment’.

    Then the T*ry shadow would get up and have a go at him for all the reckless borrowing.

    Three election defeats later and the T*ries decided that the voters didn’t want to be told that all Brown’s borrowing was reckless. They liked the illusion of borrowed wealth. So Cameron pledged to match the madness. And all this at about the same time that RBS and HBoS were holding emergency talks with Mervyn. No wonder Brown looked so smug when it all went to shit.

    Ten years of warning that Brown was insane and borrowing when he should be saving and just when they’re about to be proven right… they change the message.

  36. 36
    72 virgins says:

    I hope it was r1ce and p3as.

  37. 37
    Geo says:

    give her a ball gag to keep her quiet and yes, I would

  38. 38
    ShepshedRichTea says:

    this was discussed on PM yesterday where she was trashed by another interviewer concerning this survey.

  39. 39
    SP4BS says:

    I do vaguely remember Brown saying that everything would be payed for with “future growth”.

    On the other hand of course, most people just want to know what happens with fag, beer, and petrol taxes, then turn off.

  40. 40
    ed martin says:

    a ‘sucking up failure’ (your expression) – have we a nautical typo here?

  41. 41
    robbie says:

    No relation to Katy Perry?

  42. 42
    Knob jockey says:

    Brokeback mountain here we come.

  43. 43

    That wasn’t a smile, that was wind.

  44. 44
    Drop a daisy cutter on the BBC says:

    She could get her tits out.

  45. 45
    Forkbender says:

    One does not say,”speculating that Kate Middleton might be up the duff ” one says Katherine Windsor, the Pricess of Wales, is expecting the birth of an heir to the throne, it is really common to to refer to her as being “up the duff”, that expression is how one describes the lower orders

  46. 46
    Forkbender says:

    We’ll all pull together

  47. 47
    Forkbender says:

    Just switch off the router

  48. 48
    Forkbender says:

    Have Cleggie and the other one had some of the funny stuff, Dave is not that amusing

  49. 49
    Forkbender says:

    Keep your prize possession in your trousers

  50. 50
    Just checking says:

    Guido,

    Didn’t you go to school in North London?

  51. 51
    the savant says:

    ok look let s put this one “to bed “.

    warsi and mensch have gone from totty watch but hey these two new bints are nt that bad ….
    maria miller and that truss bird .

    i would nt kick either of them out of bed …. in fact i ll accomodate them simultaneously no problem …. always gone for the older directoire knickers type … i find they re so grateful .

  52. 52
    Kinnochio says:

    Dave’s eco friendly Tories believe in “climate science” too. The only way Dave would make anyone cry would crying wiht laughter at his aping of Bliar

  53. 53
    Louise Mensch says:

    The truth is, I am a big fat ugly lezza in a thin suit.

    That’s why I jumped before I was pushed.

    Lezzas are not welcome in Corby, especially ugly fat ones, and so I have now sought political asylum in the United States.

  54. 54
    Mary White says:

    The vociferous women involved in this all seem a bit too strident and there is a lot of emotional blackmail, with Miranda Suit, co-founder of SaferMedia, claiming it is a public health issue as children are being harmed.

    “I am very angry, both at the harm being perpetrated by pornography, and the fact it is far worse than realised.”

    “Dismissing the view that government was powerless to act, Miranda Suit pointed out that the Chinese government had demonstrated quite the opposite during the Olympics. Given the scale of the threat to society, arguments about freedom of speech and “artistic expression” were now outdated.”

    “John Carr, a United Kingdom government adviser on Internet safety policy for children and Secretary of the UK’s Children’s Charities’ Coalition on Internet Safety, highlighted the US First Amendment as possibly the greatest obstacle faced by those wishing to clean up the internet.”

    Interesting models for us there. Authoritarian communist single party state China which represses and criminals domestic dissent and the idea that freedom of speech and artistic expression is “outdated”. And the mask slipping with the vociferous and prolific John Carr who reveals this is not really about access at all but about “cleaning up the internet” with the First Amendment seen as an “obstacle” rather than a protection.

  55. 55
    jgm2 says:

    Kate’s the Duchess of Cambridge. Not the Princess of Wales.

  56. 56
    Anonymous says:

    “So in other words her figures are about as academic as a show of hands in a pub”

    She should join Gove at the DfE. She’d be right at home.

  57. 57
    Anonymous says:

    same old joke

    still not funny

  58. 58
    Handycock (Teen Fondler) says:

    Hear hear, that is why I told Nick Clegg to back the failed 20mph speed limit which I imposed in Portsmouth, and he fell for it the stupid twat. It is not the policies that count but the perception of them and the personal political glory gained from this perception. Boaz.

  59. 59
    SaltPetre says:

    I bet she has a nice hairy growler.

  60. 60
    MB. says:

    Reminds me of years ago when the fashion was to worry about children watching porn videos. One survey gave children lists of names of porn videos so they could tick off those they had seen. They ticked as many fictitious titles as real ones.

  61. 61
    Big Momma says:

    Oh I don’t know, maybe she is on a form of gender bender herself as the “price” of it could explain Pricess or perhaps Katy Price?

  62. 62
    Big Momma says:

    alexsandr must be a politician as he comes up with all the negatives but no solution. Hmmm

  63. 63
    Big Momma says:

    Calm down dear.

  64. 64
    Pundit too too says:

    Depends on the pub. Some of them do serve academics, analysts, and other number crunchers you know.

  65. 65
    Left wing Socialist fuckwit says:

    Hilarious weally and thoe twue

  66. 66
    giant gonad says:

    Of the Mensch school of the completely useless.

  67. 67
    alexsandr says:

    the solution is for parents to look after their own kids, not the nanny state.

  68. 68
    Anonymous says:

    Take it up with Greedo.

  69. 69
    Anonymous says:

    children like to be helpful

  70. 70
    BJ says:

    Never heard of Claire BJ Perry?

    Ask someone to explain the BJ.

  71. 71
    Mary White says:

    It’s not me that needs to calm down, dear. It’s the army of knee-jerk, fake charity and quango parasites conflating reason and zeal. They need to calm down, stop the lies, stop the exaggeration and get proper jobs. Who knows, the economy might even grow.

  72. 72
    Disco Biscuit says:

    How can a poll of 14-16 yr olds tell you anything about what 10 yr olds get up to?


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