August 4th, 2012

Saturday Seven Up

This week a healthy for silly season 88,114 visitors visited 270,346 times viewing 472,473 pages.

The top stories in order of popularity were:

You’re either in front of Guido, or behind…


  1. 1
    Geoff says:

    Not a bad week, Top team you have Guido.

  2. 2 says:

    How the establishment wish to return to the days before bloggers like Guido existed to hold them to account.

  3. 3
    Kebab Time says:

    Hey Guido, did you see this from LOCOG > Not for profit site closed down, so much for Dave`s “Big society ” .

  4. 4
    Handycock No1 Trougher in Parliament says:

    The comment underneath the link from ‘an important politician’ is not me honest. Boaz.

  5. 5
    Norman says:

    On yer bike if yer wannabe a knight.

  6. 6
    Josh says:

    How many unique users are on one day?

  7. 7 says:

    It is a pity though that, while you gallantly expose the motes in the eyes of British transgressors, you rarely mention the planks in the eyes of our European masters. A bit like a choir boy complaining about the scalding treatment he gets from the choirmaster while being repeatedly buggered and physically abused by the Bishop. Maybe you should put some thought into addressing this so it will get the far better coverage it merits.

  8. 8
    The Traitorous Tit in No 10 says:

    I say you jolly chaps!! That stamp scam thingy!! – dashed good idea!!! – is there anything we can buy and then sell to the common people at a higher price? Those pasty things for instance??

    What?? Wattage??

    Hah hah hahahah hahah aha!!!!

  9. 9
    Gabriel says:

    This pin-head ain’t big enough for the both of us.

  10. 10
    How many unique users are on one day? says:

    Depends whether you’re Gordon Brown or not.

  11. 11
    The Traitorous Tit in No 10 says:

    Oh I say !!!! That’s not fair!!! The €USSR DOESN’T abuse us!!! – I give you my word, – and I think you can trust me by now! What??

  12. 12

    Not a bad week? FFS! Where have you got your head stuck up? (I will give you the let-out that you are employing irony.)

    John Doe winning against Northcliffe Media is one of the biggest victories of modern times!

    I would rather have seen that happen (which I did) than have had a seat in the Royal Box for every day of the Olympic Games.

    Guido had an instrumental part in procuring this and you surely cannot realise what importance it held for every one of us, not to mention every other independent thinking person in the world.

  13. 13
  14. 14
    The Religion of Piss and The Bacon of Londistan says:



    Pay attention to what happened to that wayward girl who defied her excellent parents!

  15. 15
    Clause Forever says:

    CIF News

    Dunno if anything is known about Ellie Mae something or other. She seems to have been handed the CIF equivalent of shelling peas or Baby Candy larceny: a piece reminding CIF readers that the Mail didn’t exactly secure a distinction in it’s Diversity GCSE (edexcel); a walk in the park one might suppose. Seems either she wasn’t up to snuff, or there’s a ‘Guardianista Spring’ in the offing; majority of posts didn’t seem to thing the G was in any position to be assuming any high moral stepladders…”at least the Mail knows its readers” seemed to be a common theme.

    I’m sure the recent calls for a rethink on North Korea didn’t help nor their recent series which featured a team of prominent ‘public intellectuals’ patiently outlining that anything but unconditional adoration of the religion of peace was de facto racism, but even so, fucking up a routine piece of Mail bashing shouldn’t have proved quite such a hurdle. Who is she? A Rushbridger niece or cousin…or another one of those Laurie Penny / Johnny Marble ex public school neo-prole anarchy-fuckups? Either way, this must go down as an eye off the ball moment…thank Allah team GB have retained a bit more focus.

  16. 16
    Anonymous says:

    It’s only Ontablets calling himself Geoff rather bizarrely, so he can post a comment first without a barrage of abuse. Bless.

  17. 17
    Clause Forever says:

    Or maybe Rushburner hired G4S to secure his circulation figures? He’s certainly got a habit of hiring less than otherwise-employable undergraduate types to pronounce on the great issues du jour.

  18. 18
    Gordon Brown says:

    I invented Graphic Fidelity you know.

  19. 19
    Hugh Janus says:

    “The €USSR DOESN’T abuse us!!!”

    £53m per day, every day, says it does!

  20. 20

    I have no means of knowing whether your observation is true or not and frankly it doesn’t matter.

    What does matter is having freedom of speech upheld (with über-tightly defined grounds for when it should be overruled – falsely shouting fire in a crowded theatre is the classic case).

    One of the problems with freedoms is that we come to take them for granted. We, as a country, did that in the approach to WW2 and it took an exceptional man to lead us out of it. It is only when those freedoms are threatened, do some people wake up and smell the coffee. By then it can be too late.

  21. 21
    Hugh Janus says:

    Rather like LOCOG stopping the BBC’s Now Show from using the word ‘Olympics’ in their nightly piss-take of this shower. LOCOG obviously detest free speech, something that generations fought and died for. What disgusting creeps they all are, and our spineless politicians just turn their backs and go on accepting the free tickets to this ridiculous circus. ‘Sinister’ doesn’t even begin to describe it.

  22. 22
    sparky says:

    The Amazing Guido Fawkes, champion of free speech, innit?

  23. 23
    HenryV says:

    I want to know the full SP on this Baroness Scotland story in the Daily Fail…..

  24. 24
    Andrew Pierce says:

    Imitation is the sincerest from of flattery,Guido darling.

    Now take the refund and bog off back to Murphyland sweetie.

  25. 25
    The public says:

    When the Olympics have left town, there will be a reckoning. There are quite a number of people who have been habing on the coat-tails of these sporting events who will find that once the show has left town, they will have to face the public. Then we shall see.

  26. 26
    Bearded Clam says:

    “£53m per day, every day, says it does!”

    Well said.
    Does anyone know what we get in return for such a humongous membership fee?.

  27. 27
    Anonymous says:

    The Graun’s fucked. WTF does anyone care if Rushburger’s giving more of his air head relatives comment gigs? What’s better Medhi Hasan or some logically challenged Diversity Studies NVQ student…it’s all good

  28. 28
    Shafilea's Mum and Dad says:

    We were only defending multiculturalism against the relentless steamroller of Western monoculture.

  29. 29
    truly, madly, deeply says:

    Ouch, Clause Forever loves a bit of diversity, 51 shades of cock usually.

  30. 30
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    What ever floaters your boater

  31. 31
    Anonymous says:

    Just cos I don’t want yours pal…don’t lose heart though…just about to have my muesli…might be looking for a toothpick later

  32. 32
    finger of fudge says:

    Hahahaha….muesli, is that what you call your boyfriend’s gritty shit?

  33. 33
    MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

    Dear Mr Modbot if you are going to remove the lead post , you might remove all the related comments , as well as nobody will have a fucking clue why they are there

  34. 34

    I can see the point you are making but it does not pass the test of equivalency IMHO.

    To put it crudely (unusual for me, I know), I hold that I have a right of privacy to go into my toilet and have a Tom tit without television cameras beaming it around the world.

    Now, suppose I live in the middle of London, opposite a main attraction. Before my constitutional, I take sledge hammer in with me and knock out the entire front wall of the bathroom so it is exposed to the masses (assume the building does not collapse!) I then perform. Have I not lost my right to privacy?

    Conversely, if I want to publish something to a selected group of people. Don’t I have the right to do that? Of course, one of those might copy and redistribute it. But that is another matter. I do not see a freedom of speech problem arising in your example. Sorry.

  35. 35
    Clausewitz says:

    No muesli’s what I knit for breakfast. The substance your referring to is something we call Granola. FFS you’re a bunch of Neaderthal’s. What do you start the day with Benito? Coco pops…some kinda transfatty pork based fry-fest…or a longish wank over Nadine D with a strap-on gherkin?
    You hetero-fascist types really get my sheep.

  36. 36
    gagging on vomit says:

    Do you still fancy that muesli?

  37. 37

    @The Great Haddock of the Interwebs and the entire Firmament: Are you thinking what I was thinking before?

  38. 38
    Only 8 days 11 hours 47 minutes until the Olympics are over! Yay! says:

    “Does anyone know what we get in return for such a humongous membership fee?”

    Well and truly stuffed?

    BTW, £53M per day = £23,564,922.57 down the toilet so far today.
    £182,564,922.57 so far this month.
    £11,471,564,922.57 (£11.5billion) so far this year.

    These are figures I like to think about when Cameron says, “we’re all in this together” or “we can’t afford tax cuts”.

  39. 39
    Anonymous says:

    Whatever you were thinking it was probably as boring as arseholes.

  40. 40
    windbag watch says:


    I agree with what you say and your right to say it, even though it’s stating the fucking obvious.

  41. 41
    Mitt Romney says:

    I take this opportunity to wish Barack Obama a very happy birthday (51 today)

    He will be returned as President for a further 4 years later this year.

    I wish him the best of luck,and I mean that most sincerely.

  42. 42

    Sometimes it is necessary to state the bleedin’ obvious, Mr Windbag.

    One would imagine that a sparky would pay more attention to his wiring, wouldn’t you?

  43. 43
    Clause formerly known as I like it up me says:

    I’m not sure I’ve ever been so thoroughly disgusted in my entire puff.My treatment on this site has plumbed new depths of depravity. Rest assured an email is already winging its way to the Met’s cultural diversity squad and I’m compiling a full and frank account of my experience which I’m hoping that nice Mr Rushbridge-over-troubled-waters will agree to run it centre spread in one of his informative life-style whatnots.
    Look on my works, ye bigots and tremble.

  44. 44
    Clause formerly known as I like it up me says:

    No way-should I have to put up with this crap. Whatever happened to those old fashioned British virtues of tolerance, good natured Bonkerness a la Dizzy Ragbag OBE (next honour’s list if there’s any fuckin justice) and mixed race kids having phone sex. Is Danny Boyle the only proper gent left guv?
    No way would Danny come on here making disparaging remarks about what I get up to in private. Jesus wept…this country’s turning into…that other place…erm..Italy…or some such.

  45. 45
    Sir Rowland Hill says:

    Go and paint your post-box Gold there’s a good chap

  46. 46
    Tomorrow's Chip Wrapper says:

    Er probably not….I don’t think the “public” actually care very much and…….don’t forget it’ll be straight into the new season of “Strictly”

  47. 47
    perv watch says:

    I note you didn’t deny your predilection for little black and brown bums.

  48. 48
    windbag watch says:

    Er, you’re mr windbag, not me, and you prove that on here on a daily basis.

  49. 49
    Mark Oaten says:

    Did someone mention floaters?

  50. 50
  51. 51
    annette curton says:

  52. 52

    Considering this is my second day’s visit to this site this year, I consider that puts the value of your comment into perspective for everyone else.

    It is one thing to be born stupid. It is quite another to display it so evidently in public.

  53. 53
    proud to have 51 shades of cock up my chimney says:

    Or the 2012 Amsterdam Gay Pride wankfest.

    This is what happened in 2011.

  54. 54
    windbag watch says:

    Er, point proven.

  55. 55
    erm... says:

    stating the obvious: Hiroshima is being dragged into the public arena.
    it’s our outerwardly jolly and inwardly intense and powerful Boris yet again.
    is this the moment for the man of great depth …Hiroshima Boris… it is the indeed the time for Hiroshima to come into mass public consciousness …. given that the world has moved on from Germany…..s past. genius boris touches the nerves few others do.

  56. 56
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Unfortunately, Willard, you are not Gordon Brown, and your predictions and well-wishes will not necessarily have the opposite effect. And more’s the pity. (Although you were close to the mark on the Olympic Games, it must be said.)

  57. 57
    erm... says:

    willy has a top team. it is as good as being blessed

  58. 58


    That is 1,259, 385 dole seekers for an entire year, Polly, you avaricious, selfish, capitalistic, bourgeois, self-serving, greedy sub-specimen of human excreta. You have denied all these people.

    Actually 1,260,115 in the time it took to write this…

  59. 59
  60. 60
    Mandy says:

    I’m free.

  61. 61
    Clause formerly known as I like it up me says:

    “I note you didn’t deny your predilection for little black and brown bums.”

    Indeed not mate…I’ve got my eyes glued to Jess Ennis’s pert little beauty right this minute. She’d get a PB outta me anytime.

  62. 62
    Chris Bryant says:

    Did someone mention boring arseholes?

  63. 63
    perv watch says:

    Thanks for clear that up.

  64. 64
    I visited this site 13,925 times last week says:

    These figures are fantastic, Guido!

  65. 65
    Schrödіnger's dirty dog says:


  66. 66
    Rio de Gennero says:

    I go to Walls for my choc-ices.

  67. 67
    Blowing Whistles says:

    I would like to remind people of what “Freedom of Expression” is all about. It appears that the Press are ‘only screaming out about their ‘Freedom of the Press’ and many are confusing issues.

    “Freedom of Expression” is for every man and woman [i.e. those not aligned to the press or a political party]

    The Universal Declaration on Human Rights Article 19 states:

    “Everyone has the right to freedom of opinion and expression; this right includes freedom to hold opinions without interference and to seek, receive and impart information and ideas through any media regardless of frontiers”

    The problem ‘nowadays’ is that – it does not suit the Media Moguls, Politicians and their friends – in fact that is why they are trying to slowly repeal Article 19. They thus regain their elitist power of opprssion over the people. The people have become the most powerful – And the Power-crazed do not like it one bit.

  68. 68
    THE STAR on SUNDAY Read it and Wipe says:

    Talking of Arse holes ! How are you ?

  69. 69
    Blowing Whistles says:

    AI of the USA are bouncing around a petition to free the pussy girl rioters in Russia. Suprise suprise – within their (AI’s) written protest – they are asserting none other than Article 19 of the Universal Declaration on Human Rights….

    Sadly though AI USA are promoting many rock stars who are ‘up in arms’ at the treatment in the Russian courts of the pussy girls. The notable not mouth almighty of Maddonna is included.

    But hey What’s Putin going to do about it all – send these girls to prison for 7 years for daring to speak out against him? Putin should read a bit of Voltaire.

  70. 70
    Blowing Whistles says:

    A reminder to those who may have missed it: HAL …

    When you juxtapose the letter H A L – by moving each letter along the alphabet by one letter you get

    IBM – Intenational Business Computers … how odd?

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Rising Stars
Find out more about PLMR AD-MS

Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”

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