Rich & Mark’s Monday Morning View
If Dave Were President He’d Have Resigned By Now | Alex Wickham
Loongate: What Happened in the Blue Boar Bar | Simon Walters
Feldman’s Tennis Days With Dave | Telegraph
How Geoffrey Howe Has Lost the Debate | Robin Shepherd
Dave Has Lost Control on Europe | Geoffrey Howe
Lib Dems Should Support EU Referendum | LibDemVoice
Feldman’s Denial | Fraser Nelson
Obama’s Presidency is Imploding | Nile Gardiner
Miliband Could Be a Great PM | Thomas Pascoe
What Are You Really Paying in Income Tax? | TPA
Galloway’s Mad Month | The Commentator
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Tom Harris bemoans the public’s attitude to politicians…
“Mr Oborne echoes the lazy, anti-politics whine we hear so often these days, all based on the absurd notion that politicians were once loved and only fell out of public favour during the expenses scandal. He should take a walk to the Strangers’ Bar. But not to sup with the patrons he seems to despise so much, dearie me, no; he should instead look at the paintings on the corridor outside the bar, which depict the devastating fire which consumed most of the Palace in 1834. And he should reflect on the fact that on that dramatic night, as the Commons went up in flames, a crowd gathered on the South Bank to clap and cheer.”
Focus group time. says:
The thing that Dave needs to work out is which group is more likely to vote Conservative. Mad swivel-eyed loons or mad homosexuals wishing to get married.
No, you’ve got me there. Who is it?
it can be anyone of Coe, IDS, Grayling, Cameron – they’re all c’unts
Dolly troll alert!
For the road race they resurfaced the road around hump hill.
Thankfully they took away the Surrey Pyrenees otherwise there would have been 40 plus first category climbs each circuit.
It’s David Miliband?
Tatty boy is up early must be the day to pick his benefits cheque up lol
Dunno who he is, but can I have his tickets?
Hey! – you missed me out!! I £ove it when you ta£k about me!!
Is it Diane Abbott and reinforced rope?
Is it Jeremy Paxman?
Stephen Milligan?
Good to see that the bodily reaction to hanging is graphically included! Most realistic!
Burley will be aware of the effect on Nazi victims, no doubt.
And it appears that you might well have been pretty correct about the sinister leftist undertones of the opening ceremony.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2180863/London-2012-Olympics-Labour-Party-delighted-Games-socialist-opening-ceremony.html
Its called ‘doing an Enoch’.
Some poor sap is roundly criticised by various limp wristers, only to be proved right at a later date.
Cock.
I don’t know what you are on about. Feargal Sharkey always seemed a nice chap.
I’m so very happy it all worked out OK!
Yes it appears that all those saying it was leftist propaganda are wrong yet the Labour party are saying exactly that ? Im confused.
I think the message is criticising leftie propaganda is wrong.
Lynching originated in America and is an American term. It has nothing to do with criticism of Boyle’s opening ceremony and implies something quite different.
Not impressed and the art is terrible.
Oh yes it does.
In a recent newspaper survey 1 in 3 people believe that Danny Boyle’s PC “showcase” was less than inspiring, in spite of all the BBC luvvies trying to get on the coat tails bandwagon in praise of Danny and his future “shows”.
Aiden Burley was right on his left wing multicultural statement. Anyone abroad seeing this Olympic opening would believe that immigrants constituted 50% of our population, and we spent most of our time in bed, and chasing gremlins to out of date oldie music.
The artwork in the “cartoon” is at the usual quality – could do better.
+1
The Bee Gees was played just as the team from Fiji came out. Genius.
which one ? they did a few over the years
Staying Alive
With them being large black men
I thought it was “How Deep is your Love”
Massive show’s shit.
Auto erotic asphyxia
With or without a satsuma, knickers and suspenders?
Once did a cave rescue team call out for a missing fell walker, a head teacher.
The guys who found him, said he was ‘partialy clothed’ kneeling on a copy of the guardian, two belts attached together, one round his neck and the other round his ankles . Unfortunately the excitement of looking at a magazine full of strapping young lads had proved too much for him.
Always been suspicious of guardian readers since then !
Rightly so!
So you weren’t suspicious of the bastards before then?
He used to give them the benefit of the doubt!
???
Oh dear, you’ve used the Rings! They’ll be coming after you now for unauthorised use! You haven’t paid the licensing fee! It’s a crime even worse than Burley’s, FFS! He just criticised them– you’ve used the Rings for satire! A hanging offence, for sure!
I use rings all the time, but in my position as a world-class superannuated politico I’m above the law.
Yes. Satire. It’s very advanced for Rich and Mark. Think it deserves one point, just for that. Don’t know wtf is hanging though…
Yet another referral to Leveson to ascertain why the victim’s blackberry was hacked.
Why all this multicultural crap?
Where are all of the illegal immigrants?
Is ‘hacking a blackberry’ a new urban slang term for something deliciously perverted?
Is it anything to do with the multicultural crap of which I am so fond?
I’m free!
We demanded an investigation but were told that she’d been cleared for security at Heathrow and was just a little excited
Will a parliamentary select committee enquiry suit you, Mr Vaz, or would you prefer a judge-led one?
Fucking empty seats everywhere, told you those shysthers where running one of the biggest scams of all time with the Olympic tickets when thousands missed out on the chance to get one because they where all ‘sold out’.
If they where all ‘sold out’ then why the half empty stadiums….
Fucking con artists.
They must have used all that spare NHS computer capacity that they spent billions on to issue and count the tickets for each venue.
nah they used the NHS computers at wembley so that not even visa cards could be used
Corporate sponsorship does not cover the costs of this show.
Londoners will be paying for this bash for many years.
These empty seats are being subsidised by hard working people.
The empty seats are also unfilled by the arses of the Olympic workers, the crony friends of the organisers, the families and friends of those taking part and don’t forget the arses of the 20,000+ security people, police and army.
There was a credit card company that had some of the seats, said people had won them. one wonders if a happy chap in the Shetlands won a ticket and said “ah thats nice”.
They’re half full, not half empty. You should have gone to Specsavers.
the stadia are twice as big as they need to be
- and needing twice the bang to bring them down?
Don’t give the Fenian get of a blogger any encouragement! It’s not the Houses of Parliament!
So what’s Lord Mandelslime in the news for this time?? Have they finally got him for playing with lots of rings?
The head of the Somali Olympic squad has apologised after realising Shooting and Sailing are not the same event
Does anyone know who that is meant to be?
You clearly don’t get out a lot.
Nor, it seems, do you read well.
Its the straw man from the pre-industrial bit of the ceremony getting his come-uppance at the hands of some NHS pilgrims.
Its the wicker man. The daily ceremonial practice of sacrificing someone for daring to speak his mind about the state of the nation.
I suppose all the beds used in the farce were ex hospital beds taken from storage after all those Libor ward closures, part of broon the loon “investments” programme.
Probably the beds that all those old patients were starved and left to die in their own piss & shit at Stafford hospital.
Or the hundreds murdered at Maidstone hospital by the NHS
If there was an Olympics for cartoons Skid@Mark would be Eddie the Eel
Who the fuck is that supposed to be ?
Without the aid of the usual name tag , i’m clueless !l
I think just ‘clueless’ would have been sufficient for you.
CND!
We are not allowed to mention Pilgrims or David Miliband?
Right. I’m going swimming today. So you don’t have to put up with me.
Frankly, it was a *toss-up* (words chosen with great care, as always) between listening at second hand to what they were insulting our intelligence with at the Olympics, on the one hand, and studying the naked bodies of delicious young ladies from Germany, Austria, NL, Sweden, Slovenia etc, on the other. No brainer, really.
Gillette seems to be very popular in these parts and leads to a much more pleasant experience, in several senses… *licks eyebrows lustily*
You Sir, are a Gentleman! I can discern this from the exquisite delicacy of your writing, the accurate but oh so gentle allusions to the most tender and desirable attributes of the young wimmin involved, and your plans for the day!
Have, as they say in some unkempt areas, a good one!
I am belatedly but necessarily most grateful, Sir, for your kind words. As my dear friend of old, Engineer, has said to me in the past, It takes one to know one. Your writing is also possessed of consummate elegance and refinement.
You may be interested to know that my day turned out to contain a penetrating insight into the ultimate glory of womanhood.
Makes a change from windows, presumably!
Don’t forget your sombrero and your baseball cap them nuddy beaches can be very hot places !
mornin mate!
http://farm1.static.flickr.com/196/493682980_400946f18c.jpg
I thought you were now deceased.
http://www.annaraccoon.com/politics/rip-captain-haddock/
To save the euro, very high unemployment is a price worth paying, even the socialists think so now! Just ask Hollande?
Hollande probably thinks that to save the euro you need to borrow loads of money and “invest” in jobs.
Quite a sound plan really, when you’ve found the magic money tree.
Correction! – not Money Tree – Money PIT !
All politicians find magic money pits.
Money trough – we feed at it daily.
Important new discoveries prove beyond doubt that Citizen Comrade Lord Horatio Nelson held daily political Re-education Classes for all his sailors aimed at furthering their love and knowledge of the €USSR and France in particular.
That is all.
Pay your Telly Tax!
You gotta laugh. The British public whinge about politicians being dishonest. Yet whenever one of them says what he (and millions of others) honestly believes they are pilloried for it. The NHS is a crock of shit that treats far too many people inhumanely and any criticism of the negligent, apathetic cossetted untouchables within it is regarded as blasphemy.
agree 100%
+1
Remember when we weren’t allowed to talk about immigration because “everyone” said multiculturalism was a good thing? Then the tide changed.
If you say anything negative about the NHS, you get rent-a-mouth saying “oh how dare you say anything against our poor hardworking nurses”.
Of course, anyone who has actually been in an NHS hospital knows the nurses are all sat round the desk gossiping and ticking boxes, and let the ancilliaries run around doing all the real work.
Hopefully the tide will change for the fat cats living off the self-serving NHS very soon.
Not just the NHS. It will soon be anything that our PC MP’s can think up.
100 years ago they tried to stop education for the masses and judging by voter response they succeeded quite well. Now they want to totally control what we say as of 8 years ago.
The “We are all in it Together” mantra has far more meaning to the 3 Westminster parties feeding at the power and money trough; than it does for the general public who simply feel they are victims.
Gaffe: Something a politician is said to have made on one of those rare occasions when they actually tell the truth.
I don’t know who the hangedman is but could it be the copper that lost the keys of the stadium
Shame it’s not the copper who killed Mr Thompson !
Its gotta be a Tory MP. That’s all Rich and Mark ever try to lampoon.
Rich & Mark get my vote.
We are reassured that as the Olympics get into the final stages all those empty seats will fill up
So that means that Joe public pays a fortune for a seat up in the gods for a massively inflated price for one day of events
Yet the wankers who have the empty seats right at the front get tickets for the whole events from start to finish !
You couldn’t make it up
Are R&M celebrating an extension of the Liverpool pathway?
I’ve had enough of the Sports Olympics. When do the sex olympics start? Personally I am quite looking forward to the synchronised muff-diving and the wife can’t wait for the cock-fighting events.
Yes, they were far more interesting when last held in the 60s.
All this panting without humping is so boring.
it’s surely Lord Cohen?
The cartoon should have depicted a British athlete wearing a Gold medal !
Now that would have been funny
What Gold medal two days of glorious British failure so far.
Team Eddie the Eagle GB
I wish the Team GB 4′s the very best of luck in the rowing at Eton Dorney.
I predict a Gold medal chaps.
Why is the NHS lynching Danny Boy and not Burns or Lansley?
I’m surprised it isn’t Nick Buckles.
Or is it the man who’s lost the keys to the door?
Why would I be using my reserved seats? I’m in London, sun is shining, lots of shopping to do, and then there is the important matter of lunch – no Michelin starred restaurants out at the Olympic Park. So I won’t be out there until the closing ceremony – but my seats must be kept empty, that’s specified in the contract, so you little people can all take a flying fuck.
Why was half the British Army watching the gymnastics yesterday ?
Did one of their guys do an online block booking for himself and 500 of his platoon ??
British Army down to one platoon? I didn’t do that it was all Bliar’s fault.
I think it’s fantastic that they managed to squeeze some honkys into the opening ceremony. If must have been galling that people like Brunel and Sir Tim Berners-Lee had to be portrayed as white, but you can’t have everything.
I was particularly thrilled to see that the NHS and unfettered immigration is seen as the centre of our cultural life.
What the fuck must we look like abroad? Is there a single historical example of a culture voluntarily destroying itself as comprehensively as this?
I tried but could not reach the depths that Danny Boy and his retinue did.
Comment of the day.
Gave you a plug at the DT.
http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/iainmartin1/100173270/the-olympic-opening-ceremony-started-well-and-then-got-creepy/#comment-603052626
Another DT plug here, which seems to be be holding top spot
http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/culture/allanmassie/100065451/london-olympics-2012-the-olympic-values-of-fair-play-and-sportsmanship-are-stamped-made-in-britain/#comment-603081837
Seems a bit harsh on Derek Griffiths. I used to like him when he presented Play School back when I was a lad. Don’t think he’s involved in the olympics anyway?
looks like andy burnham………..