July 24th, 2012

Bonkers Bryn’s Latest By-Election Blunder

After Occupy tramp Bryn Phillips lied to get on the ballot at the upcoming City of London by-election, you would think he would try to stay on the right side of the law. This rioter, who was recently found guilty of violent disorder and burglary, is hilariously trying to stand on a moral platform.

He’s not too hot on the law though and failed to declare his conviction on his ballot submission.

Guido would now like to introduce him to some new legislation - Section 66 of the 1983 Representation of the People Act. That’s the bit that  that forbids “any statement relating to the way in which voters have voted at the election” being made before polls close.

So perhaps bonkers Bryn could explain his latest Twitter outpouring:

Labour MP Kerry McCarthy was cautioned for an identical crime during the last election. Either Bryn is lying, and he has not seen the postal votes, or he has broken the law. Which is it?


50 Comments

  1. 1
    Lee says:

    He does seem a sandwich short of a picnic!

    • 4
      Uh says:

      too many kebabs

      • 12
        minutiae-watcher spotter says:

        Thank god someone’s on the case. *makes a little dried-bogie effigy*

    • 6
      Useless shower says:

      At least he will get a wash if he goes to prison.

      • 9
        Don't Drop the Soap says:

        I think the prison’s showers will be the last place he’ll want to visit.

        • 31
          V1le Labour ruined my Country says:

          He’s probably lying. I’m avoiding as much tax as possible as it’s morally wrong for Government to waste it on overseas aid, Europe, MP’s expenses, public sector parasites, benefit spongers and immigrants.

        • 48
          keredybretsa says:

          Only to pick up the fallen soap!

    • 36
      Anonymous says:

      I’d still ratherhe got it than any of the other slimy, corrupt cronies.

  2. 2
    davidc says:

    must be the sunny weather affecting his ‘brain’

  3. 3
    Nullbymouth says:

    To be fair 1/2 a postal vote is better than none

  4. 5

    Umm the “1/2″ in the tweet doesn’t mean “half” it means the first of two tweets. So he clearly does not know the result.

    Naughty Guido ;)

    • 7
      Twitter is Purely for Twats says:

      Guido didn’t say anything about “1/2 the votes”, he simply pointed out that the convicted criminal has allegedly broken section 66 of the 1983 Representation of the People Act.

    • 10
      Sir Aston Martin says:

      No, it means “one or two”, #1 being from his mum, #2 possibly from Auntie Ada, though she thinks he’s a tosser and has probably spoiled her ballot.

      • 40
        Gordon Brown says:

        I soiled my ballot

      • 50
        bald old git says:

        Even so, he cannot make the statement about how people have voted. And even if his meaning is unclear (which it may be), he still has to account for it …

        And there’s still the matter of whether or not statements made in his application process were entirely accurate.

  5. 8
    Bonkers. Stark Raving Bonkers says:

    • 11
      Socialism - the political equivalent of acne. says:

      To be fair, most teenagers are very naive, politically. He’ll grow up when he gets to 22.

      • 23
        Bluebird says:

        Yup the political equivalent of acne. Well strange things happen to teenagers and I suppose that socialism is among them. He is a good case however for raising the voting age back up to 21. With the education age (and therefore childhood) being raised eventually to 18 it makes sense to allow the franchise not when one leaves school but when one is actually part of society, working, paying taxes, and being engaged with politics.

        To take an alternative and more charitable view of him however; We’ve all done politically twatty things as young people, I can look back on my youthful misdemenours (such as joining the SWP for a short while) with a shudder and move on having learned important lessons. This poor bastard’s half baked political diarrhea will be visible on the internet for years and years, he is never going to be able to escape his youthful twattery.

        • 44
          Anonymous says:

          Little Britain missed a trick with this incredibly stupid little nonce didn’t they? He’s set a new bench mark for utter fuckwittery, that’s for sure.

        • 46
          Sally Bercow says:

          I was in the Tory party once and spoke at conference.

    • 19
      Benny Fitz-Clements says:

      If the money has run out, plant some of Libor’s Money Trees.

    • 22
      Handycock Immigrant Trafficker says:

      Bryn is a man after my own heart. It is easy to know how many postal votes you are going to get, if you are in with the asian community and other immigrant communities. Boaz.

      http://www.portsmouth.co.uk/news/portsmouth-takes-quarter-of-south-s-asylum-seekers-1-3548241

    • 26
      Bluebird says:

      Having viewed as much of this video as I can stand I can’t help thinking ‘is it a spoof?’ Is Chris Morris going to put his hand up to making it for a laugh or is the shade of Mr Beadle still working?

      It screams Trustafarian bohemian.

      • 37
        JH says:

        I picked up the term Fauxhemian from the Die Hipsters blog.

        Perfect description for this little turd.

        Navel gazing little twats like this only get to be navel gazing little twats because someone productive is picking up the bill.

    • 45
      joescotus says:

      is there no start to this kuuunts talent?

  6. 12
    Postal Voter says:

    How many votes is it you would like to have ? Innit.

    • 17
      democracy is a sham says:

      Does it matter? Look at the excuse for a government we ended up with.

  7. 14
    Bob R says:

    … and failed to declare his conviction on his ballot submission.
    S5(b) Perjury Act 1911.
    http://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/Geo5/1-2/6/section/5

    • 29
      one of two says:

      just needs somebody to tell the returning officer…usually that honour goes to the other candidates or their agents….unles Bryn is somehow connected with said RO

  8. 15
    Bryn Phillips says:

    From what I’ve been told, that’s how the postal votes are going– yeah, that’s it, people come up to me and they tell me, “Bryn, we postal-voted for you!” Yeah, that’s the ticket! I get that all the time! Sure, that’s what I meant to say in the Tweet, innit?

    Well, anyway, that’s my story, and I’m going to stick to it, see?

  9. 16
    Popeye says:

    If he’s trying to emulate Kerry McCarthy he must be bent.

    • 42
      Rat's arse says:

      Is Kerry McCarthy that ugly bint who looks as though she’s got no teeth?

  10. 18
    David, call me Prime Minister if you like says:

    We’ll all be rioters one day.

    lol x and chortling uncontrollably.

  11. 20
    Ken Lunchbox says:

    For some areas of London, the sight of a black boy running through the streets in new trainers holding a burning torch may seem like an annual event!

  12. 21
    Nicola Clubb says:

    what goes around comes around (watch this space)

    • 24
      Bin Phillips says:

      How long should I watch this space and how much will the State pay me per hour ?

  13. 25

    “This rioter, who was recently found guilty of violent disorder and burglary, is hilariously trying to stand on a moral platform.”

    Yes, and..?

  14. 28
    EdButLookBalls says:

    Get a proper job you lazy feckin’ scruff!

  15. 32
    liberace and bobby crush says:

    at least he can play the pianoforte …..dears

  16. 33
    Labourunionsbbc we are one says:

    Sounds like a very well spoken little posh boy, perfect sham pain socialist I s’pose.

  17. 35
    Edinburgh can go and fuck itself says:

    What a moron.

    • 38
      Call me Dave says:

      I trust Andy Coulson implicitly and think everything here is being simply beastly. Give him a third chance!

      • 43
        Rat's arse says:

        He hasn’t been found guilty yet CMD. Talk about trial by media. Let’s just wait for the Jury’s verdict shall we?

  18. 39
    herd mentality and the sheeple's republic says:

    So if every baaarsehole is voting for him, so will I. Gotta go with the flock. Baaaaaah!

  19. 41
    Jimmy says:

    Wouldn’t a hypothetical blogger who repeated the tweet be guilty of the same offence?

  20. 47
    AnalStatistician says:

    Guido must also be guilty of the same offence, since he repeats it here. Not only that, but he (Guido) actually claims knowledge of it’s veracity, whereas Bryn simply used Twitter to make a vague statement.

    Odd that Guido is seeking to link this to Maurice Glasman, who appears to be the very model of the Blue, right-wing New Laborite.

  21. 49
    Omar The Magical Gyppo Hates Butlin's says:

    Will his running mate be that puffed-up little twat in the wheelchair ?


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