Internship Available in Tom Watson’s Office
Guido imagines that applications will open in about an hour…
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Tom Harris bemoans the public’s attitude to politicians…
“Mr Oborne echoes the lazy, anti-politics whine we hear so often these days, all based on the absurd notion that politicians were once loved and only fell out of public favour during the expenses scandal. He should take a walk to the Strangers’ Bar. But not to sup with the patrons he seems to despise so much, dearie me, no; he should instead look at the paintings on the corridor outside the bar, which depict the devastating fire which consumed most of the Palace in 1834. And he should reflect on the fact that on that dramatic night, as the Commons went up in flames, a crowd gathered on the South Bank to clap and cheer.”
Focus group time. says:
The thing that Dave needs to work out is which group is more likely to vote Conservative. Mad swivel-eyed loons or mad homosexuals wishing to get married.
Good scoop guido
Ohhh Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!!!!
T.WAT toTwit
Twittering TWAT
OT Whitewash enquiry in Oz.
http://www.bishop-hill.net/blog/2012/1/26/brisbane-floods-redux.html
Indeed and I have the ideal candidate for the job in Ellie Gellard lined up. Once I can extract her tongue from the end of Ed Balls knob !
TWAT-raped? Divide and rule more like. It’s what they do. He should be sacked by the end of the afternoon. Disgusting.
“I will deal with the matter offline” !
Is it just me but i have no idea what these tweets mean, what the fuck is everybody getting excited about ?
I think that the implication is that Watson tweeted the phrase “Twit-rape” which many could find offensive , and then tried to blame the intern by tweeting an apology frpm someone purporting to be said intern.
I know nothing…..
Has anyone seen my amyl nitrate?
I hope it hurt!
Only when you dress like a giraffe
I am looking for another Intern’s job Tom and I come highly recommended.
Warn him that if he is another Pervert like Handycock, Katya, he will have me to deal with.
Ve must do syumthing about this “Dad”. He is proving to be a dyifficulty.
Hi Vlad,
Be over soon, have the girls ready.
The dont like it up em!
Oh, but they do in Westminster.
How can Labour be so shit at Twitter?
(Oh yeah, Ed for President)
Because Twitter is institutionally biased against progressive politics.
Does Tom want my CV?
Fire up the Neo, Guido! It’s a job for someone young and svelte and the job’s got his name shot though like a stick of Brighton rock.
More likely it’s a job for someone who can eat for Britain and drink 15 pints plus in a sessions whilst ogling any stray bits of skirt that happen to wander by.
Neo, in fact. Or his master.
That’s what I was thinking.
And you are………….?
Jesus Christ, why do these arseholes have social media accounts at all.
It’s almost as if they are a bunch of narcissistic incompetents who crave the oxygen of attention and gratitude as they ruin the lives of others.
Well it turns them into a laughing stock and gets them loads of attention it’s true. I doubt there’s much gratitude out there especially for the likes of twatson who’s been a well known assassin for gordon brown.
Dunning Kruger + Narcissism = Modern Politician
Add Envy and Projection and you get a modern leftist.
And this is the man sitting in judgement on the media?
?
…and if you liked this, you can read more on my personal blog!
http://jh.blogspot.com
and just what Sad Bastard is going to work for that Sweaty Fat Self Serving Useless F uck
I could not have put it better….
I mean, you would be far more employable if you put on your CV that you were unemployed rather than saying you worked for most for this K. UNT.
At least then you could show you had some self respect.
If you were interviewing someone who let slip they’d worked for Tom Watson, wouldn’t your eyes subconsciously glance at the picture on the wall that hides the safe?
Just been watching “Inception”?
A few months ago!
Almost any aspirant socialist pig-fancier.
ouch
Presumably no wages are available so it’ll be a volunteer post then.
And given twatson’s addiction to xbox games and the like it needs to be someone who’s capable of doing twatson’s job for him.
Any 5 year old could manage it I suspect.
Just shows the quality of Labour’s interns – they don’t even have the common sense to delete the tweet!!!
“Labour Party” and “common sense” are not related concepts.
i suspect Tom was using the the intern as cover for himself
Intern! INTERN! OH JESUS CHRIST, INTERN!!
Send in a Fake C.V. for a Mr Fenton….
Take your intern, Bendover Tom!
By the by what does he want an intern for?
Don’t tell me he can’t even delete his own tweets and make his own coffee.
I thought this man was a member of the shadow front bench. Ahhh I forgot that is of course the calibre of militwit’s ‘cabinet’ isn’t it!
Its an obvious piece of attention seeking, I don’t believe its genuine for a minute. Not as sharp as i thought you were Guido.
Thanks for clearing that up; so just for a laugh, Tom Watson deliberately wanted it to look as though someone else had been meddling with his Twitter account – but actually it was him all the time and we all fell for it!
What a productive use of his time. Wish he was my MP.
He’s busier than Gordon, though, you have to admit.
Mind you, my lawnmower is busier than Gordon just at the moment.
What I want to know is – why Gordon has gone swanning off to Davos when he can’t even be bothered to turn up for his day-job at Westminster?
Surely he’s not giving a speech? Is he? Who wants to hear anything Mr Boom and Bust has to say?
Anyone seen even talking to Jonah will be put on suicide watch.
++LOL++
So much for the media guru image.
We need a campaign where any MP with a twitter account has to be honest. If they tweet in their name, they can use their name.
But if they have staff then the account should be called “The Office of [Tom Watson]” so we can realise the fakers.
They’re all fkers.
@tom_watson
tom_watson
I sincerely apologise for the recent tweet. A lesson learned for a young intern. She’s also very sorry. I will deal with the matter offline.
The thought of being a young woman about to be “dealt with” by Tom Watson literally makes my blood run cold.
+1
The man is a self-regarding fucking arsehole. Look at this entry on his ‘blog’, who does he think he is?
His Twitter account was obviously hacked by the News International Mafia, right Tom?
I look at his blog entry. It seems incomplete. The following words are missing.
FAT
USELESS
SELF SERVING
SWEATY
LYING
K. UNT
“Moron” and “parasite” are conspicuous by their absence, too.
We know that you’re too busy fighting off your biological urges and being l33t hax0rs to Get Involved, but politics is cool, m’kay?Nobody ever seems to do anything for The Kids! All the decisions are made by suits, man. That’s so lame!!! We know you think of yourselves as responsible citizens, but what you wanna do is turn that thought into an action, dudes.
I think what they really “wanna” do is ransack the nearest Phones4U and set fire to a carpet shop.
you missed his breath stinks of McRuins cock……….
“I came here after reading your tweets (best look after them yourself). I see that your website also suggests you don’t take your job seriously. I’m only glad you’re not my MP.
Your comment is awaiting moderation.”
Watson’s intern only has two jobs: Go to McDonald’s five times a day to get his meals, and answer all calls with “He can’t come to the phone right now”.
Twat!
‘Deal with the matter offline’. OK Tom.
This process will involve the undoubtedly attractive young intern being required to have a number of drinks out on the town with Mr Watson, as he gets increasingly drunk and progresses from the demeanour of a self-appointed father figure to more of a randy uncle.
Tom’s fantasy will be to cast her in the forging his new post-divorce last-chance-saloon image, a role that involves an experience not dissimilar to coitus with a Manatee.
coitus with a Manatee.
You called lover boy?
“Disorganised Labour Politician”– give him this, Truth In Advertising! Anyone remember his vendetta against Swiftcover, carried on via Twitter, about a month and a half or so ago? And this mong is in charge of development of getting out Labour’s message through cultivating New Media types. Can’t make this up, folks! Hmm, wonder what he was doing when he should have been minding the store…
http://i2.sell.com/23/115/1513030/56/168/3670383-l.jpg
I’m not so sure.
“One last thing: It may be a pointless endeavour but I have started to raise your (Swiftcover) poor service across an array of social networks. It relieves the ennui of dealing with the passive aggressive people you employ to take “service” calls at the contact centre.”
Can’t knock him for that, it’s what I like to do when I (all too often) get crap service.
He wouldn’t do it against the worst services in the country, those in the extortion funded sector.
Good Lord, am I ever with you when it comes to poor service, Tess! You’re right, of course, in terms of wanting to publicise the subpar service of any organisation like Swiftcover, and I’m sure we could swop plenty of war stories on that score! But my complaint with Mr Watson MP was that it really isn’t in his or any politician’s remit to pay off petty grudges in public, and especially in his case, as a communications czar of sorts for his Party, he needs to project a more adult image than petulant little Tweets about how they were late in delivering his car. And I moot this question to you, Tess: Does the fact that he’s in Opposition mitigate the offence? Suppose this were a Government quasi-Minister doing this, and not a Shadow? People might wonder whether he had the capability and inclination to call upon the resources of HM Appropriate Agency to go after someone that pissed him off personally. Think about it.
Good points, Ali and AC.
Which one’s Nicola? The attractive one, or the one with her gob wide open?
Just took a look on Twitter – apparently she’s a media and sociology student.
Exactly the sort of gimp who falls for Labour’s BS in general and Twatson’s BS in particular.
“media and sociology student”
#Doyouwantfrieswiththat?
@Goldsmiths
#WhichwaytotheJobCentre?
Media and sociology student
Labour are absolutely beyond parody aren’t they? Fantastic.
But wood she?
She did & I would
She already HAS for God’s sake.
You have to work hard for an internship.
Tom Watson digital pledges:
9. Elected representatives have a responsibility to understand how the digital space can be used to design public services, develop public policy and engage citizens in law-making.
Comment 24 November 2010 – Government reform of DirectGov and direction of how government delivers web services.
Supported a bid to provide basic social media and online engagement training to MPs.
http://www.tom-watson.co.uk/digital-pledges/
Hear hear
Tell us James Davies, if it had been a tory what would you say?
Perhaps I’m just thick, but I have no idea what the fuck is going on here… What does “twit-rape me” mean? I assume that the intern was tweeting as Tom Watson, so why would the intern ‘twit-rape’ him, even though it is, in fact, her?
Very confusing.
The workings of tortured minds.
I assume ‘twit-rape’ refers to somebody having a good fucking go on your Twitter account against your will.
Anyway – it’s okay – the word ‘rape’ was used inappropriately by a woman, and not just any woman but a leftist woman, so that makes it okay.
I’m not so sure. The word rape is now not acceptable.
Ape is the replacement. Or perhaps gape.
Yes, “Twat-gape me” is perfectly ok.
I’m with you JJ. I have never really understood what’s going on…
It’s something on twitter and is therefore is so trivial that it’s not worth any thought.
Think it started on facebook tbh.
George ‘Moonbat’ Monbiot was ‘twit-raped’ the other day by some spammer promoting some miracle diet. About 10 tweets of this before he regained control of his account. Ha ha!
Couple days ago tweets appeared on Jordan’s account regarding Chinese GDP, Eurozone debt crisis and bond market liquidity.
Obviously they are genuine and made by Ms Price herself
given monbiot’s usual drivel … I didnt really notice
Very strange indeed. How can someone be raped with a Tweet anyway? But Dave did say too may Tweets make a Twat.
I think I’ve got it . A Twit rape is when someone gets hold of your device that is logged into your Twitter account and makes a Tweet that makes you look like a Twat. This girl on work experience was doing a pretend Tweet on Twatson’s phone and pressed send in error?
Thanks for clearing this up TR – seems to be a classic case of clusterfuckery.
Kids, eh?
You is dividing and ruling me, whitey.
We are engaged in intersecting the world of traditional media with social technology.
http://rtozmedia.com/
Fuck off already!
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Sarah you make me yawnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn
Looks to me like he got Nicola to take the rap for him.
Is she related to Huhne’s wife?
I’d like to twat Twatson.
P.S. No-one named Miliband need apply.
PPS Bring extra pies.
I like the sound of this job. Twitter and pies.
Is logging him off part of the job description?
log me off harder and faster babe!
He should offer it to some one who has recently been made unemployed.
Glen Mulcaire isn’t doing much at the moment.
If he doesn’t want the job, there’s always Little Neddy Miliband, who’s just twiddling his thumbs at the mo.
When offering observations on “Nu Media” it is imperative that one uses the correct verb form, since it is easy for “noobs” to become confused owing to the plethora of new and unfamiliar terminology.
Hence, if “I Twit”, then “you Twat” “he Twat” “she Twat” and “they Twats”.
Thank you.
Twato,Twatas,Twatat,Twatamus,Twatatis,Twatant
Veni Vidi Twati
Twit twit twat twoo (twit-twat) twoo twoo snigger snigger
more importantly how does a media student not know how twitter works and why is she tweeting away now?
Look comrade, you don’t have to KNOW anything to get on in the Labour Party.
Any news on Huhne?
The suspense of waiting to hear if the slimy arsehole gets charged is getting too much, only I’m set to win a score if he does.
Twitter RAPE! TWITTER RAPE!
Only and intern could spell “off” incorrectly…
or “off of”!
As in “Get your fat sweaty body off of my chest, Mr Twatson”
I’m confused about this Twitter thing but is this a Tweet sent by Tom Watson to Tom Watson and why would he be Tweeting himself, Is this Twit wank?
He must have changed it – now he is having a go at Sun_Politics with that tweet.
Aint’ the fat tub got some fucking work to do?
He has, he’s changed it. It was originally addressed to himself and ow he’s made he Sun the recipient. Must all the stress from giving his female intern a spanking over the office photocopier.
T om W AT son
Yawn.
oh dear, how sad, never mind!
Predictably faux outrage from Laurie.
The woman who characterised the suffragettes as right-wing reactionaries who supported Oswald Moseley is feigning that she’s upset.
Awwwww. Shame.
If you can’t take it then don’t dish it out. Pet.
Mosley was a Fabian, he was very much left wing. Facism is left wing, penny dread is to stupid to realise this as is Mench who allowed her to state this.
You’re easily disgusted then, my advice would not to read the comments,
Unfortunately, neither Laurie nor Louise is as insightful, inspirational or enlightening as they both clearly believe themselves to be.
Their horrified reaction to a bit of online p*sstaking is primarily borne out of the realisation that they’re seen as being more akin to Sally Bercow than Aung San Suu Kyi.
How do you justify “mud-wrestle” sexual language about us?
Yeah. Shocking.
http://www.gq-magazine.co.uk/comment/articles/2012-01/03/louise-mensch-iron-maiden
A rock-chick bonkbuster author…..
irony alert
YOU can understand the frustration on both sides. Environmentalists worldwide are clamouring for bold action to end the burning of fossil fuels and plug the world into renewables. Politicians throw their weight behind a $14 billion scheme that would replace the equivalent of eight coal-fired power stations with tidal power. What do they get for their pains? Green outrage.
“This massively damaging proposal cannot be justified,” said Graham Wynne, chief of the UK’s normally staid Royal Society for the Protection of Birds (RSPB). Friends of the Earth said it was “not the answer”. What is going on here? Have greens lost the plot? Has environmentalism been hijacked by big construction companies? Or do we simply have to learn that even environmental energy comes at an environmental cost?
Fight !!
I’ll soon have plenty of time on my hands to think this one through.
Am I allowed to tweet from Pentonville?
The RSPB are very strange people. They are against Boris Peninsula because a plane might get knocked over by a plane yet have no objections to on and offshore windfarms that mince up bats and birds.
Because they don’t give a shit about flying sea mammals.
If ever an organization is guilty of mission creep it’s the RSPB. Their accusations go unchallenged and their desire to police just about every aspect of rural life is insatiable.
The RSPCA are 100 times worse.
I don’t have tits
It’s nonsense anyway. If they construct a Severn Barrier then all that will happen is that the flooded bits favoured by wading birds will move a bit more upstream or downstream or up-slope or down-slope depending on what overall effect the barrier has.
The fucking birds will still be able to figure out where is a good place to nest. And they’ll be getting a bird’s eye view of it too it won’t exactly be blind-mans bluff. We won’t be moving the reed-beds to Canada or anything.
They don’t nest in the mud, but I’m sure you had feeding in mind.
With a lower tidal range, there would be smaller area of beach/mud/sand that gets covered and uncovered every tide – ie the places they feed in.
If the argument is that a lower tidal range provides a smaller area for feeding then a few bulldozers should be able to lower a few extra acres/square miles to make up the loss.
They’ll go as extinct as polar bears(*)
*Numbers seem to the sharply up as photoshopped pictures of “stranded” lonely polar bears are manufactured for anthropomorphically imbecilic homo-”sapien”s.
Exactly. Every time The Tamar gets dredged to allow ships and Subs access into Devonport they all come out of the woodwork saying how it will decimate the wildlife. After loads of wasted time and pointless argument the river gets dredged and life carries on.
On the other side of the Tamar is Cornwall and a lot of it is now heritage land and no one can touch it (except windmill barons) Most of that Land is on the sites of hundreds of tin mines that up to a hundred years ago was polluted industrial land, it was then abandoned when Tin became cheaper to produce abroad and nature has now totally reclaimed that land.
So he’s doing a Huhne – getting a female to take the rap.
“Diane Abbott quits MPs’ abortion counselling group.”
Her mother should have taken their avice
+ d
I SAY
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Is this a mnemonic for something?
Stick SALAD up his fat lardy arse!
Intern’s main task: daily collections from Greggs/KFC/McDonalds/Burgerking/chip shop/hotdog stand.
Take me hard big boys!
Tom Watson can jog on.
I doubt Tom Watson could jog across to the remote control without risking a heart-attack.
The most amusing and sad aspect is that nobody really cares or believes what Watson writes let alone the cods wallop he spouts.
What a TiT!
I seem to remember that in this very place, there were reports of Watson’s wider family being widely deployed in local politics, courtesy of the taxpayer – anyone recall or am I thinking of someone else equally as fragrant?
Mmm, he used to employ me for about £25 K p.a., plus expenses, plus pension. But now he’s divorced me to spend more time with his interns, all that has stopped. Still, I’ll get half the profits from his new self-congratulatory book on phone scandals!
How will you spend the £50?
Hint: Labiaplasty costs more than that.
Watson’s Intern job application.
Previous experience working for Mcdonalds would be very advantageous.
oh dear… as if Tom Watson needed another way to be made to look a twat…
Of course the other explanation could be that it was indeed Watson that wrote the tweet… then, 15 minutes later regretted it.
I am sure it would not be the first time that a politician has blamed their underling for an error they made themselves.
Too easy.. must resist.. that intern was a gift like no other in history in comparison to other twatter stories.
Do we know the identity of this “intern” ?
I suppose its a bit more convincing than saying the cat did it.
oooooh Tom, I want to be your new intern and watch your cock saluting Hitler! Emma Reynolds’ muff just isn’t fun for me anymore!