November 3rd, 2011

Ed ♥ Ellie 4 Ever

Tuesday night saw the Aneurin Bevan Memorial Lecture in Parliament, with Ed Balls taking to stage. Having been unable to convince any of his Shadow Cabinet colleagues to take on Labour’s famous-for-Twitter foghorn Ellie Gellard as a Political Adviser, she’s instead writing his speeches, despite her being officially recorded as a staffer to Kerry McCarthy. Guido hears that it wasn’t for want of trying though…

Gellard has maintained a behind the scenes profile despite ruining Labour’s manifesto launch May 2010. Regular readers will remember her “Gordon is fantastic” speech unraveling in minutes after it emerged that she had previously called for his resignation in less than flattering terms. Since then Gellard has been the Team Balls cheerleader and her loyalty was rewarded on Tuesday with Balls heaping praise on his young admirer:

“I am not going to start this lecture by quoting from the current generation of Labour greats who have paid tribute to Nye Bevan – but by quoting from one of the next younger generation of Bevanites. Because I have been helped in researching this lecture by a young Bristol graduate, Ellie Gellard, the young woman who Labour chose to introduce Labour’s last manifesto in a new hospital in Birmingham. And the name on Twitter she goes by? ‘Bevanite Ellie’.”

And then again:

“That is why, I argued, Nye Bevan deserves the title of Labour’s greatest hero. And what greater tribute to the great man than that he is still a hero today – his name evoked by a new generation to describe their approach to politics. Ladies and gentlemen – just ask Bevanite Ellie… Thank you”

Enough to make a young girl blush…


  1. 1
    Gordon Brown Stuff says:

    Foghorn Leghorn

  2. 2
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Mcdonalds not hiring then?

  3. 3
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:


  4. 4
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    “, Ellie Gellard, the young woman who Labour chose to introduce Labour’s last manifesto in a new hospital in Birmingham”

    are sure thats right?

    I mean launching a manifesto at a hosptial?

    Then again you would have to sick to vote for Labour.

  5. 5
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    The last line might be coment of the day. what do you think?

  6. 6
    Billy's career advisor says:

    You probably get paid more working security and you don’t have to socially interact with anybody. Also at McD’s you can’t spend the whole day on the internet hitting F5. I think you should stay where you are.

  7. 7
    Larry The Cat says:

    Obviously dropped on her head when she was a baby!

  8. 8
    Selohesra says:

    There was a young slapper called Gellard
    Who wrote speaches for some Labour retard
    When it comes to some fun
    I’d give her one
    Just the thought and I’m now going hard

  9. 9
    Selohesra says:

    what on earth is that modded for?

  10. 10
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    There are few things less appealing than watching a deeply unattractive married older man making a fool of himself over a younger woman.

    In politics it seems to be everywhere though – other than this particular instance all you have to do is turn up at one of Handycock’s constituency surgeries or follow Tom Watson around the bars of Soho and Westminster.

  11. 11
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    I tweet aswell

    You can follow me if you lick

  12. 12
    Mike Handycock says:

    I could off her a job under me. :)

  13. 13
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    Is Huhne more delusional than McTwat? The article from Guido’s links suggests it is becoming a close run thing. Perhaps if Huhne starts gnawing the carpets and barking at the traffic he might just get his nose in front.

  14. 14
    Loungelizard says:

    Could Upchucka not get her on his shift at KFC?

  15. 15
    Ellie makes all the boys Hard says:

    Guido, please post that photo again of a three sheets to the wind Ellie bent over in a short skirt.

  16. 16
    The voice of unreason says:

    I’m sure Ed’s done a lot of other things that would make a young girl blush!

  17. 17
    Luciana Burgerking says:

    She’s going no where near his shaft

  18. 18
    Ellie makes all the boys Hard says:

    Ellie talking out of her arse.

  19. 19
    Cedric says:

    Aneurine Bevan was a fraudster and black marketeer during the Second World War:

    Gay Labour MP and Soviet Spy Tom Driburg also claimed to have seduced Bevan in his office at Westminter ….

    Clearly a load of Balls.

  20. 20
    Foghorn Leghorn says:

    Heh Heh That’s a joke, son. Now sod, Ah say, sod off there, you imbecile, and don’t wish me any luck.

  21. 21
    Gordon Brown says:

    Does anyone have a plan of the Cannes Conference Centre kitchens?

  22. 22
    can't be arsed to Google it says:

    “And what greater tribute to the great man than that he is still a hero today”

    Who the fuck was Nye Bevan?

  23. 23
    Gordon Brown says:

    I will be remembered as a far greater prime minister than Thatcher. When I die, there should be a state funeral.

  24. 24
    Ben says:

    Did she turn you down Guido? You’re just jealous because her good looks will get to her the top of the Labour Party, whereas your ugly mug …

  25. 25
    Miss Anthropist says:

    She somehow survived the abortion process. That, or her DNA is not quite damaged enough to have caused a miscarriage.

  26. 26
    nell says:

    Ah aneurinbevan.

    A supporter of marx and mosely and a man that Churchill called ‘ a squalid nuisance’

    I’m not at all surprised that balls thinks he’s his hero – they sound awfully similar.

  27. 27
    Dr Conrad Murray says:

    Why does a woman called Sarah Brown keep phoning to beg me to become her husband’s doctor?

  28. 28
    Aneurysm Bevan says:

    As long as she shows up sober, that’s half the battle won right there… I should know.

  29. 29
    Miss Anthropist says:

    No, not really.

    But launching Labour’s manifesto at a hospital makes perfect sense. That way they could get it straight into intensive care and onto life support.

  30. 30
    nell says:

    gurninggordon needs to be content in the knowledge that virtually the whole world believes he was the worst most disastrous pm the uk has ever had.

  31. 31
    I only come here to view Comment of the Day says:

    It’s as good as they come.

  32. 32
    Ed Balls says:

    She gives good head.

  33. 33
    Ed Balls says:

    need you to work late tonight. I have something that you need to get your teeth into. Its not a big thing but it should prove a handful for a woman of your talents. I have very confidence in you that you can lick this if you try.

    remember not a word to Yvette

    your very own Obergruppenführer

  34. 34
    Labour idolise murderers says:

    Balls probably still has a Che Guevara t-shirt in his wardrobe.

  35. 35
    James says:

    I still would, though.

  36. 36
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

  37. 37
    Ellie Gellard says:

    Will you wear your SS uniform again, mein Fuhrer?


  38. 38
    David Cameron says:

    Up until I came along.

  39. 39
    Real Estate Cult says:

    Apart from about 35% of the British public who would still be fucking stupid enough to vote for him.

  40. 40
    Ed Balls says:

    Ja vol. But remember, when you’re with me, your name is Eva. Heil Hitler!

  41. 41
    SpAd says:

    Labour broke electoral law by launching their manifesto in the new QE Hospital in Birmingham – using NHS property for party-political purposes isn’t allowed.

    When they were pulled up on using the hospital – despite every speaker on the day referring to the overpriced PFI monstrosity as an example of Labour’s amazingness – they claimed that because the hospital wasn’t “finished” it was still technically a building site.

    Lying Labour liars.

  42. 42
  43. 43
    Nye T-Shirt On Order says:

    As lefties all adore the murder Che or the mass-murderer Mao they think highly of anybody who says they are “socialist”

    To be a hero to Liebore you have you just have to be either a liar or, well, unpleasant.

  44. 44
    Wiki says:

    Wing forward?

  45. 45
    Smig says:

    Is she fucking Balls?

  46. 46
    legal alien says:

    He must be dipping it in her

  47. 47
    Nye Bevan says:

    Obviously you’ve never used the NHS.

  48. 48

    Beauty fades. Stupidity lasts forever.

  49. 49
    Smig says:

    He played Outside Centre for Llanelli.

  50. 50
    I Got Bored Of Having A Hundred Monikers.... says:

    Time to get on telly burning EU flags and holding signs calling the Germans Nazis and watch it catch on to put the spooks up the EUrocrats.

  51. 51
    Frank Hughes says:

    Readers might be amused to learn that my late father ( born 14.12.1912 the night the Titanic sank ! ) used to refer to that man as ‘Urinal’ Bevan :)

  52. 52
    Frank Hughes says:

    Sorry ! Should have read 14.04.1912

  53. 53
    Unite Spokesperson says:

    Charlie Whelan will be jealous

  54. 54
    I Got Bored Of Having A Hundred Monikers.... says:

    Well it’s hardly a bold statement there seeing Jacqui Smith and Margaret Beckett and the rest of the Blair Babes (Munters) where once at the top of the labour party as well……….

  55. 55
    Pawn Sandwich says:

    Believe it or not, he sold 400 tons of gold and went long on the €uro with the proceeds – then he writes that article.

    A very confused individual to say the least.

  56. 56
    Sir William Waad says:

    “That is why, I argued, Nye Bevan deserves the title of Labour’s greatest hero.”

    Bevan was a drunk who screwed up health care in this country for at least 70 years.

  57. 57
    Tony says:

    I’ll attend, if I can fit it in; bung-hunting and all that, you understand, there’s a good fellow.

  58. 58
    I Got Bored Of Having A Hundred Monikers.... says:

    The Guy doesn’t know what day it is he is that dosed up on drugs. Plus it was Sue’s husband that got Gordo to sell the gold so a certain company could make £££££££££££££££££££££££££

  59. 59
    I Remember You Hoo says:

    “her good looks will get to her the top of the Labour Party”

    Maybe so, it certainly will not be her brain though. But then, the average Labour voter is as thick as pigshit, so will hardly notice such minor failing.

  60. 60
    Ed Balls says:

    I want to redistribute my wealth all over Ellie Gerard’s face.

  61. 61
    I Remember You Hoo says:

    Aye, next to the Shickelgruber outfit he is so fond of, no doubt.

  62. 62
    Ghost of Nye Bevan says:

    I was a man of principle. I supported the Gulags in USSR.

  63. 63
    Goldman Sachs says:

    We don’t forget such generousity, unfortunately there are no posts available for Mr. Brown within our esteemed organisation at present, that match his unique skill set.
    If one does becomes available before he dies or is sectioned, we will look most favourably upon his application to join us in a suitable role.

  64. 64
    La' says:

    No, she’s fucking bonkers

  65. 65
    SpAd says:

    That would account for Tom’s recent gelled-quiff-and-Prada-spec-frames makeover. Unfortunately, Trinny & Susannah stand little chance against Ben & Jerry.

  66. 66
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    Or indeed Scottish and Newcastle.

  67. 67
    Don Quikong says:

    Balls is trying to flatter her because his career is failing. The British public are wise to him and no student politician can help him.

    He should be talking to factory workers instead of party stooges.

  68. 68
    Mornington Crescent says:

    That photo makes more sense if you invert it…

  69. 69
    Yvette Cooper says:

    He goes too fast, but not all that deep.

  70. 70
    Handycock (Teen Fondler) says:

    Try me love. I’m famous for it.

  71. 71
    Geoff, England says:

    But with all the free lunches he’s shovelled down his throat during his political career, his clothes have probably shrunk a few sizes since his uni days. So he might as well use his Che T-shirt to clean the car or wipe his arse.

  72. 72
    Robert Catesby says:

    I’d smash her back door in.

  73. 73
    Robert Catesby says:


  74. 74
    Mr Quelch says:

    You misspelt speeches so it’s your own fault.

  75. 75
    The Golem says:

    Thanks for the links, Cedric. Genuinely interesting in both cases.

  76. 76
  77. 77
    Stupid little girl says:

    Shes a graduate in what, Fuckwittery ?

  78. 78
    St Vince of Cable says:

    Who are you refering to ?

  79. 79
    Big Boy says:

    She sounds as though she needs shutting up and I have just the thing to do it with.

  80. 80
    Anonymous says:

    Doesnt surprise me as this behaviour is endemic in Politics.

  81. 81
    Tom Baldwin's Liebour Ajax supplier says:

    she looks about 12 years old…though around near where l was born under liebours successful 13 years in power would men should would have 3 kids by that age and enjoying her free council house and benfits!

  82. 82
    Anonymous says:

    Some union arsehole was on tv last night claiming the pension reforms where the biggest pensions Robbery in history. The tribal c unt obviously forgot about Browns raid on the private pensions or Browns enabler Robert Maxwell.
    Utter wanker.

  83. 83
    Sir Aston Martin says:


    Of Driberg:

    Despite his homosexuality he did in fact get married in 1951. His choice of bride being one Ena Binfield, who was reputedly extremely plain. This allowed Winston Churchill the opportunity to quip that “buggers can’t be choosers” whilst an unnamed Commons policeman is said to have commiserated with the future Mrs Driberg with the words “Poor lady, she won’t know which way to turn”.

    Remind you of anyone?

  84. 84
    Gellard the Scrounger says:

    She writes Miliband speeches? No wonder they are shite. Labour do good speeches even if they’re full of bullshit. Ed conference speech, however was appalling. That speech managed alienate everyone including Ed’s wife.

  85. 85
    Henry Crun says:

    To look at her you’d think Balls would come in her mouth.

  86. 86
    Plink says:

    If he can find any that is… of either factories or workers.

  87. 87
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    Was it operating as a hospital at the time? Full quota of pilgrims, 2 administrators for each patient, HAI endemic, that sort of thing?

  88. 88
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    Obviously not often enough.

  89. 89
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    I can get you a map of the broom cupboards for a small consideration.

  90. 90
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    We should be able to manage a street party here and there.

  91. 91
    Basil the Cat says:

    What, after Ed Balls has been hanging out of it?

  92. 92
    Polly Seewonk says:

    Without my glasses I misread it as:
    “Enough to make a young girl’s bush?”

  93. 93
    Peter Carter-Fuck says:

    Buy her a Bacardi Breezer and you’ll have the chance.

  94. 94
    Peter Carter-Fuck says:

    Bad news for Ed, Olive Oyl is at home sharpening her carving knife. If she can find his tiny little dick he might be in for a Bobbitting.

  95. 95
    Peter Carter-Fuck says:

    Looks like Bevan was a typical Labour trougher and bummer. At least PresHunt only fucks ladies whilst he stuffs his gob with the food he steals from us.

  96. 96
    Jimmy says:

    An attack on the wise and beautiful Ms. Gellard? Have you no decency?

  97. 97
    Old Crone says:

    Beautiful? Should have gone to Specsavers.

  98. 98
    The Observer says:

    “Nye Bevan deserves the title of Labour’s greatest hero”
    Crikey these left wing thugs wear their hearts on someone else’s sleeve – whatever happened to Atlee et al.

  99. 99
    The Observer says:

    Deeply unattractive?
    You are too kind.
    Truly ugly would be more honest.

  100. 100
    The Observer says:

    Written by Tony for a bet.

  101. 101
    The Observer says:

    It is called deliberate non-retentive memory syndrome and is common in all political parties but especially the last Labour government.
    Problem for them is that the new digital world has not got totally through to them yet.

  102. 102
    Jimmy says:

    Careful. That’s the next Mrs. Jimmy you’re talking about there.

  103. 103
    Atar says:

    Is it only me that finds teenie leftoid stepford types like Ellie creepy beyond belief?

  104. 104
    Baddabing says:

    Reductio ad Hitlerum

  105. 105
    twx says:

    Balls must be shagging her. That’s probably why Yvette’s so depressed again.

  106. 106
    A* GCSE History student says:

    There’s a bizarre statue of someone called Aneurin Bevan in (possibly quite appropriately) Queen’s Street, Cardiff, posed in a ‘prominent arse’ style which suggests Jonny Wilkinson contemplating a conversion from the touchline. Apart from the fact that his head is permanently covered in pigeon shit, I can tell you very little about the fellow.

  107. 107
    Anonymous says:

    Doesn’t go very fast at all, and as for ‘deep’ – I’ve seen puddles of warm piss that had more depth than Ed Balls.

  108. 108
    Ellie Gellard Ph. D says:

    Modern dance or some such thing

  109. 109
    Old Crone says:

    Next? So you’ve already failed once?

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Alan Milburn says Labour’s scaremongering campaign for an unreformed NHS will not win election…

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