October 12th, 2011

Jobs for the Boys


124 Comments

  1. 1
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    LOL

    Now i now we are fooked ;-)

    Like

  2. 2
    Tax Payer says:

    I’ve heard you can’t slip a business card between Fox and Werritty.

    Like

  3. 3
    Selohesra says:

    So do you advise him up the arse as well?

    Like

  4. 4
    Redpen says:

    Shouldn’t that be ‘Advisor’.

    Like

  5. 5
    Millibands Munters says:

    I wonder how many cards he has in phone boxes.

    Like

  6. 6
    BaggPuss says:

    Excellent. I’ve made several cards so I’m off now to open doors.

    Like

  7. 8
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Will one of those cards get me into Lords for free?

    Like

  8. 10
    The heir to Blair says:

    Apparently works better on back doors than front doors

    Like

  9. 12
    Jesme the unloved Fox says:

    Has the fragrant Liam got pederastic copy of fellow ministers?

    Like

  10. 17
    Joss Taskin says:

    Will a card like that get me First Class flights all over the World ??

    Like

  11. 18
    Rat's arse says:

    Ed balls on Parliament channel, making a complete & utter tw*t of himself.

    Like

  12. 19
    Kered Ybretsae says:

    Careful dahlings….otherwise could be Gay Fawkes!

    Like

  13. 20
    Voice of Reason says:

    Surely Dr Liar Fox would have been more correct o the business card.

    Like

    • 35
      annette curton says:

      A graphic depicting a pack of hounds chasing it into its lair would be rather good (The Disappearing Fox Tattoo).

      Like

    • 37
      annette curton says:

      A graphic depicting a pack of hounds chasing it into its lair would be rather good (The Disapp+aring Fox Tattoo).

      Like

  14. 21
    Billy No Balls says:

    It appears that some MPs are claiming the the new expenses regime is leaving them out of pocket. It’s a bit like me claiming that travelling into work every week leaves me out of pocket as my employer doesn’t pay my train fare in each week.
    Of course Diane “do as I say not as I do” Abbot is under the impression that most employers pay for their staff to get a taxi home each night.

    Like

    • 84
      Tax Payer says:

      They claim they spend 20% of their time on expenses paperwork, and 10 hours of an assistant’s time. And the stress of it all is causing psychological problems.

      WTF are they doing?

      Car – £x
      Rent – £x
      Staff – £x
      Stationary – £x

      30 minutes max per week. What else is there to do??

      Like

    • 112
      Well it's a thought says:

      Can’t understand why the don’t do what were all forced to do, expenses paid as per HMRC regulations, simple ,but then they would have no excuses or sympathy , don’t you know were all in this together.

      Like

  15. 28
    Thrilled to be near says:

    On the back of all of Andrew’s cards I understand there’s a discreet reference to his length.

    I’ve heard it’s a nine-incher.

    Can you confirm?

    Like

  16. 29
    Lord Prescotts of Birds Eye says:

    So that Pikey fook, Fawkes likes it oop his foocken arsepipe too, I always fooken knew that yeh Oirish fook

    Like

  17. 32
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    At least this proves the Tories right that ID cards were a waste of money!

    Like

  18. 36

    Dave’s got another Fag. That’s what you get at Eton right? Fags?

    Like

  19. 38

    You know what? Fuck it, I think I am going to get some cards printed, what are they going to do charge me with Fraud, No because his buddy got away with it so can you. At the very least it would make a great story. The duplicity of justice.

    Like

  20. 44
    Jabba the Cat says:

    Any chance of getting hold of the cellar keys for the 5th of November?

    Like

  21. 50
    Engineer says:

    Can’t help feeling that this story is being squeezed for every last drop of speculation by some in the MSM in order to avoid talking about the problems in the Euro zone. Sure, it’s a story, and might be a political scandal, so it should be reported, but I can’t help feeling that the Euro has the potential to blow up into the biggest financial crisis in living memory. Surely that deserves more air-time and column inches (no double entendre intended)?

    (Guido at least has an excuse – he’s quite upfront about blogging rumour and tittle-tattle, not serious political issues.)

    Like

    • 58
      sockpuppet #4 says:

      The euro problems are drawn out, small things happen here and there and theres no great conclusion. Its also technical, detailed, and not easy to explain. Its boring and theres no scope for any kind of cock joke.

      Like

    • 63
      Trinny says:

      For those of us too young to remember 1929, it already is the biggest financial crisis in living memory.

      Like

  22. 51

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-15267426 – See how hard it is being an MP you make 3 times the average salary and they make it impossible for you to claim your scotch egg and new sofa! It is enough to make a man go wild I tell you!

    Like

    • 72
      Lord Michael Caine says:

      Report of how hard its for MPs to now steal from taxpayer by ‘Dr Ira Madan’ you could not make this stuff up.

      Like

  23. 53
    Ah! Monika says:

    How do you get the cards to print?

    Like

  24. 56
  25. 57
    Portaloo says:

    Where Werrity got his globetrotter’s gold is one thing. For Ministerial propriety, what also matters though is where Fox believed Werrity’s wonga came from.

    To have tortured the English language into “When it comes to the pecuniary interests of Mr Werritty in those conferences, I am absolutely confident that he was not dependent on any transactional behaviour to maintain his income” Fox must have known in some detail where the Werrity wonga came from, such detail in fact that he can be “absolutely confident” that it wasn’t whatever the tortured language of the second clause actually means.

    Mr Fox should therefore be able to brief GOD quite comprehensively on Werrity’s financial affairs.

    Like

  26. 64
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Like

  27. 68
    Pretty in Pink says:

    But why would any hetro sexual male want a card that is saying they bat for the other side?

    Like

    • 85
      Gok Wan Kered says:

      Get with it, darling! The ladies feel safe in the company of a poof. I have spent the last 25 years fondling, caressing, perving and gawping at their naked forms. Straight as a fucking die, me.

      Like

  28. 71
    Billy Bowden is the world's greatest umpire! says:

    DOWNING STREET PRESS RELEASE

    Right you chavie blackberry users.. lets see if you can organise a riot now you twats.

    love

    David Cameron

    Sent from my iphone

    Like

  29. 73
    YorkshireLad says:

    Folks who want to work with children are subject to more scrutiny than these tossers

    Like

  30. 78
    right in the clinks says:

    Balls is get a tremendous kicking in the Commons.

    Like

  31. 87
    Harry Harman says:

    Sexism!

    Like

  32. 92
    Gender Neutral Transexual on the BBC says:

    Oi!

    Like

  33. 97
    Adviser for Ed Miliband says:

    Ed Miliband to get a proper suit along with some real policies. Another nose job that works.

    Like

  34. 107
    nell says:

    ****Laugh****

    http://www.smh.com.au/business/brown-pushes-for-27-trillion-rescue-pot-20111012-1lkxo.html

    gordon says we should all give the EU $2.74trillion!!!

    anybody fancy a business card with “Advisor to Gordon Brown the deluded man of kirkcaldy on it”?

    Like

  35. 115
    Iranian Revolutionary Guards' Al-Quds Brigade says:

    Greetings Mr Fawkes,

    We are very keen to meet with you and see if you can facilitate access to Dr Fox to discuss a possible deal involving military supplies to the Islamic Republic. We are also interested in discussing an additional contract to have certain individuals “taken care of” in the US.

    Looking forward to our meeting in Dubai,

    Yours sincerely etc etc

    Like

    • 118
      Adam Oddity says:

      Hi,
      I’m a consultant to Dr Fox {small print -the D-J Dr Fox} and there’s much we should discuss. The Iranian Revolutionary Guards’ Al-Quds Brigade is an organisation that I could do some business with. I’ll be in Dubai, but if you cannot meet there, just check the minister’s schedule on yougov, and I won’t be far away.
      Yours,
      Mr Oddity.

      PS – I understand that you have some reservations in your culture about homosexuality.
      I would like to reassure you that this is just a front we use to disguise profiteering from ministerial office.

      Like

  36. 116
    aboukir says:

    In 1994 the editor of the Guardian newspaper, Peter Preston, was reprimanded for impersonating the MP Jonathan Aitken by sending a fax on House of Commons notepaper.

    Journalistic standards eh ? Whatever next – hacking phones ?

    Like

  37. 119
    Andy Pandy Poo says:

    I’ve already registered my fury on another section of this estimable blog. Barry of Bournemouth has dropped me right in it by saying he knew nothing about my activities and was shocked.

    Shocked? This is the man who shared my bed on his wedding night! This is the man who said he’d care for me till the day he died! This is the man to whom I dedicated my nine-incher!

    Talk about ingratitude. I’m trying to think of a way of getting back at him. Can anyone help?

    Like

  38. 120
    Pedant says:

    Guido – no such word as ‘advisOr’ – should know better!!!!

    Like

  39. 123
    Scots Jimmy says:

    Does the logo represent the House of Commons or the sign over a City of Westminster public urinal?

    Like


Seen Elsewhere

Does Europe Really Want Britain to Quit? | Nick Wood
Immigration Nation | Hopi Sen
Tories Choose Anti-Israel Candidate in Rochester | JC
Osborne’s Daycare Obsession is a Time Bomb | Kathy Gyngell
BBC Marr Pinko Trying to Ban the Queen | Speccie
Eric Hobsbawm: Companion of Dishonour | Standpoint
Guido Party Gossip | Iain Dale
Russell Brand Comes Out as 9/11 Truther | Guardian
Health Revolution is Underway | Fraser Nelson
UKIP Gets Professional | Red Box
Kelly Tolhurst Wins Rochester Open Primary | BBC


VOTER-RECALL
Find out more about PLMR


Austrian Chancellor Werner Faymann on Cameron’s refusal to pay the £1.7 billion EU bill by December 1st:

“Well, then he’s gonna pay on December 2nd”



Mycroft says:

Have you read the last bit of Animal Farm?

You know where the animals are looking through the Farmhouse window?

My TV screen was that window at lunch-time today.

Be careful, the sudden self-congratulatory tone, the slightly pudgy outline of indulgence and you become exactly what you should despise.

The jolly face of the Quisling Cameron poses for your camera has mesmerised and deceived you, you who were once not so deceived.

You were no firebrand, you were a damp squib in my opinion, sorry.

You need a damned good kick up the ahse!


Tip off Guido
Web Guido's Archives

Subscribe me to:






RSS




AddThis Feed Button
Archive


Labels
Guido Reads
Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,544 other followers