Fortnum & Paul Mason

Look out for tonight’s Newsnight report from Comrade Mason who has spent the weekend sipping Molotov cocktails with Laurie Penny. For Mason these last few months have been an exciting period, reporting on a revolution which has Tweeted its way from Tahir Square to Trafalgar Square. Sometimes from dangerous territory with guerrilla protestors taking on tanks and now with those who think smashing up teacakes in front of old ladies is the moral equivalent.

Comrade Mason Live on the Frontline

Sometimes it has been as if he was broadcasting from Karl Marx’s bedroom – actually he did do that – embedded with friends this weekend his report should be an interesting exercise in straining impartiality. On his blog he let slip that: “At Fortnum and Mason the demonstrators who took it over are trying to get out, texting me…”. Above is our reconstruction of Mason in deep cover disguise this weekend…

Dave’s McTory Doom

Guido doesn’t normally delve in to second division politics unless there is a mad power-crazed coke-head on the run, but the Scottish Tories aren’t exactly having a good start to their election campaign. Not only have they had a million pounds of funding withdrawn, they have somehow managed to lose not one or two, but three candidates before their official launch this morning. Those that said their useless leader Annabel Goldie should have gone months ago are certainly having the last laugh.

Glasgow Councillor David Meikle seems to have kicked over the apple-cart, citing the Tories refusal to investigate allegations of vote rigging as the reason he is walking. The other two have left on slightly less noble terms. Last week Malcolm Macaskill, was sacked after past financial troubles emerged and Iain Whyte resigned his candidacy so he could carry on working for the NHS. Needless to say the much touted Cameron rejuvenation of the Tories in Scotland isn’t expected any time soon.

The LibDems aren’t having much luck either. Veteran Edinburgh MSP Mike Pringle has been caught with his hand in the till and Hugh O’Donnell MSP cowardly quit when he realised he was going to lose. And there’s still a month to go…

Ed Miliband’s Split Screen Speech Horror – Remixed

Quote of the Day

Dan Hodges writes…

“Labour’s leadership team have a new narrative, one that charges Cameron and Osborne are trying to drag us back to the 1980s. They’re right, they are. And the reason they’re trying to do that is the eighties was a period of total, uninterrupted, unassailable Tory domination, and total, uninterrupted, unprecedented Labour failure.”

Tories Turn Screws on MacShame

Four years before the likely General Election the Tories have decided to very publicly select a candidate in Rotherham. Officially the Party’s “Parliamentary Spokesman” for Denis MacShane’s seat, Jackie Whiteley fought it at the last election, increasing the Conservative vote to 16.7% pushing the LibDems into take second place.

It’s almost as if they are planning for a by-election…

Tory Bagcarriers Census Sleepover

Overblown comparisons to the suffragette movement seem to be all the rage this weekend. After Miliband’s “I have a dream speech” one parliamentary bag-carrier took things a step further. Emily Davidson slept in parliament on the night of 1911 census to highlight the issue of votes for women, and a number of Tory researchers did the same last night to apparently highlight the that “overbearing government is the big issue of the day.” One emailed Guido early this morning to tell him:

“Ordinary people are being increasingly spied on by government snoopers. I wanted to take a stand and highlight the need for parliament to defend our civil liberties. Obviously it’s illegal to refuse to do the census or to lie, so my protest enables me to be honest with the Office of National Statistics without telling them anything about where I live.”

It seems Big Brother Watch have found a different bag-carrier with the same idea. That’ll show ‘em.

UPDATE: It is the head of the household is responsible for accurately completing the forms – not the individuals. Guido very much hopes that Mr Bercow has accurately filled in his forms with all residents of the estate last night because it would be rather unfortunate if he were to be prosecuted and fined £1,000 for incorrectly completing them.

Rich & Mark’s Monday Morning View



Tip offs: 0709 284 0531
team@Order-order.com

Quote of the Day

David Cameron tells MPs after voting:

“Wouldn’t miss this for the world. Secret ballots very important. Remember the Chartists.”

Top Posts This Week

Guidogram: Sign up

Subscribe to the most succinct 7 days a week daily email read by thousands of Westminster insiders.

Facebook

WALTER MITTY CV OF ANTI-FRACKING CANDIDATE WALTER MITTY CV OF ANTI-FRACKING CANDIDATE
Cassetteboy v Cameron and Farage Cassetteboy v Cameron and Farage
MICROSOFT SHAKES DOWN PUBLIC SECTOR FOR DOSH MICROSOFT SHAKES DOWN PUBLIC SECTOR FOR DOSH
WATCH: Toby Young Skewers Labour Zero Hours Contract Attack Line WATCH: Toby Young Skewers Labour Zero Hours Contract Attack Line
MAIL TRICKED INTO QUOTING BATMAN FILM IN PLANE CRASH COVERAGE MAIL TRICKED INTO QUOTING BATMAN FILM IN PLANE CRASH COVERAGE
ANTI-FRACKING PARLIAMENTARY CANDIDATE WANTED TO WORK FOR FRACKERS ANTI-FRACKING PARLIAMENTARY CANDIDATE WANTED TO WORK FOR FRACKERS

Crick Gets Paxo’d Crick Gets Paxo’d
Cameron’s Secret A-List Cameron’s Secret A-List
Corrections and Clarifications: Brooks Newmark Corrections and Clarifications: Brooks Newmark
What is Wrong With the Lobby? What is Wrong With the Lobby?
Arrogant Bercow: “I’m Not Going Anywhere” Arrogant Bercow: “I’m Not Going Anywhere”
GOVERNMENT SHELLS OUT FOR PHOTO OF DEAD ZEBRA GOVERNMENT SHELLS OUT FOR PHOTO OF DEAD ZEBRA
DWP Press Office Wins the Internet DWP Press Office Wins the Internet
Two-Faced Chuka Ruins Labour Attack Ad Two-Faced Chuka Ruins Labour Attack Ad
Cameron Mauls Miliband at PMQs Cameron Mauls Miliband at PMQs
Actual Pub Landlord Likes Farage Actual Pub Landlord Likes Farage
Dave’s SNP Poodle Zinger Dave’s SNP Poodle Zinger
GREEDY SOLAR INDUSTRY WANTS MORE PUBLIC CASH GREEDY SOLAR INDUSTRY WANTS MORE PUBLIC CASH
This is the worst thing the LibDems  have ever done This is the worst thing the LibDems have ever done
CLIMATE CHANGE FUELLED MOSQUITOES ARE NOT COMING TO GET YOU CLIMATE CHANGE FUELLED MOSQUITOES ARE NOT COMING TO GET YOU
ORDNANCE SURVEY OPENS UP DATA MAPPING TREASURE CHEST ORDNANCE SURVEY OPENS UP DATA MAPPING TREASURE CHEST
“I’d S**k Off David Cameron” “I’d S**k Off David Cameron”
WATCH: Cameron Heckled By Pensioners WATCH: Cameron Heckled By Pensioners
WATCH: Gove v Campbell WATCH: Gove v Campbell
Politician dumps his wife over sexy selfies Politician dumps his wife over sexy selfies
UKIP PROTESTERS ORGANISED BY GREEN LOBBYIST UKIP PROTESTERS ORGANISED BY GREEN LOBBYIST
You’ve Been Cricked! You’ve Been Cricked!
He’s Not Dancing Anymore He’s Not Dancing Anymore
Miliband’s Hedge Funder Hypocrisy Miliband’s Hedge Funder Hypocrisy
NATIONAL TRUST CLAIMS CLIMATE CHANGE IS “BIGGEST THREAT” NATIONAL TRUST CLAIMS CLIMATE CHANGE IS “BIGGEST THREAT”