March 14th, 2011

Hague Tacos the Big Issues

Despite a weekend of declaring he’s not going anywhere, critics are still circling around Hague again this morning. Imagine the hail of twitter-righteousness if Steve Bell had drawn this cartoon for the Mail or this blog. Why the double standards for Guardian scribbles?

High up the list of things that Hague might find it a bit tricky to live down was his rash declaration that Gadaffi was on his way to Venezuela soon after the uprising began in Libya.  Guido’s man in Vauxhall Cross explains the confusion. MI6 had briefed him that they had intercepted a mobile phone conversation that had one of Gaddafi’s close staff speaking Spanish and using “code words”. The spooks deduced that he was almost certainly preparing Gaddafi’s flight to see his old chum Hugo Chavez in Venezuela. Obviously.

Turns out the man was actually ordering a take-away meal of burritos and tacos from the Café Caracas in Tripoli. Apparently.


  1. 1
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Didnt he say Mad dog wanted a Vuvuzela?

  2. 2
    the last quango in paris says:

    surely then the blame should be with the spook who is crap at spanish? (unless a code work is taco or re-fried rice)

  3. 3
    Socialists = Sociopaths says:

    ‘Why the double standards for Guardian scribbles?’

    Hypocrisy and mendacity – it’s in Liebour’s D-N-A.

  4. 4
    T.B£iar - the People's Messiah says:

    ‘Turns out the man was actually ordering a take-away meal of burritos and tacos from the Café Caracas in Tripoli.’

    When MI6 thought that Saddam was talking about ‘Weapons of Mass Destruction, capable of delivery within 45 minutes’, maybe he was actually asking the local burger shop for ‘ Woppers of Mass Proportions, delivered within 45 minutes’ ??

  5. 5
    Lt. Gen. Bertie Farquarson says:

    Who cares… He’s not the sort of chap we’d allow in the mess. But then, nor is “Call me Dave” Cameron!

    The country started going down when they invited the wrong sort of chaps into the House of Lords.

  6. 6
    Held's Green Book says:

    The Guardian is a special case. It makes it’s money from dodgy investments, tax loopholes and startling hypocrisy, therefore it’s not really a commercial newspaper. Instead it is a medium through which instructions are sent to evil Drones.

  7. 7
    Tax Payer says:

    Suspect the food mis-understanding is actually an embellishment to the story added later to make it ‘funnier’.

  8. 8
    Reducks says:

    He’s a lover, not a fajita.

  9. 9
    Vanishing Point says:

    In the cartoon, who are they meant to be?

  10. 10
    Tax Payer says:

    Why is questioning Gaddafi’s mental state against editorial guidelines, but making homophobic comments ok? Are there no guidelines on that?

  11. 11
    cheshireborn says:


    As a member of the Lib Dems Parliamentary Candidates Assocn Exec he will have had no great influence. Try to talk him up all you like he really wasn’t that significant a figure.

  12. 12
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Same with the policy on tax avoidence.

  13. 13
    Prezza's Belly says:

    I’ll ‘ave ‘arf a dozen.

    An’ if any of youse Soothern poofs mention again that I took money off the most hated newspaper in the world, The Daily Mail, to serialise my piss awful book, I’ll thump yer.

  14. 14
    Anonymous says:

    It’s a Bell cartoon; nobody knows. But he’s hilarious, apparently, so nobody says anything.

  15. 15
    You couldn't make it up says:

    I expect they believe if they keep talking long enough their brains will kick in and they might start making sense, Unfortunately not worked yet chaps…..

  16. 16
    Prezza's Belly says:

    ‘An from Pubic Sector Nowt jobs!
    We piss ‘em we do. Piss ‘em.

  17. 17
    big brother house says:

    Don’t let the fuckers get you down.

    Don’t get mad, get even.

  18. 18
    James Pond says:

    Would this be the same MI6 who said Iraq was littered with WMD?

  19. 19
    Mine d'Boggles says:

    Not only. The old airmail version of the Manchester Guardian served usefully (after reading) as toilet paper in the outside dunnee.

  20. 20
    Tapestry says:

    Hague’s problem is that he thought the Lib Dems would save his butt. Lib Dems are collapsed on 9%, while UKIP’s moving up at 7%. One more quarter, and it will be tother way around. The coalition’s over, boys.

  21. 21
    Loungelizard says:

    Forget Hague’s mojo and Andy’s whatever,the hot topic is still Labours’s involvement with Gaddafi and those slimeballs at LSE, don’t take your eye off Ed’s Balls.

  22. 22
    sockpuppet #4 says:

    I’d like a double order of embellishment with fries. Go easy on the facts.

  23. 23
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Has the PM called a genral election then?

  24. 24
    Anonymous says:

    Possibly Hague has been very badly served on a few things and is being extremely mature and diplomatic to avoid revealing it, including allowing himself to be ridiculed.

  25. 25

    William Hague! Come in out of the rain! Dumbass.

  26. 26
    streamfisher says:

    Saddams room service intercepted calling down a Bombe Surprise for dessert.

  27. 27
    Willsteed says:


    What a fantastic typo. Presumably a parody on why the Guardian is known as the Grauniad?

  28. 28
    Chloe Sal Gerbeeba says:

    Scrap the Propaganda tax and let’s see how long the Gruinard lasts.

  29. 29
    Toilet Papers says:

    Seems to some sort of parallel with football managers receiving the FULL SUPPORT of the Board! Hague’s judgement has to be called into account, its fine to be able to deliver interesting speeches but one has to be able to work and think independently, without the assistance of the backroom staff, at times without making a complete arse of yourself. Something here about empty vessels and a lot of noise, seems to sum up our William pretty well.

  30. 30
    Smig says:

    The most recent funny thing he did was giving Bliar a power-crazed hypnotic eye. In 1995.

  31. 31
    Anonymous says:

    Zactly. While wee Dougie rants away in public. William Hague behaves as a minister should and takes it on the chin for mistakes made by his department. I bet he is kicking arse behind the scenes though.

  32. 32
    Selohesra says:

    indeed – surely the lower the libdems go the longer they will keep coalition alive for in the hope of seeing thro’ to recovery out the other side

  33. 33
    the last quango in paris says:

    It must be the easiest thing in the world being a champagne socialist – leave everything to everyone else to do, this includes bringing up your children and managing you health.
    You have to love everyong regardless of what they’re like and so presumably Gaddafi acts this way because of a bad childhood or bullyng ot something and add to that arrogance (I stopped his having nukes and therefore saved the world ) you can begin to understand their logic.

  34. 34
    Paul Marks says:

    Steve Bell is useful – he shows what evil scum the left really are.

    Back in the 1980s when leftists denied being pro Soviet (i.e. supporters of a regime that had murdered TENS OF MILLIONS of people) I would simply point to the latest Steve Bell cartoons in the Guardian – clearly taking the Soviet side in the Cold War.

    “If you are not proSoviet why do you buy this newspaper?”

    Steve Bell has not changed – he is the same subhuman piece of shit he has always been. The same is true for the people who buy the newspaper for which he works.

  35. 35
    CJ from Eggheads says:


  36. 36
    Paul Marks says:

    Almost needless to say….

    The BBC people (and so on) love Steve Bell – which shows exactly what they are.

  37. 37
    Vlad the Gay Impaler says:

    Why is using the word ” Homo” homophobic?
    I agree with Guido’s remarks if that cartoon had been published in the Mail, there would be squeals of anguish from the left, BBC and all the other shrinking violets.
    We are what we are.
    Bottoms Up
    luv from Vlad

  38. 38
    S Pelling (Miss) says:

    Come to think of it, have Guido and ‘Billy Bowden’ ever been seen in the same room together ?

  39. 39

    Jesus H. Christ! I cannot believe that the spooks who are on this case can’t speak the lingo..?

    I would have thought that was the prime requirement.

  40. 40
    Spoil sport says:

  41. 41

    Say ‘No’ to AV – if only for the Lib Dems’ sake:

  42. 42
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    We have grave concerns about our Parliament be able to make laws that aint overruled in another country!

  43. 43

    Modded so I’ll try again.

    I would have thought that the spoo*s dealing with this would have been able to spe*k the lingo at least.

    We can provide int*rpreters by the shitload for immi*rants from just about every sodding country in the world and yet we cannot tran*late a bloody ph*ne call.

    Seems it’s not just the education system that’s been dumbed down.

    Gawd help us all.

  44. 44
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    this thread aint about the lib Dems or AV

  45. 45
    sockpuppet #4 says:

    Or guido swallowed a tall tale.

  46. 46

    Why’s that Chuka? Do you live there, then?

  47. 47
    Hang the Fucker says:

    Filthy dirty wall street scum saying the human toll is worse than economic toll and we should be grateful of that.

  48. 48
    Help the taxpayer says:

    Why are you against it Chuka? It is being organised by a private company and both Wandsworth and lambeth council tax payers would benefit from the event.

  49. 49
    Aesop o'Sardis says:

    He ought to have the judgement to keep his gob shut on this and the NFZ idea. In the Mail, Max Hastings thinks Obama should say more. Max Hastings is an egotistical tit, of course, but somewhere between Hague and Obama might be about right.

  50. 50
    ???? says:

    Hague has said that a decision is imminent on no-fly zones(whatever the fuck that means)…………

  51. 51
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Whats wrong with that, If its true?

  52. 52
    Mao says:

    Eh he is commenting on a financial channel about the financial effects of the Tsunami. What’s wrong with that?

    Is it dinner break time at the socialist workers party?

  53. 53
    Hang the Fucker says:

    bullshit he’s saying what he really thinks and showing the world that he (along with all his wall street ilk) place more value on artifical constructs like ‘the markets’ than living people and the environment.

  54. 54
    simon r says:

    Just made a complaint to the PCC – suggest others do the same.

  55. 55
    Anonymous says:

    If they wait a couple more days the revolt will be over and a NFZ will be irrelevant?

  56. 56
    speak for england says:

    shouldn’t that be “licking”?

  57. 57
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:


  58. 58

    Are you feeling alright?

  59. 59
    Loungelizard says:

    Is this guy Upchucka for real or what !

  60. 60
  61. 61
    speak for england says:

    nothing empty about billy’s vessel – always had a full complement and an extremely tight fit.

  62. 62
    Old Nick Heavenly (cue Dutrou vids and lots of foaming at the mouth) says:

    As you say, dear.

  63. 63
    Anonymous says:

    Hint: the take away bit isn’t true. It’s been added to make the whole thing more ridiculous, if that’s possible.

  64. 64
    speak for england says:

    just keep clear of the Ron Davies zone

  65. 65
    I'll have some of that says:

    Quite right Chuka. We can’t have “the people” enjoying themselves in your back yard, you keep that for your special friends. But don’t worry. You are destined to be yet another complete twat that walks away from Westminster with a fortune. Lord Chuka of Common (got to stay in touch with the roots). You won’t need to express “deep reservations” about the company you’re forced to keep then.
    Would you care to not share some of your more shallow reservations with us in the meantime?

  66. 66

    Not quite.

    Gaddafi might decide to get revenge on the west for not helping him out by becoming the Go-To guy for illegal entry into Europe.
    “Come,come brothers. I need much cash now evil west stole my pension plan.
    For just $1,000 you get seat on boat, an oar, an I.D card, driving licence, photo of the queen of Denmark, and a muffin basket.
    Hurry hurry..many ferries sailing soon.. Come brethren..start a new life in he paradise of Napoli. Free buses laid on by Italian and French customs..straight to Dover- non stop”.

  67. 67
    On the ball says:

    It seems to be very deep code by a certain “intelligence” agency for keeping mozzies away.

  68. 68
    Joss Ayinglike says:

    The ex Liebour MP, Ron Davies would describe this as a ‘moment of madness’.

  69. 69

    Don’t know what happened. It should work if you try it again.

  70. 70
    Jimmy says:

    “Why the double standards for Guardian scribbles?”

    Their cartoons are funny?

  71. 71
    Titford Hat says:

    Why would someone in Tripoli speak Spanish to the Cafe Caracas?
    Do you speak Mandarin when you go to the Chinky?

  72. 72
    Capt. Shadow (Retd.) - Former MI5 Wet Ops. Team says:

    Quite! – they were always such an embarrassment to us over in Thames House during my time there…

  73. 73
    alan wristbridger says:

    Fuck off homo.

  74. 74
    Titford Hat says:

    He drew penguins with teeth during the Falklands war. Birds with teeth?
    (He wasn’t funny then, BTW. Don’t know if he is now as I never see the Grauniad.)

  75. 75
    bergen says:

    Though I seem to recall he drew a cartoon of Brown as a baby in a nappy.

  76. 76
    misterned says:

    I can envisage the left of the tory party defecting to a left-of-centre Liberal democratic party run by Tim Fallon, just so they can be in a coalition with labour after the next election.

  77. 77
    Hook Line & Sinker says:


  78. 78
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    I meant Guidos Thread.

  79. 79
    the last quango in paris says:

    typical labour – moaning for moaning’s sake! pratt!! how would people camping in clapham turn it into glastonbury??? is beyonce headlining? – how does it mean that people couldnt use the common. why is clapham ‘posher’ than glastonbury? absolutely pathetic – i assume his invite hsnt arrived yet.

  80. 80
    misterned says:

    Will it spoil your cruising and dogging?

  81. 81
    Tapestry says:

    If Lib Dems hit 7% and UKIP goes to 10%, which seems likely given the trends, there will be no point for the Cons in staying inside a dead coalition.

    It would be better to form a live one with UKIP. It won’t matter if the Lib Dems are outside the tent pissing in, if there aren’t any of them left. This is getting like Hitler commanding his phantom divisions to attack the enemy.

    ”But, Sir. They’re all dead.”

    Only Hague and Cameron seem not to have noticed the corpses lining the green benches alongside them. Clegg is literally the Monty Python Dead Parrot. He is no more. He is deceased. He is politically zombified – a late parrot.

  82. 82
    Obviously a man with a broken heart says:

    Ee by gum what to do eh, ‘appen me young SpAd stole me mojo don’t yer know!

  83. 83
    Officer Crabtree of MI5 says:

    Moster Giddawfi woshes to bee some ticos and barritas. We thenk he is flooing to Vinozuela.

  84. 84
    Fa Kin Su Pah says:

    I simply don’t believe a word of it.
    After all we’re the home of clever intelligence.
    If proved wrong I’ll eat my lunch.

  85. 85
    Sir William Waad says:

    第. 我讲广东做您?

  86. 86
    sockpuppet #4 says:

    Are you turning japanese?

  87. 87
  88. 88
    Saville says:

    That one is funnier than the shit from Richard & Mark, I’ll give you that!

    But point is it’s pot&kettle Jimmy, now fuck off ‘cos we don’t take kindly to your types round these parts.

  89. 89
    Sir William Waad says:

    You wouldn’t want it outside your door, I suspect.

  90. 90

    Ah. Feeling silly right now.

  91. 91
    sockpuppet #4 says:

    Quite right.

    I wouldnt like “london” outside my door.

  92. 92
    paul says:

    Oor Willie only has to commit one more monumental cock-up and he’s finished !

  93. 93

    Clearly it was one of Hugo Chavez’s seconded internal security officers.

  94. 94
    the beast of Osaka says:

    “I’m shaking in my boots, hold on….
    Its the building!”

  95. 95
    Alan Rusbringer says:

    Becos the Guardian man is like man the guardian home of like polly toynbee among others

  96. 96
    Vlad the Gay Impaler says:

    Cameron is condom head—- cause he’s a dick head and needs a rubber on him to stop the slime ouzing out over every one.
    The the other won is lover boy Hague

  97. 97
    Got No Mojo Working says:

    Presumably MI6 thought that the Mad Dog Gadaffi was going to join the Flying Burrito Brothers in the Gilded Palace of Sin.

  98. 98
    Westminster Gossip says:

    Plans are already in place to replace William Hague in his Richmondshire Constituency should he decide to stand down before the next election. Some months ago, Wendy Morton, who stood and failed to take the Tynemouth seat in last years General Election was told to re-establish links in the contingency where her husband runs a small electronics business. Morton, a former Richmondshire District Council, is working hard behind the scenes to build up her local profile in Hague’s back yard. If nothing else, we Tory’s plan for both the foreseen and unforeseen!

  99. 99

    Our local curry house delivers within 15 minutes. Mind you its probably Halal and more deadly than any Goddam awful festering dish that Jamie Oliver ever served up!!

  100. 100

    You mean the Daily Mail (circulation 3,000,000 ) as oppossed to the Gruaniad read by a few poofs at the BBC. Wonder which one offerred most money to Prezza?

  101. 101
    Curtains says:

    ‘if there aren’t any of them left’

    What’s going to happen to them in your fantasy world?

  102. 102
    A Doe Eyed SPAD says:

    Ive been working very HARD in Billys “backyard”

  103. 103
    Osama the Nazarene says:

    Homo – sodomite – pederast all = gay. Nothing homophobic there, move along please.

  104. 104
  105. 105
  106. 106
    SaltPetre says:

    Are you feeling a little queer ?

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