Ed Miliband told Piers Morgan that he was a bit of “a square” at university, hence why he never took drugs or slept with as many girls as Nick Clegg. While Guido didn’t have much trouble believing this, with a little help from his mortar-boarded co-conspirator he has been digging around that vessel of truth – the 1980s Oxford student press.

While yes there is a vast amount of extremely dull comment from one “Ted” Miliband, president of the Corpus Christi JCR about rent hikes and other pressing issues of the day (you can have a read of some his greatest moments here,) it was a mention of the Ted’s Labour club that really caught Guido’s attention:

(click for original)

In PMQs at the end of last year, Miliband declared he was proud of his student politician days while the PM was throwing bread rolls and trashing restaurants. The quip was widely seen as a good hit on Dave’s Bullingdon days, but it seems little “Ted” was prone to the odd bit of smashing stuff up too. Oh to be the ruling elite…

Their tension in the House has been noted previously. First it was those passionate gazes held for an extra second across the despatch box in hot and heavy Culture Media and Sport sessions, but it seems Gloria just can’t get enough of Ed Vaizey. While Ed was busy chatting up/to the somewhat hostile MumsNet crowd for their lunchtime web interview, his shadow just couldn’t stay away, wading in with her own questions:

Ed’s reply was short and firm.

Ed Miliband talks about Justine to Piers Morgan:

EM:“Justine would have killed me [if I hadn't taken paternity leave], and rightly.

PM “She’d have murdered you?”

EM: “Well, no.”

PM: “God, 30 seconds in and there’s your headline: ‘My Wife’s Going to Kill Me, says Miliband’.”

EM: “She’s not my wife.”

PM:“So you married a millionaire?”

EM:“I’m not married.”

PM: “So your wife owns the house?”

EM:“She’s not my wife.”

PM: “So your girlfriend owns the house?”

EM “My partner. Girlfriend sounds too temporary.”

Gordon Brown’s constituents in Kircaldy must be delighted to hear that their part time MP is making a cool £15,000 an hour on the international stage. It’s no wonder he was so quick to give the money from his dire book sales to charity, on top of what he is raking in from speaking he would have only lost most of it in tax anyway. The rest of the cash is apparently going straight to The Office of Gordon and Sarah Brown and thus his staff and operation. If he paid his staff out of his fees they would be paid out of 50% post-tax income, this way they are paid out of untaxed income – a handy little tax dodge.The GB/SB Office is not a charity though, unlike the similar structure Blair has set up.

Through his Sports foundation, a charity, Blair is able to avoid paying tax on income he receives. The charity comes into question when it is revealed that the charity isn’t really doing very much. They paid more in staff costs in the last quarter than they spent on charitable activity. A similar get up is going on with the Faith Foundation which employs old loyalists like Ruth Turner at £120,000 a pop. With Blair’s staff costs rumoured to be a £5m a year, that’s a heck of a lot of cash saved through the donations and “charity” staff.

UPDATE: Guido is trying to get hold of someone from UK Uncut who will no doubt be livid about such practices. Right?

Imitation is the highest form of flattery, so Guido was highly amused to see the Daily Mirror attempt to steal his Curse of Jonah meme and apply it to “Disaster Dave”. While the fact that Cameron saying good luck to the Scottish not British “star” Andy Murray, off-form Lewis Hamilton and the England World Cup team did coincide with losses, it’s odd the Mirror couldn’t work the England cricket team, who Cameron wrote to before they departed for down south, into their story.

Cameron may well yet bring down planes from the sky, floods, fire and a banking meltdown, but until then there will be only one Jonah…

Ed Miliband faces the cold shoulder from Justine after an interview with Piers Morgan of which a Sky Sports presenter would be proud. While it wasn’t quite up there with Clegg’s “no more than thirty” comment in the GQ rite-of-passage, Ed did manage to “Thank God” that he isn’t married while discussing which other women he would like to get stuck on a desert island. How sensitive…

Or perhaps there is a smarter game at foot. Guido isn’t convinced by this attempt at manly banter. With Valentines’ just two weeks away to the day, could this be a false flag to add to the element of surprise when the Labour leader goes down on one knee on the 14th? Given it is vital swinging female voters that Ed needs to get on side if he is going to lead his party to victory, the comments seem somewhat risky. Why would he want to put off such a vital bloc?