Rich & Mark’s Monday Morning View
Ed Miliband Woos Unhappy Lib Dems – The Sun
Andrew Lansley Has Been Shot | Dan Hodges
Another Gay Gaffe From Ken | Standard
Pensioners Paying Price for Funny Money | Telegraph
Ken Penis Gaffe | Metro
Hague Photo Mystery | Guardian
The Iranian Model is Hitler | Lawrence J. Haas
No.10′s Andrew Cooper Should Look at this Poll | Douglas Carswell
Livingstone Has Form on Homophobia | ConservativeHome
Investors HBack Over RBS Meddling | CityAM
Riddled With It | Pink News
I Went Mad in the Seventies | Ken
Guy Newsroom Splits | Indy
Polly’s Voodoo Polling | UK Polling Report
Labour SpAd Backs the Bill | Mark Wallace
Guido Goes for the Lobby | Press Gazette
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Max Clifford says…
“Most people want to read nasty things about people, not nice things.”
DisgustedOfMitcham2 says:
Maybe if they really wanted to “decontaminate the Labour brand” with business people, they shouldn’t have totally buggered up the economy?
Just a thought.
Fings will only get better.
Who is Fings, and from what is he suffering?
Here’s how to stay in government chaps:
“It may be worth considering whether anyone can apply political pressure to the Committee Members, through lobbying in advance?”
http://menmedia.co.uk/stockportexpress/news/s/1065170_rap_for_council_officers_over_planning_pressure
Ahh LOBBYING, I always wondered how it was done.
But that kind of thing could never happen in central government!
Isn’t that a Libe Dem council in Stockport?
Aha, I smell a rodent!
Why does the piccy portray Portaloo?
Ed Milband ?
gissa break: this is Ed
Yep anon at 12.37, would have got that. So simple vs the drivel above…
Dunno. But when it was “Things Can Only Get Better”, we had 13 years od NewLab!
He meant to write ‘finger’, you know, like the one he’s always got up your arse?
‘I smile where the sun don’t shine. . . . ‘
I am an MP, and I want a living wage of £100,000 AND not having to give receipts to the new fees office.
(All these policy ideas… where were Labour for the past 13 years?)
Punch,kick,headbutt,stamps on face
Stab, stab ,stab, slice, chop, chop……….burn.
Is this it Eddy? IS THIS HOW YOU FUCK A STRANGER IN THE ASS!
First time I’ve heard him speak. Hahaha… he speaks out of his nose. He sounds like a real dork!
Let’s hope he gets elected.
Who dat den ?
Ed Millipede dreaming.
I thought EM myself but its supposed to be that LibDem man, isn’t it? What’s his name again?
Steele? Thorpe? Cyril Smith? Paddy Pantsdown? Laws? Beaker? David Owen? Shirley Williams?
I’m running out of Lib Dems now, except Sarah Teather, and it’s definitely not her….
Come to think of it, it can’t be a Lib Dem anyway – it hasn’t got a beard.
Bill Rodgers, Woy Jenkins, Lord Melbourne, Lord John Russell, Lord Palmerston, Gladstone, Lloyd George (he knew my father), Jo Grimond, Eric Lubbock, Jeremy Thrope of the pink oboe (oh you mentioned him!), Charlie hic Kennedy …
Isn’t there another one that we’ve both forgotten? Vaguely recall one with a name like Clagg…Clank? Clark? No, not Clark…
Damn….I just can’t quite bring it to mind….
Willy Wonka?
Norman Scott’s dog. RIP
Got it! It’s the feller Ed Milipede is having dreams about sacking. (Won’t happen – they’re not even in the same party. Debatable whether they’re even on the same planet at the moment.)
Clegg. That’s the feller’s name. Don’t think it’s him in the cartoon, though. That Clegg feller never seems to wear a blue tie for some reason. Can’t think why not.
Lord Russell of Liverpool who wrote The Knights Of Bushido?
Required reading for anyone who argues that a mighty state is good for people who aren’t wielding the power.
terrible book
Eeeeeeeeeeeeee……….choochie face! Get down Schorbitz!
Its Ronnie Kray isn’t it?
Hallelujah! Someone else that thinks he looks like Bernie Winters. Vindicated at last!
D Milipede says: “Come to my party and bring some bottles, and that means no bricks Gordon.
No Charles, Drink Canada Dry is only a slogan.
Now sit down and tell me how wonderful I am.”
Miliband specimen D, hardly needs to lash out on the blue nun & nibbles, when he has the bbc providing free propoganda on his behalf – The Toady presenter in his best national disaster voice intones, apropo of nothing ‘ and david miliband is reported in G2 as being dismayed by what David Cameron is doing to the country’. What ? like not knifing his ministers in the back, starting the odd illegal war and trying not to spend more than we earn ?
This guy needs to learn to think in a straight line…
Not Charles K, then.
No, that’s walking in a straight line…..
Re the ASI article..
Obscene discrimination against Catholic Care because of their religious beliefs
What would happen is a Jewish agency applied the same principles ?
Sadly Britain is no longer a free country that respects religious freedom…
But a regresive, decadent backwater applying fascist principles…
If Mother Nature has decided that poofs can’t have children then why pick on th e catlicks for applying the same principle?
Because the Labour Party and their boxticking bedwetters know better, and have decreed that not only should poufs have kids, but that it’s a ‘ooman right, innit?
It’s not like the kids should be worried enough being given to Catholics – they now have to watch their arses too.
Very well put The P.
The Daily Mail will be full of ‘My parents sold my arse down at the gay bar…’ stories in 15 years time.
Is this Jim Garner with a
new hairdo ?
Ed Milliwatt no matter what he squeaks he is just another typical fag end chancer politician who would sell his children for a Libdem pact if he thought it would propel him into number 10.
Bigger mugs are those that support him but ain’t on a Nooolab bung!
Is that Prince William?
A mong with an imaginary job
No, I reckon it’s Sly Stallone round about the time of Rocky II.
Prince William? I prefer the term Drippy Willie and, of course his brother Dopey Harry.Sorry, half brother.
Monday morning smile (maybe)
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/7958469/Tim-Vine-wins-best-joke-at-Edinburgh-Fringe.html
If that’s the best gag, there’s no hope.
Thanks for the link. Some good ones there…
I was surprised to see this nominated for a worst in show joke, as I think it both clever and witty…
‘Sara Pascoe: ”Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.” ‘
This is a socialist country………….there is no other side
I think his brother, Jeremy, has the best joke: “I work for the BBC”
Poor old Ed….fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down!
And landed in the spaz bush.
And his brother told a black semi deaf genie that he wanted to be “important” someday
Did he say “important” or “impotent”? And did he mean politically?
His other two wishes were a Sky TV subscription and to play for Barcelona.
And I attained my ambition of getting 2 Boeteng suits for the price of one…
Labour waste 2/3 of day…
Theirs or ours?
The coalition at work http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=En4ase-1-FA&feature=fvw
This man was the “Chairman” of Gurning Gordon’s “Council of Economic Advisers” who pissed £ 2 trillion of our money up the wall (though much recuperated by their “friends”)
Says it all…
Labour’s “Hoon of the Year” contest has long since settled into the indescribable chasing after the inconsequential. It is noteworthy that Rich and Mark chose the least important happening of the week as a fit subject on which to release their febrile talents.
are Rich and Mark real or the products of Guidos mind?
both
I thought ‘febrile’ meant ‘feverish’. Did you mean ‘feeble’?
That is fighting talk from Labour the next session of Parliment will be an interesting one cant wait!!
Fighting what? The mess-clearing after their 13-year binge?
Once again I looked at the weekly cartoon, and was struck by the fact that I haven’t a clue who it is meant to be.
What was hilarious was the link re: Ed Milliband that I then noticed below!
Pay up
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/road-and-rail-transport/7959266/City-councils-wage-a-new-war-on-motorists.html
I’m still prime minister. Isn’t that right, mummy? Can I have my fizzy orange now?
No, you need to cut down on the tartrazine.
Today I will mostly be watching my Star Trek The Next Generation season 4 box set.
Is it that strange looking BBC reporter Gary Donahue (I think?), the one who looks like Sloth from the Gooneys!
HEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY YOU GUYSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
tat in his early years
Who the fuck is that?
Where’s Sarah Beard today? Why do we never see her with her hero anymore? Why is it every time he comes to London, she goes to Scotland and vice versa? Why doesn’t she admit the truth of their tawdry arrangement instead of continuing this charade? She played her part while he was in office. Time to stop the act so she can free herself up to live in Canterbury.
Their kids are on holiday, have to pretend everything’s ok for them. Soon as school starts, it’ll be “Daddy and Mummy are very busy and don’t have time to see each other so much…”
How mùany spin doctors and PR men do the RSPB have ?
10 , 25 ?
I need to know
Before they are fired
PS Why can’t paid highly paid executives paid by these quangos talk to the Press FFS ? Britain has gone PR mad…
And not only do all these quangos have their own in-house PR people
They pay outside consultants AS WELL…
Off with all their balls…
http://www.rspb.org.uk/media/
According to this RSPB site
There are 26 paid Media/PR staff
Without knowing how much they pay outside “consultants”
These quangos have gone mad…
PS They are advertising for at least 2 new Media jobs… in Beds…
It is a characteristic of all these goody goody charities that they exist largely for the benefit of their higher echelons of staff who get wages disproportionate to both their abilities and the requirement of the jobs.
RSPCA, RSPB, Age Concern/Help the Aged or whatever they are this week. Troughers shielding behind respectability gorging on peoples innate goodness and generosity, with all the integrity of a beggar on the scrounge with his motor parked just around the corner.
RSPB isn’t a quango. It relies entirely on private donations. They do no use public funds extorted from the taxpayer.
If you don’t like what they do, don’t pay. I was a member until I realised that they have been infiltrated by cagoul-wearing liberal greenies. They do not support a cull of the rampant magpie (not Newcastle supporters – we all support that) population, even though it would a benefit to songbirds, but because it would upset the sensibilities of its town based membership and so hit subscriptions. That is a polictical decision.
The same RSPB is banging on about CUTS, has a full page ad in The Eye on them.
http://campaigning.rspb.org.uk/ea-campaign/clientcampaign.do?ea.client.id=13&ea.campaign.id=7410
Is the RSPB on the Fake Charity list yet?
Correct, they long ago lost any credibility from an environmentalist point of view, when they turned Langholme Moor into a bird free wasteland, rather than offend the sensibilities of their delicate members by culling predators.
Strangely they never seem to mention the 500 million song birds and mammals estimated to be killed annually by all those cuddly cats owned by their mates at the rspca. However they are always ready with a rent a quote whenever a dead raptor is found – got to be a ‘Keeper’ hasn’t it ?
There are very few national charidees which haven’t been taken over by a leftist clique of nulab types, who now make a very nice living out of donations from the gullible public, whilst twisting what were sound founding principles to meet their own social-political aims.
And sold themselves for a fistful of feathers to renewable energy companies…
I can’t help thinking that Ed Miliband is potentially Labour’s next Gordon Brown. He’s the kind of guy that can do well within the safety of the Party but would be an easy target for the Tories and would simply not be much good. That is why he was made Minister for the Environment or whatever. If Labour don’t pick David Miliband they are nuts.
They are nuts if they do, Sir WW…
But not a great choice…
I am a firm supporter of Jim Garner
Nice fresh schoolboy face
Like my friend Tone when he was young…
Dear Marje
My work colleagues are shunning me and although I can’t quite put my finger on it I think I’m being left out of something. They keep taking furtive phone calls from someone called “Ed” inviting them to some party or other and when I tackled my friend Charlie about it he said that I was just being silly !
Even my “newest” best friend at work “Dave” is ignoring my calls.
Any advice would be welcome
P.S.
Up until to a few months ago I was the most popular guy around…. now it’s as if I’m a “bad smell” and friends just mutter in embarassment when I tackle them about it.
Have some sympathy for me. I had to go on TV and pretend to be emotional about a child my beard had. She got the anonyspunk at a jizzbank in London.
Wheres the guy who usually gives the hook nosed n a z i s a blast from both barrels
Does Guido have a contract he cannot get out of for the supply of these mediocre cartoons? Someone please take their felt tips away.
They go sploot sploot up my bot bot! I wuv you, Gordon!
You feeble minded dick head.
Can you guess what it is yet?!
Yup,as our Aussie friends say ‘ you’d have been better off keeping the afterbirth.’
Doesn’t Guido have a juicy scandal about Labour or Brown he can give us? It’s been too long. We need something entertaining. A photo of McDoom entering a hospital psychiatric ward or an audio of Blinky calling a voter every name under the sun. I’d like Labour destroyed once and for all.
Who do you think he is, Bruce Willis?
Scrap that, Willis is way too fit for the analogy to work.
Quite agree..
Or a photo of one of the Millies streaking down Whitehall supported by Whelan and McBride (to get maximum news coverage)
Shock breaking news
Charles Kennedy to join the Scottish National Party…
Free supply of Scottish wine provided…
Not surprising
The SNP never could walk straight…
Charlie has since reconsidered, as he thought the was joining the SNP for ‘a fast buck’ and was disappointed only to find buckfast.
My wife never understood me. I’m a complex man with many needs, intellectually and… oh, look, Asda are doing a great deal on White Lightning. That’s me sorted for the day.
She never understood me either.
Nor me.
Mr Kennedy, Mr Johnnie Walker will see you now.
The Bells! The Bells!
APPLAUSE
Get to da choppa!
Doncaster Climate Change Petition
We, the undersigned, believe climate change is real and man-made, as demonstrated by the science, and we must take action as citizens of Doncaster to tackle climate change. Doing so is necessary for the environment and future generations, and can be good for our economy and society.
http://www.edmiliband.org.uk/cc-petition
–
He still has this shit on his site! loll!
Like the comment – but to get the full poetry suggest the last loin reeds
He still has shitE on his site.
And to think, – there be the future leader of GB (when Gordo finally vapourises in a flash of global warning)
He’s capitalising on the floods in Doncaster a few years ago. Centuries ago, people would have claimed that such floods were a punishment from on high for the wickedness and luxury of the inhabitants. Nowsadays we are more enlightened, so we claim that such floods are a punishment from on high for the wickedness and luxury of the inhabitants. There is deep-seated human itch that has to be scratched.
“He who builds house on flood plain must expect lake in living room !”
Especially a flood plain that is sinking because of mining subsidence…
The EA have been spending lots of money to sort out the flood defences, but they can’t change the height of the land. Without the drainage pumps, the whole place would turn into a swamp within a week.
It will happen again, whatever they do.
The whole point of Toll Bar has been lost anyway – the mine is long closed.
Perhaps he might like to talk to the planning authorities in his constituency instead:
“The development of the LDF will outline the broad areas of future change and growth. It is envisaged that this will need to include development within communities affected by floods (such as Bentley and Thorne) to enable regeneration and growth. It is therefore recommended that the intended consultation on the Doncaster Core Strategy is highlighted to the EA, and they are asked to consider how they will be able to facilitate the safe regeneration and development of Doncaster’s communities which are affected by flood risk.”
They are going to build on the floodplain, because development = jobs (yeah, right), then task the Environment Agency with saving them from disaster, then blame the EA when the inevitable happens.
Idiots.
“Doing so is necessary for the environment and future generations, and can be good for our economy and society.”
But not for seals…
Wind farm link to butchered seals
Experts think animals washed up in Norfolk were hit by propellers of boats used in a green energy project
Sorry it’s behind a pay wall, but the gist is: duct propellers on tugs and other craft used for the construction and maintenance of off-shore wind farms have killed and mutilated 38 seals (horribly) this year in one location alone.
And I forgot to add the National Trust have to send out teams early every morning to remove their carcasses from the beaches “so holiday makers and their children won’t be upset”.
EVERY organization is conspiring to cover up the truth! Hypocrites!
Dead seals and dead birds are a small price to pay for the whopping 0.8% contribution to the UK’s electricity wind turbines make (when the wind’s blowing of course, and then only if it’s not too strong).
I hope you’re being ironic — it’s actually not even that, last winter it was 0.2% — coldest winter for 13 years and the reason for that is when it’s cold, there’s usually high pressure causing it in winter.
They also forget to mention that you need the same fossil backup (running on hot standby inefficiently) for every turbine and 3 times the grid infrastructure to cope with peak output and troughs.
Doncaster/Primrose Hill
Just Which one does Ed prefer ?
Ed Who?
I’ve seen that John Prescott around here though. What could he see in the place, I wonder?
Either – he’ll happily go cottaging in both
Just imagine – if we had another 998 Milibands we would have one complete band.
If a Milli is a thousandth, why is a million one thousand thousand?
Hmmm. And a million should be a killion killion.
And what would we call this band? The Levellers?
The Brothers of Intervention?
The Average White Milliband?
The Who?
Dire Straits?
He is the hair to Brown
OK I give up. Who is it?
I’ve narrowed it down to several possibilities including
Nick Clegg
David Cameron
A Miliband bros
and Andy Burnham
Of your charity, please pray for me.
Deliver us from press passes (for Toenails and Toilets)
And give us our Daily Telegraph, as we forgive the Times for its pay wall against us…
Is it that Jonathan Charles bloke wot reads the Pravda?
O/T
If Rich and Mark are reading, How much did you chaps get for your ‘Dave’s milky tits’ original piece?
The whole world and especially this Blog Site is degrading into mediocrity!
Sez embittered the NuLabour hoon. Get over it, you lost.
Funny how councils like Bristol, York, Devon, Hampshire, Leeds, Bournemouth, South Somerset and Wiltshire are queing up to impose more parking taxes on private parking places.
There was nothing from the Huhnes who stood as Limp Dim candidates for BCC local elections. Don’t frighten the votes with cars, lets save the plant, lets make it even harder to encourage firms to relocate to this city.
Lets hire some counsultants to recommend guided bus lanes in specially built concrete roads. Lets waste more taxpayers money to go to Copenhagen climate change conference. Turn the city into a fairtrade hell hole.
The words are quite funny but the man in the picture is not recognisable as Ed Miliband.
Good one, today!
people are stupid