Saturday Seven Up
Pretty good week for the blog, Monday’s CCHQ floor-plan was an object of fascination to thousands of readers and revealed that Ashcroft was out of Tory HQ. To the Tory staffer who claimed that it was out of date, Guido has to tell him that it is more likely to be his version that is out of date. Guido was first to report that Transport Minister Sadiq Khan had been caught lying and ordered to repay thousands. Thanks to EyeSpy.MP we were first to reveal (Sarah’s Discreet Tête à Tête Tweeted) that the dodgy non-dom Lord Paul was having lunch with Sarah Brown – before she had even finished her dessert. The Race to Be Dave’s Downing Street Mouthpiece was the post that resulted in the most, errrm, ‘feedback’ from the Westminster politico-media village.
The email that tickled Guido the most was the one from a Jehovah’s Witness complaining that Guido had compared the LibDem theme tune to “a Jehovah Witness recruitment ad“. They attached an MP3 of their choir and Guido confesses that it was in comparison Ad Majorem Dei Gloriam.
If you were not one of the 57,785 visitors viewing 384,508 pages over the last seven days, here are the seven most popular stories (in order of popularity) that you missed:
- Cash Carrying Charlie Whelans Pop into Downing Street
- On and On and On
- Yes Wee Can
- Beware the Whelan in Sheep’s Clothing
- Lib Dem Choir Clanger
- Liam Gets His Fingers Byrnt
- EXCLUSIVE : Sadiq Khan Caught Lying to Lyon
Tells Standards Commissioner He Can’t Remember ‘Mistaken’ Claim
You’re either in front of Guido, or you are behind…
Great stuff Guido…
Keep it up…
Let’s see Whelan strung up in Parliament Square before he can go back to his salmon fishing in Scotland paid for by Unite workers who have or will lose their jobs because of him and Smearing ZanuLabour…
It makes I very angry when a Union assumes that they are running the business that their members work for.
And it makes I just as angry when local militant shop stewards intimidate their members who do not want to strike.
Thank you David Cameron
HEADLINES
David Cameron Encourages bloggers on Order Order blog site to vote for Labour and 5 more years of Gordon Brown.
Now that’s what I like to hear,David
Amid tens of thousands of distraught and wounded air travellers the Riot Police had finally kettled the baying mobs of petrol bomb throwing trolley dollies and screaming militant cabin crew flying pickets who transformed the airport into a blood soaked battleground.
Shocked onlookers looked on in horror as several Jets were taxid into a group of mounted riot Police horses squashing the poor beasts and traumatising the hundreds of thousands of air travellers unfortunate enough to get caught up in the anarchy.
Comrade Wooley led the baying strikers by bellowing from a Russian MIG fighter jet he had commandereed from his soviet paymasters as he buzzed Heathrow dropping small statues of Stalin onto the heads of startled Police and the millions of air travellers whose lives he had ruined forever.
The Saintly Mr Walsh sobbed openely as he comforted small children and kittens who he had personally saved from being beaten to death by bullyboy trolley dollies.
The unparallelled scenes of death and destruction are expected to worsen and continue every day for the next 6 weeks said B.A. management source Mr Dandy Boulson.
Proof the copy, front page it and get me a human interest for a sidebar with a distraught big titted milf and her family. Full photospread.
We’re gonna splash big on this shit like an incontinent tramp.
In your dreams dickhead!
Whelan is doing a better job to turn people to the Tory partry than anyone else. The rail union is likely to follow this course soon and people will realise what the true Liebour is about. The unions like their party don’t have the mandate to behave as they do. members should stop paying their subscriptions. It also shows how Liebour are all lies and spin and have not changed from the aim to build a soviet surpressed state while lining their pockets like the revolting Blair- he should be brought to book, have his assets seized and prosecuted for war crimes.
Perhaps BBC’s Robinson will harp on about Ashcroft for the eighth time this week!!!
UNITEmare and other unions will be running this country if Gordoom is elected
Lord Ashcroft is a freedom loving patriot of this country who has donated millions to the cause of preventing a socialist, soviet style government in perpetuity, and therefore must be destroyed.
Totally agree, well said.
Pleeeeese save NuLabour
It’s being destroyed before our eyes by all these nasty unions…
And the country is bust
And I still have a mortgage on my mansion (until Tone)
My years of spinning and smearing are all for nought…
A paupers life awaits Lady Mandlescum, a mere £77,000 a year EU pension, plus trifling expenses and allowances of say £100,000 p.a. not forgetting the massive kick backs, from all those favours given, tough life huh?
Unions certainly have their place in sorting local difficulties, but when they become militant as the BA team have become at the moment, then public support is lost.
Brown must be shitting himself though, which can only be a good thing
New Tory poster released this morning on the subject, Nokias in the Bunker doing their pre-flight checks again…
http://conservativehome.blogs.com/thetorydiary/2010/03/david-cameron-to-invoke-the-spirit-of-thatcher-in-challenging-the-vested-interests-in-the-unions-and.html
Nurse nurse
I’m going down….and I think I’m out of it…
Please give me some of that lovely medicine..
Ally Campbell says it works wonders when he breaks down crying….
cretin.
Rotten to the core — have been for years:
http://www.channel4.com/programmes/a-very-social-secretary/4od#2921958
46:36 onwards… very funny.
Nurse Nurse
Please go down….and take me out of it..
Please give me some of that lovely medicine..
Ally Camp bell says it works wonders when given by Nurse Mengels son when he breaks down crying..
Cameron: I will be as tough as Thatcher
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/cameron-i-will-be-as-tough-as-thatcher-1924336.html
LOL
LOL
LOL
David Cameron = We want a tax on the banks
New Labour = We want a worldwide tax on the banks
Spot the difference!?!
I see Jockette trougher Anne Moffat has been deselected. Good riddance.
They are going down like ninepins…
NuLabour destroyed..Campbell, Mandy and Milli-Mossad kicked out of Downing Street…
Whelan doing a great job
To be replaced by UNITE and hooliganism of the 70s …Grundig, steel, car and enngineering industries destroyed etc
BTW
PollyTwaddle was in “secondary picketing” during the Grundig strike in the 70s…which was led by Droney, husband of Mad Harriet Hairpin who was brought up on the playing Fields of St Pauls School – Like Gideon ! arw arf…
Couldn’t make it up…
It’s looking more and more like 2010-2015 could end up rather like 1980-1985, with an incoming Conservative government desparately trying to reform the public sector having to face up to hostile Trades Unionism ingrained in the party Opposite…
Yes but
With the difference that the Unions no longer have a stronglehold on the economy like they used to have…
The big battalions have been mostly broken up
And even the two General Secretaries of Unite dont’ speak to eachother…
And Labour is going to split in two…
The Nulabout frauds who have bust the country…
And the Old Labour hoodies who will kill Mandy and his likes for us…
They will implode as they often do…
You must be new here Jack. Didn’t any one tell you, only wankers double space.
Fuck
Off
TaT.
Thanks for illustrating my point.
Good work wanker.
Steve, we have prepared and packaged the 50 kilograms of Heroin you ordered. Could you please tell us when you are coming to collect?
Get a life you sad fucker.
Steve, is that you? Are you talking in code?
Get a life? But Heroin destroys lives Steve, that is why you are making so much money out of it.
Sad fucker? The sad fuckers are the junkies who take the Heroin you hook them up to Steve.
Please, do not insult me, all I want is to know when you are coming to collect the Heroin you ordered, it is ready for distribution.
I’d love to chat wank with you, but in about half an hour i shall be taking the missus and kids to a restaurant.
I’m sure you can find some crumbs for your lunch.
And your punctuation is shocking.
Peasant.
You got beat mate now fuck off.
Taxi will be here in 20 mins, until then, you will have to put up with me calling you a c*nt.
C*nt.
no tat, I post with with own name, rather then making up a new one every time like the trolls do.
Spoken like a true loser.
Bye loser.
Ah, there you are Steve!
I was having a slight communication problem and I was just about to arrange the shipment of your 50 kilos of Heroin to the wrong guy.
Shit happens!
Now please Steve, stop fucking about and tell me when you are coming to collect the smack. There will an extra storage charge if you delay collection.
I still have 10 minutes of abuse left. What’s the matter?
Is it because your style of argument is akin to a nine year old, boasting about how hard his dad is?
You lose, fuck face………..Mmmmm.
Lovely.
You ronery, anon, you got no fliends.
Hahahahahahaha.
Listen, Tat, or whoever you are today, the reason you never got a job doing what you do for money is that you’re a twat with little knowledge of libel law: that’s what you do when you make false criminal accusations against people using written words as your medium. Slander is something you obviously don’t have the bottle for. It’s all drugs with you – got issues, lowlife?
Betcha ain’t so gobby away from your keyboard, eh shitzboy?
Now go suck a haliperodol and go back to bed. No one’s going to miss you on a Saturday.
You cry yourself to sleep because you are so lonely.
Who gives a fuck?
This isn’t the samaritans.com you c’unt.
Jesus.
I’m off to the restaurant.
Toodle fucking pip.
Bye loser.
SAC, I don’t take drugs mate.
But judging by the appalling syntax of your post you must be very fucking high indeed this morning.
11.42am, bit early innit?
shit does that mean I have to get married again?
Moffat deselected perhaps there is a god after all. Looks as though Union backing did not help her on this occasion. I know she used to head up Unison but is there a unite connection? I am sure we will get to hear more and will it come under a female shortlist? No doubt Harriett will parachute in one of hubby’s friends.
Moffet only got in last GE with less than 40 vote majority, thats why she’s leaving the sinking labour ship. Also the people of Crawley can’t stand the useless f****wit. Not a safe labour seat anymore as the people of sussex see the light!!!
BROONS CRAP!
So they will not Be Picking Moffat brother?
….To be replaced by NUniteLabour and hooliganism….
here are pics – as promised – from 10 Downing Street’s celebration of women reception http://bit.ly/bi1JY5
Am I not a truly inspirational speaker ???
Why was Gordon (the only man) there anyway? And why were all the ‘inspirational’ women celebrities? And why is the taxpayer having to pay for this claptrap?
I feel more comfortable with women.
So would I if I were a bully there’s less chance of being hit back.
Another bunch of social climbing troughers…
All paid for by US !
I hate Annie Lennox almost as much as I hate Marcus Brigstocke.
Odd how none of the MSM have picked up on the Sarah Brown/Swaraj Paul tete a tete; why?
And here was me thinking she was the pin up girl of the Labour election campaign. Apparently not, when seen with Lord Pawl.
Because they are pigs in the same trough
Did the MSM ever say a word about the criminal smearing of McBride and his merry men…???
Until Guido broke the story…
someone told Sarah
the only way she would get some “Brown Cock “was to go and see
Lord Paul
Stop advising me not to marry my sisters and cousins. I’ll marry who the fuck I like.
Lord Ashcroft.
Lord”indian child labour “paul.Och the new
UNITE !! Lord Paul !!
Lord Pension-pinching Paul
LORD ASHCROFT
Yet, as Mr David Cameron reminds us often, social responsibility is not only and always the duty of the state.
So, as a small and symbolic mark of disrespect, this blog will henceforth refer to the non-dom billionaire as Not-Lord Ashcroft.
May we commend the practice to the blogosphere
Pompous ass
How dare you take my name in vain
I am the only DOLLY
Smearer in chief of everything that is blue…
Thick as thieves doesn’t use capital letters therefore the poster you refer to is an imposter.
Cor, you’re a bloody ignorant c’unt aren’t you.
You know nuffink.
Yeah, ’cause the Stelazine he takes affects control of his stumpy little fingers – he can’t hit the shift key on his special keyboard without having another breakdown..
Oh, so that is what you are prescribed.
Explains a lot.
No. I just study unfortunate people like you.
Good week! Things will only get better…
Memo to all campaign managers: the polls are turning to shit again tell those lazy fucking trolls to get put their fingers out and start blitzing order-order.com. With all this Ashcroft and Hague stuff going on we are losing control of the narrative.
Memo to Hilton and Coulson: we are paying you c’unts a fucking fortune and you are just not coming up with the goods. Get soem decent lines of attack going and get those lazy fucking trolls working harder pumping out more Tory propaganda FFS. We are losing the battle and if we don’t raise our game considerably we are going to end up losing this election badly.
That fucker thick as thieves was right, it definitely will be a hung parliament if you wankers don’t get your fucking act together.
Here’s a headline for you “Labour’s election campaign strategy grounded by UNITE”
or if you prefer ” Brown’s hopes to win election hits the buffers ”
Either of the above two disputes are particularly toxic for UNITE/LABOUR and will resonate with the electorate as their Easter hols are ruined by union action for which they will blame Brown and Labour whereas nobody outside the BBC and Westminster gives a toss about Ashcroft or Hague…..!!!!!!
Let us compare the two:
1) Lord Ashcroft the liar has evaded paying 125 million pounds and counting of tax contributions, and the alread overburdened taxpayer will have to make up that amount Ashcroft has evaded contributing.
2) A few thousand people who use British Airways will have to use another airline to go on a holiday that most other people in the country couldn’t afford.
No contest, is it.
The public will decide which is worse, a tax evading lord or workers protecting their wages during a recession.
Jesus wept, you tory trolls really are dumb motherfuckers.
Do you even believe your own spin FFS?
Your tory propaganda is weak and pathetic, please try harder.
I just hope you aren’t being paid to post such rubbish comments because if you are CCHQ are just burning their money.
Tats getting desperate now that his hung parliament wet dream hangs in tatters.
If you keep repeating your bullshit maybe you will start believing it reedy.
Tats getting desperate now that his hung parliament wet dream hangs in tatters..
You will have to repeat it more than once to believe it reedy.
Consider it your mantra, repeat it all day long and maybe your bullshit will become true.
In your own mind anyway.
Tat’s getting desperate now that his hung parliament wet dream hangs in tatters.
Keep going reedy, keep dancing.
Good bitch.
Tat’s getting desperate now that his hung parliament wet dream hangs in tatters..
Almost there reedy, keep going.
Tat is just desperate.
1. Ashcroft has not “Evaded” tax, he has “Avoided” tax only on overseas income – something that everyone right-minded person would do – do you want to pay too much tax??
2. BA employ, directly and indirectly, over 100,000 people in West London. Many of them are on minimum wage such as baggage handlers, caterers and other airport workers. BA’s reputation is close to collapse due to the excessive militancy shown by the Cabin Crew union, where the Pilots and Engineers have both agreed pay cuts. The CC are not been asked to take a pay cut.
The public outside Westminister don’t give a shit about party funding, they think they are all the same.
They don’t have much feeling for strikers when they themselves have experienced redundancy and/or reduced hours and conditions in the recession…
That’s a bit rich coming from a Heroin dealer like you, Steve.
You don’t pay tax on your Heroin sales and Ashcroft evades paying full tax as well.
You have common interests with the tax evader Ashcroft.
People people call it tax avoision
Don’t worry chaps, this just came in. “Tories quadruple their lead from 2% to 8%.”
http://politicalbetting.com/index.php/page/2/
that poll indicates tory support falling from the last Harris poll, would still result in a hung Parliament and your delighted?!?!
says it all
clutching at straws
That’s only if you use the crude measure of Universal National Swing. You don’t know much about polls do you?
Of course it good for us…
We want a Hung Parliament
Our Little boy Cleggie will be the Kingmaker
The Pound will collapse and the gilts markets
We will havve a double dip
The unions will bring the country to a halt
But it all good for Cleggie and his porn producers you know…
Peter Mangled Bum loves a bit of “7 up”
I can recommend it.
I need a dwarf who needs tossing
I must say I’m a bit pissed off about all the looming travel chaos.
I was going to go to Bristol with my boyfriend as he promised to take me up the Cheddar Gorge.
Ah, well, on with the show: Lord Ashcroft, Lord Ashcroft, blah fucking blah.
Best story of the week was
When the little pakistani boy was returned home
Gordon Mc bust just happened to be in Oldham Gurning at the populus
what a fucking coincedence !
and the little reported attempt
to get Gordon (football expert and fitness fanatic )
Brown on Match of the Day 2
which to their credit the BBC refused as it would be seen as politically bias so close to an election !
They’re all gurners up there… 3% of births, but 30% of congenital defects.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/health/article7069255.ece
Ah that would explain Milibanana then!
Shouldn’t he have done the Ireland Scotalnd RUGBY match as he has some background in this sport?
The BBC today failed to report that the Talibrown’s spiritual leader, Omar Bin Bag Mandleson, has today announced that Abu Ballsup and his fragrant child wife Princess Fidella Talkcrapper will rise up in woolly jihad and geehadn’t to overthrow the mercenary hordes of worker BA’s refusing orders to ride in labour’s Snatch votes vehicles’ providing such weak arguments they fear for the lives. Big Ed Ballsup comments include lots of words in a random order which BBC spinners are currently desperately seeking to untangle while Nick Robinson takes his methodrone and swallows another helping of Number 10’s half baked pie in sky to regurgitate to the few remaining viewers who haven’t already given up in disgust and switched over to Sky. Dave Cameron is reported to be preparing the holiday water boarding island McTanamo somewhere in the English Channel to provide medical aid to these delusionists soon after May 6th.
breaking news ….violence breaks out at BA picket line, 70 trolly dollys smash police lines, mascara and lippy flying all directions……..this is ugly stuff
Funny.
And Mandy nicked my blue suede shoes…
Waaaaaaaaaaa
BA cabin crew, trolley dolleys?
Fook off they’re all fooking old battle axes wiv fookin saggy tits and fookin ugly glum faces, and the ‘men’ are all fookin mincin southern poofters
When aw fookin travels aw wants the fookin young tarts on Virgins waiting on me and me needs, its them tarts what should be on the living wages not the fookin BA
hags
Up the fookin workers!!!!!!!!
Sky reporting that at the Cabin Crew union meeting at Sandown yesterday, a number of BMWs, Range Rovers and Porches were seen in the car park.
Just saying…
Ah, now I see why you are so pissed off about this BA strike!
You use BA cabin crew as couriers for your Heroin shipments.
I see!
But look on the bright side Steve, as long as the strike goes on the British mainland will be free of your poisonous Heroin imports.
Please note the Porsches,Range Rovers and BMW’s probably belong to the poorly paid, overworked but courageous and patriotic Union organisers and not the staff.
Mine’s the clapped out ford rust bucket currently being stickered “Police aware”.
Save my Gucci shoes………
Memo to Andy Coulson and Steve Hilton: right, that’s it you useless wankers.
You have failed to do the job you have been overpaid to do, you two arseholes just don’t cut the mustard, you are both sacked. With immediate effect.
We have decided to hire thick as thieves to handle our PR from now on.
Your passes to CCHQ have been cancelled and your personal effects will be sent on.
Oh do shut up you old slapper.
Request denied.
You silly tart.
Request denied? Who do you think you are, the fucking queen?
Silly question.
You should be back at home with the Gay Chief Whip…
I.P. address full thread post delete on standby
IP delete request over-ruled.
“You should be back at home with the Gay Chief Whip…”
Tat has got so many names these days…….. in other words, a fucking shizoid.
Said ‘tat’s gay hamster’.
Fucking hell, you just couldn’t make this shit up!
As far as making shit up is concerned, I’d shut the fuck up if I were you.
Request denied.
And what the fuck is a shizoid anyway you idiot?
So who is this I’m replying to, Anon 1 or Anon 2?
That’s a bloody good question.
To be replaced by…..
Order Order and the Co-Conspirators..
We will kill off this Labour scum…
Yea
Give us half their money
and we will have Charlie Whelan running down Whitehall in his knickers…
o/t
Guido
I keep getting the fake Virus window coming up when I load your page.Your page is replaced by a warning saying my computer is at risk and then proceeds to scan my hard drive .I always cancel it and then run my anti virus software but nothing is ever found.
I know other people have mentioned this but its occured twice this morning.
Any ideas who has been fiddling around with your site?
So the Armed Forces have had their votes taken away by this corrupt government.
118,000 Forces personnel unable to vote…….
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/article-1259368/Is-sinister-Labour-plot-stop-British-troops-voting-election.html
I see a PMQ coming. How much lower can this sad excuse for a government sink.
Someone said on here some time ago that there is much to come out that would make current revelations pale into insignificance. I suppose we will have to wait for the GE campaign to kick off before these are revealed by whistleblowers wanting these hoons out. Personally it can’t come a moment too soon for me.
There was a direct question asked at PMQ three weeks ago. Brown answered with an assurance that Straw was on the case and that “….it was important that all serving military personnel would have the right to vote….” This needs to be followed up.
Load of old cobblers because the same thing happened in 2005 Election.Thousands of troops were dis-enfranchised
http://www.parliament.uk/commons/lib/research/briefings/snpc-04276.pdf
As they hate my guts, there is no way I am giving them a vote. I am not stupid.
And just to add, I have made arrangements for all BA cabin crew (Unite members only) to cast their vote where ever they are in the world.
that’ll be the Job Centre then.
I’m off to Edinburgh Uni in September. They say my three grade E GCSEs are just what they’re looking for.
Saw that
Fooking jocks discrimating against the others…
SCOTTISH LABOUR = ORGANISED CRIME
Students from Scotland and EU of course do NOT have to pay fees if they study in Scotland and get assistance to reduce their fees if they study elsewhere in the UK whereas English students have to pay the full £3,250 pa .How ironic the Student Loans Company is based in Glasgow
“Eligible Scottish domiciled and EU students studying in Scotland are entitled to free tuition. We will pay tuition fees straight to your institution.”
http://www.saas.gov.uk/faqs_fees.htm
If you’re an immigrant, avoid scotland like the plague. You end up being stabbed, or jumping out of high rise buildings.
What are they in?
Woodwork
Sewing
Media Studies
You English fuckwit. You spell it Meeja Studies. Get some English lessons.
A few years ago when one of my sons was applying to Uni the demand for “Meeja Degrees” was so high that the offers were AAB at A level or 340 UCAS points . This was the “Degree of choice” in the early “Noughties” with promise of all those high paid jobs in the media/journalism which very few actually achieved. In fact his school was pushing as many as they could into this area of “expertise”
Thankfully I talked him out of applying and he did a Law/Economics joint degree followed by a MBA which stood him in better stead than his friends who spent 3 years basically running around dressed as “giant caterpillars” and filming rubbish bins from different angles
Should that be mejia/dournalism?
I’ve only got 2, but Swansea Uni said they’d have me.
Twowot? Trolleybobs?
“You’re either in front of Guido, or you are behind…”
What does that even mean?!
In the world of baffling marketing tags, it’s almost on a par with the John Lewis classic, “Never knowingly undersold” (which used to make me think, whenever I saw it on one of their artics “you mean sometimes you undersell(??) stuff by accident? Get a grip”)
Like the John Lewis nonsense, your tag sounds big, but when exposed to a bit of critical scrutiny, it turns out to be outstandingly meaningless.
Humph. Maybe that’s point.
It isn’t very hard, it works on two levels, see if you can figure ‘em out.
Can’t. I’m very thick, see. Sorry.