Rich & Mark’s Monday Morning View
Andrew Lansley Has Been Shot | Dan Hodges
Another Gay Gaffe From Ken | Standard
Pensioners Paying Price for Funny Money | Telegraph
Ken Penis Gaffe | Metro
Hague Photo Mystery | Guardian
The Iranian Model is Hitler | Lawrence J. Haas
No.10′s Andrew Cooper Should Look at this Poll | Douglas Carswell
Livingstone Has Form on Homophobia | ConservativeHome
Investors HBack Over RBS Meddling | CityAM
Riddled With It | Pink News
I Went Mad in the Seventies | Ken
Guy Newsroom Splits | Indy
Polly’s Voodoo Polling | UK Polling Report
Labour SpAd Backs the Bill | Mark Wallace
Guido Goes for the Lobby | Press Gazette
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Max Clifford says…
“Most people want to read nasty things about people, not nice things.”
DisgustedOfMitcham2 says:
Maybe if they really wanted to “decontaminate the Labour brand” with business people, they shouldn’t have totally buggered up the economy?
Just a thought.
Comparing Brown to a dog about to be put down is an insult to dogs.
…and these so-called cartoons are an insult to my intelligence.
Agreed!
Agreed x 2
Note the stances and caption.
Never knew Viagra was green.
What a daft Cartoon. Wet Liberal Dave hasn’t got the balls to put a dying dog out of its misery.
Ed Balls on the telly earlier has really frightened me. I never realised that I could think such dark and violent thoughts.
Ed Bollox is more deluded and dangerous than Brown. He doesn’t need to be drugged to the eyeballs to be malevolent.
Ed Balls in his student days in Nazi uniform is just about the measure of the man. I’ve got a copy of it on my hard drive but don’t know how to upload it into my comment. P’raps another conspiritor with more technical knowledge has a copy too?
You mean this ?
Makes him look a bit like a young Hermann Göring.
That’s the one! Thank you Owl Hoot.
I was just going to comment that I hoped the injection was a lethal one. After all, we put down mad dogs – we don’t make them PM. But yes, the comparison is an insult to dogs.
For God’s Sake have we got to put up with “Brown the Clown “until May?? The man is totally delusional.His performance on Marr was total “Alice in Wonderland”.Does he not realise that the majority of the British public think’s he’s living in a parallel dimension where the UK economy is strong;he is a World Statesman whose every word is listened to with admiration by the rest of the World ? Judging by his performance obviously not as he continues to throw billions of our money(which we haven’t got and if Labour actually win the election we will be unable to fund in the Gilts Market)and thinks that he can call conference after conference to solve all the World’s ills from Climate change to Terrorism whilst other world leaders just shake their heads in disbelief.The Man is now more than a joke he is a liability to Britain’s credability abroad and the longer he remains the more damaged that credability becomes along with our creditworthiness as a country!!
Brown is like the Black Knight from Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
The bunkerman is totally in denial about the terrible reality of his situation. He has failed to realise that his policy of spending vast sums of money we don’t have has led to an unprecedented deficit that will take years to deal with and is slowing down the chance of a meaningful economic recovery. His lack of leadership has turned Britain into an international joke. But he sincerely believes that he is a great statesman who is doing everything right and will win the election. His lack of grasp of reality is both comic and tragic.
You can imagine Brown telling his cabinet. “It is but a scratch.”
Not at all. The first meaningful blow that gets landed and Brown will be off whining with his tail between his legs. He’s not a ‘fighter’. He’s a bully. A psychological bully. He reduces those around him to tears of frustration because they cannot penetrate his aura of idiocy and because ultimately, as things stand, he does have the authority to fuck up their careers and their lives.
It is a reign of terror in the true sense of the phgrase. Those around him, being spineless, unprincipled, self-serving bastards of the first order are prepared to put up with any idiocy and any degredation as long as they get another four or five months pay, expenses and pension contributions. Fuck the UK. Fuck the voters. Fuck y’all. It’s all about me baby.
The entire Labour machine is as culpable as the Maximum Imbecile. Because they were the only ones who could legally get rid of him and instead they b ravely chose to do fuck all, make the situation worse with each passing day and deliver us an economic and social clusterfuck that will be at least as bad as the 1980′s.
Just so the few of ‘em left could get dewy-eyed on public service strike marches whailing about the terrible Tory cuts. And how it’s all somebody elses fault.
C u n t s.
On the upside – Kallis out second ball of the day.
South Africa all out for 291. Four wickets in 25 minutes this morning.
Of course under Gordon Brown’s logic Andrew Strauss would never be allowed to be England Cricket captain because his skills were honed on the playing fields of posh Radley College.
Balls again on GMTV being fed lines by that very impartial interviewer Kate Garropway (Draper)
This was an insuly to our intelligence but very few people watching GMTV realise the link between Garroway, Draper and Balls. The interview ended with Garroway feeding a line allowing Balls to state do you want education or IHT for your families. A complete setup from the start and a total con but people WILL be swayed by this.
Don’t dismiss GMTV as inconsequential this was a good interview for Balls as he was bowled underarms all the way and allowed to get in lots of lies without a single challenge and lots of impressionable people do watch that in the morning. Combined with Pravda there is a subliminal message being sent out all the time which if you attempted when advertising you would be stopped.
Listened to “Toenails” dong his bit for talking up a “Hung Parliament” on Radio 4 Today programme – saying that it’s not yet clear who will win the election and that Brown could still win although he does apparently keep saying things are ok(rather than they’re really not) under Balls guidance to the annoyance of Mandelson and Darling. “Toenails” little “bon mot” was whilst the cats are away the mice will play” but that it does seem Balls will be making the running on the thrust of Labour’s Election Campaign – so except more delusional stuff from Gordon – and that 50% Economists agree with Cameron and the other 50% wth Brown regarding the state(dire or rosy)UK Economy
yes but brown would make some Lazy bed dwelling Scum Bag from Salford The Captain
With tag removed
can hit your livingroom window from 200mts with a rock
Strauss out for 2 I am afraid. Where does that leave the theory?
He reduces those around him to tears of frustration because they cannot penetrate his aura of idiocy…
I like that!
I watched Brown on the Marr programme and again he failed to answer any of the questions put to him, just trotting out his set piece drivel like a Japanese made automaton. I just cannot ever imagine Brown speaking other than from rote learned comments. Give him a route and watch him trundle into the distance.
I youtubed Brown during his interview with Boulton in September and again saw his puce faced rage as he was not allowed to spout his comments.
Also I looked up Brown when he was smirking over the documents he had leaked to him when in opposition and then the Boom and Bust rap of him, which shows us just what a fool he is and how bad his handling of the country’s fiscal is.
Anyone wanting to cheer themselves up should have a look at it on youtube. Great!
in the end labour governments always run out of other people’s money
That’s Cameron with the needle, isn’t it?
I’m getting pretty good at this Monday morning Rich ‘n Mark character ID’ing.
You must be sober this morning.
Day 4. 27 to go.
But who’s counting?
D’oh! I thought it was James Purnell!
Looks like Dave’s going to be injecting the useless Oxygen thief with Polonium.
If you can draw as well as create punchlines, Guido could use you.
I’m going to take that as a complement. Unfortunately I can’t draw worth a shit. So I don’t.
Eh? Inject Polonium? Why would one do that? Is the oxygen thief an A-bomb that needs a trigger? Oh, right, got it.
Ballonium, perhaps?
What dog?
Is the joke meant to be that it rhymes with “doc”?
FFS Guido, get a cartoonist with a grain of talent.
Brown claimed to be the underdog against Cameron on Marr yesterday.
Pay attention.
Oh God, the usual heap of cartoon shite!
Guido, your portfolio is doing quite well.
Invest some in a decent cartoonist.
I see the usual Brown defenders are out already! A good effort from the resident cartoonists, I think.
Incidentally… Top surgeon to take on leading Labour MP and more from the under dog’s bunker
Maybe Professor Briggs can help, here?
And this is o/t but does anyone else think it strange that the Labour Party is allowing three Labour MPs to use the Labour Party’s own firm of solicitors to try to use the 1689 Bill of Rights to avoid being prosecuted for theft, etc?
What happened to the ‘Court of Public Opinion’ for such egregious crooks?
What happened is this:
“A bottle of your finest 1689 Vintage, waiter, if you please!”
Strange? Not at all – it’s completely in line with the standard rampant corruption, hypocrisy & doublespeak that we’ve come to expect from the Labour Party
I thought Brown was looking even more haggard and flaccid than normal on Marr yesterday.
Maybe it’s time for someone to give Britain’s worst dressed man a make-over.
http://women.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/women/fashion/article6974671.ece
Is he sitting or standing?
Even sitting down he looked like a mincer.
Because the mong IS a mincer.
I do sometimes wonder if Britains worst dressed man wears a corset… I watch him with his pouter pigeon thorax, trundling along a pavement accompanied by better dressed heavies… and think he looks very odd indeed… Maybe not… perhaps its a basque.
He probably wears his wife’s underwear.
Wife by Marriage. What you really mean is HouseMate.
May I suggest a nice tight hempen collar as part of the makeover – oh, and a lampost.
Brownologue:
Johnson: Why don’t you let me lead the party till the election?
Brown: What party? Is it Fancy Dress?
Johnson: The Labour Party, you Hoon!
Brown: Nice one Alan!
Johnson: But I’ve got Jack and Harriet already on board….
Brown: I see…
Johnson: I’m afraid so PM. The tide is turning
Brown: I get it……….A Boat Party!!!
Boat Party? Ask Prescott.
What galaxy is Brown on – totally deranged and deluded, Barry Obama
having trouble distancing himself from our great pretender.
No 10 claimed on Saturday that Mr Brown had agreed with Mr Obama to launch a new initiative to thwart the Al Qaeda group responsible.
‘Amongst the initiatives the PM has agreed with President Obama is US-UK funding for a special counter-terrorism police unit in Yemen,’ the statement said, adding that the plans had ‘been discussed in a series of phone calls since the failed plot’.
But that was exposed as spin yesterday when Mr Brown was asked in a TV interview whether he had spoken to Mr Obama. He replied: ‘Not directly.’
Meanwhile Darling insinuates the Cons have a big black hole in their figures.
Cut my legs off and call me shorty.
I think Marr simply thought he was just feeding Brown an easy line about talking to Obama only to find out he had unwittingly nudged Brown into a corner. Brown was then forced to admit no conversation had actually taken place and it became obvious the whole thing had been bluster and spin. Caught out by his own little lies
Entirely possible. But look how everything Brown utters is carefully designed to mislead. ‘discussed in a series of phone calls…’ – deliberately designed to leave you with the impression that Obama answers the Maximum Imbeciles phone calls on a regular basis when the truth is that the phone calls are no more relevant than me talking to my brother on the phone.
Every single thing the man says is a deliberately misleading sytatement. A lie.
‘We are uniquely placed to weather the global downturn…..’ Oh aye, we’re uniquely placed alright – we’re uniquely fucked.
‘Eliminate boom and bust…’ I meant Tory boom and bust.
The man is like some little child who thinks they’re being terribly clever by constantly redefining exactly what they meant when they caimed they didn’t smash the window.
‘You said I broke it with a stone…. but it wasn’t a stone .. it was a brick’. As if that somehow fixes the fucking window.
He is a jackass of the first order.
he is now ‘uniquely’ the underdog!!
his little smirks on marr made my skin crawl
He stinks. but I would offer my services (and my prosthetic leg) to kick that stinking sack of shit to death. Cheaper than polonium. and waaaay more fun!
I entered the Charades competition down the local pub. Thought I’d do a premature ejaculation. I came first
I wonder if Polly Toynbee has managed a bowel movement yet
Which orifice?
Ed “no” Balls talks balls in the Guardian.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2010/jan/03/change-conservative-eduction-politicies
Ed Balls: “The Tories and their media friends want the election to be a referendum on the government.”
Remind me, what is a general election all about again?
The only commenters who support him, (and there are very few) are obviously professional politicos, not “real people”.
No support, even from Guardian readers.
Cameron – You might feel a little prick
Brown – I thought you were taking my temperature
I have just got in to trouble at work for ‘spanking the monkey’ in the toilet.
But like I explained to them, the little bastard had pulled the hand dryer off the wall and had left banana peel all over the floor.
Fifteen reasons why even Peter Hitchens and Simon Heffer should vote Conservative. There is going to be red meat for the right.
http://conservativehome.blogs.com/thetorydiary/2010/01/fifteenpolicies.html
1.An end to taxpayer subsidy of the trade union movement:
2.Abolishing ID cards:
3.An annual cap on immigration from outside the EU:
4.An independent medical examination of every incapacity benefit claimant:
5.A recognition of marriage in the tax system:
6.Abolishing regional government:
7.Replacement of the Human Rights Act with a British Bill of Rights:
8.Moving public sector job advertising away from The Guardian and on to the internet:
9.The abolition of inheritance tax for all but millionaires:
10.The protection of private schools from interference from the Charity Commission:
11.Freezing the BBC licence fee:
12.A 10% reduction in the number of MPs:
13.The repeal of the ban on foxhunting:
14.Full renewal of the Trident nuclear deterrent:
15.A free vote on reducing the time limit for abortion:
Could we also have an EU referendum as originally promised by CMD just to show some good faith and honesty. Also could we up the 10% cut in MP’s numbers to 50% with expenses capped at 5k.
More honesty with the public over what powers our national governments actually have would not go amiss.
Sorry to disappoint all you chaps and chapesses but here in Brussels we have decided that this sort of rubbish can’t be accepted. No. Never. My mind is made up. You are in the EU now and soon will be driving on the right side of the road. Ha ha. And I mean the right, ‘right’ as in the best traditions of Europe. Yes. Your 15 points … oh my God, we have thousands over here, all queuing up to be enforced by the Eurofuzz and the Belgian army. Goodbye
The opening part of the Conservative manifesto will go something like this
What’s the difference between a cactus and the houses of parliament?
One has a load of pricks and the other is just a cactus.
Actually the question is whats the difference between a hedgehog and the houses of Parliment?
The hedgehog has all its pricks on the outside.
I’ll wager that isnt the first time McMental has had a prick from behind
We know what he got up to during his many summer holidays in Martha’s Vineyard.
Are you sure he was in Martha’s Vineyard & not Mandy’s Vineyard
Just seen Odious Balls on the BBC talking about NL’s new initiative of one to one tuition for early primary pupils ! Their aim ? To identify dyslexic 4 year olds ! WTF . I’ve had dyslexia sonce I was six monthes old and it has’nt dun me any harm.
On the same programme he was asked what his first word was. He didn’t know, but his younger brother’s first ‘Word’ was ‘Gerby’s pinched my peanut’ .
Which makes you wonder how old was he when he uttered his first word, and whether one to one tuition would have helped Odious count.
BTW my son’s first ‘word’ was ‘Balls is a wanker’. And that was when his head was poking out of his mothers ‘front bottom’.
sorry repost but same on GMTV he is aobviously doing the rounds
Balls to your partner our arses are against the wall says:
January 4, 2010 at 8:44 am
Balls again on GMTV being fed lines by that very impartial interviewer Kate Garropway (Draper)
This was an insuly to our intelligence but very few people watching GMTV realise the link between Garroway, Draper and Balls. The interview ended with Garroway feeding a line allowing Balls to state do you want education or IHT for your families. A complete setup from the start and a total con but people WILL be swayed by this.
Don’t dismiss GMTV as inconsequential this was a good interview for Balls as he was bowled underarms all the way and allowed to get in lots of lies without a single challenge and lots of impressionable people do watch that in the morning. Combined with Pravda there is a subliminal message being sent out all the time which if you attempted when advertising you would be stopped.
Meanwhile in the real world and not planet Labour Balls
National curriculum being ‘dumbed down’
A generation of schoolchildren is being failed because of the steady destruction of the traditional curriculum, according to research.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/education/6927322/National-curriculum-being-dumbed-down.html
Ask any science teacher in a state comprehensive and they will tell about dumbing down. The curriculum caters for ‘science for the masses’ It neglects those who may want to do Chemistry,Physics or Biology at University, or need a high grade ‘A’ level to do a science related course.
I would suggest that anyone who disagrees checks out the stats for state pupils entering medicine, dentistry or veterinary science.
Social mobility does not exist if you send your child to a state comprehensive. And that is not a slight on the teachers it is a criticism of what they are allowed to teach.
You do not need science to understand global warming
They did the same with Nufield Science and Nufield Maths in the 1970s. Both utter, utter disasters.
Normal rules of engagement do not yet apply as the election has not been called (equal time to all parties etc.). Labour wil hold out as long as possible and seek the easy ride, party message over and over again before the pistol is fired, every twist and trick in the book will be deployed, THEY MUST BE BROUGHT TO ACCOUNT, who will have the ‘balls’ to do it though?
What did he mean by peanut and pinched? Was this some form of sexual abuse or merely petty theft?
Blinky was on TV? That’s 20,000 more votes for the Tories, then.
Dont expect it. Easy ride on GMTV and Garroway made him look sane. Let him lie all the way and get in loads of soundbites. I nearly threw the remote at the fucking TV.
Not worried. TV companies adapt quickly when the political landscape shifts, as the BBC did four weeks before Blair was elected. By the way, nobody mentions Yentob’s family came from Iraq
GMTV must not let Kate Garroway do interviews with politicians between now and the election. How can she pretend to be impartial given she is married to Draper?
Agreed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Too bloody true!
Or… Kate Draper? Allowed to interview Labour politicians?
Garroway with ye!
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/showbiz/showbiznews.html?in_article_id=488244&in_page_id=1773
Observe the way Kate Draper spells her name.
They don’t call him Druggy Dave for nothing.
Is that meant to be some kind of Joke?
Oh yeah it is McBust said so
Cameron: im just going to shove this up your arse ,you might feel a little prick Brooon : Ok ,ok, but put that srynge down first !
Brown knows that the British love an ‘underdog’
He’s also started the blame-shift, “Don’t upset the recovery by voting the Tories in.”
The Tories won’t be able to stop the rot this time – they’ll only serve to absolve blame from Labour.
So let Labour win. Let them take their own poisoned chalice and be destroyed for good. Let the Tories fragment and regroup into something we actually want.
This is the ONLY way I can see the British people getting proper representation again. And yes – I do think we could be destroyed at this juncture in our history.
“Just a little prick Mr Brown; it’s just a little prick.”
remember the Rev Jim Jones in Jonestown !978 Gordon ?
Well this is Cameron in westminster Town 2010
And you ,You fat fuck are the last one
Camerooooon :Get Thee Behind Me Satan !
This you fat odious c*nt is sodium amytal !
once injected ,You Will Tell us Where You’ve Hidden The £200,000,000,000
you can’t possably have fucking spent it !
I’m really very, very excited at the prospect of ‘a new dawn in British politics’. Things are going to be so different! Change is a comin. Holy fuck!
You see Dave, the problem with your ‘please all the people all the time’ strategy is that it almost certainly guarantees the opposite outcome.
Frankly, at this stage I would view instances of serious civil unrest resulting from major public sector cuts as a rather reassuring sign. A series of strikes and a few blooded bobby’s will fuck the left for a generation. Just look how the Post Office and BA staff actions went down – there’s no public support for Luddites and pisstakers!
Cut everything! and then go back and cut it some more!
Oh and make the lazy bastards pay back the pensions they’ve stolen!
Bang on Eileen. But the strikes will start with the NHS. It will be the photogenic nurses front and centre, their faces twisted in hatred, who will be the pin-up girls for Labour’s post-election civil war.
Nobody gives a shit about the teachers or the council workers so when the post-election civil unrest and strikes kick off it will be the NHS. Cos we all love the NHS. How can you deny one million darling angels an inflation-busting pay-rise? After all if you can find umpty billion for the bankers surely you can find a 10p tax on the rich for the poor ickle nurses. And if you can find money for the nurses….
The nurses will be front and centre in Labour’s post election war on the voters.
also IHT
Everything will be related to that cut eg Bollox on GNTV this morning
do you want education or IHT?
spot every minister doing it from now on
do you want Nurses or IHT?
do you Police or IHT?
do you etc etc etc etc ad fucking nuaseum
The fact that we won’t get any of the above wont matter its the lie that counts.
Here ! Here !
Oh come come Gordon ,You must have felt a little prick in your arse before ?
yes but Peteris always so much gentle’r than you !
Hahahahaha… This could be something that Cameron should use, once thus used on television Brown would have to have a rethink!
McBroon.”There’s nae flies on me Dr Finlay only the marks where they’ve been.The Kingdom will be mine when ye put that in the Sassenachs’ water supply.”
DrFinlay.”Aye Mr Mc Broon and I’ll save an extra wee drop for Dr Cameron.”
The cartoon is wrong.
Dave’s not the vet.
We are.
The Electorate.
Those with the votes.
We are the ones who will desert Brown en masse.
We are the ones who will put him down; utterly humiliate him.
Bring it on.
anyone see this laughable piece in the observer by Will “credible” Hutton?
“If the Conservatives win this year, the severity of their proposed spending cuts could nip the renaissance in the bud. Tory high command thinks that the economy is one of their issues. As the feelgood factor returns as the year wears on, British voters may think twice before punishing the team that so successfully got Britain through the crisis – and risking prolonged economic stagnation. This year’s gathering economic recovery could yet be one of Labour’s strengths.”
http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2010/jan/03/uk-economic-recovery
Its the stupid, economy
Both these dogs need putting out of OUR misery.
Neither of them needs less than dispatch. The sooner the better.
I went into a library the other day and asked the librarian for a book on advice for giving midgets blowjobs.
She said: “How can you stoop so low?”
I said: “Yeah, that’s the one”
Fuck off!
I think that Somali guy in Denmark was looking for the wrong cartoonist.