Have had a few requests to speak at fringe events at the party conferences, so just to make the position clear – Guido is willing to do so, preferably in relation to areas of interest covered on this blog.
First come first served. Will be in Bournemouth with the LibDems on the Sunday and the Monday, will be with the Tories from Monday to Thursday. No one has actually asked Guido to speak on the Labour fringe yet…
Email guido.fawkes@order-order.com.
What’s the Point of Our Anti-Business Secretary? | Ruth Porter
Krugman is Seductive, Simplistic and Unrealistic | Jeremy Warner
Lower Taxes, Higher Growth, the Statistical Evidence | CPS
Bash the Unions, Gatecrash the Quangos | ConservativeHome
I Told You So: Euro is Doomed | Douglas Carswell
PM Speaks for the Nation When Bashing Balls | Quentin Letts
Time for an Alliance | Dan Hannan
Farage’s Plan | ConservativeHome
Guardian Open News is a Failure | Heather Brooke
Balls Calls for Deeper Cuts | Speccie
Lessons from the Thirties | CPS
PMQs Idiots | Harry Cole
Jon Cruddas is Not the Messiah | Dan Hodges
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Lord Lamont told ITV News…
“I think the PM is just human and Ed Balls is a pretty irritating person”
Strange that?
what about nulab
Who would have believed it?
Gordon has probably been too busy check out Gordon Brown’s ‘Edwina’ moment
London Muslim will not be attending any fringes although I do need a haircut
Ollie, that turned my stomach!
You should have seen the planned version, It was Mandelson instaed of Jacqui, I couldn’t stomach making it!
Christ alive…(sound of vomit striking bottom of paper bag)
Neat, simple and clever though
You could have had even more fun with a tiny little ginger minger sliding backwards and forwards with a big tattoo on her arse saying
“rocking the boat”
Oliver, you swine. I am now permanently put off sex and will have to join a monastery!!
A very nice one Ollie, I think you should offer the Mandy alternative anyway!
If anyone really wants a bad day, just picture the dark one squatting over a big Brazilian co*k and working himself up and down whilst running the country from his BlackBerry.
Where do all these voters come from!
Mandelson has considerable experience as a multi-tasker.
Dear God in heaven, Ollie. How depraved can you get? The thought is enough to induce projectile vomiting.
Guido, hopefully Nu Lab will be all fringe, all the time, after the next election.
To that end, it’s good that they won’t listen to anyone who is available to tell them what they are doing wrong.
Fourth term, my derriere.
But they’re all such great friends of this blog; I simply don’t understand it. Is Mr Hoon on holiday? I’m sure he’ll be phoning any minute now.
Someone say my name?
I am a Hunt.
That is all.
Cheer up, Geoff. You’re no worse than any other war criminal.
Labour’s next election winning PM won’t be one of those currently inside this out-of-touch and arrogant government. He or she will come from the part of the party that is listening, recognises what an absolute shambles Mandelson and co are, and can see what needs to be done to put right the many mistakes this government has made and is continuing to make.
Harman, Johnson, Miliband, Balls and the rest are in no position to see things objectively. I only hope Purnell is listening from his position on the back benches.
I really wish I could think of someone who meets the criteria and is brave enough to take on the poisoned chalice.
Hopefully socialists will never curse this country again.
Purnell is a slimy hoon obsessed by his vacuous career. Bag man to Bliar, non jobs in think tanks or BBC; the clown probably thinks manual labour is a Spanish socialist.
He only did the dirty on Brown because he thought he would precipitate Gordo`s destruction and was planning on getting a better job from the dozy postman: after all being Sec State for Lack of Work and Vanishing Pensions in the middle of a recession is not something he would want on his C.V.
And when the dozy postman bottled it Purnell must have decorated his toilet bowl ‘ hint of careerist ‘.
And next year he`ll have to vie for the leadership with Harperson, Miliband and ‘ But Gordon promised it to me ” Balls.
The next Labour Prime Minister hasn’t even been born yet
Saw a man trying to get out of a straight jacket at the Fringe in Edinburgh. It was probably the gorgon, but I did passingly think it might have been you Guido!
Always presuming that there will actually be a Labour conference this year, unless it is just to confirm Lord Sugarplumandelson’ status as Dear Leader.
I’m looking forward to the coverage of a party tearing itself to shreds, especially if Brown is deposed. Assuming the BBC covers it.
I think they go on holiday at this point. Seems to work for Nick R.
Nah – they’ll be too busy getting quotes from Norman Tebbit and Edwina Curry.
You know, those right at the heart of current Tory policy making and approach.
Under the orchestration of Mandy very unlikely to happen sadly, unless someone in the upper ranks suddenly develops some courage.
“In relation to areas of interest covered on this blog” Are you sure the politicians are quite ready for that ? !!!
They all live in their own little bubble, any thoughts from outsiders a no, no. Here is one idea that would hit them like a turd in a swimming pool. Let MPs pensions reflect the performance of the economy (like the rest of us). No fucking way, …you bastards. Food allowance more than the basic pension… you bastards, hate the fucking lot of you…!!!
Guido,
Labour think you are a Tory. They are too tribal to think past the end of their noses.
Guido is worse than a Tory, he does not support our NHS.
‘our’ NHS?!? – you muppet. It’s their NHS, namely the bureaucrats, managers, fake analysts, rubbish IT guys and general public service waste. Check this website out and try and find 1 useful purpose for it and i’ll send you a gold star and a couple of house points.
http://www.ic.nhs.uk/
Let me be clear about this. You get sick, you go to the NHS, you get better, you go home. End of story. Not with this webshite. You can now spend your whole life comparing your sad little story of an NHS statistic with every other sad little story of an NHS statistic. An unbelievable waste of money. The amount of people employed to keep this shower of a webshite going beggars belief. It’s the equivalent of the fire bridage (do we still call them that?) employing 500,000 people to publish statistics on the degree of charring / percentage roof damage / pipe buckling / concrete cracking / grass smouldering / window breakage / smoke damage / foundation subsidence / time to arrive / time to begin operations / time to put the fire out / time to fill in the paperwork / time to put the body bags away etc etc when your house burns down. Only possible under New Labour.
Examples of Death and Injury caused by Bureaucratic rationing
http://nationaldeathservice.blogspot.com/
The NHS is the worst treatment funded in the worst way.
The shame is that there are thousands and thousands of NHS employees who are employed not for the benefit of the nation or even the NHS, but in collecting and massaging target-related stats, for the sole purpose of the glorification of NuLiebore.
It’s where all those ex-doctor receptionist bitches work…
“No I’m sorry you can’t see a doctor today, is it an emergency? Go to A&E”. Click.
I’m trying to think of one useful purpose for you.
Neither do I. Bunch of dirty, incompetent murderers.
I’ve just finished paying off a loan I took out in 2003 to watch hopstiple telly after having me tinseols rebored.
Anon 1:47pm: actually, not supporting the NHS makes Guido far better than a Tory.
The whole foundation and concept of the NHS is a disgrace. why the heck would anyone be willing to go to a doctor who was a servant of the State and therefore beholden to it rather than duty bound to act in the best interests of the patient?
I have to cough up for private medical treatment when the need arises, because I never trusted private health insurance companies (thank god). This makes me more careful about looking after myself. If you have to pay every time to see a doctor and get medication, you become more aware of the importance of healthy living. In this respect the NHS has failed. All those fat, useless fuckers on the council estates across the country bleeding the country dry through their shitty dietary habits and lack of exercise. Anyone with a BMI over 25 should have to pay up-front to see their GP.
Agree with you in principle Sod’em, but BMI is a mindless way to measure obesity, as muscle ways more than fat, so just about all rugby players and a lot of other strength-based sportsmen are over 25. Try waist over 36″ instead.
SeA,
1. I agree the NHS is a financial incentive to NOT look after your own health! This is a disaster.
2. BMI is a useless measure for a lot of people. I have a BMI of 30, but I gym cycle or run every day for a hour.
so, let us get this straight anticitizen: you are big fat obese c’unt who is an american and who is living in this country and using the services of the NHS and who is moaning like a bitch about the services they provide you with.
fuck off anticitizen, you are full of shit.
you fat fuck, go easy on the donuts you lardy arsed cripple.
if you like private health care so much liar then fuck off back to america and pay for your own healthcare you scrounging bastard.
ps. and what about all the american companies that have made billions of pounds of profits from dodgy services and computer systems they have supplied to the NHS.
you are such a cretinous idiot it is untrue anti social citizen.
what a completely two faced c’unt.
Completely wrong on all counts as usual you deluded, mentally-ill, projecting troll.
How’s that Prime-Minister Postman prediction of yours coming along?
You are an example of how bad NHS mental health care really is.
wrong on all counts? hmm… you are an american, that is a charge you have failed to deny on atleast 3 occasions.
you are a lard arsed fuck as you have just admitted with your body mass index number and, finally, you are a total c’unt.
so I am infact right on all three counts.
oh, and you are full of shit because you are such a fucking liar that you are now denying all of these facts which are on the record.
so I am right on all four counts.
now fuck off you tit.
oh, and how very new labour of you to question people’s mental health.
how very, very new labour.
you’re a wanker anticitizen, end of story.
I am not American. I’m British you div.
you have had to explain yourself to me.
you are my bitch now anticitizen one.
oh, and I don’t believe your claim to be British, you are far too much a c’unt to be a decent British Citizen.
and if I am right that means you have just denied your citizenship of america.
you fucking judas.
Grow some balls Anonytroll, you publicly-funded waste of space.
Could this be a cunning plan to draw Guido into the ‘establishment’?
Tents and bodily functions spring to mind.
I believe he yearns for it.
If you knew anything about the work he was doing in the late 80s and early 90s, you’d know that if he’d wanted to be a part of it, he could have easily done so.
Labour always think like that if you are not with them all the way then you are “against” them. All their supporters I have met think like that. No use trying to have a meaningful discussion with them…very tribal.
Socialist groupthink always harks back to pre-capitalist hunter-gatherer-barbarism.
Underwater bananas traverse backwards towards Turkey, we hear?
Madaminadam
Seriously, although I was not impersonating Charles E Handle-Todger, I was actually trying to make a significant point.
The point I was making was about the intellectual and existential paucity-of-epistemology of GramscoFabiaNazi socialism. This was meaniong t hat the afforesaid Gr….Nazi crap was as applied within the real-time-setting of the UK, for the Children, in a very real, interactive and pro-active and strategically-focussed-way, in the context of this day and age.
WTF????
Third – invite some Afghan schoolgirls to be the international guest speakers
The existence of such a thing is proof in itself that our soldiers should be out there.
http://www.labourlist.org/conference-insurgents-hungry-energy-change-how-paul-richards
Guido, many of the the same fringe events travel to all of the party conferences. Often taking the form of discussions arranged by the press, with a panel of speakers and a q&a session afterwards.
You could easily be on the panel for one of them.
Why not ask them when you’re at Bournemouth?
I do hope you receive one from NuLab Central. I should be particularly interested to read the away fixtures results.
If you do, G, refuse anything that is meant to be put in your mouth!
Food and drink!
Back from holiday straight into the silly season!
Watch out for hidden camera, Guido!
Never trust anyone who has a hidden agenda.
NuLab getting a new orifice torn on “Face The Facts”. Delicious, minders in tow if they film in a job centre and only allowed into a centre chosen by Labour. Very Soviet and horrifying. Good for R4! What irony to be recruiting from the jobless to man job centres because there are so many jobless! Hey, 8 million new job centre staff, sorted!
If you’re going to the Labour Conference make sure you bring lots of merchandising. Your cartoons should appeal to the locals.
Good on you Guido. Let ‘em have it.
Go for it Guido. No tears about Nulab.
Don’t forget to claim for mileage, hotel costs, entertaining, secretarial services, phone calls, internet costs, shredded dead trees, groceries and presents for Mrs Fawkes and the nippers.
Well if you cum t’labour conference keep t’hands of My fooking pies.
Do Lord and Lady Kinnock still go to these conferences? What a load of fun they must be as they sing their old Italian revolutionary songs.
Avanti populo, bandiera rossa, bandiera rossa triumphera!
Bandiera rossa triumphera (refrain x 3)
E viv’il communismo e liberta!
(‘scuse absence of accents at four points)
four pints more like
Or you’ll get a good fuc*king left hander in the teeth! Me I’m above the law mate, eat fist, I’ll eat all the pies and shag the sec’s
You couldn’t hit a croquet potato you oaf. Lardin it up at tax payer bread and butter donations you spud. Tata and take your two Jags wiv yer. Nah.
Change your pants!
Cameron his chickened out of dumping Duncan. In the words of The Mail, ‘you couldn’t make it up’. It’s that last straw for us. The Cons say one thing and mean another. Who on earth to vote for now? UKIP?
I will not vote for DC unless he stands by his convictions and gets rid of these people.
By keeping Duncan on, DC has shown that he is spineless.
That’s it for me. I’ll vote UKIP – if I’m still living here by then.
I was never going to vote for DC, but this just makes me feel even more correct.
Yep, joined them a couple of years back. Dave can spin on his fucking green windmill while talking shite about global warming and hugging some hoodies.
Cameron has just blown the goodwill many had towards him. If he really believed what he said about both his own fury over MPs expenses and understanding the pure anger of the public, he’d oblige Duncan to step down. I don’t know why I should be surprised – he’s an MP and not one of them can tell the truth. He’s lost another 2 votes in this house.
Fuck off Dave. Never fell for your shite in the first place. This just confirms it. No fucking votes from me either, you gutless, spineless, Pinko cυnt. Fucking centre-left Blair Clone!
No great surprise – Duncan’s sexuality means he’ll always get away with more than the average Tory, as he helps them look PC to the Nulab and Lib Dem voters they’re trying to woo.
I’m voting UKIP again because I know it makes sense.
Duncan is an idiot, but Cameron must have his reasons for not cutting him loose – the general public will be pleased to hear that MPs are on rations, jest or no jest
you must be stoned, right?
alan duncan has deeply offended those who work for a living.
he is an ungrateful ponce. as is david cameron.
birds of a feather and all that. innit.
MPs are NOT on rations. They’re still troughing.
In a year’s time, the rest of us will be close to starvation.
If CMD doesn’t sack this craven, worthless, troughing arse-bandit, he can kiss goodbye to at least 6 votes from me and those immediately around me.
“No one has actually asked Guido to speak on the Labour fringe yet…”
Shame !!
Because they know he’ll open a few cans of worms they’d rather be kept closed.
try the edinburgh fringe, there’s still room
Remind all of these troughers of what Tony Blair said
“WE ARE SERVANTS OF THE PEOPLE”
Don’t treat us like idiots, because we will find out.
We want consenual, cabinet government with a strong Whitehall.
We do not want Executive Government, SpAd’s and No. 10 bunkers.
Also, charity begins at home – so sort domestic issues as a priority over foreign issues – like Afghanistan.
The A’stan war started after the talibs harboured and supported “Alky Aida*” even after 9/11.
I’m not sure nation building can work in the absence of a nation, or a civilisation.
Personally I think we should bounce the rubble of tribes in pakistan/afghanistan who harbour the Talibs, and not nation build. Unlike EYE-raq there is not a single common demos to build a democracy from.
*As pronounced by G.Brown.
Not a bullet will be fired.
Since when has Afghanistan been a domestic issue?
“THEY ARE SEWERVENTS UNDER THE PEOPLE”
http://skovpape.dk/blog/blogimages/banksy_bristol/banksy_bristol7.jpg
says it all.
I suggest Weasels are a more appropriate animal
Vultures?
Cock Roaches!
Rats.
Maggots.
Lizards
Police dogs
ignumen wasps?
http://superquickie-saurabhh.blogspot.com/2009/07/ignumen-wasp-invades-ants-nest-that.html
The entire exhibition was a piss take of the nanny state,Banksy not a labour stooge then!What did labour achieve by granting free entry to museums?
It hoped to silence critical artists like this and so nationalised all venues ,bucked the market and forego much needed income .At least 100,000 tourists have been to this display and what did they part with? NOTHING
fucking clever eh?
Labour activists will need to grow a collective conscious and let their voice be heard to remove those that seek (but actually do not) govern in their name.
Mandelson and Balls will attempt to shut down any critical debate of the leadership.
Unless Labour activists suddenly grow the balls to stand up to these bullies, I suspect that no one (never mind Guido) will be speaking at the Labour Party conference fringe meetings.
You may be on the fringe Guido but I’m more interested in the fringe benefits of being The Prince of Darkness.
It’s fascinating how this creepy creature has mysteriously managed to become entirely debt free and fabulously wealthy as a mere public servant.
Of course, at the start of the ZanuLabour Terror in Year Zero (formerly known as 1997) the Politburo lead by Tony Marat, Cherie deFargue, David Talleyrand-Millipede, Gordon de Sade and Peter Robespierre had clear ambitious to “destroy the forces of conservativism” and guillotine the decent values that they so despised in the ancien regime, known as the United Kingdom. In collaboration with the Scottish Jacobins, these ruthless brutes have systematically plundered the national wealth and undermined the English speaking people.
Like other thugocracies before them, they have simply replaced one elite with another, destroyed the national will, eliminated liberty and replaced it with a brute authoritarianism and lined their own pockets to a sickening degree.
Time for the people to rise up and remove this rabble.
Let’s start building the barricades now! If this was France, the people would have risen up and demanded the dissolution of Parliament.
The French would have brought the country to it’s knees by now.
Even if we did demonstrate, we wouldn’t be allowed within cooee of the HoC. I remember someone saying that crowds wouldn’t be allowed within half a mile of the place.
May as well wait another 11 months. The mood of the wider public should be positively incandescent by then. Plus there’ll be a lot more unemployed with time on their hands to get involved and help out.
Why the hard graft? Just set all the Traffic Lights to Red. The whole place would come to a standstill but you could still catch a minicab if you need to go some place.
It’s always worth waiting for comments by TGR. Top stuff
He does seem to be remarkably on the ball……
(not in any sinister way,,, just well worth reading)
There is more chance of my dirty pants being seen at our conference than Guido.
More of a guarantee. Bringing Tracey along for the ride?
You should see her skidmarks!
Fawkes
I first read that as “Guido on the minge”
Then remembered that you are a married and have a sex life only slightly less parched than my own.
I read that police were going to do background checks around the venue at Brighton this year.
The big burley plod can check my background area anytime
They’re checking the background of the venue?? Blimey, that’s thorough!
I think they’ll discover Brighton is full of shirt-lifters, so certain members of the government will feel right at home.
Left at home, shurely ?
No. Were knocking everyone up door to door, one at a time and afterwards we will then asking them if they are anti-territorial terrorists or living out of Brighton. It was in the news.
Yes its true, they are claiming the “right” to enter my home of over ten years,-150 yards behind the Brighton centre to: I.D me,my partner and two kids with passports and utility bills. Then maybe an interview for us to show WE are not terrorists. They bring a bunch of twats,crooks and war criminals into MY backyard and THEY get the protection. If they do reap the whirlwind they sowed it will be my children they have put in harms way. Surely they need a warrent for such an invasion into someones home?
Love Dixie
I’m sure we wouldn’t have the requirement for this public ‘service’ under a UKIP democratic elected representitive. I want a Government or national leader who would need to fight off (figuratively speaking) -fight off autograph fans and advise local home owners to go easy on the ticker-tape and bunting in case it causes a shortage at christmas.
Dixie, you seem to be under the old-fashioned misapprehension that you still enjoy some basic rights in Britain.
You need a reality check, mate. Since from around 1985, you enjoy FUCK ALL rights. They’ve been progressively whittled away by Conservative and Nu Labour governments. Spying on the electorate is now routine. It now requires no special permits and *every* government department, now matter how high or low is encouraged to do it, at every level. It’s even subbed out to private companies with more than 3 staff who routinely abuse it and flog the print-outs to the Sunday Express. And that’s just around 2.5% of it.
So congratulations!!!!! Your party is really representing you well!
Vote Labour: vote quasi-transparency!
Here’s me thinking it was the Fringe, part of the Edinburgh Festival. I must keep up here in Utopia.
I shit in all of your faces and you do nothing,.
That means that I win.
You didnt elect me nor my slave Gordon McMental.
You deserve me
Hoons
Hello?
LOL
Having said which the Labour tactic of slash and burn any potential threat has left a lot of empty space around GB. Maybe, just maybe he needs some guests to populate the thinning ranks and echoing halls that he now finds himself in.
Unrelated topic but…Steve Morgan is not finished yet. He’s moved on to burson marsteller.
http://www.bursonmarsteller.co.uk/newsitem_show.php?item=11&hmID=1
I hope you are as thrilled as I am
Steve Morgan commented, “The team and I are really pleased to be joining and we look forward to driving synergies and becoming the leading Market Access specialists.”
Some just will not flush.
Is that the new Honda? Nice for some.
Gott in Himmel!! – BM used to be ein class act once – vot on earth do zey vont vis dis Dumbkopf?
Triumph Acclaim!!
read all about it, read all about it……….
LABOUR CUTS – FRINGE
Is there free beer?
Only asking like…..
Nah, do not trouble yourself Guido.
Political Party’s are soooooooooo 1997.
So looking forward to meeting you in Manchester, Mr Fawkes!
Are you bringing any of those nice cricketing gentlemen with you?
well I’ll be harvesting my crops in my Jersey garden around then but I’ll try to find a replacement …… hows about Mark Ramprakash…..?
Oh he will do very nicely! We can have a twirl around the dance floor.
I’ve heard of matchmakers in cricket but this is getting a little silly. And you’ve scared Freddie off!
O/T More soldiers bodies returning through Wootton Bassett on Pravda at the moment. I’ve lost count of the number of cabinet ministers there showing their support.
We would go but they never sang at a talent contest so therefore they don’t count
Ainsworth set out in his Reliant Robin but his engine blew up on the way.
He can’t visit as he’s still got all the school cleaning and maintenance duties to do during the school hols’. ( Bob Ainsworth – Derek Guyler).
” I’ll have you Butler” – John Alderton.
Butlerrrrrrrrrrr!
Breaking News @ 6.10pm
On top of these recent 4 dead .BBC has just announced that nother 3 soldiers killed yesterday by IED on foot patrol in Sangin bringing total to 199 dead
“I never at any stage expressed the hope, expectation, promise or pledge that we would leave Afghanistan without firing a shot.”
John Reid MP, former defence secretary, House of Commons, 13 July 2009.
CAREFUL YOU DON’T GET TRICKED INTO SELLING YOUR VERY SOUL GUIDO:
“The greatest trick the devil ever played was convincing us he doesn’t exist” and also: “And no marvel; for Satan himself is transformed into an angel of light.”
2 Cor 11;14
(ask Lord Mandlescum and his Pals (Satan’s Little Helpers) for details…)
Have you heared my Symphony for the Jocks?
….penned by “King” James I / VI, around the ‘Stone of Scone’ mayhap???
Yes I believe it is the Norwegian symphony – a four movement tour de force in which the weak and defenceless salad dodgers are crushed to the delight of their English betters
“The vessel with the pessel is in the chalice of the palace….but the flagon with the dragon holds the brew which is true”….
Gordon Brown, your rentboys took one hell of a beating!
This is a windup isn’t it? I can’t believe you would contemplate doing the Labour Conference even if asked. Are you mad?! Possibly being in the same building as Jonah Brown??!!?? Fuck! What if you found yourself in the same room or……Christ, it hardly bears thinking about……if he passed you by so that you were exposed to the aura of the curse.
Brave boy, Guido; but don’t do it. Think of the children.
I have to say what a lovely example of “what goes around comes around”. Labour reaps the whirlwind while not having much racial understanding of what they have started. You just could not make it up you just could not.
A Labour minister has reacted with fury after he and his wife were ordered into separate rooms at a Muslim wedding. Jim Fitzpatrick stormed out of the London Muslim Centre after being told that strict Islamic rules meant his wife Sheila would have to move into another room.
The minister for food and farming, who was attending a constituent’s wedding at the centre, claimed the segregation of men and women at such events was affecting ‘social cohesion’.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1206296/Muslim-wedding-segregation-fury-Minister-wife-ordered-separate-rooms.html
Oh dear.
The minister for food and farming would do well to remember that it was his party who were happy for muslims to continue their beliefs.
You reap what you sow, don’t you.
They still do that at my golf club. This Fitzpatrick cove must be a bit thick if he didn’t realise the gentlemen and the ladies would be separated in that way. I hope he didn’t ask for a G&T.
No! He was looking for a nice pork sausage!
I’m free!
I’m expensive
you’re boring me mr sausage
Don’t remind me of Prezza
He threw a strop at a wedding?!?! Gadzooks – not only stupid and unrefined but tossers too. Standard operating Labour procedure. At what point does anyone give a monkeys if the blokes are separated from the lasses at a wedding? ‘Oh yes, please do tell me about the dress, flowers, honeymoon plans, bridesmaids etc etc as i’m really chuffing interested!’
He thought he was the guest of honour – you know – one above the Bride and Groom.
Your’e mince
would that be Fitzpatrick of the Scottish Mafia..? He’s an utter twonk. I’ve no idea what talent this man has and so wonder in amazement at the position he holds.
I bet the BBC didn’t report this
Would he also storm out of a Jewish Wedding where men and women are always segregated in the Synagogue.
I find it rich that a non-muslim should be telling the faithful how to run their ceremonies.
High handed ZaNulabour interference is just in their blood – they know best and will ride roughshod over all those who get in their way.
Obvisiously Jim is doesn’t need the Muslim vote in Poplar and Canning Town.
Role on the election when we can send this self interested idiot with no interest or understanding of rural affairs and farming back to the Glasgow Fire Brigade as shop steward.
…and it’s going to be even more hilarious in several years hence when she is forced by a uk shari_a court to get all burqa’d up.
Nothing like that ol’ apartheid
Mandleson ,in Hartlepool ,cannot afford to repair his leaking roof .
“Do you know”,he sobs ,”There was water running down the wall of my living room . Sob,Sob,Sob ”
His answer to the problem was to sting the taxpayer for £3000 just 3/4 weeks
before sloping off to Brussels (he is no quitter ,our Gloria )
His job brought him into contact with a Russian billionaire for whom Mandleson did not hesitate to do a £50 million favour (all within the rules–one would not expect otherwise would one )
Therafter, Mandleson has been loaded with cash and virtually paid cash for
a £2.4 million London home.
This man (by now a noble queen ) is as honest as the day is long .
Is that agreed in the court of public opinion ?
Presumably the day you refer to is Midwinter’s day at the North Pole.
Ah yes, but give the man his due, he is a real multi tasker, he can have a little sojourn in Corfu to hob nob with the Rothschilds and the Freuds, hob nob with dodgy Russians, in fact hob nob with anyone, all while bobbing up and down on a knob and running the country from his BlackBerry!
This man has yet to appear on Britain’s Got Talent, but I bet it won’t be long.
A more honest man I have yet to find, he’s even more honest than me and that’s saying something
hobbing or knobbing?
If he does have another income, has he declared it? I thought it was against House Rules not to.
We need someone who can delve a bit into Mandleson’s past. I’m sure it would make very interesting reading.
Don’t think ‘house rules’ apply when dealing with the dirty scum that is Natty de Rothschild. Utter utter scum.
I thought they had to delcare all their interests. If Mandleson has made money from whatever means, it has to be declared.
No. He decalared himself a national treasure and insured himself against meltdown
Dear Mr shelling
Have you not heard of offshore bank accounts and never forget that the only Inland Revenue ( as it used to be ) special investigator to request certain MPs tax details, was fitted up and sacked! without further ado or indeed further investigation.
They are, despite any minor huffs puffs and exposures well above the law!
Point taken.
Oh Guido, you can play with my fringe event anytime you like!
I heard that when you were born, shares in silver reflective glass hit the ceiling. You were so ugly at the time that england’s only plastic surgeon emigrated.
Don’t feel to hard done by if you are not invited to the Labour conference, you can always read about it.
A mere two years since the last Sion Simon epic:-
http://www.newstatesman.com/blogs/conference/2007/09/labour-majority-increase
The sequel, to be penned after the 2009 Labour conference will be unmissable, or not
Unreadable shite!
LabourList suggestions to improve the Labour conference….
Third – invite some Afghan schoolgirls to be the international guest speakers. The existence of such a thing is proof in itself that our soldiers should be out there.
Fourth, let Gordon Brown do a Q&A. But this time let the delegates ask the questions directly, without filtration. We could invite members of the public in too. And perhaps we can draft some new jokes?
The aim being to improve the Party’s public image. Apparently.
There are no Afghan schoolgirls
I could improve it a lot, for ever in fact, by adding just a little wrap of gelignite to the coffee maker.
nah, skip the Q&A and go straight to the lynch mob.
I weelly wonder whats Alan done wong. He’s quite wite in what he said. We’re all on washions now. I’m wacking my bwains out wonedring how we’ll manage. But, hey ho it’s the gowose season now and like my wurwal weetweat, Balmowal, it does my nicely for the time being.
I say Steenie, this how-d’ye-do over expense claims must be upsetting the old noggin – you’ve forgotten how to spell your own name!
I’ve been wowwied about all this outwage and my wite hand shakes wather wuwingly so I weegwet any typos.
If your wife’s hand is shaking, I’d take advantage of a golden opportunity if I were you.
you taking the piss, schmuck?
O/T
French telly news reveals that the growth in their economy was caused by the ‘cash for clunkers scheme.’
It’s a temporary blip probably and Lagarde, Finance Minister was really surprised!
Nevertheless, better than the news from the United Condom!
that’s because they still have a large, domestically-owned car industry, and that majoring on smaller cars.
UK imports >80% of its cars. Not one of UK top-ten best-selling cars in July was made in UK. UK scrappage scheme boosted Korean, French, German, Japanese and Italian car-makers. Oh, and your largest remaining car-maker, by headcount, the Indian-owned Jag/LR, its owner, Tata Motors, has just had its credit rating reduced to ‘B’, one level above junk bond status.
The other point is if this had happened in the United Condom then the Torture Party would have announced this as a massive triumph!
Lagarde, a woman who can count, expressed surprise.
I am very happy with my small French car and ecstatic to have gone native in Europe.
Jaguar is a massive Triumph IMO
I will save the jobs at Vauxhall
I don’t have one, I am pure Jewish Illu_minati bloodline
No I don’t mean non existent jobs at Vauxhall, I mean foreskin!
Yeah, – hire another platform vending machine stuffer
Ivor, you’re thinking of the glorious Jaguar-Rover-Triumph combine, a nationalised institution created by the meddling of Tony Benn…
For a moment I thought you meant the Edinburgh fringe. . .
I’ve got a bad case of droopy jaw.
EEEzz trying the old Blair smirk as well!
Gordon is an image promoters nightmare, unless the image you want to project is from Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein, another lightening bolt or two needed to animate this monster.. Like the sound of a door being heavily slammed in the background mid-way through, adds gravitas (not) disgruntled employee?, called Hazel?.
It’s life, Jim, but not as we know it.
I still remember when Thatcher tried and she just looked stark staring bonkers a case of morphing into her Spitting Image character.
I handled it for 3 seconds!
What atrrrible way to spend 3 seconds.
I’ve watched enough. Wanker.
If Daisy really has decided to hang on to that troughing little wanker Duncan, then that’s it.
There’s no one to vote for. So I’m voting against.
UKIP for me.
NO MORE BOOM AND BUST AH TELL YE!
Isn’t it wonderful when their lies have been taped for all to see and they can’t deny what they’ve said.
Quite! they can’t deny it but they still do anyway, just in case the original can’t readily be found, ah the joy of the Internet ( for us )
What I find amazing is that MSM journalists can’t seem to find google…
It’s nice to see Hain, Prescott and Blair behind The Great Lump of Misery as a reminder that politicians who seemed to be there for ever can disappear like dew in the morning.
And this country is best placed to withstand the recession. Pardon? No actually that is what I said but I was pointing at a map of Germany and France at the time so I was correct as I always am. I am, I am, I am.
Meanwhile at ZNL HQ a warning buzzer sounds and flashes red on the control panel. Lord Mandlebum picks up the telephone directly linked to the Kirkaldy bunker.
“Nurse, please ensure that Gordon has a very good night’s sleep tonight”
“A double-dose sounds very sensible”
There will be no further alerts for now and Lord Mandlebum doses off musing about how safe the country is in his hands.
Guido do you think Mcbride and Wheelan will be owing you a pint ??
You would probebely take the piss anyway at labour conference “balanced books with investment , getting on with the job etc etc .
Will be interesting how you get used at events , who gives you gossip ?? At least we will get to know whose smoozing who .
re your topic At some point certain bloggs will fullfill certain markets , some will want broadsheet some red top , Guido is like private eye , but with instant response and markets/city news , pretty good so far , depends wether you want debate or comment I suppose .
no more buns, he’s scoffed the lot.
That must be how Prescott started out!
Gordon won’t want you there after the nasty cartoons about him LOL
And McMental is a total hetero who has never been caught sucking Fondlebums cock by a member of the Met ?
Ahahhahah
Gordon Come out of the closet
Then we have one less reason to hate you.
Fucking Hell
The country is now run by a bonkers Tom “cruiser” and an open poof.
God help us all
Guido your well clear from it anyway they holding the conference in Liverpool LOL
You’d don’t want your hubcabs nicked by the scousers.
My bad the one in Liverpool is 2011
I grew up in Knotty Ash. Now they will be sleeping in my back yard(Now live behind Grand Hotel). Would nick wheel caps except some gorrilla from Thames Valley Poo-Lice would probably put a cap in my arse. These under trained bullys love to feel big. It would feel a lot safer if all armed Feds came out or were given: *penis extensions/ built up shoes. *delete as appropriate. Come Liverpool 2011 my fellow scallys will only have a chance to nick the losers bike wheels and seats. Although I hear the one-eyed one, the brown-eyed one and many others prefer their bikes without seats!
love Dixie
I know Knotty Ash, famously. They should reopen the JamButty Mines.That would sort out the economy and I could say again, proudly, how tickled I am!
Yes and u never gave me a Christmas box when I was your paperboy. I hold a grudge till this day. How not tickled was I
tossers
Is that part of a commentary on the Highland Games?
Which boyfriend did the decorating?
Anne lied.
Cameron says Duncan should share the anger of the public at the mess of expenses in Parliament. Does that mean they both are furious with themselves for dipping their snouts in the trough? Rich men robbing the poor taxpayer.
Cameron should have sacked Duncan on the spot. All he got was a slap on the wrist, which tells me that Dave is quite happy with the situation.
Not good enough!
yet another THREE!!! lost in Afghanistan
Sky Breaking News
Three British soldiers have been killed in an explosion in Afghanistan – bringing the total UK death toll in the country to 199.
I hope this government rots in hell for its crimes against these guys.
I’ll bet they were not riding in MRAP vehicles.
They’d most likely be alive if they were.
I forgot to add R.I.P. Soldiers.
Die In Pain Labour.
Is Mark Thompson – Director General of the BBC- so dopey that senior BBC types can manipulate the news agenda to suit their left wing smugness without fear of censure in any way ,shape or form ?
Mandleson is getting away with murder on the BBC airwaves.
Has Thompson instructed news staff to protect Mandleson ?
If so, why ?
I understand that Thompson is hetrosexual so it is unlikely that he seeks sexual favours from the noble queen but nothing surprises nowadays .
What about money ? Is Thompson short of cash ?
I t could be ,now that his expenses scams have been revealed.
Since Mandleson chummed up with Russian billionaires and the waspish Nat
money seems to be no obstacle to the prince of slime so a few grand to replenish the Thompson wine cellar would seem to be a mere bagatelle.
Whatever the truth, there is something corrupt at the BBC and like a cancer it must be cut out (starting with the revolting Kisty Wark )
Perhaps the Met should raid Broadcasting House .
No doubt the Hon. Member for Ashford would lend a hand .
“Perhaps the Met should raid Broadcasting House” , the Met? about as much use as the serious fraud squad when asked to leave off filling in the expenses claims, as me old mother used to say, and she was on intimate terms with Inspector Nacker of the Yard.
I’d like to see a proper met investigate the IPCC for a start
he’s scotch. fifth columnist.
Mark Thompson is very proud of his supposed physical resemblance to a certain russian by the name of LENIN.
That’s all you need to know for now.
Thompson is a Common Purpose drone. His job is to support the ZaNu elite at all times.
Should be Kirsty — you know that pseudo intellectual scottish dumbcluck .
Yeah. I’d be glad to see her fired. Smug cow.
I think she is quite sexy in, you know that pseudo intellectual scottish dumbcluck….. over fifty….. kind’ a way, days must be numbered though what with the BBC’s track record on ageism.
I’d giver one and I’m only 60. My Auntie Kirsty was named after her you know?
Guido please don’t lower yourself to speak to the Lib Dems. You will be the only one with views at the conference.
Guido, lower yourself.
Worra bout me and me luvly tits?
that’s me sorted. Election victory next Spring, then off to the World Cup to follow George and the boys. Oh yes!
He did nae mention next Spring?, doomed I tell ee we are all dooomed!
FDHOAWOR’1
guido aint that a good sign ? jonah dont wanna know ?
It’s the only thing to do with Osborne’s plans.
Allo, another poster with ‘Red’ in his name.
Must be a twat.
And you must be very sad and lonely
I think ‘sad and lonely’ just about trumps a twat, so, as you were.
I would imagine a Lib Dem fringe meeting being akin to a CofE Alpha course.
Then again I could be wrong and like Convent Girls they know how to Party.
Lembit is a hoot after half a dozen tequila slammers
Him or you? I’d need a dozen to even look at him.
Frank Zappa wrote a song about “Catholic Girls” Who would have thought Major and Currie. Who said politics is porn for ugly people?
I’ll bet there’s more shagging goes on at conference,than at a club 18-30 holiday.
Dear Guido
Remember get a receipt if you get paid in readies just in case
someone wants you to be the story.
There are wicked people out there.
Yours sincerely
George Laird
The Campaign for Human Rights at Glasgow University
fuck thats the first senisble comment you made well done lad
Even a broken clock is right twice a day freddie.
O/T Why would the Lockerbie Bomber be released on compassionate grounds after being found guilty of mass murder? Not being a great fan of conspiracy theories normally,the story that he’s just a patsy and is released because of his innocence,has more legs. Something smells to high heaven.
because he isn’t English
He can’t spend the reward if he’s in clink.
No. I’m not having that. The only people calling for his release has been the likes of Jim Swire who believes that Al Magrahi was the fall guy for a cover up.
Does this precedent mean that Ian Brady can look forward to freedom?
Mandelson=Dale Winton , hadnt really made the connection , super market sweep anyone pay your £2.5mn mortgae off pronto ,you gotta dash for the cash !! well at least its now officiall he has no intention of becoming labour leader , however we should assume hes working somthing .
Quite enjoyed last nights news Night shame John Redwood didnt get more time to illuminate the problem , what bit i did get was that the money is not getting to business because the banks are using liquidity (under FSA insttruction) to bankroll the Goverment . If John is correct then what a pack of lies the goverment have been telling us , the bankers money is effectively stoking up a political state waste scheme and the price is starving business and recession for private business. So is it another sort of ponzi scheme , the state banks need fattening up for sell off , but isnt this just making the grass roots of the economy weaker and local trading unstable .
As reported last week a meat supplier was being asked to deliver on credit terms to customers as they could no longer get overdrafts or credit , as some of these business went bust the poor butcher was left with the loss , so the medium sized producers and distributors have been taking a hit .
There is somthing sytemic and chronic about this , all along labour have been telling us we sre supporting buisness , when in actual fact , private business has been absorbing the ecnomic impacts . yet here is the disater in waiting , the small businesses which provide the local economy with its life blood is being starved . If it dies so does the local economy .
Unlike the pain of the 80s which was tragic but sector specific , what gordon is now doing is national and indescrimate ruin to private business .
this will come to haunt Labour in the comming months , as it is creating other instabilities , it is a wonk policy with longterm damage causing problems for towns as there economy shrinks
Are we in the ‘Phoney war’ stage of this recession that’s what worrys me.
Lots of bad news but no real pain for the majority thus far.
This doesn’t yet feel like the 80s recession and the longer this calm lasts the more I get worried.
Too right. End of October looks like shit fan time
Why?
I think it will be feb/march , jobless figures may have peaked , but there will be this toxic legacy of weak spending and either inflation will arrive or interest rates will start on the up , add to it the need for taxation increases and we could be short on spare cash , and in the difficult situation of an unbalanced economy , high benefit claims, low tax reciepts .
thats the wierd thing in a real wealth boom , money flows and each ecnomic unit or system acts to contribute , however as we have effectively had a goverment sponsored turbo charger that has imbalanced the banks and made them behave in a greedy way , and relied on imports to keep down inflation .
Wealth via a credit boom always was wreckless , it wasnt reflecting the actual Uk economy .
Tonight’s ten o clock news had all the ingredients of a classic pravda bulletin:
Negative stories about two tory MP’s
Global warming causes glaciers caps to melt.
The recession…oh look france and germany are back in growth, while the UK remains in recession. So you see, nudge nudge, we should have joined the euro after all. (what they didn’t do, of course, was show the clip of snotgobbler saying that the UK was “best placed” to weather the recession. That has now been airbrushed from history by Pravda’s Winston Smiths. It was never said…)
Anyone notice yesterday how the unemployment figure changed with each news presenter some where saying 2.1 million some saying 2.6 million worse in 10 years, worse in 14 years.
Talk about unreliable service.
Your money well spent…not.
Russia Today and Fox News are looking like zeniths of impartiality these days compared to Aunty Beeb.
Mandelson is the politicians politician. You may hate him,but you’ll come to love him like a big brother.
When did they let you out ?
When i realised that he couldn’t be killed.
God help us all when the EU dies in the future.
War will break out as bankrupt countries and populaces start pointing the finger at each other for why they are in such a state
Just when I thought the Labourgraph couldn’t get any worse after the expert “analysis” on p2 today by its political correspondent James Kirkup (SHOULDN’T THAT BE COCK-UP – ED) said the base rate was 0.25 per cent. Doh!..up pops Dozy Rosa Prince on the Sky News Paper Review, apalling. truly appalling. How did she ever get a job? anyone know?
She looks good on camera,and she’s probably shagging someone in the production dept. Or she has deep political and financial analysis.
See the same Guardian hack who brought you the “hotmail plot” to depose Brown (there wasn’t one – even though some might say there should have been} is now saying Cameron will cut the pay of his ministers according to TWO unnamed”SENIOR Tory sources”.
What utter, utter rubbish. Like that’s ever going to happen.
Still, hats off to the barmy Guardian hackette and the even barmier goofs who allowed it into the sliding-sales paper.
Nah, don’t think Dozy Rosa got the gig via Sky production, someone far lower down the food chain.
RESIGN YOU AUTISTIC Hunt.
If Cameron is unable to make a decent fist of being opposition leader,what hope is there if he becomes PM. To get shot of Brown and the hole in the arse gang,only to find Butch Cameron and Sundance Osbourne with the keys to the safe isn’t much improvement. And what senior position would Duncan hold? God help us all.
Has Dan Hannan done the NHS a diservice ?? Well its going full on in the USA , its difficult to not be gratefull for the NHS , you need treatment , no quibble over correct documents, you get it .
perhaps Dan was thinking more about where the NHS has it faults in how it spends its money , there are many emotions that come with medical care mainly centered around its life/death abilities . So everyone bangs on about the social responsibility of medical/ health care , but if there is social responsibility to the NHS then there must also be a responsibility to offer Quality and value . The flaw is that it can lose its goals as it becomes a function of the state , swine flu jabs show this perefectly govt are paying £6 for a jab that costs £1 to produce . Why did the goverment not get the jab at £2 a unit ?? it may after all be nothing more than mild flu . Yet they have hyped it up spent a load of cash advertising its fear factor and someone has made a lot of money .
perhaps Dan was thinking for an American audience , but i think he is right that if we dont ask the right questions about spending how will we know wether an elite is ceaming of millions in a fake market , constructed by marxist politicians , to fund the champagne socialist party . socialised medicene does not ask the right questions about running a lean operation , but then again under labour many other goverment operations have forgot ask , “who pays for it”
Its like a tale of two patients , patient A (private industry) has always given blood to help patient B (those in need of care) , if patient A is in good health it can recover and donate help to patient B again . Under labour patient A has had multiple tubes put into it , and the transfusion left on as patient B has turned into a friendly banker that needs bounus .
that is what is rubbing the Americans up so much they think you work your own ticket , you decide how to spend your money and live your life even with health care . the American system has flaw as well , try asking a doctor how much his practice insurance is ?? so perhaps there does need to be some changes , but you can see the problem .
Hardworking American does not see why he/she should pay for burnt out bum who sits on his/her arse all day , they see it as robbery , we in this country hold onto its humanitarian aspects .
No wonder it causes so much upset , but thats whats so nausiating about burnhams twitterings , they dont elude to the quality aspects or the wastes of money for purely political goals and propoganda .
Or alternatively, the various parties could invite Gordon to speak!
During his speech:
The Labour lot would clap
The Tory lot would point and laugh
The LibDem lot would nod their heads and same everyone is entitled to their own point of view and it isn’t for them to judge them!
The B__N_**P lot would throw things
Reader: What would you and your lot do?
Throw the BΝP out.
Both they and UKIP are going to clean-up at the next election. The vacuum created by the total absence of the Conservative Party on the right-wing means an open goal for UKIP and the BΝP. Can it really be merely an accident??
Why would you want to go whoring amongst the unspeakables? Surely you can’t be short of a few bob, Guido? More to be gained outside the tent pissing inwards, rather than selling out to the establishment – because that’s what you will be doing.
The quantity – and quality – of postings on this site has become sadly tedious and largely irrelevant, which is a hardship for those of us who enjoy debate and thinking contributions. Could we have a separate site for those who prefer to bore each other, score silly points, and enter irrelevant comments? Or perhaps better, they might read carefully their own and similar contributions and get the message.
Monty might have a point. He could set one up, I suppose. Blogger is free to use, after all.
Meanwhile Things can only get worser! (sic) Ainsworth attacks the public, generals attack Ainsworth as more soldiers die, Mandelson will never, ever be Labour leader. Hmm…
When will Ainsworth be booted from the role he is so unsuited for?
When ‘ell freezes over?
See they’ve reduced silly Stuart Bell’s geriatric jollop dose so he can get indignant about Duncan.
Heh!
Everyday including today,I start my day by looking at the BBC1 Teletext Headlines.
I am utterly flabbergasted that the reporting of three more British Troops
killed in Helmand appears at item number 113,surely it should be the first
news item at 104.
On a lighter note just just been reading all about Jordan’s big split in the
on line Daily Mirror. Not a pretty sight.
Guido Addressing Party Conferences ? Why Not ? After All Johnny Cash Did Play San Quentin !
Pity you weren’t at the Edinburgh fringe, Guido.
I’m sure there’s a lot of fellow Scots who’d love to hear you say to their face how we’re supposedly responsible for Britain’s decline. Me included.
Stay off the drink now, y’hear?
“No one has actually asked Guido to speak on the Labour fringe yet…”
You are a Tory. Why would they?