Post links to sleaze stories in the comments and Guido will summarise them.   It is a dirty job, but someone has to do it…

Frank Cook claimed  back a £5 donation made at a church service to commemorate the sacrifice of RAF pilots.  The left wing MP for Stockton North signed the claim thus: “Battle of Britain church service, Sunday 17.09.06. £5 contribution to offertory on behalf of Frank Cook MP.”  Where do you start?

Multi-millionaire Labour backbencher Mohammed Sarwar claimed £100,000 to cover mortgage interest that he paid from an account with a Swiss bank. Tax needn’t be taxing…

Lord Clarke of Hampstead, former chairman of the Labour Party, admits he fiddled expenses, but he is remorseful. “It looks like I’ve made a terrible error…. I’m responsible for my own actions . . . If I have to go to the wall and my life is finished in terms of political or public life . . . then so be it . . . I regret what I’ve done and shall be seeking to make amends by speaking to the accountants.” Wonder if that “remorseful” line will work for pickpockets?

The Sunday Times has a claim that Gordon is going to attempt a last reshuffle immediately the day after the Thursday election.  He wants to put Ed Balls in number 11.  Hell why not, the insane Caligula tried make his horse a consul.  The Prime Mentalist making his most loathed acolyte the second most important person in government should be worth another 5% off Labour’s polling.  Go ahead Gordon, make Guido’s day…

Who could the “high-level” source of the story be?  Mandelson blocking Balls by front-running Ed’s ambitions to provoke a backlash?  One bit of the story made Guido laugh -

Balls, who is widely respected in the City, could appear a younger, fresher face than Alistair Darling to take on George Osborne, the shadow chancellor, in the run-up to the elections.

Widely respected by who?  He is despised in the City by everyone who has had dealings with him.  Is Balls pushing this story himself?  If so he must be as mad as his fuhrer.  Is everyone in the bunker bonkers?