Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Slowly…

Anthony Wells Goes Corporate

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

From the Tory website:
The Constitutional College of the Conservative Party has, in a postal ballot, voted for the proposal to change the rules for electing the Party Leader, but by an insufficient majority to effect the change.

Party Chairman, Francis Maude, said, “both MPs and the voluntary party have… decided to stick with the old system. It’s been a worthwhile debate and we’ll now get on with electing a new leader.”

Number in favour of the proposal: 611 (61.0%)
Number against the proposal: 389 (38.9%)
Number of MPs in favour of the proposal: 132 (71.4%)
Number of MPs against the proposal: 53 (28.6%)
Number of volunteers in favour of the proposal: 446 (58.4%)
Number of volunteers against the proposal: 317 (41.5%)
Number of Peers and MEPs in favour of the proposal: 33 (63.5%)
Number of Peers and MEPs against the proposal: 19 (36.5%)

Let Guido do an Anthony Wells style analysis (he uses computers, I’m using whiskey) – 71% of MPs think the activists are too stupid to be given a vote and 58% of the activists agree.

"Four More Years"

Last time I heard that chant it was at Bush’s pre-election Republican Party rally, but careful lip-readers will have noticed Cherie mouthing it on the platform during the applause for Tony. A Neo-con chant is not what I expect from our mantra-mad First Lady. Where’s Carole?

Monday, September 26, 2005

Blunkett and the Young Blonde – No Denial

How does he do it? Theories:-
  • Hung like a donkey?
  • Good in dark bedrooms?
  • Sensual fingers from sliding them along braille means he can tip a girl over the top digitally?
  • Some girls like weirdie beardies?
  • He lies his way into their affections?

More ideas in the comments please.

[Hattersly joins the "Blunkett is a liar" chorus.]

From the Comments:
Lagwolf said…
“With Blunkett you know he is not leering at other women.”

Chris said…
“they like his dog?”

Toque said…
“Free rail travel.”

Sunday, September 25, 2005

"Bollocks to Blair" is Illegal

Saturday, September 24, 2005

George in Washington

Gorgeous is enjoying his new celebrity status as the darling of the U.S. left and his tour will culminate with his return to Washington for the big anti-War demo today with his new friend, Jane Fonda.

But his previous visit to Washington may come back to haunt him, the American Speccie (not to be confused with our own Sextator) reckons he lied on oath to that Senate Committee. Guido is shocked, not.

Hat tip : Theo Spark

Update: Hanoi Jane was a no show. She made some feeble excuse, but the real reason is thought to be that she has been tipped off about George.

Friday, September 23, 2005

Modern Conservatives Coming Soon…

Shock : Politician in Honest Reply Sensation

The Boy Miliband has shocked the whole of Westminster by admitting to a 180 degree U-turn in policy. “We were wrong and it would endanger votes at the next election” he admits. The last bit, although true, Guido made up. Still he is being half honest, which is a 50% improvement on most politicians.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

David Canzini CCHQ

David Canzini leaves CCHQ tomorrow (to marry Vanessa apparently). He was responsible for the Tory campaign in marginal seats. An admirer of Machiavelli, he failed to emulate his hero successfully, but he claims to have pioneered the Machiavellian use of those annoying push-polling telephone techniques – “Would you vote Labour if they changed their policy from eating babies to only eating toddlers?” Ah well, smile and dial…

Seen Elsewhere

Apple’s Tim Cook: iGay | Techno Guido
Insurgent Parties Plunge Labour Into Crisis | Alex Wickham
Mind-Bending Politics of Drugs | Mark Wallace
PC Worries Prevent Police Protecting Young Girls | Jill Kirby
Miliband Should Win Rochester | Martin Kettle
Thatcher Minister Sir John Nott ‘Voted for UKIP’ | Times
Time to Listen to Drugs Experts | Guardian
Drug Laws Don’t Work | Times
Our Moral Duty to Cut Taxes | David Cameron
Greens Ahead of LibDems | Guardian
Channel 4 to Spoof UKIP Election Win | Guardian


VOTER-RECALL
Find out more about PLMR


David Cameron drug policy reformer and leadership contender in 2005…

“Politicians attempt to appeal to the lowest common denominator by posturing with tough policies and calling for crackdown after crackdown. Drugs policy has been failing for decades.”



“Digger” Murdoch says:

Is it just me, or is Nigel Farage just a top hat and a monocle away from being a Batman villain?


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