Axelrod Speaks: Guru Lukewarm About Miliband on CNN

David Axelrod was caught off guard by Christiane Amanpour on CNN and asked about Ed Miliband. Watch his face fall:

The most positive thing Axe says is that that polls say Ed could win and that no one likes the Tories. A minute later he says to ignore the polls.

Unsurprisingly, Axelrod refuses to compare Ed to Obama. He doesn’t sound very enthusiastic about things though.

You would have thought for £300,000 Labour could have given their star guru at least one or two talking points about what their leader is up to?

Axelrod: Ed Is No Obama

It is 95 days since David Axelrod has bothered to mention Miliband on Twitter, the PLP are sharpening their knives and Labour’s six figure strategist has let slip that he is done with campaigning. Today Axelrod earns his dollar by telling the Guardian that his star British client “falls short of Obama”:

DA: “I had been spoiled. The thought of starting over with someone new – and almost certainly somebody who would fall short of Obama – was unappealing.”

Guardian: Would he put the Labour leader into that same category?

DA: “I think Obama’s a once-in-a-lifetime candidate. I can’t think of another person who I would put in his category in my experience of consulting. So I wouldn’t put that burden on Ed or anyone. I think Ed is a smart, earnest guy.”

The Axe was then asked for his six word summary of Labour’s election message. He replied:

“The promise of fixing Britain and creating jobs is that it says nothing about raising wages or economic security. That’s what’s fundamentally missing. If you are willing to proliferate zero-hour contracts and encourage policies that undercut wages you may claim that you’re creating jobs but you are also creating jobs that don’t support families. The question is do you have economic policies that are going to promote living wages, put people who are working hard in a position to support their families? Are you making education and training accessible to young people or are you going to make it so costly they are burdened with debt when they leave? The Tories just don’t look at the British economy through the lens of everyday people. They don’t have a kitchen table philosophy of economics and that’s why the recovery hasn’t reached kitchen tables around Britain.”

That’s 145 words. In the same interview Axelrod admits “my colleagues” deal with Labour rather than him. No kidding…

Hillary Clinton Welcomes Boris Home to USA

The next PM and President?

After a shaky start, it seems the Mayor’s East Coast tour is finally beginning to get going: ie he’s getting the pictures he wants. Let’s hope Hillary can forgive what Boris once said of her:

“She’s got dyed blonde hair and pouty lips, and a steely blue stare, like a sadistic nurse in a mental hospital… represents, on the face of it, everything I came into politics to oppose: not just a general desire to raise taxes and nationalize things, but an all-round purse-lipped political correctness.”

He’s got more in common with her husband…

Axed: 90 Days Since Obama Guru Spun for Labour

David Axelrod

David Axelrod is really earning his crust from Labour, telling a book-promoting interview that he’s retiring from campaigning: “I’m not going back on that circuit. It’s exhilarating, it’s addictive, but it’s not good for you. I’m done”. With his comments picked up by the Sun this morning, and sure to wind up already tetchy Labour MPs, Guido has crunched the numbers. Today it has been 90 days since Axelrod even bothered to mention his star British client on Twitter. He was reportedly in London for a brief visit in December, but is embarking on a book tour around the USA for the duration of the British election campaign. Worth every penny…

Romney Not Running

The Daily Beast exclusive that Mitt Romney is to run for President again will be staying exclusive. Romney says:

After putting considerable thought into making another run for president, I’ve decided it is best to give other leaders in the Party the opportunity to become our next nominee…

I’ve been asked, and will certainly be asked again if there are any circumstances whatsoever that might develop that could change my mind. That seems unlikely. Accordingly, I’m not organizing a PAC or taking donations; I’m not hiring a campaign team.

I encourage all of you on this call to stay engaged in the critical process of selecting a Republican nominee for President. Please feel free to sign up on a campaign for a person who you believe may become our best nominee.

I believe a Republican winning back the White House is essential for our country, and I will do whatever I can to make that happen.

To all my supporters, friends and family who worked both tirelessly and loyally to support my campaigns in the past, I will always be deeply appreciative. What you have already done is a tribute to your patriotism. We are overwhelmed and humbled by your loyalty to us, by your generosity of spirit, and by your friendship. God bless you all.

Read the statement in full here. Stupid idea in the first place.

Sorry Obama Couldn’t Be Bothered, But Here’s James Taylor

John Kerry reaffirmed his status as international diplomacy’s leading pillock this afternoon with his excruciatingly embarrassing apology to France. After no senior American official could be bothered to attend the unity rally in Paris last week, John Kerry stowed James Taylor in his hand luggage for his visit to the French capital. Taylor was paraded at a press conference to sing “You’ve got a friend…” Which wasn’t at all awkward…

Dave: Obama Does Call Me Bro

The big news from Dave’s trip to the States: confirmation that the leader of the free world does call him “bro”.

“It’s normally Barack and David, I hasten to add… well, it’s been said.”

“Call me bro…”

via BBC

Look Mehdi, US Cartoon Mocks 9/11 And No One Gets Shot

“I’m fed up with the hypocrisy of the free speech fundamentalists,” says Mehdi Hasan as he finally gives his two cents on the Paris terror attack. He asks: “Has your publication, for example, run cartoons mocking the Holocaust? No? How about caricatures of the 9/11 victims falling from the twin towers? I didn’t think so (and I am glad it hasn’t).”

Actually, Mehdi, US cartoons constantly make jokes about 9/11, and pretty mainstream, much-loved ones too. Here are just three such gags from Family Guy:

And look, a “cartoon mocking the Holocaust”:

And yet no one reached for their Kalashnikov…

‘ISIS’ Hack US Military During Obama Security Speech

image

Cyber jihad!

How Republicans Won the Senate

The GOP easily won the six seats they needed to take the Senate in last night’s mid-terms, Mashable’s Lego senate GIF shows you how they did it. Everything is awesome…

Don’t tell the lefties, but the GOP last night elected:

  • The youngest woman
  • First black woman Republican
  • First Southern black Senator
  • First woman from Iowa

Rising star Joni Ernst becomes Iowa’s first female senator, helped by her unique experience of “how to cut pork”:

Squeal!

Democrats Bullying Voters With Big Data

Is this rather menacing letter being pushed through doors stateside evidence of the Democrats resorting to bullying voters with big data? Worth having a read of this passage from Sasha Issenberg’s “The Victory Lab”, the seminal text on Obama’s digital campaigning. Issenberg writes that the Democrats previously considered the exact same tactic, but “no candidate or group wanted to be associated with a tactic that looked a lot like bullying – and a bit like blackmail”.

This time round it seems they’ve decided to play nasty…

Bush Aide Live Tweets 9/11

Former White House press secretary Ari Fleischer has spent the day live-tweeting a remarkable moment by moment account of his experience of 9/11 with George W. Bush:

Farage Stands With Rand

The potential next leader of the free world… and Rand Paul.

WATCH: John McCain Does the Robot

Would we be seeing heads cut off on Iraqi street corners had this man been Commander in Chief?

WATCH: Robin Williams on Iraq

Robin Williams’ three minute history of Clinton, Dubya, Iraq and Obama was pretty funny (some strong language):

RIP.

Awkward Ed Miliband White House Moments

Ed arrived at the White House last night hoping President Obama might take a moment out of dealing with several world crises to help him with his election campaign:

20140722-080938-29378868.jpg

The Labour leader got his 25 minute ‘brush-by’ with the President. This was the least bad photo:

20140722-081027-29427574.jpg

They discussed Ukraine, Gaza, the EU and the economy. Just over six minutes each subject.

20140722-081154-29514480.jpg

What was in Stewart Wood’s bag? Surely not a gift from the Commons shop. Fortunately he just went for some DVDs, including House of Cards. The British version, obviously.

Ed didn’t exactly look comfortable:

Of course, within minutes the internet had delivered its verdict:

20140722-081439-29679004.jpg

Well at least it went better than Gordon, just…

Washington Unmoved By Miliband Visit

There is no mention of Ed Miliband’s unscheduled ‘brush-by’ with President Obama in Mike Allen’s Playbook, the morning round up of anything going on in Washington that matters to anyone who is anybody in Washington. Sebastian Payne at the Post reports that Ed is scheduled to meet national security adviser Susan Rice this afternoon, officially the White House pointedly says there is “nothing to announce on the president’s schedule”. Presumably at this point Obama will drop in, if he doesn’t have a world war to avoid. Damian McBride, recounting the President’s five snubs of Gordon Brown and subsequent humiliating chat in a kitchen, has his fingers crossed:

“Team Miliband will have left nothing to chance before their man’s meeting at the White House today. For starters, they will have ensured he gets at least as much ceremony and time as David Cameron enjoyed in his first visit to President Bush as leader of the opposition. Aides will have their stopwatches out, ready to squash any suggestion that Mr Miliband was given less time than he was due…

The reality is that every presidential summit, visit, brush-by, drop-in, and walk-and-talk is nowadays so stage-managed that only someone as afflicted by bad luck as Gordon Brown could ever come a cropper. Provided Obama turns up and the White House doesn’t serve bacon sandwiches, today’s meeting will be the diplomatic equivalent of the speaking clock.”

Miliband’s intellectual henchman Stewart Wood was responsible for White House relations under Gordon Brown, surely he will ensure that this time there is no screw up. Interestingly McBride names Dougie Alexander as the source of the leak of the ‘five snubs’ story back in 2009. Which goes some way to explain the enmity between him and Michael Dugher, then Brown’s comms chief…

Foreign Office Rendition Files ‘Destroyed by Water Damage’

Official documents recording flights in and out of Diego Garcia, the British Indian Ocean Territory where the United States is accused of carrying out ‘extraordinary rendition’ of terror suspects, have been destroyed by water damage. The Foreign Office says that records from 2002, the year in which former Foreign Secretary David Miliband admitted two US rendition flights landed on the island, are “incomplete”. Answering a written question from Tory MP Andrew Tyrie today, Foreign Office minister Mark Simmonds confirms:

“Records on flight departures and arrivals on Diego Garcia are held by the British Indian Ocean Territory immigration authorities. Daily occurrence logs, which record the flights landing and taking off, cover the period since 2003. Though there are some limited records from 2002, I understand they are incomplete due to water damage.”

Diego Garcia has been dogged by allegations that it is used by the US government as a base to torture terror suspects with impunity. The last Labour government was forced to apologise after admitting rendition flights landed there in 2002, despite previous denials. And now files from that year have been destroyed…

More Want to Leave the EU Than Stay In

President Obama is in Brussels with Dave to tell us how he thinks the British people should be voting. He says Scots should vote no to freedom and that Britain should stay in the EU, haughtily remarking: “I’m sure the people of Britain will make the right decision”. Unfortunately for the President an ITV/ComRes poll out today shows more Britons want to leave the EU than stay in. 42% would vote to leave if there was a referendum tomorrow and just 40% would vote to stay. Sadly Obama didn’t give us his verdict on whether the people of Newark should go for Robert Jenrick or Roger Helmer today…

Arnie on Boris

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