It’s the final Twitter bitch fight of the year, and who better to lace up their gloves one last time than two veterans of the ring: Steve Bray and Owen Jones. They’re back for round 2.
Co-conspirators would be forgiven for thinking their inaugural bout back in September would be their first and last encounter. After all, the final bell rang when Bray decided to block Jones entirely. Today, however, in the spirit of Christmas, the prizefighters have given the people what they really want, and picked up where they left off:
Owen Jones is just an insignificant twat to be honest! I wouldn't worry about that waste of space! https://t.co/gSkwnmPRk2
— Steve Bray on Mastodon @SNB19692@Mastodon.Social (@snb19692) December 20, 2022
Far be it for the likes of Steve Bray to hurl an insult like that at anyone. Jones inevitably swung back:
For example, I wish Steve Bray had rightly treated me as the insignificant twat I am at Conservative Conference, rather than bizarrely screaming about me over his loudspeaker and deliberately trying to stop us interviewing Tories by following us around with his music blaring! pic.twitter.com/1LdbOJ2Way
— Owen Jones (@OwenJones84) December 21, 2022
As always, Guido leaves it to co-conspirators to determine the victor…
Owen Jones has laced up his gloves and returned to the Twitter Bitch Fight arena for another bout. This time, in the blue and gold corner, it’s professional nuisance Steve Bray. Let battle commence.
The opening bell rang when Owen claimed “none of the FBPE types” had intervened when he was being heckled by Tommy Robinson’s goons outside Millbank in 2019. Here’s Owen’s own footage from that day…
Just met some lovely Tommy Robinson fans and I’d love for you to get to know them too pic.twitter.com/iRom8GavNy
— Owen Jones (@OwenJones84) January 7, 2019
Bray, who’s not exactly known for keeping quiet, piped up to say the FBPE crew had actually come to Owen’s rescue. Steve himself apparently even offered a reassuring hand once it was over, like the hero he really is:
For the record I am 100% certain that members of SODEM & as you call them 'FBPE types' did intervene and assist you. Afterwards, I even asked you if you were OK or if there was anything we could do to help you! https://t.co/d3yhX4YrQ7
— Steve Bray Activist Against Brexit +Corrupt Tories (@snb19692) September 1, 2022
Jones remembers things slightly differently, though…
Don’t gaslight me over my own experiences of being hounded by fascists?
— Owen Jones (@OwenJones84) September 1, 2022
The whole thing was filmed and ends with me entering 4 Millbank.
So can you withdraw and apologise for implying I’m a liar, please? https://t.co/SQ3QvppBKv
Rather than apologising, Bray switched gears. Now, instead of offering a supporting hand, he’s insisting his own encounters with protesters were far worse anyway…
What you had for a couple of minutes...we had for over 3 months, I won't be apologising. Your filming doesn't start at the beginning!
— Steve Bray Activist Against Brexit +Corrupt Tories (@snb19692) September 1, 2022
Obviously that didn’t land well with Owen. The fight continues…
Your tweet clearly implies I'm a liar, and I started filming almost exactly at the start, the fact you refuse to say "oh ok sorry I was wrong" is all anybody needs to know about you.
— Owen Jones (@OwenJones84) September 1, 2022
The back-and-forth parrying goes on for a while longer, until Bray eventually lands the final blow in suggesting Owen’s footage simply didn’t capture the FBPE-ers bravery, and rather than continuing the fight, he’s just going to block Jones instead.
Sorry for this everyone but I'm blocking this 🥱now.
— Steve Bray Activist Against Brexit +Corrupt Tories (@snb19692) September 1, 2022
As always, Guido leaves it to co-conspirators to determine the winner…
Forget the Tory Birmingham husting, Guido was privileged to have a ring-side seat at the internecine BBC-on-BBC bias row of the year last night. In the red corner, doing his job and defending BBC impartiality: Neil Henderson, Home and Foreign News Editor & Tomorrow’s Papers Today tweeter; in the blue corner, doing his damndest to undermine the entire BBC: crisp muncher Gary ‘overpaid’ Lineker. Ding ding…
The row started over a day-old tweet from Lineker, who put all his little grey cells towards political commentary to come up with the fair and not-at-all-oversimplified take: “As a politician how could you ever, under any circumstances, bring yourself to vote for pumping sewage into our seas? Unfathomable!” Obviously no politician could – and they haven’t – though the tweet did its job by getting 44,000 likes…
Guido remembers the new BBC director general Tim Davie coming in on a promise of cracking down on BBC stars flouting impartiality rules, such as taking them off Twitter. Fellow BBC employee Neil Henderson made this exact point to Gary, saying he’d be sacked if he tried tweeting such political propaganda:
Unfortunately, it seems Gary is blithely unaware of the fact BBC impartiality applies across all colleagues, not just those in news and current affairs. Guido would be happy to take a look at Lineker’s contract on his behalf…
Neil had one last bite before deleting his spat entirely, probably realising the row was just as bad a look for the BBC as Gary’s unbridled politicking. Henderson correctly asserted:
Guido looks forward to hearing Tim Davie’s thoughts on all this the next time he’s up in front of the DCMS Select Committee. Usually Guido leaves it to co-conspirators to decide who wins a bitch fight, this time there’s only one answer…
This week’s Twitter Bitch Fight is a left-wing box office blockbuster. In the red corner, it’s reformed Trotskyite Paul Mason. In the even redder corner, it’s literal communist Ash Sarkar. A fight for the ages…
The opening bell rang when Sarkar mocked a Redcar Labour Party campaign video which claimed “Tory cuts” had unleashed rampant crime on the local community. For uber cool online commies, streets rife with antisocial behaviour is the sort of thing only home county, pearl-clutching Tories should get het up about…
Kids on quad bikes, doing wheelies? Call Scotland Yard!
Fortunately Paul Mason was on-hand to point out that the footage clearly showed illegal behaviour, and was probably worth stopping:
Here you go: from the Northern Echo - and it's a problem in numerous working class communities, as this Walsall Police leaflet shows...oh, and age is a HRA protected characteristic for a reason: try getting out of the way if you're elderly or infirm pic.twitter.com/mK3HGGYYSf
— Paul Mason (@paulmasonnews) August 9, 2022
Sarkar was having none of it. She returned with a (far) left jab about Mason’s alleged leaked emails, which appeared to show him referring Novara and other left-wing outlets to the Foreign Office’s Counter Disinformation Unit for producing pro-Putin talking points. Awkward…
Shopping young people to the cops for riding quadbikes is nearly as risible as shopping leftwing media organisations to the security services.
— Ash Sarkar (@AyoCaesar) August 9, 2022
Mason is still claiming the contents of those leaks, including his brilliantly designed McCarthyite organogram, “may be edited, distorted or fake“. “May be”…
It was a Russian hack and leak operation that produced content that may be edited, distorted or fake. I was the victim of a serous crime. You are the victim of Russian disinformation. Read more about "tainted leak" operations here: https://t.co/mqMTlJ40Fz
Mason then tried changing the subject back to policing. To no avail…
1) I wrote an article criticising the police policy at the time.
— Ash Sarkar (@AyoCaesar) August 9, 2022
2) Answer the question – did you make a map which had an arrow pointing from Novara Media to the black community, yes or no?
At the time of going to pixel, Mason still hasn’t confirmed or denied whether he made the mind map. All in all, another entertaining bout. As always, Guido leaves it to co-conspirators to determine the winner…
An unstoppable political force has met an immovable broadcasting object, as Tory Labour MP Christian Wakeford makes his Twitter Bitch Fight debut against series veteran Piers Morgan. A culture war clash of the ‘titans’…
The opening bell rang when Piers decided he wanted some attention. With the England Women’s football team beating Spain last night, Morgan spotted his chance:
The England persons who menstruate football team are superb. Well played Lionesses. 👏👏👏👏
— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) July 20, 2022
Of course, Wakeford swallowed this planet-sized bait whole, wading in to teach Morgan a lesson in civility and inclusive language by calling him “a pathetic d*ckhead”:
Imagine being such a pathetic dickhead that you can’t just enjoy things without using the opportunity to make it all about you.
— Christian Wakeford MP (@Christian4BuryS) July 21, 2022
No one is stopping you saying women, stop pretending to misunderstand gender inclusive language & creating a hostile environment for Trans people. https://t.co/LEybXymnGy
Having found an opponent with enough time on their hands to bother replying, Morgan immediately shot back:
Forgive me if I don’t take lectures on language usage from a woke-ravaged foul-mouthed clown MP who defected from the party he was elected to represent to a party he called ‘a bunch of c*nts.’ But many thanks for your thoughts. https://t.co/9dRKUDFYrm
— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) July 21, 2022
Wakeford still had plenty of fight in him, hitting Morgan where it hurts… his viewership:
If being woke is looking out for those more vulnerable than myself, when used by the media as a punch bag then I wear the badge proudly.
— Christian Wakeford MP (@Christian4BuryS) July 21, 2022
Sacked from The Mirror, sacked from CNN and still crying over Meghan at night. No wonder you’re getting about 10 viewers a night. https://t.co/gQd3Grc1vm
Ooof. Of course, Piers wasn’t about to back down either:
Park the virtue-signalling you ludicrous twerp, and answer this simple question so we can all work out what you stand for:
— Piers Morgan (@piersmorgan) July 21, 2022
What is a woman? https://t.co/wpUwcMT3WV
A “ludicrous twerp“. What a haymaker. Still, Wakeford kept the fight going by revealing he can’t actually count:
“Virtue signalling”
— Christian Wakeford MP (@Christian4BuryS) July 21, 2022
“Woke”
You truly are pathetic aren’t you?
There were 11 women out on that pitch last night. If you can’t see that I’m afraid I can’t help you. https://t.co/vLPtp8it1K
Realising there were in fact 22 women on the pitch last night, not 11, Wakeford gave it another go, although he still hasn’t yet responded to Piers’ direct question of “what is a woman?“. Perhaps he’ll save that for a future bout. For now, Guido leaves it, as always, for co-conspirators to decide the victor…
As Alex Wickham approaches the end of his time as Playbook editor, one gets the sense that his SW1 diplomacy skills are beginning to fade. This morning Patrick Maguire – editor of The Times Red Box – received a glowing endorsement for his rival morning newsletter from Matt Chorley, including the less-than-subtle dig that it’s “unencumbered by being too close to No10.”
If you're not reading @patrickkmaguire's Red Box every morning, you're missing out.
— Matt Chorley (@MattChorley) May 20, 2022
Concise, smart, funny, unencumbered by being too close to No10.
It's so good, the FT have launched a carbon copy of it
Latest one: https://t.co/HFpSffgx7D
Subscribe https://t.co/9X3raNDYWa pic.twitter.com/IbNZNyeD27
A dig Wiki couldn’t take lying down…
another tweet! You’re obsessed. Certainly makes a difference from all your texts begging to go into my runners and riders. Is that cos you’re desperate for a different job or to still appear relevant?
— Alex Wickham (@alexwickham) May 20, 2022
Chorley walked straight into Wiki’s trap, however, denying ever asking to be included in a runners and rider’s list. Thankfully Alex had the receipts…
thanks and all the best pic.twitter.com/6S1jbrXctn
— Alex Wickham (@alexwickham) May 20, 2022
Guido’s surprised to see Matt Chorley severing ties with Politico in this way – as co-conspirators will be aware he was considered a prime front runner to replace Wiki, as per Guido’s runners and riders list. Alas it wasn’t to be…
