Cameron outwits old soak Karl Turner at PMQs:

“I’m sure I’ll get all sorts of pleasant surprises on my birthday, so please don’t spoil it by telling me what they are.”

Tim Harford in the FT:

“As human freedoms go, the freedom to take your custom elsewhere is not a grand or noble one – but neither is it one that we should abandon without a fight.”

Hugo Rifkind in the Times:

“Something is different now. Antisemitism has always spiked when Israel deploys the Israeli Defence Force, but this time the ire is not confined to Israelis. Instead, far more than before, protesters are using, and twisting, the word “Zionists”. Many, even most, probably don’t mean any harm by it. Perhaps they see it as a narrowing term, a way to specifically not attack all Jews or even all Israelis, but merely those who wish to ethnically cleanse Palestine of Palestinians and put Jews there instead. The trouble is, “Zionism” doesn’t mean that. It’s a broad term and it refers to the simple fact of there being a Jewish homeland at all. Believe in a two-state solution? You’re a Zionist. Strive for a bi-national state? Also a Zionist. The United Nations is Zionist. Technically, even the Palestinian Authority is Zionist; that’s what the damn word means.”

Mick Twister on Warsi:

Conservative Baroness Warsi

Is getting increasingly arsy

For now she’s resigned,

The Tories, we find,

Are white, male and too upper-classy.

Boris on Jo Johnson’s closeness to No.10:

“A little piece of me dies but otherwise I rejoice in his success.”

Knifed former civil service chief Bob Kerslake on his recent troubles:

“Many thks for kind wishes following back opn. Incision measured 16cm. A pretty big knife in the back! Photos on request.”