It’s been over three months since the general election, and almost all new MPs (335 of them – over half of the Commons) are still without phones in their parliamentary offices. Thanks to Westminster’s sluggish and bureaucratic setup, the only way to get in touch with them is via email, which usually takes weeks to get a response. Not exactly ideal for those needing to get business done…
Fresh-face MPs have complained to Guido about the how “frustrating” the painfully slow process has been. Not least because any hack with a deadline who wants to speak to an MP’s office have no efficient way of doing so. Some have taken matters into their own hands, with one LibDem MP even posting their business WhatsApp number on the parliamentary website just to be contactable. If it takes more than three months just to install a phone, one wonders how long it takes to get anything else done…
With the dust settling on Labour’s election landslide, many former Tory MPs have been enjoying their first summer of freedom since their schooldays. Here are some of the more eye-catching examples…
- Richard Graham, former MP for Gloucester, has been piling on the runs on the cricket pitch, with scores of 110 not out and 135 not out. He was soon sledged for “getting more runs than he did votes…”
- Alex Chalk, former Lord Chancellor and Secretary of State for Justice, donned his vest and trainers for the Cheltenham half marathon, finishing in a respectable 1:47:40. A way to go to beat fastest-MP Mathew Paris’ blistering 1.17 effort in 1985…
- Robert Buckland, another former Lord Chancellor and Secretary of State for Justice, has confessed he’s been having a ‘brat summer’ (brat meaning chaotic, braless and imperfect for the uneducated.) Not sure British pop-star Charli XCX had test match cricket, the opera, and exploring the Austrian Danube in mind when she coined the phrase…
- Greg Hands, former MP for Chelsea and Fulham, has embarked on an impressive gap year travelling through the US, Mexico and Canada, not to mention interrailing around northern India. Finding yourself is more fun than finding a job…
- Meanwhile David TC Davies, former Secretary of State for Wales, has taken a hefty pay cut to become a senior advisor to Laura Anne Jones, Member of the Senedd for South East Wales. The only thing worse than being opposition in Westminster is being opposition in Cardiff…
Post-Westminster life isn’t all rosy, though. One former Tory MP tells Guido “many of the traditionalists are ruing the fact their first summer off has coincided with the worst grouse and salmon season for decades.” Feather and fin proving as elusive as votes…
UPDATE: Matthew Offord gets in touch to showcase his sailing of a yacht from Guernsey to Greece over the summer:
Tensions are high over MPs’ safety with protestors outside houses and Hoyle’s claims that he broke with proper procedure on Wednesday out of fears for security. MPs are jittery when talking about taxpayer-funded security for their homes – details of what is spent on what equipment is kept private so as to not identify properties. If you knew a house was fitted with nine bedroom locks you could surmise it was Andrew Griffith‘s Westminster pad…
Poorly-performing Chubb was replaced by ADT in 2021, though they don’t appear to be doing much better. MPs complain to Guido that, when it comes to security, they “might as well not have any“. The centralised call-arounds have personnel bringing the wrong equipment, turning up late, “not finishing the job“, and demanding MPs return home for useless form-filling. For a multi-million pound contract you might expect a lock to be fitted correctly…
A Red Wall MP in Nottinghamshire tells Guido:
“An engineer came to my house to fit CCTV. One of the cameras was fitted upside down which forced me to learn how to do a headstand. Mind you, the sole engineer did the work of two men – Laurel & Hardy that is.“
MPs feel insecure on many levels…
As Rishi faces turmoil within his party over the Rwanda scheme and the Tories drag more than 20 points in the polls behind Labour, rumours continue to swirl around SW1 of an early election. The results are set to be dismal for the Tories, and according to Polimapper’s “prime candidate” pool the UK will see the highest proportion of new MPs since 1945, when just over half of elected MPs were new. If the election reflects the polls and Labour gain a large majority, a whopping 41% of MPs will be green on the benches. That’s partly thanks to some 77 MPs announcing they’ll stand down in the next election, while other MPs have had their whip removed following various scandals. 70% are also projected to live locally. Labour better start hiring handholders by the dozen…
Frustrated staffers plan to ditch face coverings after July 19th despite being “required” to wear them, after Guido revealed that MPs have only be “encouraged” to wear face coverings on the Parliamentary estate since June 21st. Guido also hears that some staffers haven’t bothered waiting until the 19th and have already started ditching face masks on the estate, only wearing them in PCH…
This comes after GMB, TUS and Unite unions wrote a letter to Hoyle explaining that Parliamentary staff have been filled with “incredulity, anger and concern” over the mask hypocrisy that has left Parliament with a distinctly upstairs / downstairs vibe. Unions are pushing for everyone to have mandatory masks, although Guido gets the sense both MPs and staffers want the freedom to make their own minds up…
Mansfield’s Ben Bradley is the first* MP to publicly pledge that “if the rumours on a public sector pay freeze are true (and I don’t know whether they are) then needless to say that should include MPs too.”
Jacob Young, the MP for Redcar & Cleveland, says that if the Chancellor “says public sector workers are getting a pay freeze – then I want to be clear, that must include MPs.”
Guido will be contacting MPs to see if who will pledge to freeze their pay in solidarity with the public sector. Ideally the government should find time to simply amend the legislation so that IPSA’s pay rise recommendations can in future be rejected by a straightforward vote on the floor of the Commons. MPs can stop this faux wringing of hands as their pockets are filled with inflation busting pay rises…
In the long term Britain should move to a Singaporean style model for MPs pay – salaries are performance-linked, to ensure that political leaders are accountable for their roles and responsibilities. Pay is benchmarked against high calibre earners’ incomes, then discounted 40% for public service. MPs are paid performance related bonuses on top, with the salaries linked to the socio-economic outcomes of Singaporeans. British MPs’ pay could do with linking to the general prosperity of their voters, the people whose interests they are supposed to represent. If the people prosper, MPs’ pay will rise.
Guido is compiling a tally of MPs who are refusing a pay rise. Are you an MP without their snout in the trough? Email Guido from an @parliament.uk account or with a link to a public statement to join the list of non-wronguns…
