The Honourable Member for Tinder

These screenshots from hook up app Tinder are doing rounds, purporting to be LibDem MP Stephen Gilbert. At least he seems to have kept his clothes on, unlike the last MP to get caught up in online dating. Left swipe.

MPs Laughing at Cancer

Over £100, 000 was raised last night at the Sixteenth Annual Macmillan Cancer Support’s Parliamentary Palace of Varieties. The Daily Politics were there, though they missed Guido losing a bet to LibDem MP John Hemming that Fabricant, Gillan and Binley would slag off the PM in their turn. They didn’t, Hemming got Guido’s money which he very sportingly spent on brandy and port. Glasman and Jesse Norman were blowing their own trumpets once again, yet the star of the night was Lord Dobbs of Gilbert and Sullivan. Michael Fabricant in bunches is a sight you will struggle to forget…

@MsSallyBercow Tweets Sally in Rehab

Sally-Berow-2461841

Late last night an account purporting to be that of Sally Bercow tweeted:

“SB friend for 20 yrs & she asked i tweet 4 her- she in spa/rehab”.

The Speaker’s Office declined the opportunity to comment. Sally was not immediately available at the time of going to pixel…

UPDATE: Sally claims she was hacked. Again. Odd given she was tweeting Andrew Pierce at the time…

Farage Does Drugs

faragedugs

“Last week, Nick Clegg returned from a trip to South America. Goodness knows what he smoked out there, because he actually made a couple of smart points. First, the so-called War on Drugs isn’t working. Second, we should appoint a royal commission to look into the alternatives. The fact is our current approach to drugs is neither practical nor effective. I strongly believe in promoting individual freedom – but I also strongly believe in reducing the public harm caused by drugs. As a parent as much as a politician, I say we have to accept that current policy has not achieved the reductions in crime or consumption that we’d hoped for. I know he slagged me off in this newspaper yesterday, but on this one I agree with Nick.”

Finally a politician with an interesting line

New Photo Emerges of Sally and ‘Friend of Dromey’

Who is the mysterious man Sally is straddling here?

Daily Politics Guide to Westminster Watering Holes

Guido has many fond memories of the Red Lion, not to mention the many more he can’t remember…

IoD Sniff at Ed’s Big Speech

Unsurprisingly business leaders weren’t impressed with Ed’s speech either. Institute of Directors boss Simon Walker has his say:

“The state has a very poor history of creating competition in banking. The last time the Government told a bank what to do, Lloyds was ordered to sell branches to Rev. Flowers, and we all know how that ended.”

Wounder.

Ignore the Spin: 56 Pubs Shut Per Week Under Labour

Labour MP Toby Perkins may well be simple, but that does not excuse his attempts to re-write history. The “Shadow Pubs Minister” has sent out a ham-fisted attack about the “great pub scandal”:

“Labour is forcing a Parliamentary debate on backing local pubs, pressing the Government to act as research shows 26 pubs are closing every week. Too many pubs across Britain are closing their doors and we urgently need action but ministers are dragging their feet. Pubs are vital hubs in communities up and down the country.”

Perkins, a renowned wally, has accused BIS of “dithering”. But lets just rewind a little…

The real “great pub scandal” was that Labour did more to hamstring the pub industry than any other government. At one point under Gordon, according to the BBC, 56 pubs were shutting a week. Then there were the former Chancellor’s crippling 60% rise in booze taxes, as well as the smoking ban destroying thousands of businesses. The ballooning in pub companies was a direct consequence of Brown’s tax relief for breweries introduced in 2002. Labour have some cheek in blaming Vince Cable for a problem they created. By all means highlight the concerns, but Perkins seems to have spent a little too long in the pub.

Sugar is Not ‘the New Tobacco’

The We Can’t Go On Like This Brigade are out in force this morning  and today’s target is sugar. Those of us who predicted that once nanny had got bored of booze and fags, she would come for our sweeties don’t look so stupid now.[…] Read the rest

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WATCH: Highgella: The Movie

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Chris Blackhurst's Kama Sutra

Indy staff have been left baffled this afternoon by an email inviting them to help themselves to “a crate of unclaimed stuff in front of Chris Blackhurst’s desk including some high heels, a copy of the Kama Sutra, an assortment of dog shampoo and a speed camera (hand-held).”

Sounds like one hell of a kinky night…

 […] Read the rest

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Cristal Meth Scandal

Nigel Evans was looking on the bright side when Guido bumped into him last week.

“Whenever I get down, I just think it could be worse. I could be Reverend Flowers.”

Although, unlike the party-loving former boss of the Co-op Bank, Evans told Guido: “I’ve never smoked crystal meth, mind.[…] Read the rest

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Saatchi Claims Nigella Was "Off Her Head" on Coke

It’s been an open secret that Charles Saatchi has been trying to put around the Nigella coke angle, but her lawyers have been stopping anyone from printing it. Now it’s been said in court:

[…] Read the rest

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GALLERY GUIDO: Smear Executive Decided to Smear Labour

We’re making up a Labour smear story.

We’re going for their most cherished example of mutual, collective endeavour. The Co-op. Ethical, modest, decent. Let’s make it go bust through filthy capitalist greed. And let’s get it taken over by US vulture funds who have the power to call in Labour’s loans, but don’t because they act more ethically than the previous management.[…] Read the rest

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WATCH: Rob Ford: The Movie

Via teh internetz.
[…] Read the rest

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Special Offer of the Day

Arena Flowers wins for their outstanding effort at shoehorning Rev Flowers into a promotional offer.[…] Read the rest

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